A Crumb's Worth 4
Helpless
I do not own Digimon
Takato couldn't wait for Monday and at the same time, he dreaded it. He'd see Jeri first thing in the morning and she probably wouldn’t look back. He was certain he wouldn't let him walk her to her next class. Takato felt so helpless, so angry. Why did it have to be Jeri? Why did she do to deserve this? If there were a way he could erase all what happened to her, he'd do it in a heartbeat. Jeri didn't have to go through all that pain. Takato would give anything to take Jeri's place. Even though he loved his Digimon partner Guilmon and he created him with just a colored pencil and a piece of paper, he'd let him die so that Leomon wouldn't have to. Guilmon probably would've gladly taken Leomon's place also. He was so much like his creator Takato. Takato wished he were the one to pick up that piece of chaos, to become possessed with it. He wanted to be trapped inside the D-Reaper's brain, wondering if the others would come for him or not.
"Why did it have to be Jeri?" Takato demanded himself. "She deserves only the best in the world!"
He went to school without breakfast, still wondering what he could have done. He shouldn't have gotten so angry, so mad when Beezlemon killed Leomon. He shouldn't have forced Guilmon to digivolve into mega. What he should have done was be there for Jeri. She needed to be comforted. She didn't need to see Guilmon change into a monster. All he did was add more heartache to Jeri. Talkato sat in his seat feeling helpless and looking around for Jeri. She hadn't come yet and class was about to start. Jeri was never late for class. She was always on time, sometimes the first person there. Takato feared the worse. What if she and her dad left town? He'd never see her again. But Takato pushed this thought away. No, they had court this Friday, Jeri was still attending school here and her dad had a business to run. But still, where was she? She couldn't have skipped school for work, did she? He began tapping his fingers on the desk. He wanted her here. He had to know if she was all right. Thirty seconds before the bell rang, Jeri came in the door. She caught Takato's eyes and quickly looked down as she went to her seat. She could feel his eyes on her and it bothered the hell out of her.
'Please stop looking at me that way, Takato,' Jeri thought. She didn't have to look at him to know he was looking at her with that, 'let me help you look'. She could feel it. She knew Takato.
'Oh, Jeri,' Takato thought, 'I want to help you, if you'd just let me.'
It was torture being in homeroom with her now. Not being able to see her smile or to work with her. He hated it. She avoided his eyes at all costs. Then the bell rang and Jeri quickly got up and left before Takato could say a word to her. Takato walked out of the room and watched her walk to her next class alone. He hated seeing her alone. He hated seeing her in pain. It made him want to die. He stood there for a moment, then it dawned on him, the others didn't know and he was certain that Jeri wouldn't tell them. Takato had to let them know. If he couldn't help her, maybe they could. Takato sprinted down the hall and got to the gym doors just as Kazu was opening them up.
"Well, look who's on time!" Kazu cracked.
"No time for jokes, Kazu," Takato muttered, "to the locker room. I've got something to tell you guys."
"Sounds important." Kazu said, following him.
"It is."
The two got into the locker room where there was already Kenta and Henry.
"Where's Ryo?" Takato asked.
"Here I am," Ryo said, stepping from a corner applying deodorant to his underarms.
"Ryo, don't even try," Kazu said. "No matter how much--"
"Shut up, Kazu!" Takato shouted. Kazu gasped. "Guys, I've got some bad news."
"What's up, Takato?" Henry asked, sitting on the bench to tie his shoelaces.
"I know what's the matter with Jeri," Takato asked.
"And?" Kenta questioned, hopeful. "It's nothing serious, right?"
"Wrong, Kenta," Takato shook his head. "It's serious. I asked her to the dance and she can't come with me because she'll have to be in court."
"Court? For what?" Kazu asked. He almost hit himself in the face while opening his locker.
"Her father and step mom," he said hesitantly, "they're getting a divorce."
The guys looked at Takato as if he were joking.
"No way," Henry said, "that's awful. Jeri never told us anything about this."
"Poor Jeri," Kenta mumbled, "she must feel terrible. No wonder her poem was so sad."
"I wonder…if there's anything we can do," Kazu said, getting ready to change.
"I've tried helping her," Takato told them, "but she's so upset that she refuses my help. She wants us to leave her alone."
