Interview #3- Officer Jenny and Nurse Joy 

A/N: Anne owns herself; Angie and I own ourselves; everybody else is Nintendo property.

(Angel, Anne, and Silver are in the interview room with Officer Jenny.)

Silver: Well, I’d like to “welcome” (makes those little quotation marks with her fingers) you to the Adams Sisters Interviews. I’m Silver, this is Angel (gestures to Angie), and this is our guest interviewer, our sister Anne!

Angel: She’s another member of our evil, twisted family.

Anne: Angel, you shouldn’t mention that in front of a fed…

(Angel and Silver look at Jenny skeptically.)

Angel: Oh, yeah. A cop in a miniskirt.

Silver: (sarcastically) We’re REAL scared.

Anne: (panicking) Why do I smell Growlithe?

Silver: (suspiciously) You better not have BROUGHT one.

Jenny: It’s my clothes, I guess. I didn’t bring one.

(The door opens and Nurse Joy enters. Angel lets out a cry of fear and runs into a corner, assuming the “scared hedgehog” position.)

Anne: (angrily) Why are you LATE?

Silver: (menacingly) If you’re late to a Adams Sisters Interview, it may be the last thing you do.

Joy: I’m sorry! There was a Pokemon emergency!

Silver: That is SO cliché.

Joy: (looks at Angel worriedly) Is something wrong?

Anne: She’s mortally afraid of Nurse Joys. That’s why she never goes to Pokemon Centers. She always uses Potions and stuff instead.

Silver: So sit way over there, Joy. (indicates a chair in the corner across from Angel)

(Joy takes a seat and Angel climbs back into her chair.)

Silver: Ok, so here’s the deal, Joy. We have only one question for you. After that, you’re background. You’re just here to keep people from saying “Oh, now go interview Nurse Joy.” Honestly, we couldn’t care less about you.

Anne: So, “Nurse” (makes quotation marks with her fingers) Joy, why is it that you treat all Pokemon like gods and give them all the TLC you’ve got, but you treat Brock like scum?

Nurse Joy: Because he’s an annoying SOB.

Angel: SHE wasn’t the one who actually went out with him…(muttering) goddamn half-eyed skirt chaser…

Jenny and Joy: You went out with him?

Silver: Long story.

Angel: Yeah, and then I dumped him because he couldn’t stop looking at other girls!

Anne: He’s still cute!

Angel: If he ever comes near me again I’m gonna rip his squinty little eyes out of his spiky head and shove them down his pants where his brains are!

Anne: (hastily) The next question is for Jenny. Joy, we’re done with you, so shut up and sit in the corner.

Joy: I AM in the corner.

Silver: Mouth shut, Joy.

Anne: Officer Jenny, you never arrive at the scene of the crime on time. You never make any arrests and you don’t seem to care much about catching the bad guys or actually DOING your JOB. Why is it that everyone respects you and men adore you?

Jenny: I ride a motorcycle in a miniskirt. Of course men love me. And the universal respect comes from being a cop.

Silver: (reaches behind chair and pulls out shotgun) Respect this!

Anne: Um, Silv, there’s a pig in the room…

Silver: (waves gun in the air) Point being?

Joy: That’s dangerous! You’re scaring me!

Silver: (levels gun at Joy) Shut up. You’re background, remember? As quiet and inanimate as the chair you’re on…and if you piss me off I can arrange for that to be permanent…(waves gun threateningly)

Anne: Silver, put the gun down. They aren’t going to do a thing.

(Silver bends to put the gun away, but the door bursts open. Silver raises her shotgun and points it at the intruder, who throws his hands out in front of him.)

Brock: Don’t shoot!

Angel: Brock!

Brock: Angel! (sees Joy and Jenny) Nurse Joy! Officer Jenny!

(Brock runs over and throws himself at Joy’s feet. She tries to edge her chair away, but he grabs her hand.)

Joy: What do YOU want?

Brock: Only you, fair Nurse Joy! Heal the wounds on my broken heart!

Angel: (angrily) Brock, what do you think you’re doing?

Brock: You’re the ex, I don’t care what you think anymore!

Angel: Brock, Nurse Joy thinks you’re a worthless SOB (takes out daggers)-and so do I! (throws one at Brock, who ducks and screams girlishly)

Joy: I don’t think he’s a worthless SOB, I think he’s an annoying SOB!

Jenny: Ok, that’s it! You and the rest of your sick, soulless family are under arrest!

Silver: (points gun at Jenny) I would love to see you try.

Brock: Thank you, Jenny! You really DO care!

Jenny: Damn right I care- about me! Now drop the weapons!

Anne: Oh, crap, run for it!

(Silver, Anne, and Angel run out of the room with Jenny in pursuit. Anne throws a chair at Jenny, who trips over it.)

Jenny: Stop! (gets up and runs after them)

Brock: Well, Joy, we’re alone…

Joy: (panicking) Help! Don’t leave me here with HIM!