A Christmas Carol: DBZ Style

NOTE: This, of course, is the story written by Charles Dickens. I do not take any credit in the original story line, or the DragonBall Z characters that are used to portray the characters in “A Christmas Carol.” This fanfic will follow the story line of the novel, though it will be changed a little to keep the DBZ humor. :)

Clearing his throat, the Narrator-Cell-looks up. “Welcome one and all…never mind all that. I’m going to quickly tell all of you pathetic humans the story of a cold hearted, ruthless, unforgiving, ignorant, shrewd, money happy…you get the picture…man named Vegeta Scrooge.” Cell takes a few steps forward and steps in a pile of snow. He looks at it and mumbles to himself. “Anyway, this story takes place here…err…in the city of London. Scrooge will be on his way to work. He used to be partners with the late Frieza Marley, owning their own fighting arena. Now, I think I told you everything you need to know to begin with, so you can figure everything else out until I come back.”

As the narrator said, Scrooge makes his way to work. He pushes his way through the crowd of people without acknowledging them in the least way. Dressed in all black, Scrooge was a man on the short side, with tall black hair, and cold, dark black eyes. His face usually displayed an unloving scowl.

The towns people watched as the shrewd man walks up the steps to the front door of “Marley and Scrooge.” Scrooge turned around and glared at the people who quickly returned to their lives. “Humbug,” he said to himself and went inside.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Scrooge, sir,” said Goku Cratchit, the second ranked fighter of the small company.

Scrooge walked past the man without a care and entered his own office. At first he didn’t noticed the old man sitting in a chair by the desk. Scrooge hung up his coat and sat down at his desk. He eyed the bald man in front of him. “Goku Cratchit!” He called.

Cratchit quickly appeared at the door. “Yes, sir?”

“Who is this?” Scrooge asked sternly.

“This is Mr. Roshi, sir. He’s here to discuss his…position in this year’s tournament,” Cratchit said looking at the old man, knowing the outcome of the visit.

Mr. Roshi stood up. “I know you’re a busy man, Mr. Scrooge, but I have had some trouble training, it being Christmas time and all…”

“I have no time to hear your petty excuses,” Scrooge said as he stood up and approached the old man. He picked Roshi up by the collar and brought him to the door. Still holding Roshi, Scrooge opened the door and gave him a quick crash landing into the snow. Slamming the door behind him, Scrooge turned around to find the other fighters watching. “Get back to work!” He yelled and they quickly did.

It wasn’t long before Scrooge sat down again when Goku Cratchit appeared in the doorway. Goku was much taller than Scrooge was, his hair black and sticking out in several directions. However, though his eyes were also black, they were soft and loving. “If you’d excuse me, sir,” he started. “The fighting staff would like it if the heat could be turned up just a bit.”

Scrooge looked up slowly to Cratchit. “How dare you ask for such a thing. It’s not their position to decide how high the temperature is. Now get back to work!” Goku looked at Scrooge for a moment and then returned to his work.

An hour later or so, the front door opens and a tall, cheery man in his twenties walks in. “Merry Christmas, Uncle!” The man says.

“Christmas…humbug!” Scrooge says back without looking up. “What business do you have, nephew. And if it’s none at all, you might as well leave.”

“I do have some business Uncle, though I’m sure you won’t think of it as that. I came to wish my favorite uncle a very happy Christmas holiday, and to invite you to my house for Christmas dinner. Videl is preparing a wonderful meal, that I’m sure you’ll love,” Gohan said.

“My dear nephew…I have no interest in you pathetic Christmas traditions. You spend Christmas the way you wish, and let me do the same,” Scrooge said, still not giving any eye contact to his nephew.

Just as Scrooge was finishing his sentence, the front door opened once again. This time two men came in bundled up in winter attire.

“Now what?” Scrooge says looking up at the two men.

“Excuse me,” said a short, bald man. “My name is Krillin, and this is Yamcha,” he introduced.

“We’re from the Capsule Charity Foundation,” Yamcha said.

