More Warnings: 1x2, 3x4(implied) In this chapter Trowa is a little more ooc than usual, much to the other characters surprise.
.Scathed Light.
The Ashes Hold My Dreams
So what are you going to try and convince me of today?
Hm? What? My mind is already made up,
can't you see that? My life is worthless,
so I'm ready to die at anytime..
Duo glowered at his watch. He was standing with Quatre, Wufei and Trowa in a line to try and get into the club. It was a long line, filled with all sorts of people dressed in various, flashy, colorful clothes. "Heero's always on time for a mission, but never on time for something simple like this!" Duo growled as he kept checking his watch. Heero had told them that he'd get dressed and be over there at 10:00, it was 10:30. "What if Heero was in an accident?" Quatre asked worriedly, wearing white pants and a plum colored vest. Duo slowly shook his head with a weak smile, "Nah, Heero wouldn't be so reckless. He isn't me you know." Quatre looked a little relived, his face softening as he commented, "You know him pretty well, ne? Wufei! Where are you going?" Wufei was stepping out of the line to head towards a store near by, "This is injustice, I'm going to wait at the store, you can come and collect me when you have reached the front of the line." Quatre bite his lip, giving Trowa a worried glance before he moved to follow Wufei.
"Ch' He's so impatient," Duo scoffed, snapping his gaze back to his watch. Trowa's face remained void of emotion, "Just as you are for the arrival of Heero." Trowa sure was talkative lately. Duo felt a small sting within him as he tried to shake the feeling away, "This is different I owe him a drink." "Duo.." "Nani?" "On L2, during the previous mission I was chased by two spies," Trowa whispered, his eyes remaining ahead as he spoke nonchalantly. "Yeah, and I caught one and Wufei caught the other. And Heero slapped them around for a bit and they committed suicide," Duo summarized, death was no concern to him, able to say the words with ease and no guilt. "Mm, well. When I had to hide from them I sought haven in the church-" "So? What is wr-" Duo froze. Suddenly, the priest he confessed to came clear to his memory. Trowa whispered in a low, softly disguised voice, "You are forgiven child." "Y-you were in the confessional booth! D-damn you! Trowa why the hell didn't you say so before I poured my guts out to you! You're not bound by oath!" Duo hissed, feeling a mixture of fear and anger rise in him. "Yes I am, I made a promise that night, one I will never break. And Duo.. you really needed to talk to someone. You would have never said it to anyone else-" "Damn right I wouldn't!"
The American folded his arms, now looking sullen and irritated as his gaze lowered. "The reason I am telling you this is because just as I was accepting of your words that day, I will always be."
"Father, it's been so long since I've been in confession.."
"What trouble's you, child?"
"I'm.. almost scared to admit what I've done.."
"All that you say here will remain completely confidential and never pass from me."
"I'm having feelings for someone.."
Trowa reached a hand to rest against Duo's shoulder, "You sounded as I and Quatre had when we were coming to terms with our feelings." Duo didn't know whether to be more surprised with the fact that Trowa was the priest, or with the fact that Trowa was actually trying to comfort him. Duo shrugged off Trowa's hand, trying to look unaffected, "It's different for the both of you, you felt something towards each other. I have an insignificant little crush on Heero and he feels nothing for me." "Relena.. has a crush. You're in love with him. She believes that she has the power to change him with her love. You, accept who he is, no matter if he loves you or not, you don't care. You sacrifice for him, even though he gives you nothing in return. You love him." "Yamero! Heero is just-" "Just what?" "Ahhh. Heero! You're here!"
Duo gaped at Heero. It was Heero wasn't it? Heero was wearing a pair nicely fitting black jeans. His shirt was a deep, rich, hunter green satin, which buttoned up the front. It had short sleeves, and was loose and airy upon his body, letting the wind flap it against his chest. Heero looked good in green. Actually he looked good all around. It helped to heighten Heero's already high, sexual appeal. The Japanese kept his features emotionless. Well, he wasn't threatening to kill Duo, so obviously he hadn't heard their conversation. "You're late!" Duo scolded. "That is irrelevant. You're not even inside," Heero say impassively. Duo clenched his teeth lightly, "Fine, I'm going to get us in there, you just watch."
