Author's note: Um, before anyone reads this fanfic I should note that it is YAOI, meaning male x male relations. Homosexuality. If this offends you, then don't read it.

     Secondly I should add some additional warnings. This fic is a little darker than the ones I've written, but it's spicier too. It delves into the human mind and focuses strongly on inner emotions and the face we choose to hide from the world, and the face we choose to present. It also focuses on how love can conquer even the worst of emotions. The reason for this warning is because The Rage Instilled has a lot sexual innuendos. It also focuses on hallucinogens, murder and schizophrenia. THOUGH these are in the fic, they are not over powerful; I want it to have angst, but be mild still and not a complete "darkfic". I hope this is accomplished. Heero and Duo I've kept within the frame of character I like, and they have a strange relation. For once again, Duo it JUST beginning to discover his feelings for Heero. :) But the situations around them are interesting. Can't say I didn't warn ya. Without further ado, here's the Fanfic!

The General Warnings: 1x2, yaoi, language, angst

     "You punk ass kid!" Screamed the boy loudly; he grasped the other, younger boy by the collar. His left hand shaping a fist. Tears quivered down the older boys face. With a forceful shove he pushed the younger boy away, leaving him to skirmish up against the cold, slick, damp walls of the alley. The older boy began to crimple, his shoulders trembling as he sat down on the smutty street. Water from the mud puddles stained his jeans, his boots dragged heavily, and crunching soft against the gravel. His breaths were a soft whimper that escaped his lips almost barely. His fingers clasped together. His green hair fell into his eyes as his chin touched his knees. "S-sorry, Duo. I didn't mean- to yell at you like that-" the boy apologized.

     Duo pressed his fingers firmly to the wall, his fingers brushing over a faded, torn poster of a famous, singer. Duo quirked a smile faintly, his hands reaching to gently touch the older boys shoulder. "Hey, it's okay Johnny. I'm sorry- I shouldn't have-" He bit his lip, pulling his hand back to shake his head, "Aw hell, I shouldn't have brought up a touchy subject like that!" The boy slid his trembling fingers into his denim jacket, pulling out a cigarette, which he promptly lit. He inhales the sweet nicotine, blowing out the smoke into Duo's face with a hurt expression.

     Duo's fingers leeched out, snatching the cigarette only to toss it into the wet puddle by their feet. The braided-haired boy then rubbed his hands against Johnny's face, forcing the older boy to look at him. "Johnny, comeon, pull yourself together!" Tears continued to roll down Johnny's face, "Fuck! Man- first you come in talking shit up about my brother, now you steal my last smoke, what the hell do you want?" Duo released Johnny; his violet-blue eyes shifting over the area, the faint stench of garbage lingered beneath Duo's nose. "Johnny, your brother is being used. I gotta find him and stop him before he get's in way over his head. You have to tell me where he is!" Duo said firmly.

     Johnny leaned his head back against the wall, a lazy, silly smile turning his lips. His eyes were red, his tears were already drying to salt his face. His grungy, green hair lay limp against his skull. "Last I saw him he was getting on a bus twenty minutes ago with some other boy-" Johnny told Duo. "Some other boy?" "Yeah- Terrace I heard call him 'Flix'." Duo's eyes widened.

     Duo raced down the streets, dodging through the people that walked along the sidewalk. He breathed heavily, his arms pushing out forward. Twenty minutes. He still had time. He could catch up with them if he was fast enough. For once, Duo wasn't on an assigned mission. He was on a personal mission. Once when he visited L2 he became good friends with Terrace, Johnny's brother. In a way, he felt like he had Solo again. Someone with Solo's face, Solo's smile. But Terrace was a year younger than Duo. Terrace always told Duo how he'd make enough money to rise above and leave the dumps of L2. Duo didn't think Terrace would rise so quickly. He'd submerged into a world of drugs, provided by Flix. Flix was a dealer from Japan, he had made a new drug that was becoming popular. It was a drug that let you see the worst of places, looking beautiful, and all people looking beautiful, and a sense of false happiness. The downside was the drug torn away at the brain cells at a fast rate. Killing the user by the fiftieth dosage depending on body size.

     Duo grasped hold of his car door, launching himself into the seat.

     FUCK! Don't die! Terrace! Hold on!

+++

The Rage Instilled
By -j

Estvans interius
ira vehementi
in amaritudine
loquar mee menti:

     Heero slouched, his cool gaze observing the small group of people below him. The wind blew against his hair, tossing the dark, brown strands along the side of his face. Motionless. Timeless. He stood. With such patience and stillness, it seemed that he almost had no life in him at all. Even his breath was faint. The small group below was filled with uniformed soldiers of OZ, the alarm went off at this point and the men all began to race to find the problem. Heero scoffed, it was a silent gloat. He'd completed his mission.