“We were wondering if Mr. Scrooge would like to make a donation to the poor and homeless for the holiday season,” Krillin finished.

Gohan smiled and greeted the two men. “I’m sure my uncle will be delighted to make a donation for such a good cause, won’t you uncle? Now I must be running off. Take care Uncle!” Gohan hung a wreath on the front door and left.

Scrooge continued his work. Krillin cleared his throat and hoped for an answer. Scrooge looked up in disgust that the two were still there. “Oh yes,” he started. “I’ll be happy to help you out…” He slowly walked over to the two gentlemen. “I’ll help you the door!”

“Never mind,” Yamcha said. “We can find it ourselves.”

“We wouldn’t want to waste anymore of his majesty’s time,” Krillin said coldly and they left.

Scrooge followed them to the door and slammed it behind them. He then heard singing coming from outside. He opened the door and found a short caroler with a white face standing on the steps. “Shut up!” Scrooge yelled. He slammed the door once again and then noticed the wreath. He took it down, tore it up, and threw it outside, hitting the small caroler in the head.

Soon night fell and it was closing time. Goku Cratchit and the fighting staff once again approached Scrooge’s office. “What is it now?” Scrooge asked.

“It appears to be closing time, sir,” Goku pointed out.

“Very well. I’ll see you all early tomorrow at eight o’clock.”

The fighters started to talk amongst themselves. Goku cleared his throat. “If you please, Mr. Scrooge, tomorrow’s Christmas Day.”

“Eight-thirty then,” Scrooge said.

“To be honest, we would like the whole day,” Cratchit said boldly.

Scrooge raised his eyebrows. “The entire day? I can see that I must be the only logical person on this planet. I’m the only one that does not waste an entire day getting no work done. Take the blasted day off then.”

“Thank you, sir,” Goku Cratchit said happily. All but Scrooge cleared their areas and put things away.

The narrator steps into the scene. “Scrooge was left alone for another two hours. Finally he decided to wrap it up for the night. He put on his coat and left, locking the door behind him. The streets were deserted now, everyone spending time with their families on that cold Christmas Eve. He walked through the snow-covered streets to his own home on the far end of town. And I’m freezing out here and there’s no need for me to tell you that he’s going to bed when he gets inside.”

Scrooge walked up the front steps of his house and searched his pockets for the keys. When he finally found them, he put them in the lock and glanced at the doorknocker in front of him. It seemed to be changed shape before his eyes. He blinked and it was back to normal. As he removed the key and placed it back in his pocket, the knocker took on the shape of a familiar face. “Scrooge!” It yelled at him. Scrooge backed away and blinked again. He examined the door and it was as it always was. “Humbug…” he said and went inside.

Scrooge lit a candle and slowly walked up the stairs to his bedroom. He kept the rest of the house dark, for that is the way he preferred it. After checking all of the rooms to ease his conscience, he prepared a small meal of four chicken sandwiches, a plate of cheese, an apple pie, a bowl of pasta, a few rolls, and a large glass of juice. He sits himself down in front of the fireplace in his bedroom and eats.

The room was silent until the small bell hanging over the mantel started to ring. Scrooge looked up and watched as the bell stopped ringing. He could sense a light coming from behind him. He got up and turned around to see a white light and white smoke coming from nowhere.

All of the sudden a figure popped out of the floor. The person was white and purple in some spots, but was still a ghostly figure. He wore several chains around his body and he laughed at the sight of Scrooge before him. “Vegeta Scrooge, still the old fighter and money happy man I knew in life.”

Scrooge looked at the person before him. “Frieza Marley? Is that really you?”

“Yep,” he said floating in the air.

“So it was you on the door earlier, wasn’t it?”

“Yep. I’ve come to warn you,” Marley said.

“About what? That there’s a blizzard coming?” Scrooge joked.

“No, Scrooge. I was an ignorant man,” Marley explained. “I took money from the people who couldn’t afford to even buy enough food for their families. I was doomed to an afterlife of misery and suffering. These chains are the sins that I have formed over the years and never bothered to make right.”

