*Warning-if you hate Sailor Moon, why are you reading this?
*Caution-Read at Your Own Risk-story may go on and on.

This day started like any other-Usagi was late for school. Or so she thought. Why didn't Luna or Mom or somebody wake me up today? she thought. It was strange that Luna was gone, but even stranger that no one woke her up. Or tried to, anyway. Maybe those Negaverse creeps captured everyone I know to keep me from passing the math final today! Or maybe Mom's having an affair! Or..... "Honey, why are you up and shoving food in your mouth at 50 miles an hour?" Good! Mom's still around.

"What ever do you mean, Mom? I need to get to school!"

"Oh, silly little Bunny. It's Saturday."

"Oh."

"Why don't you see what your friends are doing, since you're already up and dressed."

"Mo-om! Ami's probably studying, Rei is such a bitch, Mako-chan's probably playing tennis, or volleyball with Minako! And Darien is........"

"Darien is what?"

"Sooooooo seeeeexyyyyyy........."

"I'm going back to bed now. Amuse yourself." Usagi wasn't listening, because she was too busy staring at the wall with hearts in her eyes. "Mmmmm. Such a firm ass."

"Usagi!!! Snap out of it! I need to talk to you."

"Oh, hi Luna."

"Why are you out of bed so early? It's-"

"Saturday, I know."

"You really are a meatball head. Now wipe that milk off your chin."

"Oh. Kay."

"I overheard your complaints, and figured you'd forgotten some things."

"Like what?"

"That Minako stopped playing volleyball a long time ago because you slammed the ball into her head and knocked her unconscious and, more importantly, there's a scout meeting today."

"Scout meeting! Why didn't you remind me last night you stupid cat?!"

"I had more important things to do. Besides, you wouldn't have remembered anyway."

"I hate it when you're right."

"Get your ass in gear!"

"Alright already, I'm going."

"Now!"

* * *

At Rei's temple, the scout meeting was in progress. Not girl scouts, Sailor Scouts. Rei started the complaints. "She is such a meatball head!Why isn't she here yet?!"

"Rei, you know for a fact that a better description would be 'dumbass'."

"Hey, she's your mother." This silenced Chibi Usa for a second. Just a second.

"I prefer to think that I take after my father." Minako decided to make a point.

"That's probably because you thought he was Mr. Hot himself when you first showed up."

"How was I supposed to know he was my dad?" Saving further argument, Usagi came rushing in, slamming into Chibi Usa and falling at the feet of someone she'd never seen before.

"Hey, yo, who's that?"

The stranger spoke. "You were right, Chibi Usa my friend, she is a dumbass!"

Makoto stood up. "Usagi, this is Sailor Saturn. She won't tell us her real name, and Chibi won't either. They're best friends in the future."

"Speaking of Chibi Usa, why is she so tall?"

"She's fourteen now, buttmunch." Rei interjected.

"Wait a second, just two years ago she was five."

"Time goes way faster in the future. She went back, remember, monkeybutt?"

"Of course I do, and stop calling me bad names! Now for business. The cake shop is having another sale tomorrow, so-"

Rei interrupted. "What does this have to do with the Sailor Scouts, buttmonkey?"

"Plenty. I thought we could celebrate our victory over, um....Nephlite! there, because it would be a great opportunity to...do....something."

Rei interjected."We beat him three years ago! You just want an excuse to cram food into that oversized piehole of yours, buttsurfer!"

"That's not true! I don't even know how to surf!"

To save the meeting from turning into a debate, Minako tried to change the subject. "You know what, I think Darien got his car."

Her topic worked. "The red one?"

"Duh. What other car did he have, buttwipe?" replied the argumentative Rei.

"Shut up, Rei. Now, how did he get it?"

"I don't know." To save herself, Minako looked at Ami. "You haven't said much. Say something, dammit!"

"Well, I don't know if I can come tomorrow, because I'm only nine chapters ahead of my math class instead of my usual ten, and I was going to-"

"Yada yada yada." exclaimed Usagi. "Have some fun for once!"

"Well, okay, but I just hope nothing goes wrong. Luna told me that she had found some new activity last night, and that it might be the Negaverse because she's never seen anything like it before."

"Lu-na! You tell her that and not me?"

"Well, Usagi, if you had gotten here on time, I announced it to everyone."

Usagi just stomped off towards home for a snack.

* * *

The next day everyone was at the cake shop-except Usagi. Rei started off as usual. "Jeez, that buttdumpling is even late to pig out!"

Minako seemed more concerned. "That's definitely not normal for her."

Makoto was the first one up. "I say we go kick some ass!"

Ami was apprehensive. "Maybe we should wait a little longer. Besides, I brought my math book, and I'm right in the middle of-" Makoto was already out the door, and everyone else was in the middle of going after her. "Wait for me, you pooieheads!"

* * *

Meanwhile, Usagi had been drooling all over Darien's sports car. "How the hell did you get Nephlite's car?"

"Well, Usagi, I-" he checked his watch. "Am going to be late for karate class! Gottta run!" His now squealing tires were proof enough of this.

"Damn." Usagi said to herself. "Now I'll never get a ride in that car to the cake shop!" A voice behind her startled her out of that pout.

"You really should be concentrating on getting a ride to a math tutor. Your grades are horrible!"

"Oh, hi Lun...aaaaah!" she turned around and saw a monster with numbers all over her outfit. "You're not Luna."

"Uh, no. I'm Matrix, mathematical genius of the Negaverse, and judging by your grades I would say that you think with your ass!"

"Hey, if you're so smart, what's seven to the second times two to the fifth times three to the second raised to the second times three to the negative second, all that, over seven to the negative first times two to the second raised to the third times three times three to the negative fourth, in simplest exponential notation?"

"Simple. Seven times two to the sixth times three to the negative first."

"Hey, thanks. Now I finally got the answer to number sixteen on Unit four-forty one."

"That's cheating. It's not nice to cheat, you little bitch." With that, Matrix tossed a giant deadly number four at Usagi, who quickly dodged into an alley and transformed into Sailor Moon.

"Why don't you quit doing that freakass transformation crap and get out there!?"

"Who are you?"

"Beecrappers, and I thought all anime knew each other. I'm Meowth, a super special Poke`mon!"

"A what?"

"Just go fight, dumbass."

"Oh. Kay." Usagi/Sailor Moon stepped out of the alley, away from the strange little cat thing. "I am Sailor Moon, champion of justice! I stand for love and justice, and on behalf of the moon, I will punish you, meaning I will moondust your ass! You take that vile thing called math and use it to destroy people's happiness, dammit! Accept your punishment, bitch! Ow!" Matrix had wasted no time in launching a pi sign, pinning Usagi to the ground. Meowth decided to comment.

"Ya know what? That was a corny speech, and you even repeated yourself. Booriing!" Suddenly, a rose appeared from nowhere, slashing Matrix across the face.

"You're a major bitch, and I am Tuxedo Mask, protector of Sailor Moon! You take her least favorite subject and use it against her. Take-ow!" Once again, Matrix wasted no time. Once again again, Meowth commented.

"You, meatball head's boyfriend! You suck more than she does! You-" Another voice cut him off.

