--[the_captain has logged on]--
::the_captain is waiting::
the_captain: where the #&$@ is everbody?!
--[Partly Cloudy has logged on]--
--[Bareytt has logged on]--
Partly Cloudy: Hey Cid, Barret. What's up?
the_captain: not a ^&$*'n thing!!!
Bareytt: noyting
Partly Cloudy: Your typing's getting better Barret...
Bareytt: tanks
the_captain: so where the hell are the others?
Partly Cloudy: Yuffie was doing her homework when I last talked to her, but she said she'd be on as soon as she finished, Cait-- er Reeve is working at the Shinra building (again), Bugenhagen is still setting up Red's computer for him, and who ever knows where the hell that guy Vincent is?!
Bareytt: wowww man u tipe fast cLoud
the_captain: hey, you forgot Tifa. where's she?
Partly Cloudy: Oh, she left my house just a little while ago, so she should be on in a while.
the_captain: at your house eh? heh
Partly Cloudy: ... uh -_-;
Bareytt: hehh
--[materiaGurl has logged on]--
materiaGurl: Hi guys! ^_^
Bareytt: dann its her
materiaGurl: .... umm... keep working on that typing Barret! ^_^;
the_captain: what's with those damn smiley faces?!
materiaGurl: i like them! so there! =P
Partly Cloudy: Where IS everyone? We can't start the meeting without them.
the_captain: what's this @#%$'n meeting about anyway?
--[flowerlady has logged on]--
flowerlady: Hi everyone!
materiaGurl: who are you???
Bareytt: ?>?
flowerlady: It's me, Aeris!
Partly Cloudy: Aeris?! I thought... but... umm...
the_captain: Aeris? WHAT THE #&%$?! I thought Sephiroth killed your @$$?!
flowerlady: He did.
the_captain: huh?
flowerlady: I'm in the LIFESTREAM silly!
materiaGurl: WOW! That's like, sooo cool! ^_^
Partly Cloudy: Well, it's good to know that you're ok.
Bareytt: So what exactly do you do in the lifestream, Flower lady?
materiaGurl: hey! You typed a whole sentence without any typos!
Bareytt: This isn't Barret, it's Marlene. Daddy's letting me type for a little while.
the_captain: a little GIRL can type better than her old man?! @&^$!
Baryett: That was a bad word! Shame on you!
flowerlady: I don't know if it's good or bad to see that no one's really changed...
Partly Cloudy: lol
materiaGurl: Damn straight!
the_captain: watch your #%^#'n mouth girl!
Baryett: i has to take mARleenne out of tha room bcuze of u guys! dann cid, laways cussin
Partly Cloudy: ..... ok
--[heaven#7 has logged on]--
heaven#7: Hi Cloudy
Partly Cloudy: Hi Tifa ^_~
heaven#7: I missed you
Partly Cloudy: I missed you more
flowerlady: uh... Tifa?
materiaGurl: *gag* GAWD! Get a room you two!
heaven#7: Hey? Who's flowerlady?
the_captain: take a wild guess
heaven#7: hmm, flower... flowers... lady... flower-- lady... hmm...
the_captain: think harder dammit
heaven#7: Hey, waitaminute! Is that... AERIS?! How could that be possible? I thought you... uh...
flowerlady: I'm in the lifestream. And you know, there's not much to do around here... except... uh, nevermind.
Bareytt: huh?
Partly Cloudy: What do you do Aeris?
flowerlady: UH, nobody-- er I mean nothing!!! -_-;
the_captain: I don't give a damn! Is everbody here now? Can we start the #^@#&'n meeting already?!
Bareytt: ya, i hav 2 put Marlleen to bed ssoon
heaven#7: We really should wait for the others, you guys.
flowerlady: Who are you missing?
materiaGurl: duh! VINCENT! ... and uh... some other people i think
heaven#7: oooh! I think somebody has a crush!
Partly Cloudy: I know.
heaven#7: I wasn't talking about you, Cloud. ^_^;
flowerlady: lol
the_captain: so you like the freaky vamp huh kid?
materiaGurl: NO I DON'T!!! And I'm NOT a kid, you old... MEANIE!
