Pen Pen's Evangelion
A Pen Pen for your Thoughts
This section will just be for, basically random thoughts and feelings. Since my thought process is mostly random you can probably expect this to be updated frequently. Back to Previous Pennys. Back to Pen Penny.
Kindness of Heart
I recently heard on a radio show that the company's employees all had a "kindness of heart." I wonder, how can they guarantee this? Is there some form of pre-detection? Will they be fired if they are found lacking this? It is standard that employees get a two weeks notice, but will these people get one at all? Can they just go and get some kindness? Let's say they can't. So, why give them a notice if they can't change it? I know if I got a notice saying that I was being fired for lacking a kindness of heart, I would get angry. If it does this, and makes them less kind, why fire them if they had kindness to lose? Is their kindness not good enough for you? Who are you to judge kindness? You're going to fire someone who has kindness, which would make them less kind, because they lack kindness. Is there jealousy involved? Can I still work if I have a niceness or gentleness of heart? If there is someone is isn't naturally kind but fakes it in order to make a living and work, a kindness of necessity, would they be fired? These are all types of kindness. Is there really a difference? When did you become dictator of all things kindness? It seems you aren't a very merciful or kind dictator for the dictator of kindness.
Fine, you have a kindness of heart policy, but what about customers? Must all of your customers have a kindness of heart? If these customers without a kindness of heart are not turned away then would these, I don't want to say 'evil,'(but I will) customers cause employees to lose their kindness of hearts'. Would you fire them? I think this would make jobs at the company unstable and lead to a shortage of employees. Maybe you should have regulated the customers, but it's too late for that. Hey, it's not my fault, don't blame me I even suggested it. Do your products have kindness of heart? What is your return policy for lacking kindness of heart if I find my product doesn't have kindness of heart? Would I get cash, store credit, or kindness of heart? If I get a product replaced could it have kindness of heart? How could it if it's counterpart that I originally bought lack it? Was there a malfunction in the machine that inserts kindness of heart? Can I buy kindness of heart from you? How long is the warranty on kindness of heart, I'd hate to be stuck with a broken kindness of heart or lose my job because I can't get more. Can I get kindness of heart insurance? Would it be expensive? Will my insurance agent have kindness of heart? Do I get cheaper rates if he doesn't or would the absence of kindness of heart have him raise fees out of spite? I think that guy should buy some kindness of heart. Can I get kindness of hearts for pets? Would this affect them greatly? For instance, if they were evil pets would kindness of heart be like a lethal poison? Would I get my money back?
Is there an international organization for the support of people lacking kindness of heart? Is it called OSOLKH? Do I really have to repeat myself and say what that stands for? Too bad. Can I become a member of OSOLKH? If I were to suddenly receive kindness of heart, perhaps as a gift from others who are frightened, would I be kicked out? Where does the organization get their funds? Obviously, it is not from any members because if you were to give to an organization that stands for a good cause it would be from the kindness of your heart. Knowing this, if a member donates to the cause will they be kicked out? Does the organization occasionally dissolve because the people realize the kindness of others in order to keep handicapped people such as themselves in an organization? Can I find it the next time and become leader? Is there some sort of bill protecting those who lack a kindness of heart from the devious kind people? How easy would it be to start one? Would I get a cookie for doing this? If I got a cookie from one of my organizational minions… er, members then would I have to kick them out? What if I made a special group exempt from this as long as they give me cookies? Would this create some sort of upper class among those who lack kindness of heart, which would later lead to an aristocracy with me as leader? Can I randomly select peasants and make them give me cookies? What if the cookies tasted bad? Would I have to beat them (actually choose would be a better word)? Could I gleefully and evilly cackle like a megalomaniac as this took place? What is the dental plan for a semi-evil, megalomaniacal, monarch-ish type leader?
Could I make my own country and call it 'Land of Those Who Lack Kindness of Heart'? Is that too long? What if I call it 'Land'? Could I make cookies national currency? How would the value be determined? What of cookie crumbs? The age-old question of which type of cookie is best would have to be decided. Could I take the show Iron Chef and only have them make cookies with somewhat strange ingredients (i.e. human flesh)? Would other countries challenge my authority? Could cookies decide diplomatic policies? Could I dominate the cookie industry? What if I captured the Keebler Elves and forced them to do my bidding and make cookies for me? Would they? Can I have one be my personal chef? How tall are they really? I think a better name for my country would be 'Cookie Land' but that sounds too much like a theme park or bakery. How about 'Land of Most Frightening and Threatening People Who Like Cookies'? I'd have to get a fairly large country to fit that on maps though, because I don't want it abbreviated to LMFTPWLC. After all that would be absurd. Can I have cookie colonies? Would they eventually revolt and declare themselves independent of the 'mother cookie'? Would we go to war? And no, the soldiers wouldn't fight with cookies. They would have cookie rations though (did I lose my train of thought). If someone of kindness of heart were to infiltrate would my mighty cookie empire collapse? Where was I? Oh yea, kindness of heart… heart… heart-shaped cookies… they are tasty… and delicious… don't forget scrumptious… cookies… cookies… cookies. -9/26/02
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