     "Mission Accomplished," Heero whispered lowly, he leapt from his spot, and in an instant he was cloaked in the shadows.

     This was always the part Heero dreaded. The times where there was no mission, there was silence, and preparation for the next mission. But what was Heero to do? Drink? Celebrate? That wasn't his style. He was currently living alone. That was how he liked things. He didn't need to have a roommate. It left his apartment free for him to fully use it to it's limits. He tossed his jacket on the chair; his arms were covered with scrapes and gashes. His battle scars. His jacket was stained with blood. He was careless when it came to his physical needs. He'd push himself to the limit and then, go past that set limit. Everything was the way Heero wanted it.

     Heero dropped down into the chair, his fingers gripping the armrests as the pain settled into his aching body.

     Four weeks...

     Maybe, it wasn't the way Heero wanted it. There was an empty bed now. An empty room, a lifeless room. Previously, Duo had stayed with Heero at the apartment for a mission they both had together. It was a simple job, it didn't take long to accomplish. After that mission, Duo left, he returned back to whatever it was he did before. This was the way things were. The way they were supposed to be. Heero tilted his head, faintly annoyed by this point.

     It's so damn quiet without him around.

     Heero clenched his teeth. He couldn't believe this! Before Duo arrived he was fine! He was doing damn well! There was only his mind and the mission, now he thought about that braided-haired boy between every other thought. And- he couldn't help it. He really couldn't. The main problem was, Duo was a boy. Not a girl. He was having intimate feelings, for a boy. And he wasn't sure, but he had a pretty good idea that boy with boy wasn't right. That a round peg can't fit through a square hole. It wasn't natural. Would Duo be disgusted if he knew exactly what raced through Heero's mind when Duo emerged from the shower? If he knew just what was playing out in Heero's mind he would have left screaming.

     Heero lifted the remote, switching on the television set. He moved across the small room, pulling his shirt over his head painfully in the process. His entire body was beginning to turn numb.

     "Today in the news, the still ever popular drug on the hidden black market is 'Phantom Utopia', a drug that induces a false sense of reality, has been causing problems among the youth. It's been proven that the drug has drastic, deadly side affects and the smallest dosage throws you into an instant addiction. Officers have so far made no comments or plan to stop the drug ring that is viciously growing. In other news-"

     Heero snapped his gaze to the door. He heard a soft, knock, gently being tapped on the door. Heero's teeth held firm together, his fingers crumbling inwards to reach for his gun. But the knocking was so gentle. It wasn't threatening. It was faint, and weak. Heero halted his attempt to collect his gun, he could handle it, without the gun. He didn't even ask who was at the door, he simply opened it right then. Standing at the door, was Duo. He had two suitcases held tightly in each hand, his hair was a mess. A tangled braid that spurted out a few loose strands. His long, black trench coat was soiled with mud, and he looked exhausted. Heero froze, his fingers digging into the wood of the door, his voice curt and dark.

     "Hn. It's you," As pre-mentioned, curt and dark.

     Duo for a moment looked offended, "Huh? 'It's you'? What kind of greeting is that! It's been four weeks! You should say 'oh wow! Duo! You're back!' not.. that"

     Heero's gaze was narrowed. "Ah. Why are you here?"

     Duo chewed on his lower lips, one of his suitcases hitting against the floor. He was so tired, so worn. He could barely stand, "Because- I don't got no place else to go-"

     Heero could see Duo's worn body, and yet he still didn't offer him to come inside. "Duo. The mission is over, we are to part ways. Those are the orders, it is the way things are done."

     The American boy growled softly, grunting his frustrations, "Heero! Fuck! You want me to sleep out in the damn street tonight? I told you! I don't have anywhere else!" Duo lifted his free hand to rub at his face, sighing softly, "I- don't have anyone else- to go to." Silence. No words were exchanged between the two for a while. Duo was simply staring at the floor, his face showing his anguish. Heero's stubborn form finally made a move, his hands reached, snatching Duo's suitcases up. "Close the door-" Heero murmured.

     Duo fashioned a broad smile, closing the door behind himself, "Thanks a lot man! I really owe you big this time! I didn't mean to interrupt you and all seeing as you got some time off, but I wanted to catch you before you left here." Heero set the suitcases down beside Duo's futon, turning to address Duo after the action. Duo had slipped off his coat. His clothes were torn, and he smelled horrible. "You're filthy," Heero stated the obvious. Duo quirked his mouth, "Yeah, you don't smell like roses either." Duo's finger reached to prod at a wound on Heero's bare chest, "And I see you're still not taking care of yourself." Heero growled, recoiling away from Duo's touch. Duo's smile broadened, "Sorry- didn't mean to hurt you. I'll stay out of your way Heero. I promise."