"I understand she wants to be left alone," Ryo stated, "but I think she's been alone long enough. She needs to know that we're here for her."
"I told her that," Takato whispered.
"Let's all try talking to her in our classes," Kazu suggested.
"But she doesn't want to talk."
"Then she should just listen," Kazu said. "And we'll do the talking. I've got her in study hall and we can talk all period."
"Yeah, Kazu has a point," Ryo said, "if we leave her alone, then she'll just get more lonely. She says that's what she wants, but that's not what she needs. She needs her friends right now."
They nodded in agreement and went outside to warm up.
****
Kenta hurried to creative writing, hoping to see Jeri there. She wasn't in her seat then remembered that her chemistry class wasn't close to creative writing. Kenta sat down in his seat and waited for Jeri. When Jeri came in class, Kenta jumped up and hugged her.
"Oh Jeri! I just heard!" He cried, tightening his arms around her. "I'm so sorry."
"Sorry about what?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. She tried to make it look like nothing was wrong.
Kenta kept an arm around her and helped her to her seat as if she had a dizzy spell. Then he knelt down beside her.
"Takato told me about your dad and step mom," he replied.
"Oh," she said. 'I thought so,' she thought.
Kenta took her hand in both of his. "If there's anything I can do just let me know."
"Thanks, Kenta," she whispered, slipping her hand away, "but there's nothing you can do."
"Okay." He mumbled and sat down. She acted exactly how he expected. He focused on his assignment then the bell rang for the next class. Kenta got up and felt Jeri's hand on his shoulder.
"Uh, Kenta?"
"Yeah?" he turned around.
"I just wanted to say…I'm quiting the journalism club."
"But you just joined Friday!" he cried. "Don't you like journalism?"
"Oh, sure I do," she said. "I love to write and I know you need help on the school paper and all, but I just can't come anymore."
"Why not?"
She tightened her fingers on her book, "I just can't, all right? Just drop it! Now I'm sorry, but I can't come to journalism anymore!" she pushed passed him hard, nearly knocking him into his desk, making him drop his books and took off.
"Jeri!" Kenta cried, picking his books back up. He got out of class and looked around for her. "Oh, darn. I lost her!"
Jeri hurried to her math class, 'I bet Henry knows too!' she thought angrily. 'Did Takato tell the whole damn world?' She came to class and there was the ever-so-prompt Henry Wong sitting at his desk. Jeri avoided his eyes and went to her seat.
'I bet she doesn't want to talk,' Henry said, 'but she doesn't have to say anything. Just listen.' Henry sighed and went to her desk. "Jeri, Takato told me about your dad and step mom. I'm sorry."
"Thanks, Henry," she said, staring at her desk.
"Is there anything I can do?"
"No, thanks," she replied.
Henry nodded and went back to his seat. Then Jeri stood up, getting something. "Henry, wait, there is something."
"Yes?"
"Be good to Suzie. Help her with her homework," she said, trying to keep her tears back, "and be good to all your brothers and sisters. You're lucky to have a big family that loves you. Stay close to your mom and dad. I made a mistake not doing that. Now my family's falling apart because of it."
"It's not your fault they're getting a divorce," Henry insisted.
Jeri shook her head, not wanting to hear all that 'it's not your fault and everything will be okay nonsense.' "Just be good to your family, okay?" she asked, a tear forming slowly in her eye. "Tell them all the time that you love them and give them hugs and kisses. Can you do that for me?"
Henry was taken back, "Y-yeah, I can do that."
"Thanks, Henry." Jeri sat down.
Henry almost felt his eyes tearing. He remembered when he made Suzie cry and she said something he'd never forget: "I wish you weren't my brother." He never wanted to hear her say that again.
Jeri's half brother and stepmother will be moving out of town and her life for good. Jeri never got a chance to let her step mom into her life because she didn't want someone to take her place. She wasn't a good half-sister to Masahiko either. Henry knew Jeri was right. He should be grateful to have a family that was so solid, brothers and sisters and a mother and father that loved each other. His family was thriving and Jeri's was falling apart. He had to let them know he cared. He wasn't sure how he would take it if a family member died or his parents decided to have a divorce.