"Meowth! I rescued you from Team Rocket, and you run away and insult people! Get your ass over here right now before I get pissed off!" Usagi was very puzzled. Six teenage girls in sailor suits (with a little girl, also in a sailor suit) and a guy in baggy clothes that she'd never seen before were standing on a delivery truck parked across the street.

"Who the crack are you?"

The tie-dyed one, apparently the leader, jumped off first.

"Sailor Vogue!"

Then one in a purple sailor suit.

"Sailor Sweets!"

Then one in a red suit with gold bows.

"Sailor Ty!"

Then one in a sea green suit.

"Sailor Poke`mon! Meowth, come here!"

Then one in a light blue suit with light purple bows.

"Sailor Anime!"

Then one in a red suit with an extremely long ponytail.

"Sailor Shay!"

Then the little girl.

"Chibi Asswhupper!"

Finally the guy.

"I am Tuxedo Duuuuude!"

Usagi broke the news. "You're not wearing a tuxedo, dumbass."

"Crap. I knew I forgot something." By now the other scouts had shown up. Ami/Sailor Mercury used her virtual computer to make some calculations.

"Those strange people are new scouts, and I can probably defeat the math thing by confusing it!" She clicked off her virtucomp and faced Matrix, saying some really outrageous math problem (which is too confusing to write down), causing Matrix to disintegrate along with her pi signs.

"Wow, Ami. Your annoying as hell math smarts finally did something!" exclaimed the now free Usagi. "Now let's all go eat cake. The new scouts can introduce themselves."

At the cake shop, the group (in normal clothes) was sitting at a table.

"Soooo, talk." Usagi was pigging, but was dying to know who the new scouts were.

"Well," answered the leader. "I'm D,"

Usagi interrupted. "D? Just D?"

"Yes, just D, a.k.a. Sailor Vogue. I'm thinking of changing my scout name."

"I'm Idlyn, a.k.a. Sailor Sweets."

"I'm Vicky, a.k.a. Sailor Ty, also thinking of changing my name."

"I'm Natalia, a.k.a. Sailor Poke`mon."

"I'm Kateryna, a.k.a. Sailor Anime."

"I'm Shayeena, a.k.a. Sailor Shay, seriously thinking of changing my name."

"I'm Chibi Asswhupper, in dire need of a real name."

"I'm, like, Toast, a.k.a.-"

"Wait!" interrupted Usagi. "Because you're wearing the same thing, you're Tuxedo Dude!"

"No," replied Toast. "Tuxedo Duuuuude. You hafta, like, make it longer or something."

"Oh. Kay." Usagi announced. "Anyway, I'm Usagi, a.k.a. Sailor Moon, and this is Makoto, Minako, Rei, Ami, and Seeeeeexxxxyyyyy Guuuyyy, I mean, Daaariiieenn.....I'm back! a.k.a. Sailor Jupiter, Sailor Venus, Sailor Mars, Sailor Mercury, and Fiiiiiirmmm Aaaaassss, I mean, Tuxeeedooo Maaaaask........" She started to stare at Darien, but was interrupted by a loud "Hey Usagi!" from across the room. "Oh damn, not Melvin!"

"Wow!" said Melvin. "I can't believe how many friends you have! Can I join in?"

"Pooooooooiiiieeeeee!"

* * *

"Matrix, you have failed me." The evil leader was sitting comfortably on his throne, watching Matrix with interested eyes. "You're lucky I created that image of you disintegrating so you could return here."

"Sire, I-"

"No excuses. Get away from me before I become pissed."

"Yes, sire."

"Perhaps you are underestimating these girls." rang a mocking voice from across the hall.

"Leave me alone, Amber, you bitch. I'm tired of listening to you."

"All I'm trying to say is that maybe you should let someone else try. Someone with a woman's touch."

"Are you hinting at your own damn self?"

She smiled. "You know me too well."

"Go ahead. There's nothing to lose, is there?"

"Thank you, Dark Prince." Amber faded out.

"Hmmm. Deciva!" At his beckoning, a woman with long claws, fangs, and huge bat wings appeared. "Yes, your highness?"

"It's getting rather lonely in my dark palace. I am brewing a plan that will both cure my lonesomeness and help rid us of those Sailor Scouts. While it is still in development, I know that I will need your help. I may call you anytime, so be ready."

"As you wish, my lord." Deciva also faded out.

The Dark Prince, who I will not reveal his name at the moment, sighed. "Alone again. Pooie."

* * *

Meanwhile, the scouts were enjoying another beautiful afternoon. After leaving the cake shop, Nat said that she wanted to talk to everyone, so they went to her house. Darien said that he needed to go, but everyone else stayed.

"I just wanted to say that I currently own about sixty Poke`mon, and since I have some extras, I thought I would give each of you one. First, Makoto, I give you Pikachu. Next, Rei, I give you Charmander, who is my personal favorite. Ami, for you I have Squirtle, and for Minako, I have Bulbasaur. Usagi-chan, please don't be angry with me. The Poke`mon I will give you might not be something you like now, but it will evolve into something you like later. This is Caterpie."

"POOOOOOO! It's a bug!!!!" Usagi started tearing around the room, closely followed by Caterpie.

"Another thing," continued Nat, (Usagi can still be heard rushing around the room screaming.) "After a while, your Poke`mon will evolve. The ones I have given you are fairly easy to deal with, and once they have evolved completely I will probably give you some different, more powerful ones."

Ami checked her watch. "We need to get home if we want to get enough sleep for school tomorrow."

* * *

The next day Usagi was, of course, about to be late. Lucky for her, though, Darien just happened to be driving by when she ran out the door.

"Hey Usagi! Need a ride?"

"You would do that for me?"

"Sure, why not?" As they drove along, Darien tried to make conversation. "So, you knew Chibi Usa and Hotaru went back to the future, right?"

"No, I didn-who's Hotaru?"

"Sailor Saturn. Everyone knows that."

"I didn't!"

"Damn, people don't tell you anything." They finally reached the school.

"See you around, Darien."

"See ya." As he drove off, Usagi couldn't help staring at the lovely red car and wondering how Darien ended up with it. Then the first bell rang and she rushed to class.

"Usagi!" Her teacher was calling her.

"Uh oh. Yes?"

"I'm amazed! You're actually here on time for once!"

"Uh, thanks."

"Anyway, class, we have a new student today! Her name is Amber, and I want you all to be very nice to her." The new girl took a seat right behind Usagi and started to mutter under her breath.

"What luck! I'm right behind that dumbass Sailor Moon! My brother (that son of a bitch) should be quite pleased."

Suddenly Usagi turned around. "Did you say something about Sailors?"

Amber sweatdropped and scratched the back of her head nervously. "Oh, uh, yeah. I said, er, Sailor V is, ah, great!"

"Oh! You like Sailor V too! Did you ever see the one when-"

"Usagi! Are you talking during class?"

"Hee hee heh heh oh."

After school, Usagi was unhappily cornered by Melvin, who was desperate to talk.

"Oh, Usagi-chan, did you see that new girl? She's sooooo beeeautiful! Her perfect blond hair, just hanging off her shoulders.....did you notice that it has slightly gold accents? I think I'm in love!"

