Interview #4.5- Todd, Richie, and Tracey Rescheduled. 

Disclaimer: Still just own us and our crazy not-so-little family. Thanks to the Angus Sisters, who we hope won’t sue us for claiming that we’re related and having them and their sibs guest. We seem to pray that people don’t sue us a lot, don’t we?

(Angel is waiting in the interview room, as she and Silver have decided to try interviewing Todd, Richie, and Tracey again. The door opens and Silver enters, dragging a rope behind her and pulling a squirming Tracey by the ear. Todd and Richie are tied to the rope.)

Silver: Damn, what do you guys EAT? You’re freaking FAT!

Todd: I’m not fat!

Richie: Untie us!

Tracey: I’m losing circulation! I can’t feel my ear!

Silver: And you’ll be in a lot more pain if you don’t stop struggling and shut the hell up!

(Silver closes the door, locks it, and unties the boys. She takes her seat next to Angel.)

Angel: Now do you have any idea how pissed off we are? You stood us up, you assholes! Now sit down!

(Tracey, Todd, and Richie sit down apprehensively.)

Silver: So what happened? Did you get lost or something?

Angel: Alien abduction, perhaps?

Tracey: Actually, we went to the Pokemon Center

Richie: And we told Nurse Joy about this…

Todd: And she told us not to come because you’d try to murder the three of us…

Angel: Silv, I think Nurse Joy has more brains than we give her credit for.

Silver: But these two obviously DON'T! Never make an Adams MAD! Couldn’t you have CALLED to tell us you couldn’t make it? Faked sick? Faked LOST? Sent a freakin’ TELEGRAM, for God’s sake? Let us KNOW, instead of leaving us to wait? We shot bullets through notecards and threw daggers at the walls!

Tracey: B-Bullets?

Richie: D-Daggers?

(All three boys shiver nervously.)

Todd, Richie, and Tracey: (look as pitiful as they can) We’re sorry! We’ll never do it again! Please don’t kill us!

Angel: You BETTER be sorry! And you’re damn right you won’t do it again! But cooperate and we won’t kill you…

Silver: TOO painfully…

(Silver and Angel snicker evilly)

Tracey: We’re sorry, really! It wasn’t nice of us and we’ll never do it again! We promise!

Angel: Think they’re sincere, Silv?

Silver: (indifferently) Not really. But we have to finish the interview before we kill them anyway.

Todd: No! Don’t kill us! We’ll do anything!

Angel: (gets an evil look in her eye) ANYTHING?

Tracey, Richie, and Todd: Yes! ANYTHING!

Angel: Good! Take a picture of us, Todd!

Todd: But I only photograph Pokemon…

Silver: (reaches behind her chair and pulls out her shotgun) Photograph this, Snaps!

Todd: My name is Todd!

Angel: Snaps sounds better.

Tracey: I agree.

Angel: (pulls out dagger and waves it toward Tracey) No one gives a damn about your opinion. Now, Snaps…

Todd: But I…

Angel: Are you really going to DENY an ADAMS request? It’s not healthy, you know.

Silver: (fixing her hair) Do we REALLY want this picture taken? Next time we see it could be on a wanted poster…

Angel: Then we change our hairstyles and outfits and nobody’s any wiser.

Silver: Yeah, anime is great that way. We can just keep changing our outfits and stuff and never get arrested.

Todd: (tentatively) Um, is it true that Officer Jenny arrested you and one of your sisters during an interview?

Silver and Angel: (roaring) DON’T YOU DARE MENTION THAT EVER AGAIN!

Angel: Now shut up and take the goddamn picture!

(The Adams sisters pose and Todd aims the camera. He looks through the viewfinder.)

Todd: Say cheese!

Silver and Angel: DIE, BRAT!

(They smile innocently as Todd takes their picture.)

Tracey: I don’t wanna be here anymore.

Silver: Our interviewees never want to be here after about the first five minutes. It’s practically our trademark. We always chase them out! (She laughs evilly)

Angel: …Or get chased out, like with Officer Jenny…

Silver: Thought you didn’t like mentioning that.

Angel: So Richie, do you have any relatives named Ash?