Class was over quickly and Henry grabbed hold of Jeri's shoulder before she left her seat.
"Thanks, Jeri." He said.
"For what?" she asked.
"Making me realize what I had without having to lose it first." Henry squeezed her shoulder, "usually you don't know what you've got until it's gone. I don't know if I'll be able to handle it if my family had to split. I'm very sorry about your family, Jeri. Just…just take care, okay?"
Jeri lifted up her hand and let it lay on Henry's for a while before she took it off. For a split second, she was used to getting comfort but she didn't deserve it.
"Yeah," she mumbled, "you just do what I asked, okay?"
Henry nodded and Jeri walked away before he could say another word. He was about to suggest that they go to lunch together. He went to his locker and put his things away. He heard a voice behind him speak.
"Yes."
"Huh?" he turned around and saw Rika with a smile on her face. "Rika, what's up?" It was the seldom times he saw her smile.
"Come on, silly, you asked me to the dance this Friday." She said. "I got your note and my answer's yes."
Henry smiled, "oh, right. That's great." He forgot all about asking her, leaving a note and stuffed fox in her locker. He would've used a teddy bear but the fox reminded him of Renamon.
Rika frowned, "oh no, don't tell me you've changed your mind."
"You haven't heard, have you?" Henry asked.
"Heard what?"
Henry took her hand, "come on, there's something you should now."
The gang met at their usual table but someone was missing.
"Hey, where's Jeri?" Rika asked.
"Takato told us something in PE class," Kazu said softly.
"Which is?"
Everyone was silent in response.
"Well, what is it, guys?" Rika asked, "come on boys, do I have to beat it out of you?"
"It's Jeri," Henry said, "Her dad and step mom, they're getting a divorce."
Rika stared speechless and looked over the boys. Then she found her voice, "No! I don't believe it!"
"It's true," Takato said, "Jeri told me last week."
"She never said anything to us!" Rika cried, "We didn't even know they were having problems."
"They'll have the divorce hearing this Friday," Takato said, "That is why she can't come to the dance."
"Where is she?"
"I'm not sure. She probably knows we'll be waiting for her so she didn't come."
"Poor Jeri," Rika frowned. "I bet she doesn't want to talk to us anymore."
"So, did you guys talk to her?" Takato asked Kenta and Henry.
"I gave her a hug, told her I was sorry and asked if there was anything I could do," Kenta stated.
"And?"
"She totally turned me down," Kenta mumbled.
"What about you, Henry?"
"She said there was something I could do," Henry said. "She asked me to stay close to my family."
"I have her next period," Rika stated, "foods. I'll talk to her then. I know exactly how she feels."
"Jeri's upset, but we're her friends," Takato told them, "we've got to make sure she knows we're here, or she'll always be alone."
*****
The foods class was learning how to teriyaki chicken and Rika was lab partners with Jeri. It would be easy to talk to her.
"The guys told me about your parents," Rika said, drying her hands and preparing the uncooked chicken. "I'm sorry, Jeri. I know exactly how you feel. My parents are divorced too."
"Yeah, but you didn't lose your mother when you were a kid," Jeri said, washing her hands.
"I know," Rika said, cutting the chicken into strips, "oh, I hate cooking--but about the divorce thing--it's tough."
"Oh, I know what you're going to say, Rika," Jeri muttered, "so save your breath. There's nothing you can do. Your parents may be divorced, but you know your dad is still alive. Your mom and grandma live with you. My mom died and my life changed forever. I promised myself when my dad remarried that I wouldn't let my stop mom take my real mother's place, so I avoided her when I could and kept her from entering my life. But before my parents were having problems, I got used to her and just as we were becoming close…they arranged for a divorce. Now I'll lose a second mother and my half brother. That is what I get for not getting close to her. My mom was sick, I should've done something and my step mother tried to be good for me but I wouldn't let her in my life so now I four people out of my life! You don't know how lucky you are to still have your birthmother with you. Yeah, she's busy and she's a supermodel, but that's a tough job to handle if you got a child."
Rika stared, 'she's turning into me. I can't let her become cold like I did.'
"How dare you say you know how I feel, Rika," Jeri muttered, making the teriyaki sauce and rice. "You don't know the half of it!"