Usagi saw her way out. "Hey Melvin! I think I just saw her go that way. Maybe you can talk to her!"

"Really? Wow!"

Usagi couldn't help laughing her ass off.

"What's so funny?"

Usagi turned around. It was Amber.

"Oh, nothing." She always felt kind of funny whenever Amber was around. It didn't make sense.

"Okay. See you tomorrow, I guess."

* * *

Later that day, Amber was reporting.

"Sire, I have gained entry to the school and have managed to grab a seat right behind that Sailor Moon."

"Good. Carry on with your plans. I have my own to attend to."

"Very well, my prince." and she was gone.

* * *

By Thursday, Amber was the most popular girl in school to almost everyone, and was second in smarts only to Ami. This one factor kept her from being the most popular with the brainy bunch. Amber was currently reporting to her brother.

"That smartass is interfering with my plans. She must be eliminated!"

"Hmm, yes, I believe that Matrix has a grudge against that one. However, I cannot let her have revenge because she will certainly be defeated again. I have a plan to get rid of her, as well as solve all of our problems. Deciva!"

"I had a feeling you would call me today, your highness."

"Good. This is my plan........."

* * *

After school on Friday, I was talking to Chibi Asswhupper, trying to find a real name for her. (First-person now. How cool is that? Sorry if I confused you. It will happen every once in awhile. No, it's not me the author talking. Figure it out for your own damn self.)

"Ami," she said to me, (See?) "I need a new name. A real name, dammit!"

"I'm thinking." I told her. "How about Mori?"

"That's good for now. If you think of something better we can fix it."

Before either of us could say anything, Amber walked up.

"Hi. Um, could you walk home with me? I usually go with someone else, but they were sick today. Please? I have to walk through the woods, and I hate going alone."

Her deep blue eyes seemed so honest and frightened I couldn't say no.

"Sure."

Before long, we were in the woods. I could completely understand Amber's reasoning. It was pretty dark. Before long we all heard a little girl crying just out of sight. Amber spoke first.

Amber left, and we soon found the girl. She was about Mori's age, with startlingly black hair. She stopped crying when she saw us, then started laughing the most evil sounding laugh you could possibly imagine. Needless to say, I started to get worried. We were suddenly transported to the floor of a large room, flat on our stomachs. I looked up and found myself gazing into the gentlest lavender eyes I'd ever seen. The man they belonged to spoke just as gently.

"Welcome to my throne room."

Mori immediately yelled "Prince Diamond!"

"No," he replied. "But I suppose we look alike."

"Then who are you?" I asked.

"Now, really." he answered. "Even the reader doesn't know that. Would I just tell you? You're welcome to guess."

Mori exclaimed "Mr. Bad Guy Person Man!"

"Uh, no."

Mori merely said "Okay, I love you, buh-bye!" and transported herself away. Then I noticed that Amber was there too. She turned to the man.

"Come on, Amethyst, you've kept them in suspense long enough. Oops!" she said with a smile.

"Amber, my sister, how childish. Deciva!"

At this announcement, the little girl walked in.

"Yes?"

"Remove your disguise already."

The girl transformed into a hideous winged thing. I finally spoke again.

"What do you want with me?"

"You shall soon see. Amber, Deciva, you are dismissed." They faded out. "If you would follow me, please."

"Wait a second." I answered. "Mercury Star Power!"

"That is truly unnecessary."

"Really. Mercury Bubbles Blast!"

"Oh come now." Amethyst raised his hand, and my bubbles floated over and surrounded it. With a flick of the wrist he tossed them over his shoulder. "You see, I'm not going to hurt you."

I decided to follow him, mainly because he could easily kill me, and we soon entered what looked like a bedroom. My virtucomp didn't detect anything suspicious, so I decided to trust this guy. Besides, he was quite polite and gentle, especially for an evil ruler.

"This is your room. Please make yourself comfortable."

I detransformed and sat on the bed, feeling sleepy all of a sudden. I'll just rest my eyes.........

* * *

"Has anyone seen Ami?" Usagi asked at the next scout meeting.

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"No."

"Like, no."

"You know what," Usagi said. "That just wasted a lot of space."

"Really."

"Really."

"Real-"

"STOP IT!"

"Okay."

"Okay."

"O-"

"AAAAARRRRGGG!"

"Okay, guys, really." replied Minako.

"Sure."

"Sure."

Usagi managed to stop the whole thing in its tracks by saying, "Why isn't Darien ever at the scout meetings?"

"Yeah!"

"Yeah!" Or maybe not.

"Look you guys, I'm serious. Darien never comes, and I want to know why! So, I'm going to call him right now!"

"Gee," mused Rei as Usagi left to find a phone. "I wonder how long it'll take her to realize she doesn't know his phone number."

Makoto answered, "I'm guessing three, two, one-"

"Hey, anyone know his number?"

"Bingo."

"What?"

"Nothing," replied Rei. "It's 867 5309."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it."

"Gee," mused Minako. "I wonder how long it'll take her to realize that's a song."

D answered, "I'm guessing three, two, one-"

"Hey, isn't that a song?"

"Bingo."

"What?"

"Nothing," replied Rei. "It's actually-"

"Hey Usagi! I decided to come to a meeting for once. What's up?"

"Never mind." said Rei.

"What?" asked Darien.

"I was talking to Usagi."

"Hey Darien, what is your phone number?" inquired Minako.

"Oh. It's-"

"WAIT!" screamed Usagi. "More importantly, how did you end up with Nephlite's red Ferrari?"

"Well, Usagi, you see-I completely forgot! I'm supposed to meet Andrew in five minutes!" And he rushed out the door.

"Gee," mused Kat. "I wonder how long it'll take her to figure out that that was really stupid."

Vicky answered, "I'm guessing three, two, one-"

"Hey, I didn't get his phone number!"

"Bingo."

"What?"

* * *

Meanwhile, Mori had been in the park, and had completely forgotten what had happened. All she remembered was that she now had a real name.

* * *

"My lord, how is your plan?" Amber asked.

"Quite good, actually. We now have-"

"What happened to keeping the reader in suspense?"

"Hmmmm. Good point."

<I believe> said the author. <That now would be a good time for those little star thingys>

"How professional sounding." replied Amber.

"Quite true, though." answered Amethyst.

* * *

* *

Stop! Something did happen! Oh wait, that's tomorrow. Never mind.

* * *

The next next day (Monday), Amber stopped to talk to Usagi.

"I haven't noticed Ami around. Is she sick?"

"Actually, we think she got captured."

"Captured? By who?"

"Did I say captured? I meant, uh...." Usagi sweatdropped. "Oh, look at the time. I've got to go home and study!"

As Minako spied on the conversation, she couldn't help but wonder what Usagi needed to study for on the last day of school.

* * *

Usagi was very confused on Tuesday. She was late, and no one was at school. No teachers, nobody.

"Why Usagi-chan. Don't you have enough sense to know that there isn't any school? It's summer!"

Usagi whirled around at the somewhat familiar voice, and found a woman with crystal blue hair in a ponytail down to her waist, with eyes to match, wearing a crystal blue ballgown with matching fan (like Emerald's).

"Who are you?"

