Written by: KLMeri
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, though I would love to! ^_^ All the credit goes to Bandai, Sunrise, and Sotsu Agency. If someone wants to sue, then I cannot stop you, but I will warning you. I have nothing that would benefit you what-so-ever. In fact, why don't you give me something! ^_~
This is another story in which I just sat down at my computer and began typing, and it came to me. It is uncompleted, but since people seem to like my fanfiction, I decided to give everyone a peek at it! I would like to know what the readers think!
A young woman began to stumble backwards at the impact of the bullet, ripping through her delicate skin. Her eyes widen and then slowly shut as she welcomed the surrounding darkness. Her companion lunged forward to catch her falling body. He called out her name loudly, urgently as he shook her, trying, hoping for a response. He gathered her body close to his, slowly rocking back and forth, crying softly. Steadily, the tears cascaded down his face.
"Don't leave me, Noin. Please. Please! Noin!" he repeated, calling to her, beckoning, begging.
The madness, the terror, palpable and so powerful in all its glory, swirled through the air as people rushed away, always more concerned with their lives, themselves. The shrieking of bombs and firing rifles mixed in with the chaos, urging it to destroy all in its path. The frightened child frantically searched for her parents, a neighbor, someone to cling to. She was running, pushed along by the masses of people trying to escape the horror and bloodshed. A man screamed somewhere in the crowd as his aching legs gave out and he fell to the ground, being shoved and pushed until he disappeared among those fleeing. He reached out a hand crying for help, but the screams, the wind, carried it away, banishing its existence. The girl had seen him though. She had wanted so badly to take his hand, comfort him, comfort herself. The people around her kept going, never a backward glance and she knew to slow down was death, the same fate the man had had. She drove herself onward, farther, ignoring the pain throughout her body.
Zechs leaned against the wall. He wanted to hit something, to take out his pain on anyone or anything, to take away her pain. For hours, he had been waiting for news of her condition. And he would continue to wait. He sighed and slowly rubbed his tired face. The atomsphere in the hospital was dreary, the signs of death lingering behind closed doors. Zechs pushed off from the wall and walked around, stretching his tense muscles. He needed privacy, somewhere to sort out his mixed feelings. The sound of footsteps echoed from down the hall, moving in his direction. Zechs stiffened and immediately became alert. His hand instinctively reached down towards his holster, only to sink into emptiness, helplessly. The person was closer now, having stopped about two feet away. Zechs emitted a low growl and spun around to face the intruder.
The doctor took a step backwards in fear. "Uh...Hello..." he stuttered,"Are you the one who brought in the gunshot victim?"
"Are you the doctor?" Zechs answered. He didn't care if he sounded cold. He didn't have time for this, dammit. He wanted to see Noin now. She was the only thing that mattered.
The man gave a nervous laugh. "I am."
Zechs just stared at him, a frightening look on his face.
"Take me to Noin."
The doctor judged him for a moment. "Follow me." This guy didn't even ask how she is doing. Unusual. No, weird.
She had managed to escape from the mob of people. It had taken a lot of her energy to fight her way to the side streets, away from the confusion. She had to find her parents. They needed her; she needed them. The little girl shivered as the coldness seeped through her thin garments. The bright afternoon had turned into night, pitch black because of the smoke from burning homes, destroyed lives. Only the moonlight provided some solace to the frightened child as she wandered through the alleys. She had been traveling back to the place where she was sure her parents were, home. They just had to be there. The streets had become quieter, the occasional hum of an airplane or jet overhead disturbing the silence. Fires illuminated the destruction and dead bodies that littered the city.
She tried to huddled deeper into her clothes. She kept her vision towards the ground, near her feet. Noin took slow breaths, as if trying to breathe as least as possible of the tainted air. She tried to think of home, the comforting feel of her mother's arms, gently rocking her to sleep, protecting her. Then to look up and see her father smiling at her and nod his head ever-so-slightly, saying quietly everything was okay. A drop of water fell onto her hand, and she stared at it in fascination, watching more drops land and slide down her hand onto the ground. She realized then she was crying, tears falling in sorrow and longing, in fear. Quickly she wiped the tears away, willing them to stop. She mustn't cry; she should be strong, like her father would tell her to be.
He gently leaned down and took her hand in his, slowly testing it, as if would break at any moment. Zechs looked up at her face, that beautiful, angelic face. He parted his lips as if to utter something, but found that his throat constricted, only a short wisp of air escaping. Quietly, the doctor watched from the doorway, but Zechs took no notice of him.