Partly Cloudy: Sure Yuf... heh
materiaGurl: HONEST! I DON'T LIKE HIM!!
the_captain: Right kid. And I'm gonna quit smoking tomorrow.
Bareytt: and we a;l no TAHTS never gunna hapen!
the_captain: ...hey, now that you mention it... uh, BRB!
--[the_captain has logged off]--
flowerlady: Someone should tell him those things cause lung cancer.
heaven#7: Believe me, we've already tried!
materiaGurl: stubborn old b@stard!
--[Red_13 has logged on]--
Red_13: Good evening everyone, I hope I'm not late for the meeting.
Partly Cloudy: Nope. It hasn't even started yet. We're waiting for Cait-- I mean Reeve, and Vince... oh, and Cid left to get a cig.
heaven#7: Hey, you changed your name from Nanaki? Why'd you do that?
Red_13: Well, I thought, Red_13 sounded a little more 'cyber-net' like. Don't you think so?
flowerlady: I agree!
Red_13: ... Is that AERIS?! But how?
materiaGurl: blah blah blah, you know the story Red. Sephiroth killed her @$$, so she's in the lifestream now.
Red_13: I see...
Bareytt: hey, how u t ypign anywy? u dont got no hansd!
Red_13: Grandfather is typing for me. Oh, and uh... your own typing is... improving, Barret.
Bareytt: tanks man! i mean kat, er sometin
--[ROBOCAIT has logged on]--
ROBOCAIT: Hey fellers! What's kickin'?
Bareytt: EReeve?
ROBOTCAIT: Yee-haw! Howdy-doody!
heaven#7: umm... are you ok?
materiaGurl: ya, you're like talking all weird and stuff!
ROBOCAIT: Oh, right-o! This isn't Reeve.
Partly Cloudy: It's not?
ROBOCAIT: no-no-no sir!
Red_13: Who are you then?
materiaGurl: Rufus?
ROBOCAIT: no
Baryett: 1 of dose TURSKS?
ROBOCAIT: nope
Red_13: It must be Palmer then.
ROBOCAIT: wrong again!
Partly Cloudy: It's... it's... HOJO! Isn't it! (damn! I thought we got rid of that guy...)
ROBOCAIT: No, no and NO! It's CAIT SITH you dummies!
heaven#7: Huh? How'd you get a computer? You're just a robot!
ROBOCAIT: Reeve is busy working right now, so I took the liberty of "borrowing" his laptop to--
--[ROBOCAIT has been kicked]--
Partly Cloudy: I was just about to... who did that?
flowerlady: It was me.
Bareytt: U!? Dannm
flowerlady: I never liked that stupid piece of junk. He was more annoying than Yuffie!
materiaGurl: HEY!
flowerlady: I was only kidding... about you anyway.
Bareytt: nevea thot u had it in ya AERis
--[the-scary-vamipirish-man has logged on]--
the-scary-vamipirish-man: .........
heaven#7: What's wrong... uh, Vincent? Is that you?
the-scary-vamipirish-man: .......... !!!!
Red_13: Vincent? I see your choice of name has... er... I don't know what to say....
materiaGurl: I think it's kinda cute! ^_^
the-scary-vampirish-man: ....... SOMEONE changed my name again... and it's not cute!
Baryett: ya, its not ctue, its dann funnyn!
the-scary-vampirish-man: It's NOT funny either! Really Barret, your typing is terrible!
Baryett: HYE! u MEen foo!
the-scary-vampirish-man: ...... my point exactly.
Partly Cloudy: hey, woah Vince! Calm down... O_o;
heaven#7: Again? You know, it must have been Cid.
the-scary-vamipirish-man: ...... hmph. Of all the blasted......
flowerlady: Oh, don't be such a spoilsport Vincent
the-scary-vamipirish-man: ..... and who might you be?
flowerlady: Aeris silly!
the-scary-vamipirish-man: ....... ?!
