Andrew Huang, nutcase, headcase, briefcase, member begun September 1, 1997 restarted Sometime In March, 1998 Reminder: There _are_ spoilers in here. Big time. There is an especially blatant revelation of one of the secrets behind the nature of the Evangelions. Evangelion is the property of Gainax (great bunch of people, they are). ADV Films has the rights to the English translation. Still more of the thing called Neon Genesis Evanjellydonut. Do please read the previous three parts first, before reading this part. Note that this is an interlude piece, much shorter, and released to make you all a bit happier. Nothing much happens, I just need to establish a few things before the next full part. --------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------- A frazzled writer sat down at his computer. "I know. This is late. Very late. Several months in the writing. Shut up already. I'm going, I'm going!" Type, type, type, type.... ************************************************ Ikari Gendou's mind rose through the layers of blessed unconsciousness and emerged into wakefulness. He lay there quiescently, contemplating the ceiling above him. It was slightly blurry, as he did not have his glasses on. Presently, a face loomed over him. An accompanying voice spoke. Ibuki Maia's voice. "You really must teach me how you do that, sir." Gendou blinked. "Ah...do what?" "Take a fall like that. I mean, when Rei grabbed you by the arm and just tossed you--I'm sure a human body usually doesn't make _that_ much noise from falling such a short distance. You had to have done something to amplify the crash sound." Gendou sighed. This was going to be one of _those_ days, was it? *** Neon Genesis Evanjellydonut Hole 3.5: Family Can Get on One's NERVs by Andrew Huang written for The Sound and the Furry Productions *** "Good morning, Asuka-chan!" Hikari's bright smile truly beamed. "'Morning, Asuka." Shinji came in with a vase and a pink carnation. "Misato wanted me to bring you this for her." "Guten mor...good morning." Asuka yawned and rubbed her eyes. "I want to get out of here. I'm all right, really I am...." She looked around. Cocking an eyebrow, she asked, "Just you two?" Hikari coughed. "Er...Touji-kun thought probably...and Rei...." Asuka sighed. "How considerate of them." Shinji set the flowers down by her bed. "Well, yeah. And...here!" Shinji waved a pair of video tapes around. "Hey! Don't go flashing those around this place! I have a reputation to keep, you know!" Asuka hastily snatched them out of his hand. "Um. Danke schoen." Shinji nodded, and grinned. Asuka scowled a little. "And here's the stuff that you've been missing in class." Hikari produced a bag and dumped it on the bed. The bed shook. "_What_ has Sensei been doing!?" "Stopped mumbling about the Second Impact and actually assigning work." Shinji's lip quirked. "I never thought I'd actually miss those lectures of his." "So, Asuka-chan, how's the food here?" "I'm beginning to think Misato is on the hospital kitchen's payroll." Everyone winced. "Ah. Well, 's there anything else you need?" Shinji seemed awfully solicitous today. "If you're trying to buy my favor, it won't work. But no, I'm fine. Thanks anyway." Asuka stifled a second yawn. Shinji nodded. "All right. Gotta go--I'm meeting up with Kensuke about something. Get well soon." He walked out the door. "Close the door, okay?" Hikari did so as she exited, giving a cheerful wave. "See you later!" Asuka sighed again, then pulled the cart with the TV and VCR towards herself. Turning on the machines and lowering the volume, she stuck one of the two tapes in. <*I am the beautiful sailor-suited warrior, Sailor Moon! And in the name of the Moon, I will punish you!* "Ahh...bliss." ------------------------------------------------ It was a wonder, her cute smile. It still made Shinji a little lightheaded. But that wasn't the important thing--for the moment. "Well, where's Kensuke?" "Are you kidding? He's not going to find out about the plan until it's too late. I mean, until he's participating." Her smile shifted, just slightly. Her eyes glinted a certain way. Her _teeth_ glinted, in that same way. "Are you sure about this? I mean, I know Aida, and I know how he--and I--feel about Asuka." Touji looked up from his cuddle session with Hikari. "And I know that Asuka-chan isn't too fond of him either. Touji-kun's right...." Hikari tried to pull him back down to the interrupted cuddle session. She would have succeeded, except-- "Two words," said Rei. "Training room." The three EVA pilots were silent. Hikari, who had only heard about the events of that day, still wasn't quite convinced. "Was it _really_ that bad?" "No, it was worse. I say we go with this." Shinji looked over to Rei. "You have a plan?" "Working out the later details, but yes, I have a plan. I've already started, too." Rei smiled, again. Shinji felt lightheaded, again. Kensuke, somewhere else, suddenly sneezed and felt very, very scared at the same time. That resulted in a rather large usage of tissues. ------------------------------------------------ "Maya," Ritsuko began, "today...." She stopped. "Sempai?" asked Maya. "There it is again," said