+++

     Duo waited until he was certain that Heero was out of the room. Duo nimbly dragged towards the bathroom, pulling his clothes from off his body gently. He felt filthy. Not simply on the outside, but inside he felt even filthier. And no matter how many times he'd wash, he'd never clean those feelings away. Emotions and memories were so painful. He lifted his body underneath the run of warm water from the showerhead, letting it cleanse the smudges of dirt from off his arms and legs. He was sure the last time he showered was two weeks ago at least.

     Terrace...

     Duo shut his eyes, holding them closed tightly. If he did cry, the shower would hide his tears. No one would know. He would shed tears. A loved one had died, it was natural to shed tears when they die. That was understandable. Duo knew why he'd returned to Heero. With Heero, he felt safe. He never told the stoic boy that, but it was true. Heero's cold, personality forced him to be strong. It forced him not to cry. It helped to suppress the anguish, because he knew if he released it, Heero would scold him horribly. He half expected Heero to not let him stay. He didn't think he'd luck out.

     The shower was long, his hair was completely soaked, but clean. Heero had kept his shampoos exactly where he left them. His room had been untouched. It was comforting, and confusing. Duo wrapped a towel around his head, leaving the shower was perhaps the hardest thing for Duo. But it was usual. After someone he knew closely died, he had to keep on living. And that was the hardest thing to do. Keep on living, and pretend. Pretend to be all right, hide your tears, instead, and display the most beautiful smile. Play your mission, play the role, and play the fool. Duo rubbed insistently at his wet hair, a few, long stresses of chestnut escaped the towel, teasing his naked shoulders. What was worse than living, was dreaming. His dreams were cruel torments, which would only remind him of what was lost. He could only hope for the night to pass quickly.

     Duo pulled a white shirt over his head, and then slid on a pair of cotton, pull-string pants. Clean! At last, he never thought he'd get the smell of L2 off his skin! Duo opened his door, peering out into the living room of the apartment. It was dim; the only light source was a single lamp off in the corner by the window. This was the first time he really looked at the apartment. The floors wooden, hardly any furniture. Such was Heero's expert taste. A blue couch was up against the wall near the television set. Duo shifted his sight to Heero's door. It was wide open, the moon light lit his room so brightly, shifting purple beams that danced on the hard, wood floors. Duo leaned to the side slightly, peering into the room. When he'd stayed with Heero three weeks ago, he remembered that he found Heero always slept by the window. It was like he was always expecting to have a way of escape.

     "You should be sleeping-" A deep, cool voice stated. Duo snapped his sight to his left where the table was. Heero was sitting on the table, one leg hanging off the table to touch the floor as the other he kept propped up, resting his elbow on it. His sneakers scraped the slick floors. Duo smiled, it was forced, but it looked just as good. Duo rubbed his hands on his pants anxiously, "Yeah well, I'm a little hungry." Heero bitterly turned his gaze away, "Ah." Duo tightened his mouth. Heero was being a real ass! The violet-eyed boy moved past Heero, heading towards the fridge to rummage through for edibles. His eyes searched to see a box of baking soda, a bottle of soy sauce, and a stick of butter. What did Heero eat? Air? Duo began to feel frustrated, turning up his head to glare at Heero, but instead of his eyes meeting Heero, they met with a white plastic bag.

     "Okonomiyaki. It has Katsuobushi, and Aonori. It's pawn... you did like prawn- did you not?" Heero asked, placing the bag into Duo's hand.

     Duo held the bag tightly, staring at the red letters printed on the bag. He nodded, a faint silly smile touching his mouth, "Yeah. I mean- yes, I do. It's from Nozaki's place! You have to wait in line forever to get something from her place-" Heero's smoldering eyes detoured their gaze to the table, "Hai. Kotoko Nozaki sends her love; she insisted that I get the Gyoza for you. It's in there as well." Duo's smile broadened, he quickly placed the bag down on the table, quickly pulling open the Styrofoam packaging. "Her gyoza is awesome! It's usually always gone by the time I get there! Especially the Chinese style Gyoza! And at this time of evening! How'd you get through the line so quickly? I- thanks Heero," Duo's thanks was sincere, for once he actually felt a moment of happiness. The Wing pilot soberly slid off the table, instead he slid into a chair near Duo's. Duo excitedly, and gingerly began to eat the okonomiyaki with enthusiasm. "Mm, damn this is good. Man, I kinda missed her food. I always talk about L2 and the food from there, but every time I go there I just get more disappointed."

