Vegeta Soup!!!
A fanfic by PrinceVegeta66
A sequel to Freeza Beans, by Steve Golebiewski
A note from the author: Konichiwa, minna-san. As you may know, if you took the time to read the title, I am PrinceVegeta66. This story is meant to take place after the stuff that took place in Freeza Beans. I try to mimic Steve’s sense of humor as much as possible, but, you know, I’m not gonna be exact. Tell me what you think! Arigatou, minna-san, and enjoy the show! ^_~
Narrator: *grumbles something about underpayment* Last time on Freeza Beans, Ecoostik made a wish to change everything to how it was before he turned Freezer into a cannibal. Everyone forgot what happened, and life returned to normal, except for Trunks, who was last sighted riding a donkey somewhere in the Sahara. Anyway, with these words, I present you with the next saga in the Freeza Beans series…
Can I go home NOW????
***
Freeza was taking the monorail over his headquarters. Can’t take chances, he thought as he entered his throne room. He was surprised to see Dodoria in the room.
"Lord Freeza," Dodoria said, "It’s your dinnertime."
"Damn it, I KNEW I should have taken the 10 o’clock monorail instead!" Freeza shouted to himself. "Oh well. I certainly hope that something appetizing is for dinner, Dodoria, hopefully more so than you." He chuckled.
"Of course, Lord Freeza. Soup’s on!"
Freeza took a sip from his spoon. "Hey, this stuff is good!" Freeza exclaimed. "What’s it called?"
"Vegeta Soup, Lord Freeza."
Freeza screamed.
***
Meanwhile, on Earth…
Trunks rode in from the desert, gasping as he went. "Finally…" he gasped, "Good… green…" Then a foot stepped in his path. Trunks looked up. Goten was there, patting down dirt.
Trunks gulped. "H-hi…" Goten stepped up closer.
"N-no Goten!!! It was an accident!!! I was cursed!!! Gote--" Trunks couldn’t finish his sentence before Goten wrestled him to the ground, laughing all the way.
"I sure fooled you, didn’t I?" Goten asked after he got Trunks into a headlock.
"Yeah… really…" Trunks gasped. Then he got up. "Well, I gotta go home, Dad’s making dinner tonight, some new special surprise. Hey, maybe he’ll let you sleep over!"
"Supercallifragalisticexpialidocious!" Goten said. "I can’t WAIT!!! I just hope your dad's in a good mood."
"Yeah. But he’s making dinner tonight, and he’d LOVE anything that could get me outta the way!" Trunks danced around with glee. He then proceeded to fall in a hole.
"Hey… where’d that hole come from?" Trunks asked. "Goten… were you trapping bears without me again?"
"Ghrrooaahhh!!!" answered a voice from inside the hole.
***
Bulma’s kitchen…
Vegeta hummed as he put some salt in the steaming pot. "Wait till those brats taste THIS little delicacy, mwahaha!" Vegeta said to himself.
"I’m home!" cried Trunks, a little unevenly. His little sister, Bra, looked up at him.
"You’re a mess," she said, possibly pointing out the many cuts, tears and bruises on him.
"Both of you, go wash up for dinner, now!" Vegeta shouted.
"Yes, Father dearest and almighty Prince of Saiya-jin," said Trunks and Bra in unison. "Hey, Dad," Began Trunks, "Can Goten sleep over?"
"Hmmm…" Vegeta thought about that. "I guess it would be okay, as long as you stay out of my way!"
"Yes, sir!" Trunks said, and he was at the phone in a flash.
"Daddy," Bra said, "What’s for dinner, anyway?"
"My new creation, Bra-chan," Vegeta said sweetly, surprising Bra, "I call it Vegeta soup."
***
Freeza’s Headquarters…
"Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!" Kui laughed, slapping his knee. "That fake label prank was so hilarious! I congratulate myself!"
"It was genius, Kui," said Dodoria, somewhat nervous, "There’s one tiny problem."
"And what would that be, Dodoria?" Asked Kui.
"Freeza… figured… it… OUT!!!"
There were three screams, coming from Freeza, who had just broken through the wall, Dodoria, and, of course, Kui.
"I’m gonna KILL you, Kui!!!!!!!!!!" Freeza yelled. Kui ran around the headquarters like mad.
"Come, back here, dammit, COME BACK HERE!!!!"
Dodoria sneaked away as the mad chase ensued.
"Moshi moshi, first aid?" Dodoria said into the intercom, "I’m gonna put you on standby alert for the lounge. Thanks."
Dodoria whistled as he walked away, trying to ignore the screams coming from down the hall.
***
Deep in space, an unknown planet…
"Moshi moshi?" King Cold said into the comlink, "I wish to speak to Freeza."
"I’m sorry, he’s not able to take your call right now," squawked a voice on the other end.
Tears came to King Cold’s eyes. "Daddy can’t talk to his little baby!!! Waaaahhhh…"
Kui then ran over the guy on the other end of the video-com.
"No, no, Lord Freeza, it was just a joke!!!! It was a joookkkeee!!!!!!!!"
"Come back here Kui, when I’m through with you and your little ‘joke’--" Freeza stopped in front of the video-com, and smiled a six-year-old-boy-type smile.
"Papa!" he said, not noticing he was stepping on the phone operators back, "So nice to see you again!"
"Same here, son," said King Cold. "But there’s something I want to discuss with you. I recently tasted a delicious new food, and if we could get the rights for it, and maybe pay Vegeta 20% of our profits, we could be rich!!! Er," King Cold corrected himself.