"I am Arctica, Queen of Ice! You are a stupid girl, and nothing more!"

"Oh yeah? Moon Crystal Power!"

By the time she had transformed into Sailor Moon, the woman was gone.

"Drat!"

"What's wrong, Sailor Moon?" It was Sailor Pluto.

"Oh, I just met this new enemy, and Sailor Mercury's missing, and I don't know Darien's phone number, or how he got Nephlite's car."

"You know, we never really killed Nephlite. Zoycite did."

"Oh yeah."

"Why are you at school? It's-"

"Summer, I know."

"You really are a meatball head."

* * *

"She really is a meatball head." said Arctica.

"Yes," replied Amber. "Without Sailor Mercury, she's lost!"

"This should make her all the more easy to defeat." answered Amethyst.

"I love you, you love me..."

"What was that?"

That was, in fact, Barney.

"I'm leaving," announced Arctica, and so she did.

"It's coming right for me!" screamed Amber.

"I just want to give you a nice big hug."

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!"

Suddenly the purple menace fell sideways, a beautifully carved dagger protruding from its back. Amber looked around to find the one who had saved her from such a terrible fate, and saw only her brother, sitting comfortably in his throne on the other side of the room.

"I see your confusion," he said. "Perhaps you have forgotten the games we played when we were little, and my skill at throwing a dagger?"

"I suppose I have. But who could have sent such an evil creature?"

"Certainly not the Sailor Scouts. They are too just for that."

"I know," answered Arctica, returning since the danger was gone. "PBS." she gave Amethyst his dagger back.

"Curse that PBS!" he yelled, slamming his dagger into the long wooden table in front of him.

* * *

"Excuse me, I am the CEO of PBS, and I just wanted to break in and say that we air only quality programming and-"

"Shut up, you!" interrupted Amethyst. And so she did, because there was now a beautifully carved dagger protruding from her back.

* * *

"Hey Usagi, can I ask you a question that I have been dying to ask you ever since I first saw you?" asked D.

"Sure, as long as it isn't about anything like school or math."

"It's not. How do you get your hair to look like two meatballs and a pair of giant spaghetti noodles?"

"It's simple. I just-hey!"

* * *

"PIIIIIIIIIIK!"

Makoto, Minako, and Rei were trying to figure out how to deal with Pikachu, and it wasn't going very well. This was the eleventh time they'd been electrocuted, and they hadn't even got him to eat anything yet. Just then Meowth walked in.

"What's goin' on in here?"

"We can't get my Pikachu to eat anything."

"Well, I'll ask him what's wrong. Pikachu, what's wrong?"

"Pik pikachu, pika pika."

"Pikachu says that he hates the color orange."

"Gee," mused Minako. "Maybe we shouldn't have brought him here."

They had taken him to Minako's room, which had orange everything- walls, carpet, bedsheets, lamp-

"We get the point." said Meowth.

<Sorry.> replied the author. <Sometimes I just ramble on and on and on and on and->

"You're doing it again!"

<Oh. I'm really, really, really, really->

"Cut it out! You sound like a broken record."

"Pik pika pika chu!"

"Pikachu says to get on with the story already."

<Fine, I will.>

"Oh, getting angry with us now, eh?"

<No, I really meant it. Sorry if it sounded mean.>

"Anyway, let's take him outside."

Outside, the girls-

"And Poke`mon!"

-and Poke`mon found a third grade kid in an orange parka.

>Uh oh< thought the reader.

"Pika!" shouted Pikachu.

"Mph!" replied the kid. He was then toasted.

"Did you just, like, call me or something?" asked Toast.

<No, I didn't.>

"Okay, dude. I'll just go eat some Pop-tarts, like, now, or something."

"I keep thinking," said Rei. "That someone's supposed to say something now."

"Yeah," answered Makoto. "And then later this kid's supposed to come back to life."

"Then," declared Minako. "He's supposed to die again. Oh well."

<You know, this chapter didn't have to happen.>

"Whaddaya mean, didn't have to happen?" argued Meowth.

<It didn't go anywhere.>

"So? It was my only other part so far!"

<It didn't relate to the story.>

"So?" replied Minako. "It was funny."

"Pik!"

"Pikachu said yeah! Besides, it was his only part in the entire story!"

<Oh well. I guess it stays then.>

"Hey, look at all the rats!" yelled Makoto. "I think they're here for the kid!

* * *

Toast had gone to the store, because he realized that he was out of Pop-tarts.

"Whoa, there's so many kinds, I just like, don't know what to buy or something."

Suddenly he heard voices behind him.

"Hey, dude!"

" 'Sup, dude?!"

"Tartage, dude?"

It was his friends, Bacon, Eggs, and Jam.

"Sheah, dude. I'm like, clueless, or something."

>When is he not?< thought the reader.

"Reader dude, I meant as in like, what to buy."

"Dude," said Jam. "We're all gonna like, rock out in the clubhouse tonight or something."

The clubhouse was Jam's basement, which included a stereo and big screen TV.

"Dude!" answered Toast.

"Dude."

"Dude."

"Dude."

"Dude?"

"Dude."

"Dude?"

"Dude!"

This was their mysterious language.

"Right. So you're like, coming or something?"

"Sheah!"

"Before we leave, dude, like, buy the Wild Berry or something."

"Whatever dude."

* * *

Meanwhile, Usagi had been talking with Setsuna/Sailor Pluto.

"So you think you could go back in time and see if you can find out what happened to Ami, right?"

"Yes."

"Well go! Go, go, go, go, go!"

"Okay, okay, I'm going!"

"Now!"

* * *

Setsuna had gone back in time, and found herself right in the middle of a Nazi concentration camp.

"Hey, you, in line, now!" a guard yelled at her.

"Yeah, right." she replied under her breath.

"I said, in line!"

She waited until he got close enough, then kicked him in the stomach, grabbed his gun, and had it pointed at his throat before he could react.

"Now then, I'll be leaving, so don't give me any more trouble, okay?"

The guard nodded. As a parting thought, Setsuna gave him a sweep kick, knocking him on his back. She threw the gun to one of the prisoners, and left to find somewhere else in time.

* * *

"Sire, this D seems to have a rebellious air and an I'm-going-to-kick-your-ass attitude about her that our Dark Crystal could easily find root in."

"Hmm. Good work, Amber. Maybe I have found my next Queen."

* * *

As I sat in the scout meeting, I couldn't help but be bored to death. (This isn't Ami.) Usagi bitch had already eaten all of the cookies Mako-chan made, so there really wasn't anything to do. I decided to get up.

"Where are you going, D?" Minako asked me.

"Just to take a walk. This is boring."

"But-"

"I'm leaving. Period." As I walked out, I could hear Usagi saying that this Arctica person's voice had sounded somewhat familiar. So what? I really didn't understand how a dumbass like that could be our leader, much less the Moon Princess. I decided to go through the woods. As I walked along, I heard a voice behind me.

"Hee hee, thanks for saving me the trouble of finding you."

It was Amber, but she was wearing a uniform that looked like-

"The Negaverse!" I hissed. Before I could do anything, we were transported to a huge hall. There was a throne on one side, and on that throne sat who must have been the current evil leader. I had to admit, he was very hot. Just then, Zoycite walked in.