     Sometimes, even memories can be better than the event itself. Every time I go there, I come back feeling- so burned.

     Heero reached his hand out to grasp a pair of chopsticks, grasping hold of some gyoza from his own container. "Then why do you constantly return there?" Heero asked a simple enough question, but Duo had difficulty coming up with an answer. "Because- my soul- is buried there," Duo said those words softly, following them with a mouthful of food. Heero placed a small amount of food into his mouth, chewing slowly, "Quatre is currently in town." Duo grinned, "Yeah! I know, pretty hard not to know when Quatre's in town. I swear it's like he's a damn king or something, he travels with a big crowd. Sometimes I really wonder how he got into this biz, ya know?" "Because he has money, which means he has contacts, and can go into the politics we cannot," Heero's answer was so uniformed. Duo snorted, "Yeah, well I think it's stupid. If I had things going as good for me as Quatre does I would have never gotten into this." Heero reminded silent on that aspect. The Japanese boy leaned closer to observe his comrade, "You knew Quatre was in town-" "Yeah, your point being?" "He is generous, he has a lavish, large place he's staying at. He can offer you the comfort and support you desire. Why are you here?"

     Duo's chopsticks fell from his fingers, there sound rattled in Duo's mind loudly as they hit the table's surface. Duo could feel the weight of his braid. He felt a little frustrated, perhaps even annoyed, "Look- if you don't want me here I can leave." "If you can leave, why haven't you?" Heero was so solemn! Duo couldn't believe it! One moment he liked Heero, the next he could choke the guy! He was so damn, emotionless at times! "I- don't want to stay with Quatre, okay? End of story," Duo could feel his back bend as he stared at his food blankly. He could hear a faint noise of amusement come from Heero.

     Before Duo could protest, Heero's hand pulled Duo's food away from him. "Hey! Come on now! What are you doing, Heero?" Heero's brow was raised, was he enjoying this? "Why here and not with Quatre?" Heero still seemed to pursue this pointless topic! Duo snatched his food back, more possessive of his meal now that previously. "Because I don't want to be comforted by him. It's like he knows when something is wrong, and he comforts in the wrong way. It's just not what I need right now," Duo finalized his point. He wanted to talk no further about it. Heero could tell that. At least hero knew when to stop. He was sure that if Quatre were there, he'd continue to ask, and pry, and look hurt, and upset if he didn't answer. Quatre was just too compassionate. More importantly, Quatre wouldn't have stood in line for god knows how long in front of the tiny cookery owned by Kotoko Nozaki just to get a pizza and Chinese dumplings. He'd send a servant to do it. And Duo, loved all the little things, as simple as that.

     Duo didn't even realize how close Heero hand gotten, his hand reached to press to the side of Duo's face. The American boy quickly flinched, his eyes going wide.

     What the HELL is he thinking??

     Heero's fingers were tracing something on the side of his face. And it hurt! "You- are bruised," Heero said it flatly. He stated everything so simply. Duo hadn't even noticed that he'd gotten a bruise in the first place. He never checked the mirror. He felt so disgusted that he couldn't face himself lately. Duo lifted his hand a little embarrassed, rubbing at the bruise as if he could wish it away. "Couldn't leave L2 without a souvenir," Duo joked. "Hn." Heero didn't question it. A sound could be heard, lightly coming from Heero's room. It was his laptop. That sound was unmistakable. Duo rolled his eyes, "Jeez, they really cut your vacations short, don't they? This time it was how long, what? A six hour vacation?" He could have sworn he saw a small smile on Heero's face, but Heero turned away.

     As Heero disappeared into his room, Duo continued to eat. The food was still hot. Its flavor tickled Duo's taste buds. Seizing them mercilessly. By the time he finished, Heero had returned. Heero leaned against the doorframe, "We have a mission." "Big surprise," scoffed the Deathscythe pilot. "This is probably why Quatre is in town. Get some sleep. Mission starts tomorrow," without so much as a 'good night' Heero returned to his room, this time he closed the door. Sleep. Could he even manage that?

+++

     Terrace laughed, his red strands of hair swinging with his laughter. His face seemed to light up. His eyes gleaming, the sheer joy seemed to dazzle his pale face. "Do you think that if I turned my name to Trio, I could be like you? You said Solo gave you strength. If I was Trio, maybe I'd have your strength!"