Noin. My lovely Noin, what...what have I done? What have I done? Zechs squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to block out the image of Noin lying there. She was firm in everything thing she did. Noin the brave. Noin the unflappable. Here. Helpless. He felt overwhelmed by the sudden tide of emotions. He was angry with himself; no, he hated himself.
"You really love her, don't you," the doctor observed.
Zechs just bowed his head lower. Love? No. If he loved her, he would have strived to keep her safe, to shelter her from the horror of war, of life. He had not done this, her still form was proof alone of his failure. How dare he call it love! He always took from her, used her, clung to her like a child would to its mother. No, he thought, you do not destroy the one love.
Quickly, Zechs bent down and kissed her forehead. He placed her hand by her side, and stared at the motionless body before whispering into her ear, "I will be waiting."
The doctor straightened up and spoke, "You're leaving?! Now? But..." He stopped and regarded Zechs's expression. "Fine. Fine. How shall I contact you, if necessary?"
Zechs dismissed the question with a wave of his hand, and left the room.
Just one block left. One more. Home isn't that far now. Noin felt so tired, her body swayed slightly for a moment. Home. Mom. Dad. Leaning on part of a building wall, she put a hand to her head to stop the on-coming wave of dizziness. "Noin! Just stop it! Don't be weak. Keep going," she told herself, repeating it over and over. Slowly but steadily with firm concentration, she willed her body to move. One step. Two step. Left foot. Right foot. Keep going.
Noin trudged around the corner to the beginning of a street. She lifted her head to survey the surroundings and gasped. Fires, that were burning the remaining structures of what once were beautiful homes, lit the night, casting an orangy glow on the concrete. No, this couldn't be it! It mustn't be! The neighborhood she once ran through, laughing with the neighboring children, playing catch, enjoying her life, was gone. She then began to run, faster and faster. Surely her home was still there! A chance, there was a chance. Noin fled down the street, hoping, believing she would see her little house sitting there, and her family watching from the window, waiting.
He tilted his head upwards. The sun shone down on the Earth, sending a burning sensation throughout his entire body. Pentrating him, searing his soul. Zechs had always enjoyed the feel of the sun's caresses, a slight tickle. Now...but now he felt nothing, just the intensity. He invited it to take him, reach out to him, and rid him of his pain, his guilt. Take his very essence and crush it. To leave no trace of Zechs Merquise.
The child stood in shock, staring at the remnants of her home, her childhood. Destroyed. Lost in the flames forever. She felt tears once again slip down her face, and made no move to wipe them away. Let them fall, she thought. For her parents. For herself. For her loss, everyone's loss. Noin slowly sank to her knees, and wrapping her thin arms around her body. Sliently, she cried. You're a joy to my life. Noin's mother had said this to her once. Noin let the memories wash over her, each one bringing a fresh, strangled sob. Never again would she hear her mother's soft voice. Or her father's gentle, yet stern one. They were gone. The war...no, war itself had claimed them.
The way people stared at him when he walked by was feeding his anger. Some had tried to approach him, wanting to show their sympathy about Noin; some accused him, not outloud, but with their eyes. He would look at them, slightly sneer, and walk off. Zechs began to walk towards his office. He knew the huddled group in the hall was talking about the accident, wondering about it. Zechs walked by and suddenly the conversation halted. The people looked down at their hands, afraid to meet his cold gaze.
If Noin had been there, she would have laughed and lightly slapped Zech's back, saying to the people he wasn't about to kill them. They inturn would laugh at their silliness, grin like fools, and shake Zechs's hand. Zechs would have loudly commented to Noin that she was ruining his image, earning a grin from her. Immediately, he banished the memory from his mind. Work. Just think of work. He quickly closed the remaining distance to his office, leaving behind the uncomfort, the guilt.
She felt warm, incredibly warm and sticky. She tilted her head slightly upwards, eyes still shut, and daintly sniffed the air. Ammonia, she thought as it registered in her mind. With...something...something sweet, yes...sweet and heavy. She parted her lips and released a soft breath. Gently, she drew in the surrounding air, testing it. Satisfied, Noin hastily opened her eyes. A rush of sunlight meet her, temporarily obscuring her vision.
"Zechs?" she called out softly. Only silence greeted her. Noin removed her hand and sighed. She did not attempt to move, just lay there listening to the empty room. Zechs, where are you? A tear sparkled at the corner of her eye, unwilling to fall alone, yet knowing it was fate.
