Pen Pen's Evangelion
A Pen Pen for your Thoughts
This section will just be for, basically random thoughts and feelings. Since my thought process is mostly random you can probably expect this to be updated frequently. Back to Previous Pennys. Back to Pen Penny.
What's Love Got To Do With It
Recently, I noticed a distinct trend appearing on, mostly women's, t-shirts. They have written on them, "I (picture of heart, probably meaning love) NY." Now, this began to bother me as a saw many with this same shirt on. Just who is this "NY" (pronounced n-ye, I believe) anyway? Do these people know that he (a conclusion obtained by the fact it is on women's t-shirts) is cheating on every one of them? Where does he get the time to do this? As a chivalrous person who looks out for the welfare of others, including the opposite sex, I decided to investigate. I picked up a phone book and searched the directory for "Ny." To my dismay they are either unlisted, new to the area, or in an entirely different area altogether. It sounds foreign, so maybe he just immigrated to the area. I then thought that since both letters were capitalized, maybe it was his initials. Unfortunately there was no one of the last name "Y" either. Out of options, and discouraged, I approached one of the victims. I said that many people have been wearing the same identical shirt praising love for this "NY." She laughed and said that she knew that. What has he done to these people? I asked where I could find him, she only laughed in my face. This led me to believe that this "NY" could not be stopped. After conferring with other victims, with similar responses, one asked, "You do know it stands for New York, right?" At this point the pieces fell together. I now had a name to this fiend! Figuring such a diabolical person would not list his number in a phone book, I decided to check the internet (if you are now thinking, couldn't you have checked it in the first place, well, don't). I was aghast at what I found. Searching for New York brings up thousands of results. It seems not to be a man but some sort of spell or potion that "holds over a million people." How far has the epidemic spread? How contagious is it? Why is it not being addressed by the Center for Disease Control? I asked a representative if they knew what New York was, and what they plan to do with it. They responded that they knew full well, and plan to do nothing, "New York is here to stay." I was shocked at their carelessness. Further research revealed that New York had been in the U.S. for hundreds of years. Small at first, but it quickly grew and has maintained an infected rate for generations with a steady rise. Plus, it strangely doesn't seem to be present in other nations of the world. I then discussed this serious issue with a friend of mine. He then promptly slammed my head against a wall and called me names like "idiot" and said things like "New York is a city and a state." Obviously, he was already infected. After bandaging my bleeding head I thought about what he had said. Then, I quickly dismissed the thought that I was an idiot. What else did he tell me? I then saw a television broadcast that would explore "New York." Finally, the truth would be set free! Alas, it seems the creators were infected as well and said it was an important "city" and "state" on the eastern coast. How will it be stopped, it cannot be said. It has stayed here for years and shows no sign of stopping. There seems to be no cure for being a "New Yorker," nor one in development. The next time one of these "New Yorkers" is rude or mean to you. Take pity on them, for it is probably a reaction to being a "New Yorker." -4/5/02
Home