     "Don't tell me that! Don't fucking tell me that!!" Terrace shrilled. His hair was savagely messed in awry. His clothes were torn and hanging from his body in an animalistic manner. His hand tightly held a piece of glass, streaks of blood polled over, and along his chest, dripping down to his bare toes. "Duo- help- help me-"

+++

     "Duo- Wake up," ordered Heero sternly. Duo's eyes opened heavily. The moonlight cascaded over his lips, his hair had untangled from its braided weave. Duo's knuckles felt so cold to the touch, his lips were dry, a thin layer of sweat rested on Duo's chest. Heero could clearly see, even in the dim light, that Duo had a small stream of tears rolling down his face. Duo- had cried in his sleep? Duo's body was shivering, Heero's fingers skimmed over Duo's arms. Ice, they felt like ice. He was so cold, was he stricken with fear? "W-wha?" Duo's words were as dry as his lips. "You were screaming," Heero quickly followed. He had heard Duo's ranting in his sleep, but he never expected to find that in Duo's torrid dreams he even managed to cry. Tears that stretched from past his dreams to affect his body physically.

     Duo...

     Duo was slowly beginning to regain his senses. Those same, icy fingers were now grasping to Heero's arms in return, his face, it expressed so much pain. Heero had never seen this look on Duo's face, in all his days of working with the boy. All the smiles, the jokes, were gone now. All that showed, was the pain. "Heero-" Duo murmured. He seemed uncomfortable that he was caught in such a strange situation. That hair. The mere sight of it was enough to drive Heero mad. The wavy, golden, chestnut stresses, which tenderly stroked against Duo. So hurt, yet, he still remained to have such strength. Duo's lips parted, he meant to speak, but no words would form to his lips. Heero began to loosen his grip. "Wait! D-don't go yet. Can you- just, stay here a bit?" He asked with sincerity. Heero could only nod in response. Duo wasn't crying, he seemed to only cry in his sleep, but as soon as he became aware that his face was soaked with tears, he quickly stopped.

     "Are you ready?" Heero asked blandly. The violet-eyed boy lifted his head, curiosity beginning to grip his once pained gaze. "Ready to tell me what happened?" Heero clarified. Duo's head drew down, sullen, and ashamed. "Once, when we were on a mission I met this boy- Terrace. His spirit reminded me a lot of someone I once knew. So- I made him like family. Which was stupid, because in the end his fate was the same." "He's dead," Heero did like to put it bluntly. Duo shrugged away from Heero at the cold return, "Gee, you're really tactful. Yeah, he's dead, and it's my fault." "Did you kill him?" "No-" "Then it's not your fault," Heero stared sharply at Duo. He wanted Duo to be certain, and realize that such things were not his fault. Duo's icy fingers began to gain some warmth, gripping softly to Heero's wrists, "Yeah? If that's true, then why do I feel like this?" "Because you choose to hold to your memories. Forget them, we have a mission soon." He left no time for mourning. He never did know how to deal with others emotions, but he wanted Duo to be competent for the mission. He wanted Duo to be happy, and alive again.

     Duo groaned, "Are you asking me to go back to sleep?" "Hai," Heero answered. He pushed Duo slightly, tugging at Duo's covers to slide under and join the boy. Duo's teeth clenched as he fought to keep siege of his bed, "W-what the hell do you think you're doing?? You can't get in here!" A low feral sound leap from the throat of Yuy, his Prussian eyes narrowed slits towards his comrade, "Shut up, and sleep. If you continue to scream in your sleep I will loose sleep." Duo sucked in a deep breath, grinding his teeth softly before he cramped his fingers into his pillow. "Just don't get too close to me!" Duo warned. Heero almost wanted to take Duo up on that challenge, but the 'better' half of his told him to resist that. The Deathscythe pilot turned his back to face Heero, he could feel the light tug on his hair from where Heero's arm was resting against it. Heero could feel the soft length of the strands rubbing his skin.

     Duo was fidgeting, unable to seem to settle. Maybe he was uncomfortable with Heero's presence. In any case it prevented Heero from sleeping. "One, Keeps you connected to the vehicle, so as you can take maximum advantage of the car's built in safety features," Heero began. He heard a faint snort leave Duo. "Two. Helps protect you in almost every type of crash, including rear and side impacts and rollovers," He continued. This time his words were followed by laughter, it was the first time he'd heard Duo laugh since the boy had returned there. Duo flipped over, his eyes meeting Heero's. A silly smile plagued his mouth beautifully, "What *is* that crap your saying to me?" Heero remained stoic, "When we first had this apartment, I found a book in one of the drawers. It was an old car manual." This was followed with more laughter, this time; Duo seemed to edge closer, "A car manual? You're reciting a *car manual* to me? Why?" "You have traditions to read a story when one isn't able to sleep, correct?" "Yeah?" "Then I am telling you a story," Heero confirmed. Duo laughed, his hand reaching out to pat his partner's shoulder gently. His eyes seemed so much brightly. "Stories are usually like, the 'three little pigs', or 'snow white and the seven dwarfs'. What is your story supposed to be?" "The story of automotive safety."

