Author's notes: This is my first attempt at a yaoi fanfic even though I've been reading some of them for a while now. I'd love comments but please no flames! I'm a newbie! Pity me! Jk sorta. Also, this is a SeijixTouma fic. I write them as Sage and Rowen but I'm more formal when it comes to introductions with the fanfic. Please don't find it too short or unbearably brief. I wrote this in one night before going to bed. Maybe I'll write the sequel to it some day. That's if anyone likes it. Thank you and enjoy!

~I can't do it. Its getting to hard to go through this day after day!~ Rowen thought and sighed into the palm of his hand as he watched his friends and fellow warriors continue to wrestle around in the mud created from the water that was supposed to be for White Blaze's bath. The tiger got out dry but as for everyone else, including himself, it was a different story. ~Its like I have to pretend that I'm not tearing myself apart on the inside. I wish I could tell some one . . . anyone! But most of all him!~

Kento tried to yank Cye back down into the mud puddle but the moisture made the pants slippery and he just fell back into it instead, still laughing. Cye who was almost completely covering from head to toe in brown smooth mud, stood a few feet away and laughed, his aqua eyes dancing with amusement at his best friend. Kento was completely covered, no doubt, except that his large, deep blue eyes shown strong amongst the slippery brown stuff that covered the rest of his head.

Ryo, who wasn't covered as bad as Cye and Kento, gave up chasing the teasing tiger and dropped down to the dry grass with a loud and squishy plop. Even Sage had to laugh at this scene before him. He stood off to the side laughing, after giving up in vain to get rid of the incriminating evidence of his involvement. He was probably the cleanest by only a few inches more of clean fabric.

Rowen looked over at him, hearing his rare laughter was a gift that he never ever took for granted. He studied him and every spot of mud on his clothes. The slick wetness in his honey-blonde hair and the water making his oxford shirt hug him in a few areas over his chest and back. He could see the movement of his strong muscles contract under his shirt as he shook with laughter. When Sage laughed, it wasn't artificial or hidden in his throat. It was a rich and natural sound from his stomach. Rowen had to take a deep breath and blink to calm himself down enough to look away.

Rowen knows every inch and movement of his best friend's and completed his studies without anyone noticing, not even Sage or Cye whom were the most observant out of them. After catching himself gazing soulfully at Sage while he was sleeping late one night, it occurred to him that he liked Sage. Not as a companion, comrade, best friend, brother-in-arms, or fellow warrior but as something more and it scared him. After a while Rowen became accustomed to it but that only made it harder to cope with. How long was he going to last? He slept in the same room with him, shared secrets with him and received some in return, and he was one of Sage's only comforts, and pride was something they left at their bedroom door. They were free to just be themselves but this was different. Rowen couldn't tell him this. He'd be short one best friend and probably four more, and maybe even he'd be sent back to the lonely, dusty apartment he came from. No, he couldn't risk all that just to fill in his emptiness.

But how long can he put up this charade? Not for too much longer before accidentally spilling the beans or forgetting to put up a mental wall when thinking about Sage. He was especially worried about it nowadays because his little crush did not lessen and instead grew. He was in love with him.

~Maybe I should just go and that way I could avoid the chance of them finding out. It might be better that way.~ He sighed in shame that it might have to come down to that. But he understood that he just might have to.

"Hey Ro, what's wrong?" came that voice to his right, sounding contented and amused. He snapped out of his thoughts and turned to see Sage, now only a few inches from where he sat on the lawn, with a genuine smile on his beautifully angelic face.

"Nothing Sage," Rowen didn't have to force the smile that came on his face. "I just kinda zoned out. Sorry."

"No problem, no reason to be sorry," Sage chuckled and reached his hands behind him, "But now you'll have to pay the price." He said that with more humor in his tone of voice than expected from Rowen and before his eyes could get as large as possible, Sage pulled out a bucket and poured its contents over Rowen's head. Rowen reached up to feel the mud in his hair that now slipped down all over him. Some of it went down the inside of his shirt and slunk between his legs to another sensitive spot. When both trails hit, he jumped up with a gasp and something resembling a squeak of protest. Rowen squirmed around at the cold, wet earth invading him, which made Sage literally double over laughing. Even while jumping around and shaking his shirt to get the cold squishy stuff out, Rowen's heart fluttered. After getting most of it out and waiting for the shock to overcome him, he realized that he had been the center of attention for a while. Cye, Kento, Ryo, and even the newly arrived Mia had joined in Sage's laughter. He couldn't stop the blush that overcame his face as he reached his arm to scratch the back of his head through the goo.

Later, after taking turns with getting sprayed down with the hose in nothing but they're boxers, they all retreated to the house for a quieter evening. Rowen was glad that everyone decided to settle down a bit because the picture of Sage in his head soak and wet in his silk black boxers was fresh in his mind. Yes they all had bathed together in the lake and other things like that but this was Sage! Rowen's feelings toward him never started out as physical. He just felt wanted, needed, and cared for by him and soon became drawn to Sage. When he reminded himself that he was in love with Sage, he meant completely; mind, body, and soul.

~What would Sage think?~ He wondered and almost laughed out loud at the thought of Sage's wide-eyed expression he might get, but kept himself in check when he thought about the vibrations of disgust that would probably emit from Sage after the realization.