“What does this have to do with me?”

“You’ll end up just like me if you don’t bother to correct your past and free your future. You’re doomed if you don’t!”

“I don’t believe you,” Scrooge said crossing his arms. “You always made a fool of me in life. You’re probably just a figment of my imagination. Soon I will wake up in that chair and you’ll have never been.”

“Think what you want,” Marley said. “You were always a stupid monkey.”

“Stop calling me names!” Scrooge yelled.

“You will be haunted by three ghosts, the first appearing when the clock strikes one.”

“What are you talking about?”

“When the clock strikes one…” Marley repeated as he faded back into the floor.

“Scrooge was once again left alone in his chambers,” Cell says. “He looks at the clock, it not being long before one o’clock. He crawls into bed and tries to fall asleep, but is unable to get the so-called figment of his imagination out of his head.” The clock started to chime one. “And...uh…yeah, well he’s on his own for now.”

The chime forced Scrooge’s eyes open. He lay in his bed and held his breath for a moment. Soon nothing happened, and he decided it was all just a dream. However, a bright light forced him to sit up and jump out of bed. The light dimmed down and a short, purple skinned man with a white mohawk stood before him.

“Who are you?” Scrooge asked unsure of what to think.

“I am Kaioshin, the Ghost of Christmas Past,” he said. “I will be taking you on a journey.”

“You’re a ghost? You don’t look like one…” Scrooge said.

“I am,” the spirit said. “Please follow me.” The spirit walked over to the window and held up his hand, the window opening.

“What are you doing?” Scrooge asked.

“I told you already. You are coming on a journey with me. Now please, take my hand.”

“I don’t want to go on any…” A mysterious force pulled Scrooge towards the window. Kaioshin took his hand and they were lifted in the air and flew out of the house. Kaioshin and Scrooge flew to a bright light in the sky and soon were engulfed by it.

When Scrooge opened his eyes, he found himself in a place he hadn’t seen since he was a child. “This is…I can’t believe this. How’d you do that?” Scrooge asked taking a step forward and watching the children sparing.

“These are the shadows of your past. You recognize this place then,” Kaioshin said.

“Of course…this was the first place I had trained myself as a boy.” The two went inside the building and saw that no one was inside. Except, however, a boy of about twelve years old that was lifting weights. “This is where I decided that I’d be the best fighter in the world, and no one would be better.”

A tall, long white haired man coming through a back door interrupted Scrooge’s memories. “Vegeta, don’t you want to take a break and play with the others?” He asked.

“No. I must train to be best. I will not rest now.”

“Very well. But it is Christmas Eve. Everyone will soon be leaving to go home.”

“Good for them. I’m staying,” the young Scrooge informed.

“Come,” Kaioshin said. “There’s still much you should see.”

The bright light blinded Scrooge again. Now he found himself standing before an old fighting arena. “This is King Kai’s Fighting Arena. Only the best fighters came here…” Scrooge said as he approached a window. He peered in and remembered the night. “It’s the old guy’s Christmas Party. He had this every year and even invited people who were not worthy of the word warrior.”

“But there’s something special that happened…” Kaioshin said. They both walked into the building and observed the party before them. Scrooge walked around, seeing people he hadn’t seen in years. He noticed the young Frieza Marley laughing at two children trying to fight.

Scrooge turned around to find himself when he was a young man. A short, heavy man with round sunglasses walked up to his past self. “Vegeta, try to enjoy yourself. It’s a party! Have some fun!”

“Of course, King Kai,” the young Vegeta replied.

“Oh yes,” King Kai said. He waved over a young woman with blue hair to come over. “Vegeta, this is Bulma…” Scrooge watched as the introductory of Bulma was made. He remembered it well.

“Time grows short, Vegeta,” Kaioshin said. “There’s still one more thing you must see…”

“If you’re going to show me what I’m thinking…then don’t,” Scrooge said.

Once again the bright light engulfed them. Now they stood in a larger room. Scrooge’s past self was in his later twenties. He was doing push ups when the door opened, and Bulma walked in.