     More laughter, the laughs were loud and clear now, if Duo had any tears in his eyes, they were from the joy he was feeling. To see his expression to uplifted inspired Heero.

     I want to see him like this. Just the way he is now, happy.

     Duo flicked a tear from the corner of his eyes, brushing the water droplet against his pillow. His smile was genuine, Duo was happy, no, he was entertained. He hadn't even realized, how close he'd gotten to Heero. A playful glint rested in the boy's weary eyes. "So- Mother Goose, what happens next?" "Three. Helps you from being thrown against the inside of the vehicle and against other occupants." "Fascinating!" "Four. Keeps you from being thrown outside the vehicle." "Enthralling!" "If you liked four, you're going to really enjoy five. Five, helps you to take maximum advantage of the airs bags, should they deploy, thus reducing the risk of injury from an inflating airbag." The smile still remained on his face, even as Duo leaned closer to Heero. His head tipped downward, "Heero- thanks. Thank you, for- everything. This is why- I couldn't go to Quatre." "Hn. Listen to the story and sleep." "Mm, I knew you loved me!" "Duo-" "Hm?" "Shut up." "Heero, you say the sweetest things!"

+++

I Need A Lack Of Compassion
factus de material
cinis elementi
similis sum folio,
de quo ludunt venti.

     Finally, Duo had a good night's sleep. If he did dream after Heero came into his room, he couldn't remember it. He'd take the other pilots advice and forget. After all, that was all he could do. Pretend it wasn't an important factor in his life. They had a mission now. Duo tugged his black cap onto his head, staring himself over in the mirror. Ah, he looked good today. A nice, clean, black outfit and his hat. He flashed a brief smile to himself in the mirror. His smile was actually, partially real. He felt, a small tilt of entertainment in his stomach. But why? A strange console. Thinking about the previous night, drew the smile further up Duo's face. Heero- really knew how to surprise him.

     The strangest part is, I was so freaked out over him trying to join me in the bed, but when it got in. I didn't feel weird at all. It actually was nice. Maybe too nice.

     Duo didn't think much further on it. Heero was just a friend, if not a friend, then a valued comrade. Duo left his room, pulling his door shut on his way out of it. His hands clapped once, his eyes now completely turned to Heero's attention. The Japanese boy was once again seated on the table, waiting. Always waiting for Duo. Heero seemed to always be thinking ahead. Heero's eyes met with Duo's slowly, "We discuss the details of the mission when we meet up with Quatre." "A threesome mission. Damn, must be big for them to need us three, right?" Duo collected his jacket, sliding his arms within the sleeves in quick, brief movements. Heero's palms shoved the table back when he pushed his body from off of it. "It's a scrub mission," Heero calmly informed. Duo rolled his eyes. Scrub missions. Clean out. That usually meant destruction. Not Quatre's favorite kind of mission. He seemed to prefer missions where computers were targets. Heero and Duo however, had no problem with breaking necks to accomplish the objective. Duo was the God of Death after all! He had a name to live up to!

     "Let's get a move on then, no time to waste!" Duo cheerfully instilled, pulling the door open for himself and his comrade. Heero grunted and stepped out along side of him.

     The crowded streets were filled to the brim. Families, lovers, friends. Laughing, talking, and shouting to one another. Such a clatter of life and sound. Duo's mind was trying to draw in all the chatter at once. The voices becoming louder, their movements were faster. The world around him seemed to intensify.

     "But I love him, I can't just get rid of him!" "If I were you, I'd just kill him." "Oh Saki! You can't be serious?"

     "Our ratings will sky rocket if we just kill the competition!"

     "They're only trying to offer, hopes, wishes, and dreams, brought to life."

     Duo raised a hand to his head, trying to steady his thoughts. Trying to block out the sounds around him. Yet he could hear each voice in the boisterous, disgusting crowd. A hand held his arm, keeping him steady. Duo turned his head to the side, noticing that Heero had a grip on his arm. Heero looked so displeased. Duo returned a nervous smile. "You- were loosing balance-" Heero notified. Duo squinted for a moment, a crimson of embarrassment, and frustration briefly tingeing his cheeks, "Fuck, I can't even stand up right." "Hn." Heero didn't need to say it. Duo knew what Heero was thinking. "Look, I can handle this mission, all right?" "You'd better..."