"Hey! The scouts killed you way back in the first season!"

"Not quite. As you can see, I'm perfectly fine. I came to-"

Before she could say more, I leapt at her. After all, she killed Nephlite.

"This is for Nephlite!" I yelled, punching her in the face. "And his cute hair-(thwack) and his nice clothes-(thwack) and his hot ass-(thwack) and his cool cathedral house-(thwack) and his beautiful car!" for something different, on the last point I slammed her against the wall.

"Darien has that, you know." interrupted Amber.

"Yeah, I know." I now had Zoycite pinned to the ground with my hands around her throat.

"Let her go." the evil guy said. I did. He was too hot to ignore. Zoycite transported away, rubbing her neck and looking the part of someone who’d had a serious ass kicking.

"You were right, Amber. This girl has quite a defiant air." the leader declared.

"Who are you, and why did you bring me here?" I demanded.

"I am Amethyst, and you shall see the other answer soon enough. Follow me, please."

"I'm sorry, but no."

"Oh, come on, Amethyst. Let me do it."

"Fine, Amber."

I saw her pull out the Dark Crystal.

"What are you...AHH!"

"What are they?" screamed Amber.

"Teletubbies!" I answered.

"PBS strikes again." replied Amethyst.

"I'll get them." said a voice.

"Who are you?" asked the leader.

"I'm Dick Clark."

"Who?"

"It doesn't matter!" shouted Amber. "Just get rid of those things!"

Then she woke up. Just kidding. Dick Clark had left and taken the Teletubbies with him. "Now that that's over with, it's your turn!" laughed Amber.

"Wait!" interrupted Amethyst. "I can't stand to watch her suffer."

"Then leave the room." replied Amber curtly.

"Don't speak to me that way, and I'm going to put her to sleep first."

The last thing I remembered was Amber placing the Dark Crystal in the air over me.

* * *

"You know, I'm losing friends fast." Usagi said.

"Well," replied Luna. "If we could figure out what's going on, it would help."

"I wonder where Sailor Pluto is."

"Right here." Sailor Pluto answered.

"AH! Don't scare me like that."

"Sorry. I couldn't find out what happened, but I heard that D is missing."

"Yeah-"

"Hello!"

"Who said that?" Usagi wondered aloud.

"Me!"

"Stop this nonsense!" yelled Luna. "And tell us who you are!"

"It's me, Hotaru." She stepped out of the shadows.

"I thought you were in the future with Chibi Usa."

"Usagi-chan, I followed Setsuna here. Chib is still in the future, with Diana."

"Who's Diana?"

"Diana is my daughter." answered Luna.

"Oh, a cat. Who's the father?"

"That isn't important right now. We've got to-"

"Usagi!" It was her communicator.

"What?" she answered. It was Darien.

"Transform into Sailor Moon, call the other scouts, and get your butts over here! I'm positive it's the Negaverse."

"We're on our way! Moon Crystal Power!"

"Pluto Planet Power!"

"Saturn Planet Power!"

* * *

By the time all the scouts had arrived, Darien had transformed into Tuxedo Mask. There was a lady dressed in a shaped, short sleeved black dress with two large silver dragons on the front hovering in the air, arms folded. She tossed her long lavender hair.

"Well, Sailor Moon, or should I say, Sailor Moonbitch, I always wondered how you got your hair to look like two meatballs and a pair of giant spaghetti noodles. Oh well, the world may never know. Especially if I kill you, of course, Usagi."

Didn't someone say that earlier? Usagi thought. Out loud she said,

"Who are you and how did you know my real name?"

"I'm not going to just flat out tell you my name, and you probably won't be able to figure it out yourself because that involves thinking, and I know how much that makes your airy blond head hurt." she answered sarcastically. "I really don't understand how a dumbass like you could be the leader, much less the Moon Princess."

"How did you know that, and my real name?"

"The same way I know that stupid little Tuxedo Mask over there is really Darien."

"Wha...." stated Darien/Tuxedo Mask.

"Come on, Darien. Everyone knows you're so much cuter when you're evil."

She started to telepathically pull him over to her.

"NOOOOOO!" wailed Sailor Moon.

"Usagi," said Tuxedo Mask, his voice laden with strain. "Go......to......Nephlite's......old...house....." he couldn't say more, because he suddenly faded away.

"YOU!" screamed Sailor Moon, pointing at the lady. "Where is he?! What did you do to him?!"

"Now, now," she replied, drawing two long swords. "It's not polite to point."

One sword had the body of a dragon from the chest up as the handle, the other had the body from the chest down.

"The Dragon Master's Swords!" gasped Luna.

"Wrong, Ms. All Knowing Guardian of the Moon Princess!" she laughed. "They are now the Dragon Mistress's Swords!"

Twirling the swords expertly, the Dragon Mistress prepared to kill Sailor Moon. Before she could strike, a voice in her ear told her to report back to base. "Yes, Amethyst." she muttered to herself. "Farewell for now, Sailors!" she called. "Oh, you too, Usagi." The lady laughed as she faded away.

"THAT was interesting." said Makoto/Sailor Jupiter.

"Scouts," declared Luna. "We need to have a meeting, right now!"

* * *

Once they had detransformed and gotten over to Rei's temple, the meeting commenced. Usagi sat quietly, staring down at her tightly clasped hands with tears coursing openly down her cheeks. Why? she kept asking herself. She hadn't even touched the muffins that Rei's grandfather had brought.

"Well, first things first." said Makoto, getting down to business. "Luna, what did you say about those swords the lady had?"

"There is a legend," Luna began, "About a set of weapons forged by dragonfire and cast from a falling star. The Dragon Master's Swords and, rumor has it, a beautifully carved dagger, The Dragon Master's Dagger. The swords could be joined in two different ways, to create either The Dragon Master's Bow or The Dragon Master's Staff. All weapons are very powerful, and are certainly something to consider. Another thing," she continued. "Is that it seems the Negaverse has begun to capture members of our force and turn them against us, hence Ami, D, and now Darien."

Serena let out a heart-wrenching sob.

"Is there any way to get them back?" asked Minako.

"I'm not certain," Luna replied. "But I think that Darien might have given us a clue."

"Let's go scope it out." declared Makoto.

"I'm gonna sit this one out, guys." said Usagi sadly and quietly.

"You can't!" Makoto objected. "You're our leader!"

"Aw, let her." interrupted Rei. "She'd only get in the way."

"Rei! That was very mean of you!"

"Actually, Makoto," interjected Minako. "I agree with Rei, at least about Usagi sitting out. She should go home and take a rest."

"Alright then, let's go!"

"We shouldn't all go," proclaimed Minako. "How about just me, Rei, and Mako-chan?"

"Works for me." said Rei.

* * *

When they arrived at the abandoned cathedral that had once been Nephlite's home, they noticed a sleek black Lamborghini in the driveway.

"Maybe whoever that belongs to can help us." stated Minako.

As the girls went inside, they couldn't help but feel somewhat frightened.

"Who dares enter my cathedral?" said a voice. The doors slammed shut.

"Who-who's there?" Minako stammered.

