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Bucket O Rei Script version 1.3
by Evan Denion and Matthew Benson
ANNOUNCER(to be further noted as ANN)
Are you tired of Japanese and German mecha pilots breaking down at critical moments?
*Asuka curls up into a ball and starts muttering random german*
Are you the director of a clandestine military organization and miss a deceased loved one? Do you need a reliable servent that won't talk back?
Mad Scientist(MS)
Yes!But how?
ANN
Well now you can with Bucket O' Rei!
Yes that's right,Bucker O'Rei!
*Rei steps out*
With this revolutionary appliance you'll never have to hire a hooker again!
MS
Well how does it work?
ANN
Well,all you need is 10$ and a phone!For 10$ you can get the introductory
deal of 1 Bucket,LCL,Rei molds,and the best part is...if one breaks you just make another!
Lets hear from a satisfied user
Husband
*puts arm around Rei*
The Bucket O Rei was reccomended to me by a close friend Gendo Ikari and I must say.
It is the best 10$ i ever spent
*Wife walks in*
Wife
*gasp*You..You bought a Bucket O' Rei and didn't tell me!?
Husband
I'm sorry honey,you can use the Bucket next
Wife
Yay!*hugs*
Husband
Thanks,Bucket O' Rei!
ANN
O but that isn't all!
MS
It's not!?
ANN
Oh no,If you call RIGHT NOW you can get the Asuka mold for FREE!Thats right!FREE!
*Asuka walks out*
Asuka
(monotone)So please go to your phones and call 1-800-BUCK-ETR please
ANN
Excessive groping in proximity to giant mother beings can result in loss of limbs.We will not be held liable for any injury that may occur in usage of Bucket O Rei or Asuka.Bucket O' Rei is not intended for those under 4 as it contains small parts which may be choking hazards.Incase of world destruction via Third Impact,please stop use of Bucket O' Rei immediatly.Please use Bucket O' Rei with caution and enjoy your product.
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