"I have always loved you, Master Kunzite."

Tears streamed down Zoisite's cheeks as he said those words. His world was growing dark, and there was so much he wanted to say, so many kisses he wished to give the strong, stoic man embracing him. He wanted to die beautifully, and he got his wish. Zoisite felt happy, yet sad that Master Kunzite would be alone. Kunzite never shed a tear, rarely showed any emotion. He could be so cold at times, yet so warm and loving in private. Now, as the soft petals fell lightly against his face, Zoisite could feel Kunzite holding him closer, telling him he sorry.

Don't be, Zoisite thought, Let me cry for you.

He was falling into darkness, into silence. For hours, Zoisite fell and was sure he would die from that, but when he finally reached the bottom of the abyss, he was still whole.

"Kunzite," he whispered, "Please don't forget me... please."

* * * * * * * *

The former Dark Kingdom lord waited for a long time, and wondered if there were any other souls in this realm, perhaps Nephrite, or the citizens of the Earth or Moon Kingdoms. This realm was completely empty, however – no light, no food or water, and no sleep or death.

Zoisite could feel himself grow hungry, thirsty and weary. He couldn't see his own hands, or his beautiful face. Had it grown ugly? Where was Kunzite? Where were the other souls and fallen Youma?

"Kunzite! Nephrite!" he cried out, longing for anyone to talk to.

His only answer was the ever-present silence.

"Please... please Kunzite... can you hear me?," he whimpered, imagining Kunzite chiding him for breaking so easily.

Was this a test? Or was this... hell?

The former lord reflected on his last encounter with the dying Nephrite, how the auburn-haired lord had fallen for an Earth-girl. Where was he now? Was he in another hell, or was he in Heaven? If only Nephrite could be there with him, even Nephrite his adversary.

Yet there Zoisite sat, weeping as hunger gnawed at his belly, the thirst dried up his tears before they could fall, and the stench of his filth and sweat filled the air. Most of all, he wept at the thought of his Master, the gentle stoic. He would give anything to feel those arms around him again.

So tired. There was no way to tell how many days he had spent in that place, no sun or moon, no visitors – just darkness and silence aside from his sobs.

"Somebody please help me!" Zoisite screamed.

Shaking from exhaustion, hunger and thirst, and from the oppressive loneliness, Zoisite lost his composure completely and began to bawl like a child. It was then that he noticed a soft, white light. Someone cradled him the way Kunzite had in his final moments, and kissed him on the forehead. Something was pressed against his lips, and water – cool, delicious water – flowed into his parched mouth.

"Drink slowly," a woman's voice whispered.

Whoever it was, Zoisite didn't care. Someone had come, or maybe he was hallucinating, going crazy like Jadeite due to the curse Beryl had placed upon him. He felt himself being rocked, and fell asleep in his rescuer's arms.

* * * * * * * *

Waking up, the former dark lord found himself lying in a bed in a small bedroom. It had no windows, but a single door. Sitting beside the bed was a woman with platinum blond hair in a familiar odango style. She smoothed the fringe of Zoisite's hair, and he sighed at that gentle touch.

"Zoisite," the woman said, "You have escaped your hell."

"Hell," Zoisite croaked, his throat still raw from crying.

"Shh," the woman whispered, tilting Zoisite's body to a sitting position, "I will care for you."

"Am I... ugly?" Zoisite asked, thinking in horror about how long he had been in that dark place.

The woman did not answer; instead, she took something from a nightstand by the bed. It was a metal tray with a ceramic cup and bowl, and a metal spoon. She placed the tray on Zoisite's lap, and then sat back down in her chair.

Whatever it was, the broth smelled heavenly. It had been so long since Zoisite had eaten, so he took a spoonful, then drank greedily from the bowl. His stomach was still growling, yet that little nourishment somehow made him feel better. Still, something bothered the former dark lord.

"Am I ugly?" he repeated, desperate to know.

"Beauty is more than a fair face and lovely hair," the woman replied, "But you had such a dark, ugly heart before you died."

Her words stung, yet Zoisite felt too weak and broken to answer in kind.

"Then... why did you rescue me?"

"Because you asked... and because there is some light and beauty in your heart."

"Where?"

"You will find it if you look," the woman replied, taking the tray and setting it back onto the nightstand.

She wrapped an arm around Zoisite and lifted him to his feet, walking him over to a small bathtub. For the first time, the former dark lord noticed he was dressed in a plain white linen nightshirt, and the band that tied his hair had been removed, letting it flow freely down his back. The woman sat Zoisite down on a wooden chair by the tub, and helped him out of his clothes. He sat there naked while she drew the bath and poured in some hot water from a brass kettle.