Duo cut to the front of the line, the large, gauntly looking bouncer lowering a glare to Duo. What excuse could he possibly think of to get in there? "Duo! Duo!" Called a light, delicious voice. As the American wisped his gaze around he caught sight of a girl running from inside the club to meet up to Duo. Her hair was short, flowing curls of raven black, her eyes a delightful crystal blue. Her face was round and youthful, her lips a sleek, cherry red. Her appearance signaled 'candy apple', wearing a bright red skirt and short, strapless tank top that was glossy and reflected the club lights. "Sakura?" "Let him in, he's a friend!" Suddenly the violet-eyed boy felt very smug. "Oi! Guys, comeon.. I got us in."
"Duo! That is your name isn't it? Please, you have to dance with me!" Pleaded a redheaded girl that latched on to Duo's arm. The Club was in the dark; a mysterious mist flowed over the grounds enveloping the area. The strange, flashing white, disco lights spraying over the walls and the 'stop motion' moving bodies across the dance floor. The bar had the faintest light, merely just showing the bartender. The place was crowded, people compacted in the dance area as the DJ above was scratching the mixes of the songs.
Duo laughed lightly to the redheaded girl, "Hey! Take it easy!" The girl blushed and released his arm, "I- I'm sorry." Heero stood behind Duo looking fairly annoyed with the situation. Duo always had a mob of girls attracted towards him, even guys. All Duo had to do was smile and they were wrapped up in him. And the stupid American gave each one the proper amount of attention. No one was left out. "Move," Heero said coldly as the brushed his away from Wufei and Quatre over to the bar.
Heero propped himself up on the stool at the bar, waving for the bartender to serve him a drink. The bartender gazed at Heero, questioning his age in his head silently before he returned with the boy's request. "Planning on getting drunk?" Wufei said in an arrogant manner as he sat down beside Heero. The Japanese boy lifted the glass to his lips, watching Wufei calmly, "Hn. I'm not you Wufei, I do not get drunk and risk hindering my senses." "Yuy, I know what's bothering you.." "..." Heero concealed his gaze towards his liquor, had Wufei figured it out that quickly? How? "You're- jealous of Duo. Jealous that he can attract so many people." Wufei concluded triumphantly, resulting in Heero casting him a glare. So he'd given Wufei too much credit. No one even had the slightest clue. But in a way.. I am jealous Duo.
Duo was dancing with Sakura, his one hand against her waist as his other remained high in the air with everyone else's. His feet were moving back rhythmically as he was pumping his hips and turning his head from side to side. The pure looking of joy on his face as his braid wisped about, at time his back arched, and he would pull Sakura forward, her hips leaning in dangerously close to Duo's as her body moved, and slithered with grace to the hard, techno pop.
Heero tightened his grip on the glass as he watched. Duo's lips were holding such a cocky smile, as if he cheated himself, he cheated his own death, because he controlled it. To Duo life was just a game and he got a free cheat code. And the way he was moving on the dance floor was intoxicating. Heero growled lowly, lifting his drink to take a heavy swallow before his eyes snapped to Wufei. Wufei was holding his own drink with a blank expression, "If I stay with you I have an excuse to not dance. Your honor will not be stained Heero, I will see to it that when you're drunk, I'll drag you home." Heero remained silent.
Duo laughed as his arms soon surrounded Sakura's waist. Her delighted, wide blue eyes gazing back into Duo's violet. "Duo.. it's been a while," Sakura said lightly into his ear as she leaned forward, her fingers delicately touching his shoulder. Duo smiled faintly as the tempo to their dancing slowed to a slow, acid melody. "Since we met on L2, it's just been a couple of months Sakura," Duo corrected her. "That was too long for me," She said simply, her red, crisp lips smiling. "Oi! Don't get ideas, I'm not the type of guy I pretended to be," he explained quickly, a light coat of sweat against his chest, causing his shirt to stick against him. Sakura's fingers massaged his shoulders lightly, "Oh? You sound like you've got a girlfriend." "Iie! Ch' it's not like that.. just my heart.. is preoccupied lately." She teasingly giggled, breathing against his ear, "Duo- if you're ever needing a break from your heart, you know where to find me.." Her hand held a card in it, one she slid into Duo's back pocket of his leather pants.