"You can't confront anyone like that!" Rei hissed. "Watch and learn. Whoever you are, show yourself, or we'll come and get you!"

"I'd know that yell anywhere." answered the voice. "Rei, is that you?"

"How do you know my name?!"

"Hmm. I guess it's pretty dark in here. Come out on the balcony where we can see each other better."

As the group walked, the voice kept talking.

"I wouldn't have had to scare you if you had knocked."

"Sorry."

They reached the balcony and found themselves alone.

"Would you get out here?!" Rei demanded.

"Certainly."

"Nephlite!"

Minako fainted.

* * *

Hee hee. That was a really good cliffhanger, wasn't it?

* * *

Usagi sat alone at home, looking out her window. She hadn't eaten or talked since she'd left the temple, and didn't notice her mother watching her from the doorway. Her mother was very worried. What could have happened to make her act like this? She wanted to help, but couldn't if Usagi wouldn't tell her what happened. Maybe she'd feel better in the morning. As she walked down the hall, she could hear her daughter break down and cry.

* * *

"Amethyst, why did you stop me from destroying Sailor Moonbitch?"

The Dragon Lady was sitting on the edge of the ruler's throne arm.

"Quite simply, I may want her later."

She giggled.

"Oh, you're so devious, thinking ahead like that. That's why you're so attractive."

"I try. What should I call you, my precious love?"

She giggled again.

"Those Sailors know me as the Dragon Mistress."

"Is that it?"

She sighed.

"Dragon Mistress, Dragon Lady, I don't care what they call me, as long as you know me as Nightshade."

"Very well, then."

* * *

Yes, I am avoiding the Nephlite Subject.

* * *

"Hmm." said Zelgadis.

"What?" asked Lina.

"I was just wondering why Amanda always falls over."

"Hey," interrupted Gourry. "I was just wondering why I always have to poke her with a stick to get her to wake up."

"How odd," replied Lina. "I was just wondering why she always has to make a corny speech."

<She reminds me of Sailor Moon.>

"Who?"

<Never mind. You're cute, Zel.>

He blushed, as much as you can when you have blue skin.

<Rezzo too.>

Lina fainted.

* * *

Yep, I'm stalling. What else can I write? Ah.

* * *

Chibi Usa was chasing Diana. Uh, yeah.

* * *

Kay. That did not work. Oh well. Here's the Nephlite Subject.

* * *

"You're dead!" gasped Makoto.

"No."

"Alright, explanation, now." demanded Rei.

"Fine. When you saw me disappear, I had actually used the last of my strength to transport myself here. Fortunately Darien was here, and he helped me regain my strength. After I recovered, I gave Darien my car and bought the Lamborghini. I guess I wanted to start over. You know, to forget the evil things. How's Molly?"

"She's totally over you, man."

"Good."

"GOOD!?"

"Yes, good. Her accent was really annoying. Is she seeing anyone?"

"Yeah, Melvin."

"Melvin?!"

"Amazing, isn't it?"

"Yes."

"There's this other girl," interrupted Lita. "She really likes you a lot."

"Yeah," Rei replied. "She totally ruffed up Zoycite. Every time she whacked her she yelled stuff like 'this is for Nephlite', or 'and his cute hair'. She even slammed Zoy against the wall, tackled her, and almost choked her to death."

"Almost?"

"Yeah, she stopped because she turned evil or something."

"Oh."

"You know, if we ever got her back she'd probably want to go out with you."

"Really?"

"Totally."

"Well," said Minako, finally waking up. "I guess that explains why Darien has your car."

"Yes."

"So, are you going to help us or not?" Rei asked forcefully.

"I need to think it over. I'm not sure if I want everyone to know I'm still alive, especially if this girl has such a burning desire to kill Zoycite. She might succeed in doing so, and if she does, we won't have to."

"D." stated Minako.

"What?"

"That's her name. D."

"If your not going to help right now," declared Rei. "I guess we'll leave."

"Feel free to visit."

"Do you want us to tell anyone you're here?"

"No. I don't want the Negaverse to find out."

"Uh oh." gasped Minako.

"What?"

"Darien was captured. That means they probably know."

"Not if they used the Dark Crystal. It erases things like that from the person's memory."

"Good."

* * *

When the girls left, they decided to go get something to eat. Rei had declared that the last one there was a rotten egg, so all were dashing in the direction of the cafe. Minako didn't notice the tall man in the black armor until she ran into him. He had long lavender hair and a long thin sword that was in its shiny black case at his side. Minako instantly fell in love.

"Watch it," whispered Rei. "He might be Negaverse."

Minako, dazed with love, looked at the man.

"Are you from the Negaverse?"

The man merely looked confused.

"My name is Pantheos, and I have no idea as to what you are talking about."

Just then Melvin popped up.

"I know you! You're in Final Fantasy VII! I love your website!"

"Yes, and thanks."

"Do you want to go out with me?" asked Minako.

"You are so radiantly beautiful, my dear, I could never say no." answered Pantheos.

"Radiantly beautiful my ass!" said Rei.

"You know," exclaimed Makoto. "He looks like one of my old boyfriends!"

"Ugh!"

* * *

"Now is the perfect time to get rid of that stupid Sailor Moonbitch, while she's all upset over Darien!"

"Yes, Nightshade, but just think what it would do to her if we took two of her closest friends away at the same time."

Nightshade predictably giggled.

"Oh, you're so clever!"

"I know."

"What else I'm sure you know," interrupted Amber. "Is that it won't be as easy now that they know what we're up to."

"Hmm."

* * *

We now take you to Usagi's house, where the girls were all hanging out.

"WAAAH!" yelled Mori. "We don't have a leader!"

"Oh really, Mori, calm down." shushed Shayeena. "D might be gone, but Usagi's still here."

"Like I said, we don't have a leader!"

"Mori! That wasn't nice." reprimanded Minako. "Let's go watch Fantasia."

"Finally! That's it!" announced Shay. "Sailor Fantasia, my new name."

"You are not watching Fantasia now!" screamed Usagi. "Not with the N'Sync concert coming on!"

"Hooray! A new name for me too!" declared Idlyn. "Sailor Sync!"

"Prepare for trouble!"

"And make it double!"

"What was that?" asked Rei.

"To protect the world from devastation!"

"To unite all peoples within our nation!"

"No worry." answered Natalia. "It's just Team Rocket."

"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"

"To extend our reach to the stars above!"

"Who are they?" asked Makoto.

"Jessie!"

"James!"

"Oh."

"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light!"

"Surrender now or prepare to fight!"

"Meeeowth! That's right!"

"Meowth! Get back in my Poke`ball right now!" demanded Nat.

"Meowth, you little traitor!" Jessie yelled, as she often did.

"Sorry, but you guys are stupid." he replied. Meanwhile, Mori had snuck up behind Jessie and James.

"Now I will show two why they call me Chibi Asswhupper!" she shouted, and proceeded to kick both of them in the rear, sending them sailing out of the window.

"Look's like Team Rocket's blasting off agaaaaaaiiiiiin!"

"I told you not to worry." said Nat.

"One thing we do need to worry about," interrupted Luna. "Is the Negaverse.

"Right, Luna!" stated Usagi. "Which is why I've come up with a strategy. We should all be with at least one other person every time we go outside."