He lay down on his stomach across his bed, trying to with all his might to read and comprehend the words fluttering across the page. He just couldn't with his love on his mind. He couldn't understand and didn't care why he was attracted to another guy instead of a girl like every man was expected to. He only figured that he didn't care what gender, if he loved somebody then that was that. And sometimes he thought that maybe it could be possible that Sage would accept him as more than a friend when Sage showed him affection that he never showed any of the others. He even received loving hugs from him a few times. But Sage always pulled away shortly after. Maybe Sage doesn't want to send any false signals to him . . .

The silence in the room was interrupted by the sound of the door opening and closing, admitting Sage into the room to sit next to Rowen. The bed sunk a little with the weight and Rowen tried not to get lost in the sudden giddy feeling in his stomach. He looked up at Sage after concealing his feelings that could be easily found in his eyes.

"Can I talk to you for a minute or so?" Sage asked seriously but he apparently couldn't get rid of all of his happiness from earlier from the sparkle in his eyes.

"Sure, shoot." Rowen smiled and closed the book, thankful to stop feigning interest in it.

"Earlier, before I covered you in mud," Sage couldn't help but let out a small chuckled before leaving amusement behind to take up concern, "You blocked all of your thoughts and access to anyone outside. Is something wrong?"

"No, of course not, Sage. W-why would there have to be something wrong? I-I just zoned out is all," ~Geez, didn't know I could stutter and babble at the same time. Good going Ro, that was so believable. You could lie to the Pope. ~

Sage did definitely not believe it at all. ~Could he know? Could he possibly comprehend the feelings I have for him and have had for who knows how long? God I hope not.~ Just then he realized that for that small piece of thought, he didn't block access to his mind and blushed so slightly that he hoped in vain that Sage didn't notice.

He stood up and walked to the window, without looking back at Sage in fear of letting him see any evidence of embarrassment. Of course, this was in vain because Sage did see and Sage even followed him to the window as Rowen climbed out and onto the roof. They often came out at night to sit there and watch the sunset or gaze at the stars, sometimes together and sometimes apart.

Instead of carrying on that useless conversation, Sage only sat next to him in silence as the sun lowered on the horizon. After a long drawn out minute of silence, Sage's soft voice broke the quiet atmosphere.

"It's a more spectacular sight here at Mia's place. Too many buildings in the way in the city."

Rowen could only nod and continue to stare out at the colorful ribbons shooting through the sky and disappearing as the sun sank lower. It was starting to get harder to keep him in check and it almost became painful. The person he loved most in the world and beyond was sitting right next to him and was completely unaware of it.

"It is," he finally agreed verbally, "Definitely more beautiful out here than in the dull city."

Rowen could almost feel Sage's eyes on him and was starting to boil from the pain that he could never capture the other's heart as his was. It wasn't fair. Then again, as the saying goes, who ever said that life was fair? He didn't like this commonly used phrase.

"It most definitely is, Rowen," Sage said, never taking his eyes from Rowen's turned away and blushing face.

~I hope he can't tell that I'm now red in the face. Oh crap crap crap!~ Rowen gulped as he felt Sage's hand tracing his jaw line gently. When a punch, slap, or harsh words never came, he bravely looked at Sage, not aware until then how close they were sitting.

Sage didn't look harsh at all, in fact he looked, dare he think it, loving. His eyes were not showing any hint of coldness and he left them unclouded and free of the walls he built around his emotions. Rowen couldn't hold in the quivering sigh in his chest from the look of love and longing and lonely set in the flawless lavender. Was it true? Did he . . . long to be with Rowen?

"S-sage?" Rowen whispered barely audible to some one even as close to him as Sage was at the very moment.

"Very beautiful," Sage whispered back, tracing Rowen's face with careful and gentle fingers. That's what let the flood loose. Rowen could no longer hold on to the mask he held up for everyone to see. The emotions were let loose in his creamy cornflower eyes. Sage also noticed and anticipated this.

As their heads leaned closer together, Rowen could manage one more repeat of Sage's name before going temporarily mute. Sage's lips brushed across his once, twice, and finally made full contact. Everything exploded all at once. Sage's other hand wrapped itself around Rowen's waist and pulled him close. Rowen's arms circled Sage's neck, not wanting to give him up for anything. After long minutes of exploration and perfecting the tilt of their heads and positions of their tongues, they both released one another and locked eyes.

Sage, breathless, leaned his forehead against Rowen's and smiled the most disarmingly sweet and truthful smiles Rowen's ever witnessed. Rowen was left dazed, confused, but most importantly whole. He searched Sage's eyes for the answers to the many questions swimming around in his head. He only found one. Sage really meant it.

"Sage?" he whispered again, not knowing what else could be said. Then he saw it in Sage's deep eyes, fear and doubt. It made him want to hug him tight and wash it all away.

"Rowen, I love you with all my heart," Sage gulped, bearing it all to Rowen, "What do you feel for me?"

He was so strong, Rowen's Sage-chan. It made him proud to respond, "I love you too Sage-chan, with all of my heart."

Sage was overwhelmed with relief and love all at once and it showed through the smile he gave Rowen, his Rowen.

They spent that night out on the roof in each other's arms, warm and content. Words could be spoken later but this was the time to share their first sunset as a couple. They were speaking the language of love. After all, their special love was bound to happen, sooner or later.