the doctor. "What?" ------------------------------------------------ "Father." "Shinji." Ikari and son sat looking at each other, over the menus. It was a special day, today. Ikari Yui's birthday. She would have been 38. In honor of her memory, they were having lunch together. If it hadn't been for the graveside meeting a few months ago, this would have been even more uncomfortable. Of course, it is difficult to contemplate that level of discomfort, considering that _now_, Shinji's prime instinct was still to get up and quietly shuffle away. Then again, one must suppose that this was an improvement over wanting to run away aimlessly. Shuffling out of a restaurant is a bit more dignified than running out, and he certainly would have had a particular destination, ah-ha, in mind, had he given in to his instinct this time around. They kept on staring at each other, perhaps in the hopes that one of them would break down and actually start _talking_ about something, sooner or later. It must be remembered, though, that the phrases "normal family relationship" and "NERV affiliate" just don't quite fit in the same sentence without considerable suspension of disbelief. Or, perhaps, a negative modifier. Still, something had to give. "So...how are you and Rei doing?" It was a little forced, but a noble attempt, nonetheless. Shinji sighed slightly in relief. "We're getting along great, Father." No thanks to you. "She's got something planned for us tonight." Gendou nodded, and was silent for a while. "It is...good to hear that." ------------------------------------------------ <*--as it turned out, a small black piglet had gotten tangled up with the unmanned glider's landing mechanisms. I guess you could say that pigs have flown.*> Rei blinked, and frowned momentarily, while the newscaster laughed a bit at his bad joke, and moved on to another story. She then returned her attention to the computer terminal. ------------------------------------------------ The silence had come back, after the initial effort. Shinji felt that it was his turn. "Um...why did you decide to come here, anyway? I thought you liked sashimi more than Indian food." The fact that his son knew what sort of food he liked surprised Gendou a bit--almost as much as it surprised Shinji himself. "Um, well...it's a little hard to use chopsticks, when...." Gendou drummed his taped fingers on the table. He almost winced in pain. Shinji declined to comment on Rei's, er, handiwork, but did shake his head slightly. Gendou shrugged. "Well, I don't know about you, but I could murder a curry." They placed their orders, and briefly contemplated each other. "Tell me about Mother." This took Gendou off guard for a moment. "She was...full of life. So vibrant. She had greatness written all over her. I was so proud of her." As he spoke, his expression became positively wistful. "But more than that, I remember...when you came along, she put even more energy into raising you up...." And, of course, there was _before_ you were born.... "Father? You're drooling." Shinji felt slightly sick. Gendou blinked. "Ah. My...apologies." He sobered quickly. "She was a wonderful woman, scientist, and mother. Simply put." ------------------------------------------------ "Mari...." Touji pushed the door open, two floors above from where, on a TV screen, some rather overdeveloped adolescent females wearing rather underdeveloped sailor fukus were prodding some youma buttock. "Oniichan! And Oniichan's girlfriend!" Hikari blinked. Word, apparently, got around fast. A cute, 10 year old girl wearing a bright pink ribbon in her hair was sitting up in the hospital room's bed. There was a book on her lap. It was big. Touji laughed slightly nervously, just in the right way that irked Hikari a bit. "Ah, yes, Mari...this is Hikari-chan." "Hello, Mari-chan. The doctors say you're getting much better!" She didn't notice a sudden shift in the way that Mari's eyes shone. "I am doing very well, thank you. I am gratified by your concern," intoned Mari. Hikari would have facefaulted, if not for Touji's hand on her shoulder. Mari continued talking. "It becomes...tiresome to lie in here alone for so long." Mari suddenly shook her head a bit. "Oniichan's been telling me so much about you!" she burbled, gleefully. "And you cook great, too!" Hikari started edging towards the door, but again, Touji's hand restrained her from moving. Touji said, "Ah, yeah...isn't she great?" He gently elbowed his girlfriend to keep her from saying something off. ------------------------------------------------ "...and she really liked the color purple," said Gendou. "Purple?" asked Shinji. "Purple," said Gendou. "And green, too." "Green?" "Green." And Unit 01 was supposed to be white, and it _was_ white, until the day after the...accident. Stupid paint jobs never stayed on, either. I hate purple. Nearby, two Drazi started punching each others' lights out. However, no one cared. Drazi don't really exist in the EVA universe. ------------------------------------------------ "G'bye, Oniichan! G'bye, Hikari-neesan!" "I'll be back in a few days, Mari...." The two teenagers stepped out of the room. "Wh...what was with that...uh...." Touji