"No problem for me." said Mina. "I've got a date with Pantheos." Just then the doorbell rang. "That should be him now." She opened the door. "AAAH!"

* * *

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I love irritating you!

* * *

Nephlite was sitting on his balcony alone. Maybe I should invite someone over, he thought. He went inside to get a drink.

"Hahahahaha! Now I will finish what I have started!"

"What do you want, Zoycite?"

"Merely to finally destroy you!"

"You know, you could've acted your age when you were getting the Rainbow Crystals."

"What do you mean by that?"

"You know very well what I mean." Then in a whiny voice he said, "Give that back, it's mine!"

"Enough talk. Zoy!"

"What a stupid thing to say." replied Nephlite. Another voice interrupted the insults.

"HAhahahahahahaha! Zoycite, I challenge you!"

"Emerald?" asked Nephlite.

"What do you want?" demanded Zoycite in her five-year-old-sounding voice.

"HAhahahahahahaha! To see who has a more annoying laugh. HAhahahahahahaha!"

"Gee wilickerbobs." Nephlite said, rubbing a finger in his ear. "You'd win by a mile, Emerald. How about who's more annoying overall?"

"HAhahahahahahaha! Certainly. That way it's more fair for Zoybitch over there. HAhahahahahahaha!"

As the battle raged on, Nephlite decided to leave.

<Good idea,> said the author. <I think I will too.>

* * *

"Don't start talking to me again!" yelled Zelgadis. "The reader is starting to get really impatient with you."

>Yes, I am.< replied the reader.

<Okay, okay.>

>Thank you.<

* * *

"What are you screaming about?!" yelled Makoto.

"It's, it's-"

"WHAT IS IT?" shrieked everyone.

"Oh, wait, it's just Toast."

"That's it. I'm going for a walk." announced Rei. "Come on, Makoto."

"Okay."

"Don't go in the woods!" called Luna.

"Sure!"

They decided to go to Rei's temple. When they got there, they noticed a woman in a plain black shaped dress with long lavender hair and a black parasol standing by the door.

"Oh, Rei, you're finally here!" she exclaimed. "I've been waiting for you. I need your help. Can you come with me, please?"

"Only if Makoto comes too."

"Certainly."

As they walked, the sky started to get dark.

"Major Nega-vibes." whispered Rei.

"Yeah."

The woman turned around.

"Did you say something?"

"No."

"Oh. I could've sworn I heard you mention the Negaverse."

"Nope."

"Okay."

Makoto looked at Rei.

"She knows what the Negaverse is! That's definitely a bad sign."

"Yes, it is." said the woman. Then she went into a laughing fit.

"Nightshade!"

"Of course. But it doesn't really matter now, does it?" As she spoke, the group was transported to, predictably, a large hall. Before Amber could whip out the Dark Crystal, another voice came from across the hall.

"Is this the way to the VH1 studio?"

"Another strike from PBS?" asked Nightshade.

"No, I'm Bob Dylan."

"AAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

"Should we be scared?" wondered Makoto.

"YES! This is BOB DYLAN! Do you know what that means?!"

"No."

"We should all be running around screaming because this guy annoys the author to the point of insanity!"

"Oh. AAAAAAHHHHHH!" Makoto obliged, but then she noticed that the guy was wearing an orange shirt. Ah HA! She pulled Pikachu out of her pocket.

"PIK!" Bob was instantly toast-FRIED! Fried. We almost called Toast again.

"Yay!" yelled Nightshade. Then she laughed. "Now to finish this!"

* * *

"Well," said Amethyst. "That was easy."

"Yes, your Highness," answered Matrix. "But if they had gone in the woods I would have had my revenge."

"Yeah?" replied the now evil Makoto. "Well, it was that stupid cat Luna that told us not to go there."

"Matrix," Amethyst announced. "I give you permission to eliminate this nuisance yourself."

"I know just the one who can help me, my prince."

"Good."

* * *

Luna was taking a walk through the park to relax, when she was suddenly confronted by Matrix.

"Hello, kitty. I have a friend who's dying to meet you. Slasher!"

A huge purple cat with the longest fangs and claws Luna had ever seen leapt out of a bush. He grinned evilly. Matrix smiled.

"I'll leave you two alone." She disappeared. Slasher advanced, prepared to pounce. Luna saw no way out. As the cat sprung, she attempted to shield herself. At the last possible second, a fish skeleton appeared, stopping Slasher in his tracks. Luna looked up and saw a black cat standing on a wall not too far away. The funny thing was, this cat had a miniature top hat, mask, cape, and bow tie. Luna was thoroughly confused. How odd. He even has a little tuxedo on. She thought. Slasher, however, crouched down, his ears flat against his head. Then he let out a yowl, leapt into a bush, and disappeared.

"They don't usually just run away like that." said the strange cat.

"Who are you?" asked Luna.

"I am Tuxedo Cat! Farewell, Luna, Guardian of the Moon Princess!" and he was gone.

"Hey, Luna!" A voice from behind her caused Luna to turn around. Another voice stated, "That Nega-cat was running from us, you know." Then the owners of the two voices jumped down from the wall that Tuxedo Cat had been standing on.

"Sailor Neptune! Sailor Uranus! What are you two doing here?"

Sailor Uranus smiled.

"We heard that Jupiter and Mars were captured....."

".......So we decided to come and help out a little." Neptune finished.

"Are you two going to talk like that all the time?" demanded Luna.

"We don't usually do this....."

"......Around other people......"

".......Unless we're in a silly mood....."

".......Like right now."

"Great."

"If you'll excuse us......"

".....we're going to go behind those bushes...."

".....and we'll be there awhile, so....

"...catch you later."

* * *

"Amethyst, dear, did you notice that whenever we capture a sailor another one takes their place?"

"Yes, Nightshade, and we need to think of something to do about it."

"It would also be a marvelous idea, your majesty, to bring in larger quantities all at once."

"Hmmm."

* * *

Now it's time for the next scout meeting.

"Everyone," Luna announced. "Sailors Neptune and Uranus-"

"Michiru and Hot Buns." corrected Michiru/Sailor Neptune with a smile.

"Michiru and Hot Buns-"

"I really prefer Haruka coming from other people." interrupted Hot Buns/Sailor Uranus.

"Michiru and HARUKA have come to help us deal with the Negaverse, and earlier today I met-" The temple doors bursting open interrupted her. A small top-hat-and-caped silhouette appeared in the sunlight. "-him." Luna finished.

"I am Tuxedo Cat, and I am here to protect you, Sailor Moon!"

Usagi voiced the question that was on everyone's mind. "Are you Darien's will to protect me that was separated from his body because he is unable to do it himself like that Moonlight Knight guy?"

"No. I am his Cat Guardian."

"He has one?"

"All scouts do." Luna answered. "It's just that some of them either aren't needed or haven't been found yet."

"Found yet."

"Now what?!" exclaimed Usagi.

"What."

"Not to worry, Usagi-chan!" Tuxedo Cat assured her. "I found a small child on the way here. She means no harm."

"No harm." A little girl about three years old with reddish pink hair walked into the room.

"Aww, how cute." Usagi said. "What's your name, little girl?"