Red_13: He's shocked.
the-scary-vamipirish-man: ...... Good to hear from you Aeris.... hmm, so it's Cid, eh? He's a dead man.
materiaGurl: like this Vinnie? +_+
the-scary-vampirish-man: .......
--[the_captain has logged on]--
Partly Cloudy: Well speak o' the devil! >={> (heh)
heaven#7: (that's so cute Cloud!)
the_captain: Say what'd I miss?
materiaGurl: A helluva lot, old man!
the-scary-vamipirish-man: .......!!!!!
Red_13: He's pissed.
flowerlady: umm...
the_captain: heh, oh hi there Vinnie... I see you changed your name again! lol
the-scary-vamipirish-man: And you have the nerve to joke about it to my face... ah, screen?!
the_captain: huh? oh it wasn't me! it was... uh... Barret!
Baryett: HEEY!
the-scary-vampirish-man: Don't lie to me Cid, you.... you..... YOU!!!
materiaGurl: I've never seen Vinnie so mad before! He's not just typing: "......."! Like, woah!
Partly Cloudy: Well, it's the tenth time this week that Cid's done it. He has reason to be!
heaven#7: I know! First it was Vampy, then bloodsucker, then coffin man, then... oh, I can't even remember the rest, there were too many
flowerlady: It's that bad huh?
Bareytt: no. its' wourse
the-scary-vamipirish-man: I don't know how you do it... but I swear, once I'm through with you Cid... you won't have any fingers left to type with!
the_captain: heh... er, it's only a joke Vinnie.
materiaGurl: ya, you should like, chill out Vinnie!
Red_13: I hate to interrupt this highly *cough* amusing banter, but don't we have a meeting to attend to?
Partly Cloudy: Red's right guys. We're all here, so let's get down to business.
the-scary-vampirish-man: ......... heh..... THAT'S IT!!!
--[the-scary-vamipirish-man has logged off]--
heaven#7: Hey, where'd Vincent go to?
materiaGurl: *sniff* he's gone, and it's ALL YOUR FAULT CID! >=(
Red_13: He's propably gone to exact his revenge upon you right now Cid. I'd suggest you log off and hide somewhere very far, far away until he calms down.
the_captain: Nah! I don't need to worry 'bout him! He wouldn't hurt me... would he?
Partly Cloudy: We need to start the meeting! Cid! Why can't you act your age for once! Now we have to wait for Vince to come back!!!!
materiaGurl: If Cid acted his age, he'd be like sitting in a rocking chair and drinking tea or something!
flowerlady: ??? I don't get it.
heaven#7: Was that supposed to be funny Yuffie? Cid ALWAYS drinks tea.
Bareytt: I regret to inform you all that my father has fallen asleep at the computer. I will have to drag him off to bed now.
Red_13: Good evening Marlene.
Baryett: Oh, hello Red. Are we still on for our debate on human genentics tomorrow?
Red_13: Of course.
Baryett: Very well then. Goodnight.
--[Baryett has logged off]--
Partly Cloudy: What was THAT all about?
Red_13: I have been giving on-line tutorials about biochemistry and endocrinology to Barret's daughter for the past month. She's been doing very well.
flowerlady: I can tell!
Red_13: Next month we're doing some simple math. Calculus and algebra.
materiaGurl: thats just weird. Who wants to learn stuff anyway?
heaven#7: uh... ok Yuffie! Hey guys, Cid hasn't said anything in a while. Do you think he left?
Partly Cloudy: heh, Vince probably scared him stiff!
the_captain: Cid's still here! ^@#$#!!!
Partly Cloudy: And it's your damn fault my meeting is being put off!
flowerlady: You've been really quiet Cid. What have you been doing all this time?
the_captain: Watching my back! I don't want no %^$@$'n vampire man coming to suck my blood tonight!
materiaGurl: heh... HE'S NOT A VAMPIRE!!!
Partly Cloudy: Well what are we going to do while we wait for Vincent?
heaven#7: I dunno. This is getting kinda boring. We've been here for so long, and the meeting hasn't even started yet!