Zechs had tried time and time again to concentrate, but it was in vain. Noin, she was all he thought of, all he saw, felt, and heard. He had long ago excepted that his work would go uncomplete. What does it matter anyway? My ideas are nothing, he thought. He closed his tired eyes. Zechs could picture Noin, leaning against his desk and scolding him for not having faith in himself. She always tried to make him see things in himself that he once would have deemed impossible. Things like his kindness. His humanity. Once...once, he thought he saw a glimpse, a peek at something wonderful...and it was inside him.
Now, he realized, believed that what it was, or could have been, was never meant to be. It was like it was in a display case, to be looked upon and wished for, but forever locked away. With Noin, he could pretend, act like he was just as she was, innocence.
A quiet knock sounded on the closed office door. Zechs, no longer comtemplating, turned around to stare at the door. He made no move or sound, just watched it carefully. Again another rap came, more urgent this time.
"Umm...excuse me, Sir, but you have a call." A rather short woman spoke from the other side of the door. She dressed in plain office clothes, not wishing to attract more trouble than she felt she could handle on the first day. She leaned closer and began to talk louder, "It is from the hospital. I could tell them to call b..."
The door flew open, startling the lady and causing her to cling to the door frame for balance, or at least that's what she thought she grabbed. Cautiously opening her eyes, she found she was attached to a man's rather large coat. Her eyes grew wider upon her first sight of Zechs Merquise. She latched on tighter to his clothes, studying his features and began to drool. She flushed at the wild look in Zechs's eyes. "Tell them I'm on my way," he spoke in a
hurry as he managed to detached her grip on his Preventor's jacket. She slowly turned around to watch Zechs turn the corner.
Starry-eyed and panting, she muttered to herself, "I wonder if he's taken."
Noin listened to the silence that greeted her ears. She embraced the lonely feeling in her heart. Face it, she thought, you are meant to be alone. She had hoped that when the war ended, it would, in a way, give back what it had taken, her family. Not that she believed her parents would come back, but that a new start would be waiting. People waiting for her to began life with them. She had wished that Zechs would be waiting. How stupid to hope for such a thing! He prefers a life of solitude. He does not need me.
Love has made me blind, she thought with growing sadness. I have given him my heart, and he doesn't want it. Her hand trailed to the place where her heart lay. She felt empty inside.
Noin, Zechs thought as he watched people rushing to and fro from the taxi window. They were hurrying to get home, for night was approaching, bringing with it troubling weather. Yet, there was no fear in the air; it had flown away in the passing winds of war. He saw the happy expressions, the smiles on the faces of strangers as the automobile passed them by. He had fantasized of the pleasure, the sensation of being carefree. It tempted him in his most vunerable hours, in his dreams. He rolled down the window and stared at the darkening sky. Peace. This peace was fought for so that these people may never again experience the cruelty of war. They are given the chance to live in happiness. But what about the children of war? What becomes of us? Zechs sliently questioned the stars.
I should leave. There is no reason to stay. Never had someone given her one. They didn't bother to care. Even after the war, all the sacrificies many people had made, humanity still lacked the compassion and willingness for true peace. Yes, at the moment mankind's future looks promising, but it will never be stable. Humans still remain opposed to really changing their ways. Abandoning all familiarity will never be an option. Humans are too insecure, too greedy.
Instead, they comfort each other with words, empty promises. Some people who truely believe they are obtaining peace, people like Relena Peacecraft, refuse to see the bare facts. Yet, they create temporary peace. This peace blooms, but like a true flower, eventually withers away. But it does not die in vain; a seed is left behind. To this seed, humans give great value. They take with them this symbol, not into their hearts, but into their hands. They claim it will be heaven itself to have. At the same time it is treasured, it is used to for intentionial harm. This seed destroys many souls before it yields a vision of beauty. Eventually, it is nutured into short-lived peace. This is the enigmatic and cursed cycle of all humanity.
Noin clung to this present peace. She felt unable to stand without it. It gave her a reason to fight, to live. She followed it blindly, but willingly. She was one of the few who had given everything so that life may be a little easier. She aided in its creation. Noin was determined to see it grow into something radiant, however momentary it may be. She made up her mind. Duty calls.
He quickly paid the cab driver to headed into the lobby of the hospital. Visitors had left hours ago. Zechs pushed the elevator button again and again impatiently. As the doors began to open, Zechs braced his feet and shoved them apart faster. The elevator doors released an unpleasant groan in complaint. A man dressed in casual wear from inside the elevator stared at him oddly, and quickly exited befoe he got trapped with a lunatic. He recognized trouble when he saw it.