"Chibi Chibi."

"What kind of a name is that?"

"Is that."

"AARRRGGG!!!!"

"Listen," interrupted Michiru. "Me and Hot Buns are going to go take a tour of the city. We'll see you later. Bye!"

"Bye!" shouted Chibi Chibi.

* * *

Amethyst was still thinking when he heard a knock on his palace door. He made sure his dagger was hidden on the underside of the table, then called "Come in!" Two female shapes, one seeming very masculine, were framed in the doorway.

"We will leave our weapons by this door to prove that we are here to talk peace, o mighty Dark Prince."

I like their way of thinking. thought Amethyst. Out loud he said, "Step into my palace so that we may talk."

"As you wish." As they walked in, they shut the door behind them. Amethyst could now see that one figure had wavy sea green hair down to her shoulders and that the other had very short tan hair.

"Who are you and what do you want?" asked the prince.

"I am Michiru and this is Hot Buns."

"Michi, please. Haruka!"

"Oh, sorry. Anyway, we wish to join you because you are certainly much more powerful than the Sailor Scouts, who we just happen to be joined up with at the moment." The evil ruler needed to be sure.

"If you are Sailor Scouts, transform."

"If you say, we will do, your highness. Neptune Planet Power!"

"Uranus Planet Power!" There they were, in their uniforms.

"Hmmm. If you really desire to join the Negaverse, you won't mind me using the Dark Crystal on you."

"Of course not." replied Uranus. "But we had an idea that would help you, and it won't work after you use the crystal."

"We figured you would want to capture more scouts in less time," Michiru stated. "So we thought we could lure some here before they knew we were with you."

"Excellent idea. Carry out this plan of yours."

"Certainly." The pair detransformed and left.

"Did someone order carry-out?" asked Amber.

"Not really, but it sounds like a good idea."

"I have an idea as well, my lord." Matrix said, appearing in the air in front of them. "Why not create an entire army of cats like Slasher?"

"What's to lose? Go ahead, Matrix. This will be your project."

* * *

Meanwhile, Artemis had decided to make his presence known. "I haven't said or done anything in this entire story!" the white cat yelled.

"I know what you could do," declared Haruka, just coming back. "Why don't you and Tuxedo Cat go look for the other cat guardians?"

"Good idea. Let's go!"

"I know what the rest of us can do," announced Michiru. "We found this really cool place that we could all hang out at. Let's go there!"

"I can't." replied Usagi. "I'm grounded for punching my little brother."

"Then why are you here?" wondered Haruka.

"This is the only place I'm allowed to go other than school."

"It's summer."

"Oh yeah. Anyway, you guys go ahead."

"Guess what?" asked Vicky.

"What?"

"Chicken butt."

"I'm leaving!"

"Us too." said Nat. "Us newer scouts are going over to Kat's to watch Slayers."

"Well, Minako, Hotaru, Setsuna," stated Michiru. "You guys can still come."

"Sure."

As they walked along, Minako noticed that they were in a part of Tokyo she'd never been to before. "Just where are we going?" she asked.

"We'll be there in......now." answered Haruka. Everyone had been teleported to a dark courtyard.

"I decided to do something different this time." said Amethyst, coming out of a door. "Wonderful work, Michiru and Hot Buns."

"Erm," started Haruka.

"You're with him! yelled Minako.

"Soon we all will be." replied Michiru.

"CHIIIIBIIIII!"

"Oh no!" screamed Minako. "Chibi Chibi followed us!"

"Hmm. She will need to get older if we are going to have her on our force."

"Although, your highness," declared Amber, walking out the door to stand next to the prince. "It may be useful to have a child around."

"Good point."

* * *

Usagi was walking home when she was confronted by all the scouts that had disappeared (in uniform), plus Tuxedo Mask and the scouts that had gone with Hot Buns {HARUKA DAMN YOU!} and Michiru.

"You're all back!" shouted Usagi. She ran over to hug Tuxedo Mask, but stopped when she noticed the look in his eyes. In fact, all of the scouts had a weird look in their eyes. "What's going on? Are you all mad at me?"

Tuxedo Mask laughed, twirled his cape and stood before her in his black Prince Darien armor.

"I am back where I truly belong-with the Negaverse! Along with your friends, obviously."

"You all look so different." Usagi replied, dazed.

"Of course we do, dumbass Moonbitch!" yelled D, stepping forward. "We ditched your sorry ass for the Negaverse!" She crossed her arms and a strong wind blew, forcing Usagi to shut her eyes. When it died down, she looked up and saw The Dragon Lady in D's place. "By the way, Failure Moonbitch, I am Nightshade, not The Dragon Lady, and I have a much cuter boyfriend than you!" Amethyst appeared, standing next to Nightshade.

"I am Amethyst, Ruler of the Negaverse, and beautiful Nightshade is my queen."

"Sorry to interrupt," Rei said, stepping forward. "But I believe you have made a mistake, my queen. Usagi doesn't have a boyfriend."

"How silly of me." laughed Nightshade. "Anyway, Amethyst, let's leave." The couple disappeared.

"By the way, Ms. Always Late, I'm not Rei anymore." Rei was suddenly surrounded by a pillar of fire. When it faded away, a black-haired woman in red leather was in her place. Twirling her leather jacket to show off the leopard patterned lining, she walked over to Prince Darien. "I'm Ember, and Darien is my boyfriend now." This happy couple also faded out. Makoto stepped up.

"I could kick your ass right now." she bragged. A bolt of lightning struck in front of her, and when it left there was a green haired and green outfitted woman standing there.

"How dare you copy my hair!" screamed Jessie, running up from behind Usagi. "I'm going to-"

"Going to what?" the lady interrupted, sending a lightning bolt crashing down on Jessie. "My name's Electra, and don't take nothing from nobody. I'm outta here." Ami came walking up.

"You've seen me already. You just don't know it yet." In a swirl of snow, she became Arctica.

"No wonder your voice sounded familiar!" Usagi shouted. Arctica left. The others decided to keep theirs short.

"No longer am I Saturn. I am Stargazer!"

"No longer am I Pluto. I am Pandora!"

"No longer am I Neptune. I am Typhoon!"

"No longer am I Uranus. I am The Guardian!"

"No longer am I Venus. I am Breeze!"

"Pantheos led you into a trap, didn't he?!" Usagi screamed at Venus. No reply came, other than a whole bunch of attacks. "AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!" Then Serena woke up. Luna was trapped under her arm.

"Get off of me!" the cat yelled.

"Sorry, Luna. It's just that I was having this horrible dream...." she told Luna the whole thing. Suddenly four different voices could be heard switching off phrases from a darkened corner.

"Well, maybe it....."

".....wasn't a dream but....."

".....a flashback or a premonition....."

".....of things to come."

"Great." said Luna. "A repeat of Haruka and Michiru's performance."

"Actually, no. They....."

".....were copying us.....

".....because they aren't creative....."

".....like we are."

"Who are you, anyway, and why are you in my room?" Usagi demanded.

"We are....."

".....the Asteroid Scouts....."

".....come to help you....."

".....since your friends are gone." Four girls with really freaky hair in sailor suits came out of the corner.

***