The woman then gently took Zoisite by the arm and helped him into the tub. After suffering in hell for so long, Zoisite welcomed the soothing bath. Something about this place put him entirely at ease, and even if it was a trick, even if he was going mad, it was still a welcome dream.

"Why are you doing this for me?" he asked.

"Because I forgive you," she replied, "And you wanted to escape, to have another chance."

The moon woman poured some warm water down Zoisite's head and back, and then let him enjoy his bath for awhile.

"Am I ugly?" he asked again.

This time, the woman showed Zoisite a mirror. He stared at the reflection, showing a gaunt, pale face with sunken eyes.

At this, he began to weep. The woman helped Zoisite out of the tub, and into a fuzzy robe, then walked him back to the bed. His legs were weak and unsteady from all that time spent in hell, and he was emaciated and sick from malnutrition.

"I couldn't help you," the woman explained, "Until you wanted to leave, until you cried out for someone to help. You had to be humbled."

"I'm ugly... I'm so ugly."

"You think you're ugly?" the woman asked, tucking a patchwork quilt over the broken young man, "Kunzite would disagree... even now, he is thinking of you on his way to the dark place."

Hearing those words, Zoisite sat up and grabbed the moon woman's arms, a look of sheer horror on his face.

"Please rescue him!" he cried, "Please don't let my Master Kunzite suffer!"

"I can't help him right now," the moon woman replied, shaking her head sadly, "He has to be broken enough to willingly accept my help."

"Just help him! Bring him here or somewhere else... any place but there!"

"Kunzite was so bound by duty, that he didn't even save you from Beryl," the woman noted, "Do you hate him?"

"I don't hate him," Zoisite sobbed, "I don't blame him at all! It was those senshi!"

"My daughter and the princesses of the inner planets."

"Who are you?" Zoisite asked.

"I am Queen Serenity. You and the rest of the Dark Kingdom destroyed the Silver Millennium... you killed me and my daughter, and Prince Endymion, whom you had sworn to protect."

The former dark lord could not believe his ears.

"He was our enemy! How could I swear to protect our enemy?"

"Let me show you," Serenity said, touching Zoisite's forehead.

Suddenly, Zoisite remembered everything, swearing an oath to protect Endymion, bowing before him with the rest of the generals, the growing distrust between the Earth and Moon Kingdoms, war, destruction, deaths of millions including those who used to be friends. Then, everything seemed to explode, and he was reborn in the present era, again falling prey to Beryl and trying to help her reawaken Metallia. He killed Endymion. He had broken a promise.

The memories and realization of what he had done was such a shock that Zoisite fainted into Serenity's arms. When he awoke, Serenity was bathing him with a sponge in a shallow bath.

"I am... ugly," he murmured, his heart sinking so deep that he couldn't even cry now.

"No," Serenity whispered, kissing his forehead, "You are not ugly."

"I deserve that dark place more than this."

"I have forgiven and rescued you, Zoisite. You have had my forgiveness even after my kingdom was destroyed, but you had to ask for help and then repent. When you first fell into that dark place, you would not have done so."

"I still... feel ugly."

* * * * * * * *

For what seemed like an eternity, Zoisite stayed in the room and ate the humble, yet impossibly-delicious food Serenity gave him – including fresh bread, milk, vegetables, fruits and other simple dishes. Why would a queen cook for someone who helped destroy her world?

He was having an easier time walking now, which meant privacy while bathing and attending to other needs. There wasn't much else to do, but Serenity was almost always by his side, someone he could talk with, someone he could trust.

At the moment, Zoisite was lying in the bed, amusing himself by playing an imaginary piano. There was a song in his head, an image of a black cherry tree, of Kunzite standing solemnly in a shower of cherry blossom petals. He wanted to go back to Earth, but knew that Kunzite would not be there with him.

Just then, Serenity walked into the room, carrying the chamber pot she had been cleaning. Zoisite had offered to clean it himself – a rather unpleasant task to be sure – but she insisted that he rest.

"Serenity," Zoisite said, "I wish to go back to Earth now."

"And you will," she replied, setting the pot down, "But you must understand, that to be returned to Earth in your current form, you must pay a toll."

Zoisite nodded.

"What will this toll be?"

Serenity walked over to his bed and bent down, placing her hand on his chest. The hand sunk beneath his skin, through his ribs, and an ill feeling overcame Zoisite. The queen moved her hand lower, down to Zoisite's abdomen, which made his intestines churn.

"This?" he managed, swallowing back the contents of his stomach which were threatening to push their way into his mouth.

Serenity nodded sadly.

"When you arrive, something horrible will happen," she whispered, "But it isn't part of the toll, nor is it your fault. Some things just happen, and nobody can control them."