Richie: No, why do you ask?

Silver: It’s creepy! You look like you could be his clone; there’s gotta be a message there!

Angel: Yeah, you have the same fashion sense, hairstyle, taste in hats…

Silver: …the same damn annoying Z’s under your eyes, same corny smile, same blank look occupying your face…it’s freaking me out!

Todd: YOU’RE freaking me out!

Silver: Now, Todd and Richie, you two seem to have a reputation of standing up your interviewers. First our dear cousins, then us!

Richie: Cousins? But we only stood up the Angus Sisters…

Silver: (smiles) I know.

Todd: Aagh! You’re RELATED to THEM!

Angel: Damn straight.

Richie: (thoughtfully) It makes sense…they act like them, they have the same sort of screwed up family, they conduct interviews the same way, Silver has the same hair colors as Gypsy and Nikita, they have the same tendency towards violence…

Angel: You insulted our family!

Silver: (pulls out shotgun) You’re gonna pay for that!

(Silver shoots the wall next to Todd’s head as Angel throws a dagger at Richie. Tracey watches intently, sketching the scene.)

Angel: Oh, crap. We can’t kill Richie and Todd yet.

Silver: Oh, yeah. I forgot.

Tracey: Why not?

Silver: We’re waiting for a couple people before we extract our revenge.

Richie: Who?

Silver: Gypsy and Nikita.

Todd, Tracey, and Richie: AAAAUUUGH!

Silver: We have to kill Tracey, too. That we can do now.

Tracey: (nervously) W-Why me?

Angel: Because someone wrote your name down on our family’s hitlist.

Silver: Plus we were paid in advance.

(Silver raises her gun. Tracey runs to the door, unlocks it, and runs out. Moments later, a scream is heard. Two teenage girls with black and purple hair walk in, shutting and locking the door behind them. They run over and embrace Silver and Angel.)

Silver: Gypsy! Nikita! How are you?

Nikita: (gestures to door) What was that about?

Gypsy: We’re fine, by the way.

Angel: We were gonna kill him, but then he ran for it. We’ll have to catch up to him later.

(Silver lowers her gun and puts it away.)

Gypsy: You’ve been practicing your aim?

Angel: She’s as good as you, and my dagger throwing is as good as Niki’s!

(Todd and Richie tremble in fear.)

Gypsy: (spots them) You! You stood us AND our cousins up! And now (she takes out her shotgun) you’re gonna pay for it!

Todd: (desperately) Want me to take another picture of you?

Gypsy, Nikita, Silver, and Angel: NO!

(The door opens and Gypsy and Nikita’s brother Jeff runs in, with little sister A.J. close behind.)

Silver: We only invited Gypsy and Nikita! Jeff, A.J., what are you doing here? We’re interviewing them!

Jeff: I came to kill Richie because he beat me!

A.J.: I get to tape him up and smother him!

(August and Vicki Adams rush into the room.)

August: I’m gonna kill you, Richie! You’re gonna pay for beating me!

Vicki: I get to tape him up and smother him!

A.J.: Hey! That’s MY job! I’m getting 35% for this!

(A purple-haired girl bursts into the room through the open door.)

Gypsy: JANE! What are you doing here?

Jane: Trying to keep the killers out of here so you can finish the interview!

Silver, Angel, Gypsy, Nikita, August, Vicki, Jeff, and A.J.: Which killers?

Jane: Jeff and A.J.!

(Richie and Todd, seeing their opportunity, rush out the door. August, Vicki, A.J. and Jeff give chase as Jane follows them, leaving Gypsy, Nikita, Angel, and Silver in the interview room.)

Silver: While we’re here, we have a favor to ask…

Angel: Will you help us interview the Gym Leaders?

Gypsy: Well, with four of us we should be able to keep them under control…

Nikita: Sure!

(The four girls laugh maniacally and exchange high-fives.)

Gypsy: All hail the Twisted Sisters…er, Cousins!

Angel: Twisted Cousins doesn’t sound as good. Let’s just say Twisted Sisters for the sake of coolness.

Nikita: Then all hail Gypsy, Nikita, Silver, and Angel…

All four: The Twisted Sisters!