"But, Jeri--"
"Shove it, okay?" Jeri snapped, "let's just make this. The chicken isn't going to cook itself."
Rika sighed. She couldn't believe the way Jeri was becoming. She feared that she'd never be the same again and there was nothing she could do.
'I feel so helpless,' Rika thought, putting the chicken strips into a frying pan, 'I can't let Jeri become me, but I don't think I can stop her.'
They cooked the teriyaki chicken and then they ate their meal. It wasn't smart to have foods right after lunch because everyone had already eaten. Rika glanced at Jeri and noticed that she was eating quite well.
"You skipped lunch, didn't you?" Rika questioned.
"I had things to do," Jeri retorted, "besides, I figured I'd just eat in foods since it's after lunch anyway."
"Things, huh? Were those things called 'avoiding your friends?' Rika demanded. Jeri's new attitude wasn't helping Rika stay calm and comforting and it made her anger rise. If Jeri was going to be cold, she'd have to be cold and firm right back to get her point across. Trying to be caring and soft did not help. "Let's just get one thing straight, Jeri. I went through the same thing you did. Yes, I didn't lose my real mother and my digimon partner, but my parents are divorced so I can relate to that. When my parents divorced and my mom focused on her career more than me, I became very hard and cold, just like you're becoming now. Sure, it's natural to push people away from you after something like this, but if you continue being like that, you'll have no one. I'm trying to help you here. I'm telling you I understand how you feel. Takato and the others are worried about you. We are your friends and we want to help you but we can't do that unless you let us. Don't become like me, Jeri. You're too nice of a person and if you become so cold and unforgiving like I did, you might not be able to change back. I still have a hard time myself."
"Oh, spare me, Rika," Jeri rolled her eyes, "I have enough problems of my own to hear you ramble on about yours!"
"I wasn't talking about my problems, Jeri," Rika corrected, "I was talking about the ones you're going to have unless you stop pushing people away! You still have others that care for you, so don't you forget it!"
"I know that," Jeri said, "That's why it's better that you all stay out of it. I can take care of myself. You are all busy enough already."
"Too busy to help our friends?" Rika demanded, "get real!"
"If you really wanna help, Rika," Jeri lowered her voice and sighed, "just leave me alone, okay? It's best that you don't get involved. Stay close to your mother and grandmother, while you still can. Try and contact your father. Send him a letter with your picture. I know you still think of him. Please, Rika, just leave me alone. You're going with Henry to the dance, right?"
"Yes, but maybe it wouldn't be right that we go." Rika said, "I mean, that's the day of your hearing and--"
"Go with Henry," Jeri insisted, "you two go and have a fun time. I can't go to the dance with Takato and have fun, so you and Henry will have to do it for us. Make sure Takato gets a date. I think my friend Nikki is available."
"I don't think Takato wants to go with anyone else, Jeri," Rika said, "you're the only girl he wants I the whole school, the whole city even."
"Well, he can't have me. I'll just bring him down." Jeri stood up, "let's clean this up before the bell rings."
They washed the dishes in silence and put their aprons away. The bell rang for the next and final class and Jeri left before Rika can get another word in.
'I just hope she'll think of what I said, Rika thought, stepping out of the door and nearly colliding into Kazu, "Wha--Kazu! Why don't you watch where you're going?"
"Welll, exuuuuze me!" Kazu muttered.
"Don't you have your next class with Jeri?"
"Yeah, I was just going to ask someone to the dance, so wanna go?"
"Oh, please, Kazu, I'm going with Henry!"
"I was kidding," Kazu said, "geez, can't you take a joke? I'm taking Nikki."
"I couldn't get through to Jeri," Rika groaned, "so I guess it's up to you. I hope you don't make her more mad than she already is."
"Oh, you break my heart," Kazu groaned, "You underestimate me. I'm the funny guy of the group. I'll just have to say one joke to Jeri and that ought to put a smile on her face!" Kazu walked past her and on to study hall. He saw Jeri sitting alone in a corner by a table and Kazu grabbed a chair, turned it around and propped his on the back. "Hey, Jeri, what's up?"
Jeri rolled her eyes, "oh no…this is all I need right now, more people trying to get on my case."
