Murder Machine
After yet another near-death experience Vash, Meryl, and Milly have hopped a bus and are headed to May City. Along the way, Vash spots a tiny speck on the horizon of the sand dunes. It's Nicholas D. Wolfwood, a priest with a past... and a Portable Confessional. When things go haywire and a child gets lost in the desert, the two men race against time to save her... coming in close quarters to "Old Relics" of the past. In other words... big, rusty robots with lasers.
Bus Driver: That is one heck of a well-prepared dead guy. *pokes Nick* Hey, you.
Nick: *looks up* Ha... ahem... well. Praise the Lord! Hello!
Bus Driver: Did he die of heat stroke? *pokes Nick* Hey!
Nick: *looks up* I'm saved!
Nick: Old man, Can you count it one more time?
Bus Driver: Okay, listen carefully! 10, 20, 30, 40... 50, 60, 70, 80. There's not enough no matter how I count. I told you the fare is $$100.
Nick: I've taken out all the money I have. Please give me a small discount, Mr. Bus Driver.
Bus Driver: *sighs* Ok, I'll charge you $$80.
Nick: Really?! That's great! Thank you! That's right! *puts a box on the driver's head*
Bus Driver: What is this?!
Nick: It's a confession box. You've seen one before? It's a small booth within a church. This is the portable version! I'm sure you have something to confess to. Maybe you got lost or you drove into a tree. Why don't you tell me?
Bus Driver: *hands it back* I don't need it. *walks off*
Nick: Could it be that he has never sinned?
Bus Driver: *with confessional on his head* Whoa! What the hell is this?!
Nick: It's a confessional. Ya know, those private rooms they used to have in the churches back home. This one is portable! You much have /something/ to confess. Some blasphemous act of indiscretion, maybe? It's on the house.
Vash: What?
Nick: So, you can have this kind of a smile, too.
Vash: Eh, what do you mean?
Nick: I was worried. Although you've been laughing all the while, but there was no real feeling within the laughter. Although you're hurting inside, you bear it all quietly and laugh. That is how I see you. To heal your pain, you need... the confession box!! You can confess anything and everything! All you have to do is put money in here.
Vash: *facepalms* You're really a good business man.
Nick: We need to use our brains to survive!
Nick: Well, I'll be. I'm actually surprised that you can smile like that.
Vash: Huh? What do you mean?
Nick: You had me kinda worried. I noticed, you always smiled, it seemed really friendly... but the way you smiled was so empty, hurt to watch you. You're hurting like crazy on the inside, yet you grin and bear it. At least that's this man's opinion anyway.
Milly: Gee, it must've been awfully tiring to walk carrying that huge thing on your back.
Nick: Heh heh. I couldn't leave it behind. I do have my pride as a tradesman, you know?
Meryl: A... tradesman?
Nick: I'm a man of the cloth.
Meryl: You? Are you serious?
Milly: *giggles* Do you, like, make pretty dresses?
Nick: Hardly! I'm a priest. Saving the lambs who have strayed off their path. The soldier of love...
Nick: Heh heh. Well, my bike decided to break down on me about 100 iles (miles) or so down the road from here, so I thought I'd just hoof it.
Meryl: Are you saying you actually /walked/ 100 iles?
Nick: That's right! It was pretty horrible.
Nick: Hey, I'm alive because of what you did. How can I ever thank you?
Nick: I'm Wolfwood! At your service.
Nick: Okay, well this.. is yours. And this one... is yours. And then this one... uh... is mine. Sorry it's not much, but you think it'll be enough for now?
Nick: If I shot ya dead right now and collect the 60 billion double dollars, I'd have a really fun journey, wouldn't I? *laughs*
Vash: You weren't listening, were you?
Nick: *abruptly stops* Got anymore water?
Vash: I would, but you drank it all.
Nick: *flicks Vash in the nose* Yeah, sorry 'bout that.
Vash: *tries to laugh it off*
Nick: *joins in laughing*
Milly: Hey, they seem to be getting along really well.
Both: *laugh hysterically*
Meryl: Birds of a feather have flocked together.
Nick: *drinking water* Aaaah..... Aaah! I'm alive again! I'm much obliged.
