Pen Pen's Evangelion
A Pen Pen for your Thoughts
This section will just be for, basically random thoughts and feelings. Since my thought process is mostly random you can probably expect this to be updated frequently. Back to Previous Pennys. Back to Pen Penny.
Mmm… People
People. Some people eat people. These people are known as cannibals. If a cannibal eats a cannibal, are they a cannibalistic cannibal? Or are they just ordinary cannibals? How many times must you eat human flesh to become a cannibal? What if it's just an accident? I think that it would be strange to be labeled a cannibal if it was only an accident. After all if I'm tricked into eating human flesh (which hasn't happened to my knowledge) when I thought I was only eating monkey brains, I would be quite upset. That might not bode well with others. If I were to eat a vegetarian, would that count as fruit and vegetable groups for the nutrition pyramid? What about alcoholics, does it being pre-marinated add to the flavor?
If I were to become so evil as to be called inhuman and/or inhumane, does this mean I am no longer a cannibal? If they realize that I am inhuman and/or inhumane, can they undo the label of cannibal? Were the past occurrences that were deemed "cannibalistic" declared void? The exact time inhumanity took place must therefore be determined. Who declares this? Can I eat them? Is there some sort of Cannibal Council that makes these decisions? Can I be on it? I believe my experience in these "matters" would add greatly to its prestige/infamy and the "hands-on" experience that is so craved nowadays.
We all know of cannibalism, but what is it really. If I were to just chew and not swallow, is that cannibalism? What about if I inhale (or don't inhale) the smell of it burning if it is cooked? Must it be cooked? The dictionary says a cannibal is a person who eats human flesh. What if I were to make it into some sort of mush, stay with me now, and blend it into a liquid and use a sort of I.V. to get the nutrition? Hey, I'm not really "eating" anything. On that note, what if I just drink blood, or the fore-mentioned mush? There needs to be an explicit booklet outlining these things. Of course then this would have to fall on the duties on the council over the topic of cannibalism formed to make take care of these issues. In order to make them international, there would have to be a joint-national meeting, which will likely lead to many conflicts on cultural beliefs of cannibalism and may start the Cannibalistic Wars as they will be dubbed solely by myself and later the media, in which I will get a quarter whenever someone says it. I don't really think there will be lots of cannibalism going on during the Cannibalistic Wars though, it isn't militarily feasible, unless you feed it to your troops, then your supply line could never be cut off because its made up of your casualties (I'm a brilliant tactician).
I am Lord Cheesewedge; you must bow down before me. Sorry, that just slipped out. Many people frown upon cannibalism, few practice it. Today, the cannibalistic societies dwindle and die (all hail Lord Cheesewedge). There are but few remaining, and none flourish (as it has been said by Lord Cheesewedge). When the last cannibal dies, who will mourn their passing (Lord Cheesewedge might)? Will there be a statue made? Of course someone else could just become a cannibal and then there would be at least one, in which case any memorials aren't needed (Lord Cheesewedge knows this, for he is wise). Then they would have to tear down any statues or just kill the cannibal (are you bowing before Lord Cheesewedge). All in all, memorials aren't a good idea, and would only serve to honor/remind/horrify/appall, more remind, people about it (please bow). The cannibals of today are not like those of yesteryear (if you're reading this you must not be bowing). Many become them under excruciating circumstances and then don't do it again, and for some reason others don't like it (Lord Cheesewedge asked nicely). Many have had to adapt and societies in which cannibalism was common have fallen away (as you should fall on your knees in front of Lord Cheesewedge). Of course these societies also had virgin sacrifices, monsters roaming about, and self-mutilation, most of which have perished with these groups. Although some of these seem to be making a comeback (Lord Cheesewedge like). Sadly, the Golden Years of cannibalism are over (sadness overcomes Lord Cheesewedge), cannibals must now adapt into a new age of cannibalism, increased crime investigator skills mean it must become more stealthy and technological, which means neat gadgets to mess with. -11/30/02
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