"That's right, Jeri, it is," Kazu said, "you've been through an awful lot, first with losing your mother, your digimon partner, being cloned by the D-Reaper and now your step mom and dad are splitting up. Of course this is what you need."
"I was being sarcastic, Kazu."
"Well, for the first time in like…well, a while, I'm not." Kazu said, leaning forward. "I'm your friend, Jeri and I'm here for you."
"If only I had a nickel for every time I heard that." Jeri moaned, "I’m glad Ryo's not in any of my classes."
"He may not, but you just might be getting a visit from him too. What, are we supposed to turn our backs on our friends when they have a problem?"
Jeri didn't reply.
"Say, since you can't come to the dance, how about we have a party Saturday?"
"No."
"Well, you're such a sore sport," Kazu frowned.
"Kazu, don't you have some homework to do?" Jeri asked, opening her math book, which he closed.
"I’m doing it," Kazu said, "My homework is talking to my friend. Right now, you're more important than my grades."
"You're starting to sound like Takato," Jeri grumbled.
"Well, good, maybe you'll listen to me."
"Kazu…why do you have to be so…"
"Good looking?" he asked hopefully, winking at her.
Jeri scowled.
"Darn…you're supposed to smile!" Kazu groaned, "but I swear by the end of class, I'll get a smile out of you."
"Kazu, I've heard all your jokes," Jeri muttered.
The tardy bell rang and the last remaining students walked in. Kazu continued to talk. "So, Kenta says you've left the journalism club. It got boring for you at just one meeting?"
"That's not what happened," Jeri mumbled.
"Oh, that's not it? Then how come?"
"Mind your own business, okay?" Jeri demanded.
"Seriously, Jeri, I'm sure you love journalism," Kazu said. "Why did you quit? Is it because you have to work more at your restaurant now?"
"Yes, Kazu, that's why!"
"Oh, is it? Or you want to stay away from your friends as much as possible?"
Jeri didn't answer.
"I knew it. You can't hide from us, Jeri. We're a team. We all came for you when you were stuck inside the D-Reaper's brain and we're still here for you now. We're not just a swarm of flies you swat away."
Jeri just sat in her chair and looked forward. She didn’t want to look at Kazu but she could hear him. Kazu went on talking. He didn't have to make her look at him, just so she heard him.
"If I said anything in the past that made you mad, I'm sorry," he said, "I was--"
"A jerk? Well you still are, Kazu."
"That's not what I was going to say," Kazu took her hand, which she tried to pull away. "I wanted to be a tamer. I thought I was the best at the card game. For a while, I thought that's all it was. I still did even when Gardmon became my partner. I always bragged about being the world's best tamer and when I found Gardmon, I was so psyched. I was cocky and I shouldn't have been. I knew that it wasn't just a game when Leomon died. I found out it was real. The digital world was real. The digimon was real. The terror was real. It was like a major culture shock."
"Well, I hope you've learned your lesson, Mr. I'd-do-anything-to-become-a-tamer!"
"I did," Kazu said.
Jeri sighed, "I shouldn't have become a tamer."
"Don’t say that."
"I wasn't strong enough, Kazu," Jeri insisted.
"What are you talking about?" Kazu demanded. "You had more cards than I've ever seen in my life! Rika--the digimon queen--showed you how to play the game! Leomon was your partner and you took care of that--that digimon with the many snakeheads by yourself. You used the Lady Devimon card on Leomon--man, that was great work!"
"Really?" Jeri asked, smiling a bit.
"Ah-ha! I see a smile!" Kazu cried. People turned around and hushed him to be quiet.
"But…I wasn't strong enough to save Leomon," she said.
"No one was," Kazu told her. "I talked so much about being a tamer and when I became one, I was still talk and no action!"
"He was my partner," Jeri mumbled. "I should've done something."
"Quit blaming yourself," Kazu ordered, "that won't help."
"But it's my fault," Jeri insisted.
"Your fault? Beezlemon was the one who killed him! You shouldn't feel so sorry for yourself. We could've done something to save Leomon but everything happened too fast."
"Kazu, I can't talk about this anymore," Jeri said, tightening her hands on the brim of her notebook. "Please, just stop."
"Jeri, you've been holding all this pain inside," Kazu said, "you can't hold it in anymore. Just talk me and you'll feel better."