"That’s great, Papa! Eh, may I ask, what’s the name of the product?"
"Vegeta Soup," King Cold said.
"NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Freezer screamed. He then ran around in circles, trying to tear his hair out, but with no success, since he had none. He then fell to the ground, anime style, and started flinching like a dying weasel.
"What was that all about?" King Cold asked his one henchman.
"Search me, boss," said the henchman.
"Oh well," sighed King Cold, opening a can of Vegeta Soup. "I guess I’ll see if Coola is interested…"
***
The Ginyu Tokusentai base…
"Got any 5’s?" Baata asked. Ginyu had had it this time.
"GAAAAAHHHHHRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ginyu shouted, blasting the table into oblivion. "Don’t you GET it???? It’s POKER! PO-KER! P-O-C-K-O…"
"Yeah, yeah," Baata interrupted, "but do you have any 5’s?"
Ginyu sighed. "It’s hopeless. It’s just hopeless." He sighed again. "Well," he said, looking at the charred remains of the table, "What should we do now?" He stared up at Baata, Jiisu, and Gurudo, whose 4 pairs of eyes stared at him blankly. Then Rikum entered the room.
***
PrinceVegeta66: Hey, that rhymes! Rikum entered the room! Rikum entered--- oh, sorry.
***
"Hey, guys!" Rikum shouted. "We got orders from Freeza! We’re supposed to--"
"Get our meaty thighs over there?" Ginyu grumbled.
"Nah, why would he do that? He wants us to try this stuff!" He tosses each of them a warm bowl. They dig into the soup inside.
Ginyu’s eyes lit up. So did the other 8 eyes of the other three team members. "Hey," Baata said, "This stuff is really good!"
"Yeah!" Gurudo chimed in. "What’s this stuff called?"
"Uh… hang on a sec…" Rikum said, reading the label. "Oh, yeah, I remember now! Vegeta Soup!" All four other team members fainted. Rikum just stared. "Was it something I said?"
***
Goten came in the door. "Trunks!" he shouted. "I hope you’re ready to party!"
"Of course!" Trunks laughed. "Did you bring a movie?"
"Yeah, yeah, I recorded it off of late-night TV, it’s called, um….." he checked the tape’s label. "It’s called, ‘Dragon Ball Z TV Special Number Two: Resist Despair!! The Ultimate Surviving Fighters… Gohan and Trunks!’"
"Never heard of it," Trunks said, "But I’ll give anything a try! Let’s go!"
***
"No… *pant*… please… *pant* Lord… *pant* Freeza…" Kui collapsed to the ground in a heap. "A joke… *gasp* … just a joke…"
Freeza jumped into the air. "Joke this, Fish Sticks for Brains!!!" He then came down hard on Kui’s stomach. Kui’s eyes bugged out.
Then Freeza started beating him mercilessly. A cloud of smoke shrouded the little rumble from view, except the fists. "Die die die die die!!!!!" Freezer yelled at the top of his lungs.
"Ow ow ow ow ow!" Kui responded. "I thought nobody dies in cartoons!"
"This isn’t a cartoon, baka, it’s real life!" Then a bunch of henchmen came from nowhere.
"Well, that is a disputable point," said one, "Since we’re drawn in bright colors and all--"
"No, no," said another, "This isn’t a cartoon! It’s real life! People die! Just look at the first saga, Freeza Beans!"
"But we got wished back to life!!! That can’t happen in real life!"
"No, no, it’s not real life or a cartoon! It’s an anime. It’s a show where people have weird hair and noses, and people die a lot, but it’s still cartoon-like! This is an anime called DragonBall Z, which is the sequel series to DragonBall, and after that comes DragonBall GT, but I don’t like that because Akira Toriyama, our creator, didn’t have a say in the writ--"
"Shut up!!! That’s enough out of all of you!!!" shouted Freeza. "You hear me??? All of you get your hides out of my business!!! Out!!! Out!!!" Freeza fried them all with eye lasers.
"Now where was I? Oh yes…" Freeza pounced on Kui.
"No, Master Freeza, don’t---"
"How dare you humiliate---"
"Please, have mercy---"
"Take this!!!"
The next few minutes of fighting were hard to describe, but mixed all together, it sounded something like: "HahhoohhaioahhhoooahiihuhoahahgahhrnooostopaGHHHHooghagsdaHAHghafgesft…"
Several hours later…
***
Trunks’ house, in front of the TV…
***
Freeza’s headquarters…
***
Outer space…
"I’m sure Freeza will take the leftovers from dinner," Vegeta said to himself. He dropped at the entrance to the headquarters and knocked. A pattering of feet was heard, and the door opened.
"Oh, thank goodness it’s YOU, Vegeta," Freeza panted. I thought I was gonna be lost in there forev--- I mean, um, (ahem) What do you want?"
***
***
All of Freeza’s men blasted off to the Ginyu Base on the other side of the asteroid. Zarbon, in the lead, blasted the door open. "Ginyu Tokusentai! It’s an emergency!" he yelled. Then they saw Rikum running like mad, his eyes practically popping from his head.
"Rikum? What’s wrong?" asked Kui, who was in a wheelchair.
"I don’t know!!! These guys fainted after they heard the name of the soup Freeza sent us to try, then when they woke up their eyes were all pink and … and…"
***
Earth…
To be continued...
***
