So that's it, isn't it? Haruko's gone, and the only thing she left behind was her guitar and a giant mess. I remember the field full of cats as my fingernails bled half-dried blood on the Vespa handlebars.
I told her I loved her.
It was a long time before I mastered that thing. I remember the first time I got it up into the air. But I couldn't keep the speed up, and my altitude dropped to a crashing halt. It hurt….. it hurt so damn much…
Oh Haruko!
Leave it up to my dad to be the first one to bug me about it. I woke up in the middle of the night, feeling sick to my stomach. As I trudged down the hall to the bathroom, the reek of alcohol polluted the air like the smell of piss in an alleyway. As usual, dad and grandpa were laughing, but their laughter cooled down at the sound of footsteps. I almost stepped on the cat entering the bathroom. Dude, that cat's got balls as big as those tanuki statues you see in restaurant windows.
In my half-asleep state, the darkness of the bathroom seemed an endless dark blur, with only the dusty nightlight guiding me to the target. Would've been nice if I actually had peed myself during the night; it sure as hell would've been easier to deal with than this. My dad's head sleazed its way around the doorframe, peeking in like a hungry snake.
"Oh, Naota-kun… what were you dreaming about?"
I'll be damned if I know what I ate yesterday. When I pulled my sweat pants back up, I keeled over, as though I had just been slugged by Haruko in the stomach.
Cold… wet and cold… what the hell…?
Dad thought it was the funniest thing on the face of the earth. My hand covered my mouth as I ran back to my room. I would rather puke there than where Dad and Grandpa could see me. The window in my room never flew open so fast. But nothing came out, not a drop. I sank to my knees, panting, begging for mercy from whatever demon was causing this unholy hell. Sweat blurred my sight, but I wish to every god in existence I had just passed out there on the floor and gone back to sleep. What an idiot… I wiped the sweat away.
The fucking guitar was sitting there in the corner.
You bitch… you crazy Vespa bitch… You're the reason that Dad is laughing his ass off. I can't believe what just happened…
The next night, I thought about Haruko again. The guitar just sat there in its usual corner like always, but tonight it just seemed like it was staring at me. I watched it, struggling not to blink, lest that alien woman suddenly come out of nowhere and bring it crashing down on my already throbbing head. It was cold, and I snuggled down deeper into my bed covers. Cold, like that incident last night…
I remembered being eaten by Kanti, that erratic darkness engulfing me like hot water in the bathtub. But it wasn't warm at all; it was fake. It was like thousands of needles and wires attached to every inch of my body that strained with the slightest movement.
But there was no pain to be felt here.
Why the hell am I so cold? I can't sleep on my side tonight, it's just not working. The door to my room opens, then shuts without incident. As much of a prick as my dad is, he's not one to pass up checking on me in my sleep once in a while. At least he's got ONE descent bone in his perverted body.
I'm dreaming of warmth, of sweet warm nothing in the dark. When did the cat come in and lay down on my stomach? Stupid fat thing… oh well, at least I don't feel cold anymore.
In fact, I feel quite warm now, like I'm being hugged in my sleep. Cat must've sprawled out. I remember something like this from a good while ago. Haruko led me upstairs to my room… or was it that odd hotel room? I can't remember. She told me to go up there, and when I went in, Ninamori and Mamimi were laying there on my bed… with enough space between them to let me lay down. I ran to the bathroom.
Then, there was another time where I woke up feeling warm, covered in warm, like there was something pushing the covers down on me. My arms were entangled and my legs couldn't move. When I opened my eyes, Haruko was sleeping next to me in bed.
I told her I loved her. Crazy Vespa bitch.
My dreaming melted into darkness. There was a shift in the blankets not by me, and a warm feeling trailing down my stomach. Something wasn't right; the cat doesn't do this kinda thing to me. I didn't smell the mangy thing's fur in my face, and the only reason I didn't want to open my eyes was because I didn't want that thing's balls in my face, as had happened on several occasions.
I thought about Haruko, and suddenly that wild, untamed scent of her stung in my nose. It was warm on my lower belly-no, lower than that… What the hell is this feeling…?
I finally got myself into space on that Vespa, I remembered, but Haruko was the one to find me first. She said she was surprised that a kid like me could actually somewhat catch up to her. Atomsk was nowhere to be found, so she had just kinda dragged herself around the earth, looking for bad boys to swat with her replacement guitar. The original sat silent for ages in its corner of my room. I had always assumed that it was some kind of gift from Haruko, or that I just kept it around to remind myself that the crazy alien woman really had existed. She had hugged me and shared her sleeping bag with me on those road trips ages ago, pressing my weary, bandaged head against her chest.
It was affection, it was greed. She used me to get to Atomsk, but I didn't care. When she slapped me around, I wanted her gone. When she disappeared, I wanted her to come back.
It feels like she's sleeping with me again, with those leather riding gloves of hers flexing on my skin. This warm feeling is making me squirm… feels… kinda good… too good… No… it can't be her, she can't be here…Oh my God…!
I bolted up in bed, the sweat droplets flying from my eyebrows. The covers were bunched up in a thick pile on my chest and belly. And there she was… that crazy, alien Vespa woman that I loved and hated all at once. I'd recognize that vicious pink mop of hair anyplace, and her face was hidden by it between my legs. That warm feeling burned hot, feeling way too good to be normal. My breath came in short pants… what the hell is she doing… to… me…
HARUKOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I didn't care who heard me then and there. All I could do was lie there, panting, my vision blurring electric static white. When I could see again, she was there, peering up at me with those demonic amber eyes of hers. She grinned broadly, and I could see her pointed teeth like the fangs of a hungry animal.
Angel. Devil. Lover. Bitch.
I passed out.
"Goodnight, Takkun…"
~~~~~~~~