shook his head. "Ever since I got her transferred over here, she's done that once in a while. It's strange.... And whenever EVA-03 comes up in conversation, it's like...." Touji frowned slightly. "Very weird." ------------------------------------------------ "My question is, how the HELL did anyone manage to tie a twenty-five meter pink ribbon around this thing?" "Shut up and help me get it off Unit 03." "Yeah, yeah. Heh, I think it would look better with a blue ribbon." "The last one _was_ blue." "There was another one?" ------------------------------------------------ Kensuke was sweating. It wasn't the "sweating because I'm a bit too warm" kind of sweating, or the "sweating because I'm sort of nervous" kind of sweating, but rather, the "sweating because I don't believe this you have got to be kidding me WHAT THE F--ah, hahahah no that can't be serious" kind of sweating. He took a good, long stare at the computer screen. [What did you just type?] he tapped out, slowly. Had he been speaking out loud, he would have drawled like a Texan in slow motion. [It's right there on the screen, above--] came the reply. [Date Asuka.] [Yes.] [The hell I will!] he now pounded out, starting to become incensed, while growling, "Who the hell is this nutcase, anyway?" He poised his fingers to resume typing, but was beaten to the punch. [It is not important who I am. Not to you.] [What's that supposed to mean?] returned Kensuke. Something at the back of his mind started to itch. [Exactly what I said.] [Dammit, you, I don't have the time for this.] [You will. Yes, you will.] The itch now started gnawing actively at his consciousness. [This is just something I don't need. Go away, whoever you are. Leave me fricking ALONE!] The keyboard shuddered under Kensuke's assault. [Very well. I will go away, for now. Be warned...be warned. Mweh. Heh. Heh.] [Yeah, whatever. Don't bother me agaiDisconnected. Hit ctrl-c to leave.] Grumbling, Kensuke exited UNIX talk. "I don't believe this. It's damn weird, that's what it...." That little thing bothering Kensuke finally seized his attention in a metaphorical headlock. "Wait. I never actually _typed_ to ask who that was, did I?" He gulped. And he gulped again. ------------------------------------------------ Rei took off her headphones, and smiled. Getting that bug into Kensuke's room had involved some trickiness with a harness, the portable motorized pulley she found in one of the NERV storerooms, quite a lot of wire, a lockpick, and this tight-fitting black bodysuit which she had, ah, borrowed, so as to make herself less visible in the night.... Ah, but it was worth it. Now, the fun could begin. She was going to make sure that Kensuke would do as he was told. Need to model the bodysuit for Shinji, too. Mweh. Heh. Heh. Shinji, a few blocks away, started nosebleeding into his lamb stew on saffroned rice. ------------------------------------------------ After doing her best to finish what had been questionably labeled "dinner" by the nurse, Asuka decided to pop in the second tape, having now finished the first one. "Hey--Shinji! You idiot! You gave me one of your Giant Robo tapes!" She fumed for a bit longer, then gave up, and started to watch anyway. That, in conjunction with what she ate, was probably a bad call. ------------------------------------------------ It had been a long day for all concerned. Two were left in the computer lab, putting in a bit of overtime. "Well, that's all," reported Maya. She turned to face her superior. "Sempai, what's been bothering you all day?" "I'm...not sure. Don't worry about it." Ritsuko shook her head. "Call it a day. Let's go, Maya...." She trailed off. "Hmm?" said Maya. "HA! That's it!" shouted Ritsuko, jumping out of her seat and snapping her fingers. "Is...what?" asked Maya, weakly, from ground level. "Your name. It's being spelled with a 'ya' now, instead of 'ia'." NERV's chief scientist nodded with satisfaction. "..." "Author finally wised up, I guess. Okay, we're out of here." ------------------------------------------------ A bit later that night.... Mari yawned, put aside her copy of _War and Peace_, turned out the lights, and curled up under her blankets. Early the next day, in the EVA control room-- "DAMMIT! Why'd EVA-03's interface get set to Russian AGAIN!? Every freaking morning this week!" ------------------------------------------------ "Good morning, and how is our patient today...Souryuu-san? You don't look very well. Didn't you sleep last night?" "Nightmares...horrible nightmares...Bishoujo Senshi G...Giant R-- Robo...couldn't sleep...." "Oh, my." ------------------------------------------------ In the heavens, far, far above our beloved and behated characters, doom approached, and it was ugly.... Oh well. Wait for it. ************************************************ "Happy, now?" The writer ran from a storm of requests for part 4. "ARGH!" *** To be continued.... *** Part 4 should be, indeed, sooner out. I have my ideas running already. Here's to hoping, yes? Credit to Tom Rothamel for inspiring the joke about the Drazi. If you don't get it, you've missed a great episode of Babylon 5. If you don't know Babylon 5...shame.