“I told you not to show me this…” Scrooge snapped at the spirit.

Bulma walked up to Vegeta and tapped her foot on the ground. “What do you want?” Vegeta asked as he continued his pushups.

“Vegeta, another Christmas has come, and soon it will pass. Every year you do the same thing. You train yourself and forget about me.”

“This is what I do,” Vegeta said. He stood up and looked at her.

“Are we ever going to get married? Or are you going to continue keep me from moving on?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Bulma turned around, her back facing him. “You just don’t love me the way you used to, Vegeta. I’m sorry, but I can’t live a life like this.” Vegeta didn’t speak. “I hope you become what you’ve been training for. Good-bye.” She glanced back and then walked away without saying another word. Young Vegeta stood there in disbelief that she just picked up and left.

“Spirit, show me no more…” Scrooge said turning away from the scene.

After a moment of silence, Scrooge turned around expecting to see the spirit Kaioshin standing before him. However, he noticed he was standing in his bedroom once again. As he came to the conclusion he was sleepwalking and it was a dream, the clock struck two. Scrooge looked up and waited, but nothing happened.

“Bah…” he said to himself and climbed into bed again. As he did this, a light came from the other room and he could hear laughing. Startled, he gingerly walked to the room and looked in.

A heavy, pink man wearing white puffy pants and a purple vest sat in the middle of the room, food surrounding him. “Hello!” He greeted with a large smile. “I’m Buu! The Ghost of Christmas Present!”

“Another ghost?” Scrooge questioned himself, almost believing that this wasn’t a dream at all.

“Would you like some food? There’s plenty for both of us!” The spirit said. He seemed to be a happy-go-lucky sort of person with no worries in the world.

“No…what are you doing here?” Scrooge asked.

“I’m the second ghost that was foretold to you. Did you not know that? Come on! Let’s go!” Buu said and got up. He made a cartwheel to Scrooge and jumped up. “Ready?”

“Where are we going?” Scrooge asked. His question was answered when he found himself on the streets of the city.

“It’s Christmas morning!” Buu said cheerfully.

“The people were out and about on this fine morning,” Cell explained as he watched Buu jumping up and down. He cleared his throat. “Anyway, Scrooge was still amazed from the last spirit, and now he was experiencing the work of another. And basically that’s all there is to tell for now.”

Scrooge was feeling a little enlightened. “Spirit, if you’re going to show me anything, show me someone I know…”

“Okies!” Buu exclaimed. They appeared in the house of Scrooge’s nephew Gohan and his wife Videl.

Gohan stood before a group of people, which included his wife, Oolong, Paur, the Ox King, and Dr. and Mrs. Briefs. “I propose we play a game,” Gohan said.

“Oh yes!” Videl agreed. “A guessing game. You go first, Gohan. You always come up with good ones.”

“Alright…” Gohan thinks for a moment.

“A food,” Oolong guessed.

“Nope,” Gohan said.

“Something alive?” Paur asked.

“Something unwanted?” Videl asked.

“Usually,” Gohan replied.

“A cockroach,” Mrs. Briefs guessed.

“Nope.”

“A disease,” Dr. Briefs said.

“Nope.”

“Something that lives in the city?” Paur asked.

“Sure does.”

“Sure it’s not a cockroach?” Oolong asked.

“Not at all.”

“I know!” Videl exclaimed. “It’s not a cockroach at all! It’s an unwanted creature that lives in the city…Vegeta Scrooge!”

“Of course!” Gohan laughed, the others laughing with him.

Scrooge watched in disgust. “You spirits love to see something that is against me, don’t you?”

“Nope!” Buu said. “Let’s go somewhere else!”

They found themselves in a poorer section of the city in front of a small hut. “Who lives here?” Scrooge asked looking around. “I don’t know anyone this low…”

As he said this, laughter could be heard coming from down the street. Both Scrooge and Buu looked ahead and saw a father and son walking home. The father carried his son on his shoulder, and the small boy was holding onto what seemed to be a walking stick.