"Yes I can." She said firmly. "If you'd stop talking."
"Well, I'm not going to stop." Kazu said. "Class isn't over yet and we've got plenty of time to talk. You're not leaving until you say everything that's--"
"Kazu, what's left to talk about?" she demanded, whipping her head to him. "You already know what happened. You know the deal! You know my mother died when I was just a little kid and Leomon left me--twice--first by just deserting me before I got a chance to be a tamer and again by death. You know I became possessed by the D-Reaper and I brought the chaos to our world. It was all my fault, okay? Now my parents are splitting up and you want me to just talk to you about it? You think that'd make me feel any better?"
"You're getting mad now," Kazu said, "that's good, just let it out, Jeri."
"I can't let it out Kazu!" she shouted in a whisper. "I can't!"
"Why, because you're afraid of losing more people?"
"Yes, why you think?"
"If you're mad, Jeri, then get mad," Kazu insisted. "Don't hide your true feelings. Just let it out."
"Not now," she mumbled, "not here."
"Not when you're so close."
"Kazu, just stop!"
"I'm not going to stop."
"Why?"
"Why do you think, babe?" Kazu demanded, "You're my friend, that's why!"
Jeri sighed. "I know what you're trying to do, but it's not working."
"We're worried about you. Especially Takato, you should've seen the guy earlier. He asked us all to talk to you."
"I can't talk about this anymore."
"Anytime is a good time to unload. It's not good that you keep this all bottled up inside. Just keep talking to me. I'm all ears and we've still got time."
Jeri looked up at the clock, 'when will this class be over? Is Kazu ever going to shut up? I can't listen to this, no matter how good it sounds.'
"I know you don't wanna hear this, but it's what you need to hear." Kazu stressed, "Yes, you've made a mistake, we've all made mistakes. But, Jeri, you were a good tamer, better than me."
"Stop it, Kazu!" Jeri whispered.
"No, class ain't over yet," he insisted.
"You keep telling me lies. I was a poor tamer, not even so-so!"
"You're the one who's lying," Kazu told her, "you were great. Beating yourself up is not going to help. Let this pain leave you. Get angry, I bet you wanna hit something."
"No I don't."
"You can hit me if you want to."
"No."
"What, you think this will all go away if you keep this all bottled up inside?" Kazu demanded. "Come on, Jeri."
Jeri didn't answer. She wasn't sure how. She knew Kazu was right but she couldn't talk. Talking never did anything. At a loss for words, she folded her arms and put them on her table followed by her head. As she let out a sigh, she felt Kazu rub her back and pat her head softly. She sighed again. It felt good to be comforted and touched, but this was something that just wouldn't go away.
"You've got friends, Jeri," Kazu said, "people who love you. If you'd only see that."
"Oh, Kazu," Jeri whispered, "Why are you so--"
The bell rang, cutting hr sentence short. She shook her head and sat up. "I gotta go, Kazu." She stood and Kazu stood up in front of her.
"You can't leave yet." He said.
"Class is over now, Kazu," she muttered, "and we've talked. There's nothing else to say."
"The hell there isn't!" he yelled, "Jeri, you've been faking to be happy for the last couple of weeks. But I bet you were faking your happiness longer, haven't you? It's okay to be sad, Jeri. Don't cover all this with a smile, it won't work on me."
"Kazu, cut it out!'"
Kazu grabbed her arm, "Jeri, come on. I know how you're feeling. Just talk to me, I'll listen."
"Fine, listen to this!" she hissed, "I hate how you always bragged about being the best tamer! It's more than just a card game, Kazu! It's not all about fighting either. It's about a bond that you share with your partner. You idiot, why didn't you do anything when Leomon got hurt? You've even practiced your card swipe for heaven sakes! You make me sick the way you think the digital world is just an imaginary place for a vacation! Why didn’t you make Gardmon do something? Why did Leomon have to be the one to die? If Gardmon was in Leomon's place, would you have done something?" By this point, she was breathing hard and Kazu stood stiff for a moment and then in he smiled.
"If you want to blame someone else, go ahead Jeri." He said, "Yeah, I should've done something. We all could so you don't have to take all the blame yourself. I was a tamer too. That's great, Jeri, keep blaming me if it'll make you feel better. Go ahead and hit me, come on. I deserve it."