Zoisite nodded, feeling very weak and tired. Serenity withdrew her hand from inside the former earth lord, and took him in her arms.

"You, like the other three lords of earth, have a star seed, just as Prince Endymion has. You will soon be able to use it."

"Star seed?" Zoisite whispered, barely able to keep his eyes open.

"Yes, and your mission is to find Jadeite and help free him, and bring light to this world."

Serenity conjured a green zinnia, which she tucked into the Earth lord's nightshirt. Lifting Zoisite off the bed, she walked toward the door, opening it up to a room filled with bright light and the scent of wildflowers. As she did, the queen began to sing an ancient lullaby, and Zoisite gave in to the wave of fatigue.

* * * * * * * *

Jeering voices woke Zoisite from his dream. At first, he could not understand what they were saying, but his body was aching all over. Something hard slammed against his back several times.

"Wh-what?" he grunted, before being silenced by another blow.

Turning around and opening his eyes, he gasped at the sight of three shadowy figures wielding various blunt weapons. The terrified man tried to get to his feet, but someone grabbed him by the arms and lifted him up roughly. No matter how he struggled, Zoisite could not escape.

"So, ya gonna pay up or what?" a man carrying a crowbar sneered.

"What-what do you mean?" Zoisite gasped.

"You know exactly what I mean!" the man laughed, swinging his weapon at Zoisite and hitting him in the pelvis.

Zoisite screamed in agony, a scream answered by several more blows. Why were they doing this? Was this the 'great pain' Serenity had mentioned?

"GIVE US YER MONEY ARSE BANDIT!" another yelled, "GIVE IT NOW!"

There was nothing he could do. Even with his powers, Zoisite was better at agility than brute strength. He was helpless against the assault, and could only scream for help while enduring the beating. Why did Serenity let this happen?

Zoisite felt something running across his stomach, and then something wet. Had he pissed himself? Everything began to spin, and the Earth lord felt like he was dying all over again – this time alone.

Zoisite managed to whisper, "Kunzite..." as the darkness closed in on him again.

* * * * * * * *

He awoke in a white room that smelled of medicine. His body ached but also felt a little numb, and everything was hazy like in a dream. Some people were talking to him, but Zoisite didn't understand most of what they were saying. He couldn't speak very well either, as something was holding his jaws together.

After several days spent in that state, Zoisite started regaining some lucidity. He had been mugged and beaten, and several bones had been broken. Not only that, but he had been stabbed a few times, and his intestines had to be repaired. He was lucky to be alive, according to the doctor. A police officer had found him, and called an ambulance.

Weeks passed and the wires were removed from Zoisite's jaws, though he still had to wear a cast on his left leg, and would use a colostomy bag until his intestines were fully-healed. The stitches, however, would leave behind permanent scars.

Zoisite – or Adrian Kirsch, the name on his ID card – was a pianist who had fallen on hard times. Health problems, including a heart condition and juvenile diabetes, should by all rights have killed him, yet he survived. He was even tested for HIV due to his emaciated body, but luckily the results were negative.

* * * * * * * *

Finally, Zoisite – Adrian Kirsch – was released from the hospital and his rescuer drove him to his house.

"Are you feeling alright?" the man asked as they parked at the kerb.

"I'm feeling fine right now," Adrian replied, yawning a little.

"My wife is fixing dinner," the man said, "Just make yourself at home, and I'll help you with your things. Oh – and our daughter has been wanting to meet you."

The house was modestly furnished, and after Adrian was settled in, he went to the parlour to find a simple wooden piano. Sitting down and leaning his crutch against the wall, he played a few notes, then started playing the song that had been in his head during that stay in the other realm.

"Whatcha playin'?"

Turning around, Adrian saw a little girl who looked looked like she had just gotten back in from playing in the dirt, and gave a soft, somewhat arrogant smile.

"Just a song I wrote," he chuckled, "Do you play the piano?"

"A little," the girl replied, climbing up onto the bench beside him, "But not as good as you."

"Heh," a smug Adrian snorted, "You'll learn."

The two played until dinner was ready, and Adrian made sure to check his blood sugar while the girl's parents tried to persuade her to wash her face. It was a nuisance, but unavoidable now. He would have to make it a routine. After taking some pills, he lounged for awhile on his bed, pondering all the events.

"Try to lay low," Serenity's voice warned, "Until the Northern Sky is brightened at night in three moons."

Adrian nodded, then felt someone place something in his hand. He wrapped his fingers around a stem, and looked to see a glowing green zinnia. Knowing that he would need it in the future, Adrian tucked it away in his shirt. Then he turned on a radio to listen to the news.