     That is so typical of him. His only concern is the overall success of the mission. Sometimes it's a comfort to see him to determined and dedicated. Other times...

     As they continued, the streets became quieter, and there were lesser and lesser people. Until finally, there were hardly any people in that certain part of town at all.

     "Ha! Look! Look at those two damn Homosexuals! Arm-in-arm!" teased a teenaged boy. He nudged his friend who laughed loudly, "Queers! Disgusting!!"

     It took a second before Duo realized that the boys were referring to him and Heero. Duo gnashed his teeth in the boy's direction, refusing to take a single step further as he raised his finger in their direction. "Go fuck yourself! We're not gay, you damn homophobes!" Heero didn't even seem to acknowledge the boys who continued their taunting as Heero pushed Duo's back, forcing him to move on in his own silent reverie. Duo growled, lowering his head as his braid smacked against his back. "Damn! People like that get me so pissed off! It makes me wonder what we're even trying to save this world for! They sure as hell don't appreciate it."

     How could those stupid kids think I was gay? Just because I was fucking- holding- Heero's arm.

     Duo reddened. He didn't really think about it, but he had held Heero's arm. The one person he was certain would rip his arm off before he'd let him hold it. But that Heero offered that arm for support. And he didn't even think twice of it. It felt too natural. Duo rubbed at his mouth, trying to hide the growing color of red to his face. "Say- um, Heero. Why didn't you say anything to those boys?" Duo was curious. Heero he acted like they didn't say anything offensive. Heero's profile was in clear view to Duo, his expression was so indifferent. "Yelling at them would be fruitless," Heero's eyes stayed ahead. Duo raised a brow, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand, "Why do you figure? Sometimes, don't you ever get mad and just let it all burst out?" "I wasn't mad to begin with," Heero dryly spoke. "They had their minds made up. Nothing we could say would change their opinions. You may as well argue with a brick wall, the results are the same," Heero added, his hands were now tucked into the pockets of his black, jacket.

     Heero. I agree, it would have been pointless. But sometimes, I think a person should stand for what they believe in.

     Duo had to rethink. Stand up for what he believed in? Was he trying to say to himself that he was gay? It was too much to think about.

     "Stop. We are here," Heero's voice interrupted Duo's thoughts. As usual, Quatre spared no expense. It was a white mansion, a large; swan floating was in front of the large establishment. A straight row of rose bushes leaded to the front doors. "Think he could be any more discreet?" Duo teased. Heero kept his sight on the door, pulling Duo along forcefully with him. Duo begrudgingly protested Heero's tight grip until the door opened to reveal Quatre. Quatre looked so much better than the last time they met. His face was rounder; he looked so full of light, and life. His smile was broad; his golden, platinum hair was a fine, series of tendrils that the wind sifted with ease. His figure was just so easy on the eyes.

     "Heero! Duo! It's so good to see you both!" Quatre exclaimed, his arms extended to grasp both of the boys shoulders, "Please! Feel free to come inside." Heero grunted, "We're not here to catch up on old times Quatre." Duo smiled, pushing away from the two as soon as his nose caught the scent of food. "Speak for yourself Heero! I'm starving!" Quatre laughed, nodding his head towards a maid, motioning for her to bring out the dishes for Duo. "Heero, I understand the mission is at hand. Thalia will bring Duo his desired edibles and we shall all consort over the plan in the study."

     Duo stepped into Quatre's study, at to be expected, the study was quite large. In the back of the room was a large chalkboard, set up with tactically formulated routes and courses of actions. Quatre stepped up to the board, rubbing his chin as he tried to recollect his own handwriting. "I was reading over the information details of the mission last night. I think they were left fairly vague. We were asked to take our mobile suits and infiltrate an Oz encampment that was developing a defense system against us. Our job is to go in and wipe out all the equipment," Quatre motioned to a line of information he'd listed. Duo greedily dug his fingers into the tray Thalia offered him, collecting a handful of the small meat rolls. "So? I don't see the problem, we go in, we blast, we come home," Duo concluded, shoving a roll into his mouth savagely. Heero snorted at Duo's action, "Quatre, simply because a mission seems illogical doesn't mean we shouldn't follow it." Quatre shook his head, "But that's just it Heero! I think that we should! Sometimes it takes more than following orders- you have to follow your heart too sometimes." Quatre returned to the chalkboard, "Oz has no reason to build a defense system against us. They're important bases already have a defense system. And they wouldn't want to protect the cities. They consider civilians to be a way of keeping us from harming them." Heero leaned back into his seat, "You believe the colonies are leaving out details?" "I believe the colonies have a different agenda and they're only claiming to us that they desire peace! If we go there- and destroy these civilians it goes against everything we've stood for!" Quatre sighed, closing his eyes tightly.

