Cold Hearted
By: Spike (sgnichol@tassie.net.au)

Midnight had fallen over Tokyo 3. The lights of the city penetrated the darkness of the night and gave birth to the Tokyo 3's nightlife. People, cars and noise were out in force, all engaged in their nightly activities. All thoughts of the recent blackout were soon forgotten. Perhaps it was indeed fitting that people retreated to the refuge of their artificial lighting once the blackout had passed.

Elsewhere, on a hill over looking the metropolis, three figures relaxed. Two, were laying back, stargazing while the other was sitting up. The lights of Tokyo 3 had returned for a long time now and silence hung between the trio, each lost in their own thoughts.

Rei blinked. She had seen the lights of Tokyo 3 many times from her apartment window. But she never liked them. She often regarded them as a sign of danger. Just like the Eva's. Just like Commander Ikari.....

Rei, suddenly felt a chill. She shivered. She never really liked any feelings of cold.

Why? What is this chill? Why must she feel it? She knew there was a chill from the LCL whenever she ejected from the entry plug but this was different. She knew she felt cold in the presence of Commander Ikari, she knew she felt cold in her crummy apartment, she knew she felt cold when night descended.....

The cold was too much. She drew her legs closer to her body. Warmth. She must find warmth. Warmth. Fire. A destroyer but useful when tamed properly. Fire. Commander Ikari. Fire. Hatred. Pain.

For Asuka however, the silence was too much. Her eyes drifted away from the stars and grew irritated. Shinji had fallen silent, lost in his stargazing. Rei, still as introverted as ever, shivered and drew her legs in closer . Asuka sighed in annoyance.

Why do I bother hanging around these two? She wondered. Sure, they're fellow Eva pilots but they could be more talkative!

The silence continued. But to Asuka the silence was so deafening. So deafening that she couldn't take it any more. Growling with frustration, she got to her feet strode off. Shinji shifted his head to see Asuka leave.

"Hey Asuka." Shinji called. "Where are you going?"

Asuka flicked her head around. Shinji blinked as he saw Asuka's eyes burning with fury.

"Baka Shinji! I'm going back to Misato's place! Maybe I'll find a descent conversation there!!"

And with that, she turned around and continued on her way, her muttering of baka audible.

Shinji sighed and returned to his stargazing. But, it didn't take him long before his gaze finally focused on Rei. She seemed tense, edgy. As if she was preoccupied with her own inner demons.

I should do something. Shinji thought. She looks so uneasy. I must do something. She looks like she needs someone.

But I....

I.....

Shinji paused as his hesitation ran riot. As the pause grew longer and longer, Shinji then moved into action. In spite of his hesitation, he sat up and shifted a few inches closer to Rei. Then he lay back down on the grass. He rewarded himself with a smirk for his achievement. It was a small one but an achievement nonetheless.

Rei hadn't noticed Shinji had moved. The chill still wouldn't go away. She drew tighter and tighter into her ball-shaped form.

Why do I feel cold?

Why won't this feeling go away?

Just then Rei's thoughts were interrupted by a sudden cough. She slowly turned her head.

"Ikari"

Shinji smiled bravely - but to no avail as Rei didn't change her morose expression. Shinji then turned his attention to the heavens above.

"What are you looking at Ikari?" asked Rei.

"All those stars up there." Shinji answered.

"Why?"

"I've always liked looking at stars."

"I see"

"You know" Shinji went on. "When I look up like this I feel small, like there's no one else on this earth."

Rei fell silent. Small. Like there's no one else. She would know all about that. She was all too aware that she was neglected and overlooked by the other people in Tokyo 3. She was a pale lurker of the shadows, a ghost, often viewed as cold. Ironic how she was fighting the same thing she was being viewed as......

Rei followed Shinji's gaze up towards the stars. Stars. She'd always favoured the natural light of stars over the artificial lights of Tokyo 3. The man-made lights were cold. The stars felt strangely ... ...warm......

Stars. Gigantic balls of hydrogen burning light years away. Burning. Warmth.

Rei closed her eyes. She must banish this horrible feeling of being cold..... She must...... somehow.......At any cost........

Rei buried her head in her knees and drew her legs in even closer.

This cold feeling.....must be..... banished........

Rei could feel her body toppling over. She didn't care. She will fight her battle alone....

Just then, much to Shinji's surprise, Rei's balled up form toppled over in his direction. He was even more astonished when her head landed right on his chest.

Rei, didn't notice. She must continue to fight. She must win....

Shinji meanwhile, just stared in disbelief. He knew he should've done something but he wasn't expecting to have things done for him - like he was used to.....

Do something A voice in Shinji's mind said.

What? Shinji mentally replied.

Shouldn't you be doing something at a time like this?

But...

Oh come on. You're starved of affection right?

Yes but....

Look, you'll never get any affection if you don't give any in return.

But....

Are you going to seize this opportunity or not?

Slowly, Shinji reached his hand up and gently stroked Rei's hair.

Rei still had her eyes closed. But she couldn't stop a sudden burst of warmth brush up against her cheek. And then there came the hand. A hand that ran it's fingers through her hair in a tender manner. Whose hand is doing this? Who could be this affectionate? Who else could it be.......?

Rei slowly opened her eyes. Her head shifted until her gaze met with one of another.

"Ikari" she whispered.

Shinji smiled. He felt slightly embarrassed being this tender but it felt so good, So right.

Rei sighed in satisfaction. She no longer felt cold. She had found the warmth she sought after. She was sharing the same warmth with Ikari. Her cold feelings were no more. Ikari had banished her cold feelings. And, judging by his actions, he was someone who really cared for her.....

Rei released her legs and lay them alongside Shinji. Then she lay her hands on his chest. She felt safe and so free.....

Then she did a very rare thing: she smiled. At Shinji. Just for him. Like when they defeated Ramiel together. Then she closed her eyes and nestled her head deeper into Shinji's chest. Shinji then ceased his stroking and put his arms around Rei as to enclose the embrace. And there they remained.