"No."
"You slapped my hand when I tried to pull you away in the digital world," Kazu reminded, "just hit me. Let the fire out! Come on!"
"Kazu…" her eye started to twitch in anger and her hand was stiff.
"I can take it, Jeri. Slap me."
"Shut up!" Jeri lifted her hand and slapped him hard across the face.
Kazu stumbled to the side and nearly fell to the floor. He put his hand to his burning cheek. "Whoa, you hit pretty hard. How do you feel now? I bet you feel pretty good now, huh?"
Jeri stared, "Oh my gosh…Kazu, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to, I uh--just--"
"Been stressed lately? That's okay."
"It's not that, oh, are you all right?" she asked. "Oh, I'm a terrible person, now you might disappear too!" Jeri ran away in tears.
"Jeri, really, I'm okay!" Kazu yelled after her, "man, why did I tell her to hit me?" he groaned and stepped out of class. When he got to his locker, Ryo walked up to him.
"What happened to you?" he asked.
"Jeri slapped me." He answered.
"She what? Why?"
"Because I told her too," Kazu shrugged.
"You moron!"
"Hey, I thought it would make her feel better to hit someone." Kazu said, "it helps some people to hit something when they're so stressed. But I think I may have done more harm than good."
"I'll go talk to her," Ryo said and walked away.
"Just do not tell her to hit you!" Kazu warned, "Jeri may be a small girl, but she can hit pretty hard!"
Takato walked to Kazu's locker, "I just talked to Rika and she said nothing worked. How about you?"
"Well, I almost got Jeri to open up," Kazu said, "but got a slap in the face instead."
"What?" Takato demanded. "What did you do to her, Kazu?"
"Nothing. I just…told her to hit me because I thought it'd make her feel better." He groaned holding his cheek, "but now I know it wasn't such a good idea. Talking didn't seem to help so maybe if she hit me then it would take all her anger and pain out."
"Now you probably made it worse, nice work, Kazu!" Takato groaned.
"Hey, I talked to her all period long," Kazu said, "and I almost got her to open up. She's very angry and confused, Takato. Someone's got to get her to open up and I think it should be you."
"I can't."
"Why not? You're closer with her than any of us."
"I've tried and failed," Takato sighed. "She pushed me away too."
"Well, try again and if she keeps pushing you away, keep coming back. She wants us all to leave her alone but we can't."
Takato sighed, "I think I'll let her alone for a while. She had to drudge up all her feelings to all of us in one day and I don't think she can do it anymore."
"Well, you'd better do something, Chumly," Kazu said. "Because if we all just leave her alone, then she'll have no one. We're all she's got left, don't you get it? We can't leave her alone, especially not now when she needs us the most."
Takato sighed, "Yeah, sure."
"Well, I'm going to go put some ice on my cheek." Kazu told him with a wince, "you just think of what I said." Kazu walked off and Takato looked at his feet. He was right, but he didn't want Jeri to push him away again.
*****
Jeri felt someone's hand fall on her shoulder as she turned the corner. She didn't hear the footsteps behind her. She gasped and turned around. "Ryo--oh no…"
"Just don't hit me like you did to Kazu, okay?" Ryo asked.
"I didn't mean to hit him."
"Look, I know I'm not as close with you as the others," Ryo said. "But I did help save you from the D-Reaper."
"Yeah, thanks."
"I just want to say I'm sorry about all the people you lost in your life. It must be hard. I wish I taught you how to be a real tamer. I've been in the digital world longer than you guys and I was experienced. I'm sorry for not doing that."
"Hey, don't start now," Jeri mumbled.
"But for what it's worth, you were a great tamer. I don't know what I'd do if Cybermon was killed. He was all I had when I was alone in the digital world. You're stronger than all of us."
"I am not," Jeri groaned.
"Hey, if you ever wanna talk, don't hesitate, okay?" Ryo asked.
"Yeah," Jeri said, pulling on her backpack, "thanks. Listen, I gotta go." Without saying another word, or listening to another of Ryo's, Jeri continued home.
Ryo looked down and sighed. Jeri's friends were all she had left and she was pushing them away. They were all feeling the same way: helpless.
TBC