“Cratchit?” Scrooge asked himself in surprise. He watched as Goku Cratchit opened the door to the house and went in. Scrooge and Buu looked through the tiny front window.

“Welcome home, Goku,” a black haired woman said.

“Hello, Chi Chi,” Goku greeted his wife. “That smells so good!”

“Is it ready yet, Mom?” The small boy asked.

“Not yet, Tim. Children,” Chi Chi said, “help set the table for dinner.” She waited for the three children to go off. “How was he at church?” She asked watching her youngest son.

“He was great,” Goku replied. “He seemed to really enjoy it tonight.”

Scrooge watched as Tiny Tim limped around on the crutch as his brother and sister ran around playing. “Wait for me!” The boy would yell to them. For the first time in his life, Scrooge could feel his heart being tugged at. “Tell me, Spirit,” he said. “What will happen to the kid?”

Buu yawned and looked through the window. “That’s the future. But I can see a vacant seat by the chimney corner, and a crutch without an owner. If these shadows remain, I think the child will die.”

Scrooge didn’t reply to what he had just been told. He watched as the older brother held a toy in the air so Tim was unable to reach it. Though he was being teased, Tim laughed with his siblings. The smile on his face was a symbol of the child’s happiness, though he was very ill. Losing his balance, Tim fell to the floor. The middle child, Marron, helped him to his feet.

“My time is going bye bye,” Buu said. “Time to go.”

Scrooge turned slowly, keeping the image of Tiny Tim in his mind. He now found himself standing in a graveyard. He looked around in wonder and then noticed that he was now alone. He looked around for the Ghost of Christmas Present, but he was nowhere in sight. “Spirit?” He turned around to see another figure standing before him. Scrooge squinted his eyes to see through the shadows.

The figure approached Scrooge, his arms crossed and a smile on his face. Coming into the light, Scrooge could see that this man was a tall man that resembled the devil himself with his darker pink skin and pointy ears.

“You’re the third ghost that is to come?” Scrooge asked sounding almost tired of the routine.

“I am Dabura, Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come. Come with me…” Dabura brought Scrooge to the city. It was a cold, gray, and rainy day. A small group of people stood on the sidewalk under umbrellas.

“I don’t know how or when,” said one. “All I know is he’s dead.”

“No big loss. The city will be a brighter place,” said another.

“Yeah…his stinginess won’t be here to block the sun!” Laughed a third.

Scrooge watched as the people walked off laughing. “What were they talking about?” Dabura said nothing; instead he pointed to a window in a shop across the street. Scrooge walked over and peered in. A man was standing in front of two other people.

“So what have you brought me today?” He asked. (Note: This guy is Android 17).

“That old guy finally kicked the bucket,” said the woman (And this is Android 18). “I brought ya his blankets.”

17 took them from her and felt their softness. “My gosh…they’re still warm!”

“Should be,” 18 replied, “It’s the only warmth he ever had.”

“I brought these curtains,” said the other. “Made of fine silk.”

“Yes,” 17 said. “You did good today. I wish someone like him would die everyday…I’d be rich!”

Scrooge backed away with a feeling of disbelief. “I have a feeling I know what this is all leading to. But if this is the future, bring me to a place better than this.” Darkness surrounded them for a brief moment. When it faded away, Scrooge found himself standing in front of the Cratchit house. He looked in the window and saw Mrs. Cratchit sitting at the table, her arms resting on the table and holding her head up. The oldest boy came from a different room with firewood in his arms.

“I brought this for tonight,” he said setting them down in the corner. When he backed away, Scrooge noticed a chair sitting in the corner next to the wood. On it was a hat and a crutch without an owner.

Before Scrooge could say anything, Goku Cratchit came up behind and went into the house. “Hello, everyone,” he said quietly. He walked over to his wife and sat down beside her. “The Christmas flowers are beginning to bloom now. Soon the area will be a little more colorful…the way Tim would have wanted.”

“If only we had enough money…maybe then we could’ve paid a doctor…and Tim…” Chi Chi said between sobs.

