Pen Pen's Evangelion
A Pen Pen for your Thoughts
This section will just be for, basically random thoughts and feelings. Since my thought process is mostly random you can probably expect this to be updated frequently. Back to Previous Pennys. Back to Pen Penny.
French Connections
International forces recently found a location where fugitive al Qaeda chief Osama bin Laden is thought to have been hiding, according to French Defense Minister (a.k.a. Office of Capitulation) Michele Alliot-Marie (who is also coincidentally head of the distinctly French White Flags Inc.). The Defense Minister said in an interview that French troops operating (in one of the country’s rare non-surrendering operations, of course they didn‘t encounter any enemies, but that‘s no guarantee for their “army“) near Afghanistan's border with Pakistan had helped trace bin Laden but did not say where, how wide an area she was referring to or whether he was still there. Boy, that’s some detailed intel they’ve collected there.
A spokesman said the minister was referring to the discovery of a location where bin Laden was believed to have been "at a certain time," well that’s certainly not at all vague. If they say “his mother’s womb” or “the Middle East” I swear I’m coming after them. The Defense Minister also said, “Thanks to certain information, they were recently able to make an effective contribution to locating him." No they didn‘t, he’s not there now so it doesn’t “contribute” to locating him at all. If I go to a murder scene and somehow deduce with my investigating skills that the murderer was there at some point, I’m not helping find him now am I?
And that’s not all, when asked if the man who was there was definitely bin Laden she said "Everything leads us to think so." Well, I think the French are stupid, does that make it true? Well, they are stupid, but NOT because I think it, it’s just their nature. Although some of them are trying to contribute. A French artist was convicted of trying to run over a pedestrian he mistook for Osama bin Laden and was ordered to pay the man $615. He chased the man through a pedestrian zone and a red light and only stopped when his car ran into a staircase. The man was also given a suspended sentence for three months and was ordered to seek counseling after his “hallucination.” Or was it?
The French have already said they knew where he was at a certain time. Maybe it really was bin Laden and France surrendered to him or something. Now, let’s take this logically and step by step, we can’t jump to any outrageous conclusions. Now, Bastille Day was on July 14th, 1789 and if we add the numbers forming the year we get 25 and by subtracting the 21 formed by adding the month and day together we get four, which is the amount of stomachs a cow has. Now, cows make milk, and the Milk River was part of France’s domain until the Louisiana Purchase. And the leader of France at the time? Napoleon. Thirteen letters in Napoleon and Osama bin Laden. It’s right there in black and white people! - 3/22/04
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