     Duo swallowed down the roll, taking large bits out of the bread and meat until his belly was filled with it. "You know what is messed up? The civilians should be singing our praises, yet they all seem to think of us as the black plague." "We are. They simply can't see the bigger picture," Heero intervened. Quatre nodded, "Well, I can't see the bigger picture. Those soldiers have wives, and children-" "Then what do you fucking suggest?" Heero growled, pushing up from his seat as his cold eyes gaped at the blonde boy. Quatre sucked in his lip, "I suggest, that one of us go in a Gundam, and the others go in as ground units. If two of us can get into the base and stop the production with as little damage to human life as possible, we still succeed the mission. Or at least set the production back by ten years. Should there be any difficulties, we have the one unit in a Gundam that can be the 'demolition man'." Heero slammed his boot against the leg of his chair, shoving it to the ground.

     "Winner-Sama!" Thalia cried out, her hand reaching towards Quatre, "Should I call the guards?" Quatre swallowed, his eyes staring back into Heero's, "No- that won't be necessary." Heero's disheveled hair wavered in his gaze. Duo stood to his feet, pushing back on Heero's shoulder, "Oi! Heero, calm yourself! I think Quatre's got a point." Heero's teeth grinded, his expression loosing its aggression. "Fine. Quatre, we will do as you request-" Heero turned to leave, brushing off Duo's hand, "But sometimes you're too damn compassionate." Quatre smiled softly, "I'm sorry if I have unconvinced you and Duo. Duo, would you please stay here for a moment?" Duo snapped his sight back to Quatre, shuffling to move back from Heero as he left the room. Quatre waited until Heero left, then asking Thalia to close the door and leave them in privacy.

     Quatre sighed, "Heero- does he hate me?" Duo rubbed the back of his head. He wasn't very good with dealing in this kind of stuff. "Ah- well, Quatre. I know for a fact Heero doesn't hate you. I think at times he's a little jealous," Duo explained. Quatre looked genuinely curious, "Jealous? Of what?" "Your upbringing, your family, your life style, and the fact that you possess a sense of being and feeling what you want."

     Hell, I even envy you for that. Heero and I- we're just not like you Quatre. You are a perfect, being of compassion. Heero and I- we're- well. We're very different. We are spawned from a darker history.

     Quatre smiled faintly, "Then send him my apologies again. You really seem to know Heero, better than anyone else." Duo waved a hand, his eyes shifting to the ground, "We just have an understanding." "How was your vacation, Duo?" Quatre asked earnestly. Duo brushed his hand over his bruise. He'd forgotten that it was still very visible. Duo tried to nonchalantly brush off the question, "It was fine." "What did you do?" "I just did things." "Like what?" "I don't need to be interrogated, Quatre," Duo said a little more forcefully. There it was. The reason why Duo couldn't go to Quatre. Those eyes. They looked so disappointed, so concerned. "Something- happened?" "Quatre, we have a mission, can we stay focused to it, please?" Duo asked. Quatre nodded, looking still upset, "As you wish, but Duo. If something did happen you can tell me." "No- actually. I can't. Compassion may be what the people at the facility need, but it's not what I need. Not now." Duo tried to draw a smile to his lips, waving lightly, "Thanks for the food Quatre. I'm going to go catch up with, Heero. If you need to contact me, you know where to reach me."

     I'm sorry Quatre. I never intended to seem rude. Your pity is something that I don't need right now. I need- strength

     "Heero?" Duo stepped outside of Quatre's manor, watching Heero's form leaned against the pillars near the door. "Hn." Heero made to effort to say anything more than that. But it was enough to make Duo smile, joining his comrade at his side, "Can't say we didn't see it coming." "You and I will go into the base. Quatre will man the Gundam," Heero informed. "Quatre? But- he would hesitate to fire! You know how he is!" "When he is forced to see only one alternative we will change his conceptions. Your skills are competent for joining me inside," Heero said the words in his cool, monotone voice. Duo laughed, "Competent? Is that your way of trying to tell me that you have faith in my abilities? Why, thank you!"

     I stand beside him. It's the most natural thing in the world. In a way, I've felt like I've stood by him forever. My mind can't really even conceive the things, that will happen next...

     But I eagerly await them. :)

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Final Note: The other parts are done, but I won't post it right away. *sigh* Okay, I smell another epic, but I hope to make this short. If you have actually read this far, I salute you. >_<