Pen Pen's Evangelion
A Pen Pen for your Thoughts
This section will just be for, basically random thoughts and feelings. Since my thought process is mostly random you can probably expect this to be updated frequently. Back to Previous Pennys. Back to Pen Penny.
Buttered Swedish Shoes
Imagine, a world of shoes… filled with butter. I know it is hard to fathom such a horrifying place. However, such a thing has arisen, and on a remote mountain top in Sweden. It is a ghastly sight to behold or even imagine. There were shoes… pairs of them and they were… filled to the brim with butter. It is such a foul disrespectful degradation to befit such great, fantastic, and fashionable footwear. What sort of madman would do this to shoes that were harming nobody and were causing no trouble in their quiet little neighborhoods? It is an unspeakable crime, well obviously not quite unspeakable, but still only mentionable to those able to handle news of such carnage. Probably should have had a warning then though, so never mind. And yet, it is not the first time such an event has taken place. What we have here (here as in over in Sweden), is a copycat offender. A Chinese photographer pioneered the evil deed in the Tibetan landscape. It was perpetrated by the infamous "photographic artist" Yin Xiuzhen. Yes, the name that strikes fear into the heart of all shoes, and for good reason.
It was 1996 in Tibet. It was a peaceful time, but then, like a catastrophe they swept down upon the landscape, or were more like placed. Shoes, filled with butter, were scattered about and photographed. Under the guise of artistry such an offense was committed and left alone without repercussions for the one who orchestrated the abomination. Now, an unnamed assailant has repeated this feat against all ethics. This time the creator didn't even try to blame the atrocity on artistry and just left the scene of the crime for some unsuspecting tourists to stumble upon. Seventy pairs. That's how many shoes were defiled this time. I can find no record of the amount from the notorious 1996 butter shoe butchering.
Some people may try to defend the buttery shoes with buttered up truths. They may say, in Tibet they were trying to symbolize how the region is being held by captive China and the shoes filled with butter represent how the journey of Tibet to freedom is a long and mushy one. Or they say it symbolizes the struggle for butter to fit in with people as equal citizens. Or they say the shoes represent the sweatshops where children work for pennies an hour and the butter displays all they can buy with a day's wages. Or they say the shoes represent man's creations and the butter represents man's spinelessness in going forth boldly with their creations. Or they say the shoes are death and the light buttery taste represents the buttery and squishy side of death. Or they say it's a new orthopedic and podiatric assistant.
Of course, if any of those were remotely true; and I do mean remotely, some of those are pushing it really, really far, then why would it need to be repeated? It wouldn't. The answer is clear, as clear as the butter in the shoes wouldn't taste right anymore. There would be no reason to do such a thing to shoes after it had already been done to their Chinese cousins. Yet, the police do not seem to be pursuing the one who did this very ardently. The shoes… are beyond repair. The butter seeps deep into shoes, with no chances of leaving. This sort of thing cannot be allowed to repeat in other countries. This fiend must be found and made an example to all whom would destroy shoes mercilessly and buttery. It is the only hope if our very civilization is to continue. Our very futures could rest in the Swedish police force, and teeter on apprehension of this buttery criminal. -10/12/03
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