You know you're an otaku if...
I got bored. When I get bored (well, when either of us get bored, for that matter), weird things happen. This is one of those weird things.
I don't think it takes a rocket scientist to realize that we both are otaku...total anime fanatics. Being otaku, we decided to devise this little list. In the tradition of Jeff Foxworthy's "You might be a redneck if...", here's "You know you're an otaku if...!"
You know you're an otaku if...
Words like "Oro?" and "no da!" become a part of your daily vocabulary.
You're so used to fansubs that you complain corporate VHS and DVD releases "aren't blurry enough."
You bought a DVD player/VCR/LaserDisc player for the SOLE PURPOSE of collecting anime...
...You get bonus points if your DVD/VHS/LD collection is still nothing but anime.
You felt ripped off when September 13th, 2000 rolled around and the Second Impact never happened.
You're constantly at war with Trekkies over the rights to the local convention hall.
You have more J-Pop CD's than you have of your professed favorite musical genre/band.
The last person to call anime "cartoons" to your face walked away with a black eye...or worse.
The last time you fell asleep in class dreaming of food, the teacher woke you up and you nailed him/her with your desk. (think Fushigi Yuugi)
You spend all day wondering where Japan hides that huge-ass JSSDF force you always see in anime.
-Editor's Note: This could also apply to avid Godzilla fans as well.
You try to do your report on the American West about Vash the Stampede (even though Trigun does take place on another planet)...
...For that matter, you try to do your history report about the role of Hitokiri Battousai (Himura Kenshin) in the Meiji Revolution of Japan.
You were able to point out every edit in Outlaw Star's dub (I would say DBZ, but those are just too obvious).
You tried counting all the fetishes in a hentai video...and gave up when you reached triple digits.
You've ever gone SD...for real.
You believe that, in order to be the saviour of the universe, you must be a slacker and/or a terrible cook.
You broke up with your girlfriend/boyfriend because the relationship lacked fan service.
You have a thing for black cats with large eyes (crescent moon on forehead optional).
One of your rainy-day activities is translating manga.
No matter how good a dub is, you automatically hate it as soon as you see the anime subtitled (i.e. Neon Genesis Evangelion).
You try to hang yourself when your VCR eats your favorite fansub.
You get rich after making bets with DBZ dub fanboys over what will happen next in the show.
You get fangs when you yell at people.
You find yourself in an arguement about which is more powerful: Son Gokuu's KameHameHa or Lina Inverse's Dragu Slave.
You spend a whole day pondering which mech would win in a fight: Wing Gundam ZERO, RX-78 Gundam, Big O, Voltron, or EVA-01.
-Editor's Note: EVA all the way, baby!
You utterly confuse the hell out of every fanboy you know by calling anime and anime characters by their Japanese titles & names (i.e. Shin Tenchi Muyo! over Tenchi in Tokyo and TenShinHan over Tien).
You think Washyuu could whoop Dexter's ass in a battle of science.
You begin to wonder if Angels really do look like big blue sugar cubes and zebra-striped spheres.
You realize that Tamahome and Lina Inverse would be a very expensive team to hire.
You realize that with the appetites of Son Gokuu, Usagi, Miaka, & Ryoko, the whole rest of the world would starve to death.
You refuse to watch hentai because you're afraid to die of a nosebleed.
Since they're so much alike, you wonder what would happen if the cast of Big O met the cast of Batman: The Animated Series.
You consider the dubs produced by FUNimation, Saban, & DiC to be hate crimes against Japan...
...And you also consider anything related to FOX Kids to also be a hate crime against Japan.
You wonder why every single being in the anime universe -- alien or human -- has a blood type of either A, B, O, or AB.
You read (re-read?) the Bible/Koran/Torah for the sole purpose of finding all the religious references in Neon Genesis Evangelion.
You're still wondering where the whole "Gundam W boys are gay" thing came from.
You realize that Vash the Stampede & Mihoshi Kuramitsu would make the perfect couple.
You can name two or more creations by Akira Toriyama, Hideaki Anno, Kajishima Masaki, Masamune Shirow, & Naoko Takuechi.
You're convinced that Vegeta & Hiei were separated at birth.
You wonder what would've happened if we had got to see Nobuyuki's fantasy world in Tenchi Muyo! TV's Time & Space Adventures...
...And you're afraid you'd have died of a nosebleed if you saw it.
You thought South Park's "Chinpokomon" episode was the funniest damn thing you ever saw.
You got an "A" in history class on a test over Japan's Meiji Era by watching the Rurouni Kenshin OVA's.
Does the name Hayashibara Megumi ring any sort of bell?
You aspire to grow a cherry blossom garden in your back yard.
You plan to storm ADVision's headquarters if they don't get the bonus footage from Neon Genesis Evangelion episodes 20-23.
-Editor's Note: Oh no, I've said too much! Abort! Abort! O_O
You have an obsessive love of Pocky! ^_^;;;
You try to join Wolfwood's church.
You watch a dub just to "MST3K" it.
You aspire to create a cult for Kuroneko-Sama.
You familiar with Studio CLAMP? 'NUFF SAID!
You get disoriented trying to read an American comic book from right to left.
You've taken the time to translate an anime song into English so that the lyrics fit the tune.
All your base are belong to us!
Anything we might've missed? Feel free to E-Mail us additions to "You know you might be an otaku if..." and if we think it's funny, we'll be sure to post it!
Submit your idea to Minky!!!
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