Red_13: I have to agree. The wait has been tiresome. It would be nice if Vincent were to show up soon.
flowerlady: What's this meeting about anyway?
--[THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL has logged on]--
THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL: Hey there babe.
flowerlady: Pookie!
heaven#7: Babe?
Partly Cloudy: Pookie?!
THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL: I've been looking all over for you!
flowerlady: Well, I'm right here now aren't I Seph?
materiaGurl: w-what the?!
Partly Cloudy: S-SEPHIROTH?!
THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL: Yup. The one and only!
the_captain: I thought Cloud killed your @$$?! What the @#%^# is going on here?!
THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL: Oh, he did.
flowerlady: He said the exact same thing to me too.
materiaGurl: Like, WOAH! this is too weird!
THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL: So babe, what do you say you come on over to my place and we... *wink wink* We had lots of fun last night...
flowerlady: HELL YA! I'M THERE!
heaven#7: Hmm... so THAT'S what you do in the lifestream!
flowerlady: Uh... heh... bye guys!
--[flowerlady has logged off]--
Partly Cloudy: What the @&^%#??!!!!
the_captain: I never thought you'd say it-- er, type it Cloud. *sniff* Either way, it makes me damn proud of you boy!
THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL: Weeell... I'll be seeing you! I have... duties to attend to! heh heh
-[THE-ALMIGHTY-GENERAL has logged off]--
materiaGurl: GROSSNESS!!!
Red_13: That was most... interesting?
Partly Cloudy: I still can't believe... just... aw c'mon, Aeris and... SEPHIROTH?! Of all people!
heaven#7: Who knew?
the_captain: Who gives a &%#@ what Aeris is doing?! Are we ever gonna start this damn meeting, or are we gonna sit on our @$$es all night!
Red_13: I would have to agree with Cid. But not in such a... colourful manner.
heaven#7: lol
::everyone is waiting::
materiaGurl: Is Vinnie *gulp* ever gonna come back?
Heaven'sAngel: Of course! (I think)
materiaGurl: WAH! I'm leaving then! =(
Partly Cloudy: Noo! You CAN'T leave!
materiaGurl: but Barret left!
Partly Cloudy: True, but I don't think he'd understand the announcement I have to make anyway. In fact, I'm going to start RIGHT NOW! Screw Vincent and his freakin' mood swings!
the_captain: *sniff* ... so proud
Partly Cloudy: Is everybody ready?
materiaGurl: as long as you're not mean to Vinnie!
Red_13: Naturally.
materiaGurl: shut up meanie!
heaven#7: Come on now Cloud, it's late, I'm tired. Spit it out already!
Partly Cloudy: Okay, okay! Everyone just calm down!
--[CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION has logged on]--
the_captain: #&%@!! I bet I know who that is!
mateiaGurl: ^_^
heaven#7: Nice...er, name Vincent. What made you decide to change it to... that?
Partly Cloudy: Who cares! As long as I can get this over and done with!
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: MWA-HAHAHA!
Red_13: Vincent?
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: ............ ha
Red_13: I think he's gone off the deep end...
Partly Cloudy: Everybody just stop it! Can't you see I'm trying to make an announcement over here!
heaven#7: Hey, calm down Cloud.
materiaGurl: ya, it's not like the world's gonna end!
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: ..... heh heh! but it IS little girl!
materiaGurl: huh?
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: NOW, CID I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!
the_captain: eep!
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: .... yes.... be afraid.... be very afraid!
heaven#7: What's gotten into Vincent?
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: .............
Red_13: I haven't the slightest idea. I'm assuming that CID's constant badgering knocked a couple of screws loose...
the_captain: @^%#!!!
Partly Cloudy: Can I please get on with my announcement? Like, NOW?!
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: .......heh...... heh heh....
Red_13: I do believe my assumptions were correct.
CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION: Right you are you... you... THING! Now... for the rest of you who dared insult me...... feel the wrath of my.... JENOVA VIRUS!!!! MWA-HAHAHAAAA!
