Part 3 - The Vegeta Soup Boycott!!!
PrinceVegeta66: Well, sorry about the long wait, but it's finally here! Part 3 of Vegeta Soup!!! *angels sing* But anyway, I'm not going to waste time telling you what happened last time on Vegeta Soup. You can read it yourself, for Kami's sake. Now prepare yourself for V--- But, before I start the story, did you... you know... go? Because I don't want to have to stop the story for.... you know....
*ahem* Excellent! Then prepare yourself for... *pulls a lever, and really crappy guitar music plays while the words "The Vegeta Soup Boycott!!!" appears onscreen*
On Freeza's spaceship
"Freeza," Ecoostik said to him, "You don't know how musch trouble the world is really in! You see, my brother, Acoostik, has been spreading his curse of cartoony-ness across the galaxy while framing Vegeta for it!"
"Oh... wow." Freeza replied. "Then what are we waiting for?!? LET'S GO KICK SOME HONEY-BUNS!!!!!!!"
"Well, there's a slight problem." Ecoostik said, forcing a grin.
"What's that?"
"The ship, um, sorta... well, when I was trying to figure out how to start the ship, I shot it through a wall and blew a fuse, and now it's maximum speed is... um, well, let's just say that it can no longer even push in the general direction of the sound barrier."
Freeza sighed. "Oh well," he said, "We'll get there when we get there..."
Back on Earth...
Agents J and K hiked through the wet city streets, hopelessly trying to catch King Cold and Coola. "This is all your fault." J said.
"Thank you for reminding me, J," K replied.
Trunks' house...
"And... and when I turned eight... *sniff* my cousin Icoostik broke my guita-ha-harr...." Acoostik broke into sobs. Goten started wailing too.
"Oh, what a sad story...." he sobbed. "Oh, you poor, poor---" BANG!
Their crying was interrupted abruptly as Vegeta broke out of the closet, ripping ropes off of his legs.
"Alright, mister..." He said to Acoostik, "We have a score to settle!"
Vegeta began charging a Big Bang attack, but he was stopped by Goten.
"No, Vegeta-san, don't do it!" he cried.
"What, why not?!? He tried to frame me for the biggest scandal ever, next to Freeza Beans!!!"
"I-is this boy your son?" Acoostik said through his tears.
"No," Vegeta said... "He's---"
"He's my son!" cried the voice of Goku, who strode into the house with Roly-sav all over his burns from the exploding Gym incident.
"Sir," Acoostik sniffled, "He's an amazing yong man. He helped show me the error of my ways of getting fame and fortune through framing an innocent Saiya-jin Prince for cursing the galaxy."
"Well, I wouldn't say innocent," Vegeta said.
"But now," said Acoostik, "We have business to attend to. We have to go and un-curse the effects of the soup. Our first stop----"
But before Acoostik could say where their first stop was, Trunks and Bra jumped into the room. They hissed as they began to raise their baseball bats, but then Acoostik pulled out a guitar and began to 'sing':
"Oh when I'm go-ow-ow-ow-ow-nnnnnnnn......
Bury me deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep........."
Acoostik paused, as if he were trying to remember the next line, and then he screeched out:
"'Cuz there's wolverines reported in the areaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!"
There was a loud pop, and then Trunks and Bra turned back to normal. "There," said Acoostik. "They'll sleep for a few hours, so I suggest we head to our first stop... "
Tokyo...
"Alright, men," Acoostik said to Goku, Vegeta, and Goten. "Do you understand?"
"Oh for Kami's sake," Vegeta cried, "We distract Coola and Cold, you sing over the city loudspeakers! Even Mr. Satan could understand that!!"
"Good!" said Acoostik. "Good luck, everyone!!!"
The three Saiya-jin flew off into the depths of the city. They searched for a few minutes, and then they found them. Actually, it was the other way around - Vegeta was hit by a water balloon, notifying the Sons that something was definitely wrong. They flew up to attack the two Changeling nerds, but then --
King Cold and Coola cried out a clueless phrase, sending all three Saiya-jin flying to the ground. They then tried to pummel them with Ki blasts, but to no avail, as they bounced off without a scratch.
"The blasts aren't affecting them!" cried Goku.
"Their stupidity is too high!!!" cried Vegeta, his green SSJ eyes going bloodshot. "Where's that blasted Namek-sei-jin?!?!?"