Most of the local reports had to do with his attackers, who were awaiting trial, but some news from Japan caught his ears. Some of them were about some strange monsters and aliens, and then there was some kind of organization which called itself 'The Happy Hub'. Many were joining, looking for enlightenment. Adrian wondered if the Senshi would ever accept him as a friend, after what he had done.

That night, Adrian slept restlessly, plagued by nightmares of the attack. He would have to see a counselor about it, but doubted anyone would understand. His beautiful body was forever marred with scars from the stabbing. What would Kunzite think of him?

* * * * * * * *

Several more months passed, and he was soon healthy enough to hold some concerts and even record an album. The money he received from these ventures was enough to start paying rent – something Adrian wanted to do out of gratitude. Of course by now he was able to walk out in public, as the sky had lit up.

Adrian knew he would have to go back to Japan – and soon. Something was very wrong, something hiding even from Sailor Moon. He needed to find out what it was, but it wasn't time yet.

"Wait," Serenity's voice told him, "Wait until you hear word of a Pegasus in Tokyo."

Adrian nodded, thinking more about all the recent events. He felt so full of joy, yet still incomplete. Would his beloved Kunzite still love him after seeing all his scars? Adrian was even afraid to look at them, and often bathed and dressed in the dark. He felt so ashamed for being unable to stop those men, despite his frail body. Yet the Earth lord also felt as though he deserved it for his past deeds.

"Master Kunzite," he whispered as he looked out the window by his bed, "Would you still love me?

Adrian decided to take a walk down the streets while the couple he was boarding with were shopping and their daughter was in school. As he approached one of the local grocery stores, Adrian stopped to rest. His heart condition and diabetes made walking long distances very tiring, and at times annoying. Suddenly he heard people screaming, and with some hesitation, went to investigate.

Three men were robbing the store and holding several employees and customers – including the couple who let him stay at their place – at gunpoint. Even though he was afraid to act, Adrian knew he had to. Queen Serenity had commanded him to bring light to the world, and though she would possibly forgive him for running away frightened, the Earth lord knew he wouldn't be able to forgive himself if his benefactors were to die.

However, first he would need to hide, as some people were gathering around the shop. Ducking in an alley, Adrian took the zinnia out of his shirt and with the sharp end of the stem pricked a finger on his left hand. A thin stream of green light came out of the small wound and enveloped him, becoming a green-trimmed tuxedo.

Feeling energized from the transformation, Tuxedo Zoisite ran into the building and threw several well-aimed green zinnias at the robbers, blinding them.

"Who's there?" demanded the one guarding the hostages.

"The magnificently beautiful Tuxedo Zoisite," the Earth lord replied, running over to him and snatching the gun out of his hand, "And I might be mistaken, but this is not a toy, is it?"

He held the gun against the man's head.

"Am I right?" Tuxedo Zoisite asked, cocking it for effect.

"Y-y-you're insane!" the man blubbered.

"Maybe I am," Tuxedo Zoisite chuckled, "But I'm not the one pissing my pants, am I?"

He turned to see the other two brushing the petals off their faces, and decided to use his old powers against them.

"Zoi!" he shouted, sending a barrage of cherry blossom petal daggers at the other two.

The frightened – and now bleeding – men dropped their guns and ran out of the store and into the hands of the police. Tuxedo Zoisite decided to head out the back way, avoiding the puddle one of the robbers left. Outside, he detransformed and felt weak again. It was mildly disheartening, but after all, the illness was part of his toll. Besides, Adrian thought as he walked over to see the men being hauled to jail, at least they would never suspect the weak, frail Adrian.

* * * * * * * *

Over the next few months, Adrian occasionally foiled crimes, sometimes helping the police catch kidnappers and terrorists. He had grown to love his new home, but still, a part of him was incomplete. He needed to be with Kunzite, his beloved.

"Be ready," Serenity told him one night, "The time is drawing near. Pack up your things and be ready to move to Japan."

"Will I have everything that I need to stay there?" he wondered.

"Of course you will," Serenity replied, "You can make your own official records and alter memories just as Neprhite and Jadeite had done."

"That's a relief," Adrian chuckled, "But will the Senshi accept me?"

"It will take time, but they will eventually accept you."

Adrian nodded, and continued to listen for reports of the pegasus. Two weeks later, as he was watching TV with the people he had come to consider his family, a news report describing a pegasus flying over Tokyo startled him. It was quite saddening, but Adrian knew it was time. Three days later, he said his goodbyes, and promised to write and call them.

There was an invitation to live and perform in Tokyo, and Adrian had to take this opportunity. He also would finally be reunited with another dear family member after being away for so long.