-[CHAOS THE ULTIMATE DEMON OF DESTRUCTION has logged off]--
Partly Cloudy: What the--
**FATAL ERROR// SYSTEM CRASH...@**
(and all the computer screens went black... mwa haha!)
THE END!
Weeeell... okay, I feel kinda bad for leaving you all hanging there, so here's what happened to everyone after this crazy fic ended:
Cloud-- The poor sod never got the chance to start his meeting. What was this meeting about you say?....... give me a minute and I'll think of something........ nothing...... He probably would have forgotten what he was going to say anyway. (serves him right or having a meeting on the INTERNET, the pointy-headed dope)
Tifa-- Nothing really interesting here. Her computer crashed, end of story. But at least she could pay for a new one, cuz she has a JOB (at a bar) unlike some other sword-swinging, spikey-haired airheads that i know...(oops! did i say that out loud?!)
Barret-- Was sleeping soundly after Marlene read him a bedtime story. (it was SLEEPING BEAUTY, if you really wanted to know) His computer was fine cuz wittle Marlene had already logged off for him.
Cait Sith-- Got the stuffing kicked outta him after Reeve found out that he stole his precious laptop.
Yuffie-- She was hysterical when her computer messed up. Godo kept hearing her muttering something about her lost "Vincent Shrines" but decided not to question her about it. (he didn't want to know, and you know what? neither do I!)
RedXIII (aka Nanaki)-- He could care less what happened. It was Bugenhagen's computer, not his. He went to sleep on a rug by a nice cozy fire while Bugenhagen ripped his hair out. Wait a sec... that old guy doesn't HAVE any hair, now does he?
Cid-- He didn't even care that his computer was ruined, he just wanted to get as far away from Vincent as he could. But that never happened. Vince found him (hiding under the bed) and put him through the most horrible torture... he strapped him to a chair and forced him to watch 24hr Buffy the Vampire Slayer marathons! (head for the hills! wait, no Angel's... nevermind)
Vincent-- Vincent was extremely happy with all the mad destruction he caused, and the next day, got a card in the mail saying: "I have taught you well, from Sephiroth." He felt very pleased with himself, that is until Lucrecia stormed out of the lifestream and boxed his ears, while at the same time berating him for being so cruel to a fellow human being. (I mean, its BUFFY for pete's sake!)
And what would any Final Fantasy fanfic.. in fact, and I kid you not, ANY fic (that I write anyway), wether it be Star Ocean, or Zelda... *ahem* So what would it be without SEPHIROTH (and Aeris)?-- And contrary to what SOME of you people out there might believe... he and Aeris spent the night.... aw heck, I was never any good at lying anyway! So, let's just say that they were having... er, fun... playing Monopoly. That's it, MONOPOLY! (damn, I'm a genius... heh, right)
Now what is the lesson we all learned from this fic?
Cloud: *whines* My meeting never started!
Tifa: Shut up Cloud. You were never supposed to HAVE a meeting.
RedXIII: The moral of the story was: Don't use the internet to talk with your loved ones, use telepathic brain frequencies instead.
Aeris: That may be so, but it's worth it to get stabbed through the back by an insane (but DAMN good lookin') megalomaniac if you can--
Sephiroth: Ah... that's enough out of you Aeris... -_-;;
Uh... right. But I have to admit, the girl does have a point there...
~~ this is really the end now =Þ
Vincent: Thank the heavens!
Yuffie: Shut... up... you.... you.... vampire!
Vincent: I didn't think you would actually say it... *sniffle*
Yuffie: Aww! Don't cry Vinnie! I was only kidding.
Vincent: ... you were?
Yuffie: 'Course! Unless you really ARE a vamp--
Vincent: NO! ... uh, heh... I mean... no I am not.
(heh, and now SOMEBODY owes me 5 bucks for actually writing this stoopid crap and actually putting it up here... you know who you are)
**Yet Another Note: My sister wanted me to use the word "whomp", somewhere in the fic, so here it is... WHOMP! (happy now sis?!)