Then a loud noise that a very observant person would have recognized as a terrible attempt at singing rang out into the city:
The voice paused, as if trying to remember the next line, and then...
King Cold and Coola screamed in agony ("Duuuuhhhhhhh!!!!!") then there was a pop, and they returned to normal and fell 50 feet to the ground.
Vegeta watched as they hit with a splat. "I coulda done that," he said.
Then Acoostik appeared, flying in a huge UFO. "Hey, guys, hop in! I took the keys to this baby from to poor dopes roaming around the streets who claimed that they were Homel;ess People, Devision 6. Anyway, let's head over to...
Freeza's headquarters...
"Take that! And that! Ha ha, I'll show you!" Zarbon cried as he crossed balloon swords with Ginyu. "I'll make you wish you were never born!!! Ha ha!!!"
All of Freeza's henchmen cheered on Zarbon, while the Clown-Ginyu Tokusentai cheered on their leader. It was going back and forth, back and forth, back, and forth, until....
A slight pause....
Freeza's henchmen whirled around to see what beast was making that horrible racket. The Ginyus, however, screamed in paing and clutched their ears in agony, and then with a loud pop they returned to their normal selves. Then, before the henchmen knew what had just happened, Acoostik and his friends flew the ship away.
Vegeta's house...
Everyone was there. All over the house, Z-senshi were partying. Yamcha, Tenshinhan and Chaotzu were putting on a play. Piccolo was breakdancing. Mr. Buu, Cell, Coola and King Cold were drinking wine and talking. The Sons were all sitting on the couch laughing at the comedy routine that Dr. Gero and the Androids were putting on. Vegeta's family were all listening toAcoostik play guitar. (Well, listening isn't quite the word, cringing is more like it.) And then, all the sudden....
A huge Changeling spaceship crashed through the roof. Freeza jumped out, his plasma cannon fully charged.
"Alright, you evil Namek-sei-jin! Come out! I'm here to... defeat.... you...." Freeza dropped his cannon and looked back at everyone who was staring at him.
"Um... did I miss something?"
The end
PrinceVegeta66: But wait! Don't you want to know what happended to our friends?!?
Freeza became extremely paranoid from that day on, blasting everything that he was served as a meal from someone. He eventually ended up in a mental institution known as GoGo's Sanitarium, which is why you'll never hear of such a place in existance.
Ecoostik became a mechanic, and is currently out of employment. He got his revenge, however, when he 'accidentally' put some curse gas in his ex-boss's air vents. The pore man ate himself out of house and home (literally) and died of indigestion.
Trunks and Bra joined the little league, but were thrown out because they tried to knock out the opponents with their bats.
Goten opened the Villain's Recovery Group, and has currently reformed over 500 villains into loving, caring people. His most notable success was when a woman who lived in the woods reported seeing Satin washing her windows. "It... it was red... and... it's tail was red... and it's face was red... and...."
Brolli has become a successful Pokemon Gym Leader, and has never lost a single match. This could, however, be due to the fact that whenever one of his Pokemon fainted he blew his opponent to pieces.
Zarbon joined a fencing class, and was last reported to be seen in a hospital with popped balloon plastered to the sword jutting into his chest.
The Ginyu Tokusentai became the world champions of Go Fish.
Kui opened a practical joke shop. He was last seen lying in an Arlington cemetary.
Acoostik went on a road tour with his guitar, and became a rich Namek-sei-jin. As he later said, "I'm the only singer ever who gets paid not to sing!" Unfortunately, he died a tragic death, eaten alive by wolverines.
Goku saved everybody.
And, of course, Vegeta became a chef, and is now known worldwide for his fabulous soup recipe.
*Credits begin to roll, accompanied by some really cruddy guitar music*
Written by ........................................................................................................... PrinceVegeta66
Original characters (most of them) by .................................................................... Akira Toriyama
Ecoostik by ..................................................................................................... Steve Golebiewski
Acoostik by ......................................................................................................... PrinceVegeta66
Original Freeza Beans concept by .................................................................... Steve Golebiewski
Vegeta Soup (C) somebody.
Written with permission from Steve the King of Clinically Unacceptable Fanfiction
This story is Good Wolverinekeeping approved
No wolverines were harmed in the making of this story
My brother was bitten by a wolverine once....
No really! He was carving his initials in the wolverine with an electric toothbrush givin to him by AAARRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHfhfhfgghghghhhh*choke*
