JD: And their human counterparts will cheer for them from the stands. Let's bring them out.
Ash walks into the arena, followed by Tai, Genki, and Sakura.
Ash: (Pulling out his Pokeballs) Pikachu, I choose you!
In a bright flash, a demon-like rat pops out of the Pokeball.
Pikachu: Pikachu!
JD: Our contestants for this match are as follows: Pikachu of Pokemon, Agumon of Digimon, Suezo from Monster Rancher, and Kiro from Cardcaptors. Each contestant is preparing for battle.
Pikachu practices shocking a stuffed dummy. Agumon shoots fireballs at another one. Suezo continuously licks his. And Kiro ummmm...... flies in circles. A chocobo walks out to the center of the arena.
Chocobo: Wark! (Translated, this means, "Let's get it on!")
Pikachu imediately flies at Suezo. Suezo teleports out of the way, and Pikachu hits the steel wall. Meanwhile, Agumon is heavily damaging Kiro.
Olikrom: Why in the world are all these mascots YELLOW?
JD: Couldn't tell ya.
Out of nowhere, Agumon summons a blast of fire and launches it at Kiro. Seeing as to how Kiro is a stuffed animal, the blast scorches him.
Kiro: You can't kill me! I'm the guardian of...
His words trail off as he becomes nothing more than a memory.
Olikrom: The crowd is going WILD!
Crowd: (Bored) Yay....
Agumon: That's one down. Pepper Breath!
Another fireball is aimed toward Suezo. He takes the hit completely. His long tongue is left dangling out.
Pikachu: PIKA!!!!!
Pikachu hurls a bolt of electricity at the long tongue of Suezo's. His one eye bulges out of his head.
Suezo: Telepo-
BOOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!!! The impact hits Suezo on his drooling tongue. Instantly, Suezo begins transforming.
Agumon: What's going on?
JD: Suezo has become a lost disk.
Agumon: I don't know what that is. But that Pikachu thing looks tough. Get Tai to help me digivolve.
Outside the ring, Tai and Ash are tearing each other apart. Genki and Sakura are in a cage, because their team has lost. Tai pulls out his digivice, and tosses it to Agumon. Instantly, Agumon begins to digivolve.
Greymon: That's better.
Olikrom: What's this? Pikachu is doing some evolving of his own!
JD: (sarcastically) Oh yeah, I'm sure Raichu could beat a 50 foot dinosaur.
However, this is no ordinary transformation. Metal spikes pop out of Pikachu. Armored plates surround his body. He has become a true freak of nature.
Olikrom: Hey, wait a second, I read about this Magic-Pokemon crossbreed in an issue of InQuest Gamer!
Ash and Tai stop dead in their tracks. Ash pulls out his Pokedex. Tai grabs his D-Terminal.
Pokedex: Phyrexian Pikachu - The unknown Pokemon. He was created in a parody about Pokemon, but was claimed to have been destroyed.
D-Terminal: Unknown digimon. Does not end with "mon".
Ash: Wow! My very own Phyrexian Pikachu! Wait until Gary sees this!
Ash runs to give the freak a hug, only to become impaled on the spikes.This part should have been censored.
Olikrom: I think I'm gonna be sick...(retching)
JD: Our sponsors aren't going to be pleased.
Greymon: I gotta fight THAT? Time to digivolve again!
Greymon becomes his own metal form, MetalGreymon. MetalGreymon and Phyrexian Pikachu tie up. When suddenly, two all-too-familiar voices are heard.
Voices: Prepare for trouble! Make it double! To protect the world from devastation! To unite all peoples within our nation! To denounce the evils of truth and love! To extend our reach to the stars above! Jesse! James! Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light! Surrender now, or prepare to fight! Meowth, that's right!
Team Rocket. Phyrexian Pikachu hurls a lightning bolt at Meowth. Meowth becomes the first kitty lightning rod. Hopefully the last.
Jessie and James: YOU CAN KEEP THAT STUPID PIKACHU!!! (They both run off screaming)
Before they could reach the newly installed doors, Pikachu launched a thunderbolt at them. Upon impact, they were somehow launched into space as usual.
Jessie and James: Looks like team Rocket's blasting off again!
The two surviving members of Team Rocket arched, and began falling down again. They both hit the ground with a large THUD. When the dust settled, the imprints of Jessie and James were imbedded on the ground.
Olikrom: (Continuing their motto) ...only this time for good.
Phyrexian Pikachu turns his attention toward MetalGreymon, who has been charging his laser the whole time. MetalGreymon unleashes the energy from it, and Phyrexian Pikachu is thrown into the stands. Rows A and B were completely destroyed.
Olikrom: I smell a lawsuit.
JD: It's worth it.
Phyrexian Pikachu sends an electric current flying MetalGreymon's way. MetalGreymon didn't see it coming. The blast disarmed his laser, so he yells out the name of the only real attack he knows, proud and true.
MetalGreymon: GIGA BLASTER!
Phyrexian Pikachu: Pika?
The impact sends Phyrexian Pikachu's metallic foot hudling off into space.
MetalGreymon: We finish this now! MetalGreymon, Mega digivolve to WarGreymon!
Like a puppy, Phyrexian Pikachu begins to whimper. He knows he is going to die. But there is nothing he can do. WarGreymon was gathering energy faster than he could say "Pikachu". He suddenly returns to his normal form, but his foot was still missing.
WarGreymon: I...can't...kill...it...It's...too...cute...
Olikrom: (trying to end the match) So let him go already!
WarGreymon: Then what do I do with this?
He was refering to the giant mass of energy he held in his hands. Before anyone could respond, WarGreymon tossed the sphere into the air, forgetting the scientific law, "What goes up, must come down", much like Team Rocket.
Olikrom: RUN!!!!!!!!
In slow motion fashion, Olikrom and JD ran to the Exit, and jumped out just as the whole stadium blew up. Olikrom, engulfed in flames, landed about twenty feet further than JD. He put himself out with an Ice attack he knew.
***Several hours later***
Olikrom: Just imagine if every battle ended like this.
JD: Let's search the remains for a winner. Something had to have survived.
They both looked around, but nothing moved. JD tossed aside a boulder (The one that used to be the commentator's booth) and saw a lone Digi-egg.
JD: I guess this means that Agumon is the winner.
Olikrom: Forget him. Let's take this home and cook it.
JD: This is Agu-Oh, forget it. By the way, what do we do about the stadium?
Olikrom: This is a story. We can have another one built by the next battle.
The two walk off, laughing all the way.