Hurry up! Move it, dammit! Zechs commanded to the elevator. He gripped the railing, and peered at the controls, looking for a speed button of some sort. The sooner he got to Noin, the quicker he could bury his guilt. He needed to know that she was okay. He wanted to hear her say those words.
She picked up her Preventor jacket, and looked at it thoughtfully. It still had the blood stains on it. She lightly picked at the hole where the bullet had entered, unraveling the loose fabric. She smiled faintly, and tossed the jacket over her arm. Noin lifted her head slightly higher, and relaxed her body. It's time to go.
Earlier, she and the doctor had a little falling out. He insisted she should stay. He casually mentioned that he had contacted Zechs, and pointed out that he would probably be on the way. She cursed under her breath. Noin decided that if she was going to do this, she had better get moving, and fast. Finally, he said he would not try to stop her.
As she prepared to leave the room she had briefly occupied, the doctor watched from the doorway. It was against his better judgement to let his patients go uncared for. No, this will not look good if I want to be Chief of Surgery. What kind of reputation am I giving myself? This woman is stubborn as hell! He sighed. And it's her right to refuse treatment. Damn. He resisted the urge to once again ask her to stay. He looked down the hall nervously. If that crazy bastard ever gets here, he's going to rip me limb from limb.
Finally! He had arrived on the third floor. Zechs straightened and waited for the elevator doors to open.
Noin stood at the end of the hall. She watched as the light reached the number three. About time! Shifting her weight to her other foot, she waited for the doors of the elevator to open.
Zechs came barreling out of the elevator as Noin tried to rush into it. By the time either became aware of that someone was in their path, it was too late. They both crashed into each other full force, and went down in a tangle of arms and legs onto the floor. Two nurses nearby stood rooted to the floor in surprise, with their mouths hanging open. They had never dealt with actual emergencies, just tended to patients in bed.
Zechs scrambled onto his knees, back turned with a growl rumbling in his chest. Noin had reacted the same way when she was shot. She squeezed her eyes shut against the excruciating pain. Zechs cursed and gracefully twisted his body around to yell at the 'nitwit' who had blocked his path. The anger died in his throat as Zechs saw Noin stretched out on the floor.
"Noin?" he carefully tested the word, shock vibrating the sound. Zechs released his breath and crawled towards her.
Noin's eyes flew open in surprise. That voice...No...No! It couldn't be. She felt strong arms wrap around her, pulling upwards. "Zechs," she softly stated. Noin fought off the tears, and looked up at him.
"Oh God Noin, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me," he begged as his voice broke.
Damn. The past is already starting to haunt me, she thought. I should have known. Noin let out a dry laugh, and immediately regretted it. Zechs stared at her.
"You're...You're laughing at me?"
"No, no! I just thought that..." she trailed off, thinking of a good excuse. "That it was funny that we ran into each other." Lame, she scolded herself. This is not in the least bit funny. It's embarassing. I have been caught. She quickly changed the subject. "Help me up."
Zechs pulled them both into a standing position. His arms remained gripped around her waist. "Are you okay?"
"Yes," she lied. He closed his eyes and sighed in relief as a heavy burden disappeared from his shoulders. He rested his head against hers, seeking the comfort that he always felt she had.
She's okay, he reveled in satisfaction. Though, I'm sure that fall didn't help. I was in a rush to get to her ro... Noin felt Zechs stiffen, and she recoiled backwards. Damn. Here he goes, she thought as she watched his expression change.
"Noin," he said as his jaw tightened and his eyes lit into a blue flame. "why were you out here?"
She opened her mouth to reply, but he quickly drowned her out.
"Nevermind that. What the hell were you thinking? You don't need to be moving around! You've been shot for Chrissake!" Zechs scolded her like she was a little child.
"Zechs, don't talk so loud!" she whispered harshly, but he didn't slow down.
He grabbed her roughly by the arms. "What is the matter with you?!"
She shoved Zechs away, and slapped him hard. "What the hell is the matter with you?!" she shot back. "Who the hell do you think you are! You've
already hurt me enough!" she screamed at him. Noin turned and ran for the stairwell as the tears began to stream down her face.
Zechs stood in the hallway, a hand to his bruised cheek with pain and confusion written all over his face. He quickly recovered and began to follow her, but a hand lightly rested on his shoulder.
"Don't." the doctor commanded. Zechs turned towards him in anger, and the doctor paled, but did not back down. "She has been through a lot. Give her time to recollect herself."
Zechs resisted the urge to flatten the little man. He looked back at the stairway door, and attempted to gain control of his rampaging emotions. He shook off the doctor's hand.
"Fine."