“I know dear…” Goku said, trying to comfort her. “Trunks…Marron…get washed up for dinner.”

“Alright,” they said and left the room without argument.

Scrooge looked down at the ground, lost in his thoughts. When he looked up, he saw that he was once again in the graveyard. “Tell me, Spirit,” he said. “Who was that man that had died? The one everyone was so happy was gone…”

Dabura smiled evilly at Scrooge. “I thought you said you figured it out…” He pointed his finger to a tombstone and a small blast of fire shot out. The fire burned around the bottom of the stone, melting the ice and snow that was frozen on it. Soon the fire died down, and between the smoke was the name of the man. Vegeta Scrooge.

Scrooge walked up to the stone in horror. “These are only the shadows of things that could be…not things that will be?” Dabura didn’t answer. “Answer me Spirit! Could things change?” For the first time he could remember, tears flooded Scrooge’s eyes, temporarily blinding him.

Scrooge gave in and wiped them away. He looked around and saw that he was in his own bedroom. The morning sun lit the room; birds could be heard singing. “I’m…still alive,” Scrooge said to himself. “All of that happened in one night!” Scrooge went over to the window and opened it. He saw the small caroler from the other day walking along the street. “You there!” He yelled down.

“Me?” Chauzou asked looking up, seeing Scrooge in the window.

“What day is it?”

“Christmas, sir!” He replied.

“It’s true! I haven’t missed anything!” Scrooge thought a moment and reached for his wallet sitting on the bureau. “Know that turkey in the general store window?”

“Of course! It’s as big as I am,” the caroler said.

“Buy it and bring it back to me. Here,” Scrooge threw down a handful of bills. Chauzou gathered it up and ran off.

“After all of the ghostly excitement during the night, Scrooge got it in his head that he better wise up,” Cell said. “Yes, I’m still here. What? Thought that if I didn’t say anything for a while that I had disappeared too? Sorry.” He smiled. “Now to end this poor excuse for a story…Scrooge was soon dressed and outside, waiting for the weak…I mean small caroler to return with the food.”

Chauzou came jogging down the street with the turkey held high above his head. “Here you go, Mr. Scrooge,” he said.

“Carry it and follow me,” Scrooge told him.

Cell, following Scrooge and the caroler, eyed the turkey with greed. “That looks good…Oh yeah…” He snaps out of his trance. “Where are we going, you ask. We’re going to the other side of town and delivering this bird to Goku’s house. And then his wife can cook it and invite everyone inside and we eat it and live happily ever after…”

Scrooge and Chauzou (and Cell) stopped in front of the Cratchit house. Scrooge pushed Chauzou to the side to hide him, and then knocked on the door. “Cratchit! Open this door at once!”

The door opened and Goku looked out with a surprised look on his face. “Mr. Scrooge! What brings you here?”

“Where were you this morning!? I told you to be in work no later than eight-thirty!” Scrooge scolded.

“But-but Mr. Scrooge…you said I could have the day off…”

“Don’t talk back to me! For what I pay you, you should have been in!”

Chi Chi, who was listening to the whole conversation, pushed Goku to the side and faced Scrooge. “Now you look here, buster,” she said with anger. “You don’t pay my husband half of the amount he deserves….”

“You think I’m stupid!?” Scrooge snapped back. “I’m paying him more than half!”

“You are…” Chi Chi paused. “What?”

“I just told you. He’s getting a raise.”

“I am?” Goku said raising an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Didn’t I just say that? Now you can pay a doctor for that kid of yours and stuff.” Scrooge glanced to the side and saw Chauzou’s foot coming from around the corner. “Oh yeah…and this is for you and your family.” Chauzou came up with the turkey.

“Oh my goodness!” Chi Chi said.

“A turkey!” Tiny Tim yelled from inside.

Scrooge and Chauzou were invited inside for a Christmas dinner. Cell put one foot inside and then turned. “Oh yeah. The kid…err…Tiny Tim didn’t die after all. Now everyone will live happily ever after.”