With that, she slid away, slipping from Duo's grasp to seek another dance partner amongst the mist and disco lights. It wasn't like him to turn down that perfect opportunity. Duo shook the thought away, and lifted up his arms, he tilted his head upward as he began to move to the music. His eyes closed softly, giving him the appearance of a beautiful demon, praying to the heavens for mercy. I wish.. Duo thought as his hands began to smooth over his form. Heero would.. The American parted his lips, kissing the air above, as his chin lowered his gaze widened. Heero was standing there in front of him. "Heero.." Duo said in slight surprise. He shook the surprise from his gaze, clearing his throat to speak more clearly, "Heero, what do you want? Ah, the bathroom is that way.." Heero's lips curled a feral snarl. He was obviously a little drunk, smelling of the liquor he'd drank. His arm reached out to leech around Duo's waist, pulling Shinigami close to him. "Shut up.." Heero commanded him. Heero's fingers were hooks against his waist; he could feel those cold fingers through the wetness of his shirt. Heero's snarl began to weaken as he moved, Duo soon realizing, that Heero wasn't mad with him, but dancing with him.
It was dark, and the mist was obscuring everything, no one would even see them from this back corner. Duo began to loosen; he found an unusual comfort in Heero's demanding, protective hold. He lifted his arms, slowly wrapping them around Heero's neck. His chest bumped against Heero's lean body, the wet fabric brushing to his satin shirt. Duo held to Heero tightly. He had to be dreaming! He's drunk! He would never do this if he weren't. Heero, teasing me like this when tomorrow you won't even remember it. Never taking the blame.. Heero leaned his head forward solemnly, letting his forehead touch gently against Duo's. Heero's face however remained stone hard, not softening in the least from his usual. The American inhaled deeply, filling his nose with Heero's scent as he could feel Heero's hot breath against him.
"Dancing with death," Heero mused in a low tone. Duo kept his hips moving to the rhythm, a smile breaking to his face, "Yeah, well you're drunk buddy. Take it easy, you're wounded." "Everyone is in love with Death," Heero continued. Duo's violet eyes sank into the depths of Heero's smoldering blue. "Not everyone. Heero, we should take you home-" "Iie!" Heero growled sharply, holding Duo roughly. Heero's lips gained a wry smile. The wasn't your normal smile, it was a half smile, a smile you'd see a sadistic villain wear after tearing the head off a bunny and musing at the way it's blood flowed. Heero leaned further, his cheek-brushing Duo's as his lips touched the braided-boy's ear. "I'm just starting to have fun Duo," He whispered.
Duo's senses were going insane from how close Heero was to him. Heero's body meshed against his own, their heat mingling into the mystical bliss. Even if Heero was drunk, a part of Duo never wanted to leave this moment. You idiot, you can't do this, he thinks you're his friend, when he's sober, he'll kill you for giving in! "Itai!" Duo released as Heero's hand gripped firmly to his braid. "Duo, I know about you. I know things about you no one else does. I notice how you brush your hair three times before you braid it. I know how you hide mangas in your mobile suit to read during missions. I know how you stare out the window, and I know what you're thinking when you stare out the window.." "Heero-" "Shut up! Shut your mouth and listen to me!" Heero growled, his grip tightening. "You feel now guilt for those whom you've killed in the past. It is your religious mission; you are death, passing judgment. But when you stare out the window.. you contemplate whether what your doing is right. And with all of your wicked-righteousness you begin to feel guilty, but if you name yourself Shinigami.. you're simply doing your job. It's to ease your pain." Duo shut his eyes tightly; hissing this words through his clenched teeth, "Shut the hell up Heero!" "I know your pain shinigami, the horns on my head are the same as yours, and we're wicked. And only you look at me as if I've never done anything wrong. Open your eyes dammit! Look at me!" Duo lifted his eyes open slowly, looking into Heero's eyes.
"You've lived this long, you have a purpose. Duo.." Heero's voice began to slow down as the liquor began to lax his face. Duo kept hold of the Japanese pilot, staring at him in utter shock, "Heero?" At that point, Duo had stopped breathing, he couldn't think, time froze, because Heero's lips were softly against his own. Heero's lips were nothing like he'd expected. Heero's lips were soft, warm, and moist, covering his mouth in velvet soft as the kiss caressed his lips. Heero was too drunk to press the kiss forcefully, and Duo submitted himself to it instantly. Duo was filled with a strange feeling, butterflies that ate at his stomach, lust that filled his loins, and the need to keep Heero close. He could have laughed, he could have cried, an inferno of emotions. But nothing, nothing could ever prepare him for what he felt next.
In Duo's mind he saw a brief glimpse of Heero at nine, sitting on the floor staring at the blood that stained his hands, and Heero was trembling, but did not cry or scream. "Who am I?" He could hear Heero think. And after those words were said, Heero ripped away from the kiss..
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. (Except for a few originals like Sakura) This is strictly fan fiction on the televised series Gundam Wing. It is for non-profit and I am in no way affiliated with it. (duh!) Purely entertainment based here.