My own personal rants.

Pretty self explanatory. Without further ado, here are my rants.

Tuesday, August 12, 2003 (12:16 AM)

Mood: So freaking tired

I am in the mood to type quite a bit this time around. Without further ado, here it is.

Sleepless blues: Today I had to worry about getting my books for my school. My intention was that I wanted to get them in the morning so I didn't have to get them later..  The night before I had planned to sleep early so I can wake up... Freakin bein the insomniac I am, I was out with my friends  till like 3 in the freakin morning when 3 of my friends sitting outside am AM PM drinking a 64 oz Cherry Pepsi with my friends and finishing my pack of cigarettes just talking to my friends. (more on this later).  Being that I wanted to finish the house at 7 in the morning and since if I were to sleep right at that moment, I would not be able to wake up till like so much later in the day (say like aorund 11 or 12). So being the genius that i am, I came up with a plan to stay awake. I got off the computer at around 5 in the morning. The day before my dad bought a NEW DVD PLAYER FOR THE HOUSE!!! Also since my genius friend left his anime DVD stash in my car, I just took it out and browsed in it, watching all of the second volume of "Rune Soldier."  That sure killed a good hour and 30 minutes, just enough time to take a shower, eat a bit and leave after I was done watching the anime. 

 The only problem was that I arrived at the school real early at 7:15 only to find out that the place didn't OPEN till 9:00!!!!  That is practically 1 hour and 45 minutes of waiting before the damn store actually opened.  During that time of waiting, I had to fight the droziness while not kill myself for passing the time.  So I busted out my CD player and played some ridge racer music while I practiced my kanji a bit at least. At around 7:40 I rested my eyes, only to be awakened by my friend jay at 8:05 with him running into my legs on his roller blades >-<. Well at least I didn't have the urge to sleep much.  After playing a game of KoF with Jay laying down on the DDR machine next to it (o.0), I found out that they started to make a line outside the book store. Thankfully I arrived there when the line was just barely starting, so it was just a matter of standing for 30 minutes waiting for the store to open.  Walking in now with some funk music playing, I got my books, paying only a wopping 350 or something dollars on them, and met up with my friend jay, asking me if I could drive him home.  

By this time it was like 9:15 in the morning I believe and my friend Jay was hungry. It also happened that he didn't sleep at all the night before cuz he just so much likes talkin on the phone =P.  Anyways, we went to a Burger King and he treated me out to food =).  It sure was good to taste BK Chicken again, so juicy and stuff. Newayz, after eating, I drove jay back to his house, which was funny since when I was there, I found a great box of crap (Jay knows what I speak of).  Newayz, I ended up staying there at his house till like 11:00 just waiting for someone to hang out with.  After taking a nap. I thought I would be a genius again and take a NODOZ, An evil pill that creates insomniacs in this sleepless society! At this point, I left Jays house back to the school again to search for Adrian.

When i arrived back at the school, i walked back to the bookshop, only to find my crazy Japanese friend, Jun, who I have not seen since the whole summer time. I used to have him for Japanese 2 and he is fun to talk to. We mostly talked about manga's and anime series that we both liked to watch and read, one of which being Katsura and his works.  I also showed him my Digi Charat book, where we both looked at the evil cute things. There I learn about some of the costumes that Digiko was wearing in the book =). He also read back to me the bio's of Pyoko, the Black Gema Gema Dan, and also some of the minicomics. At this point, we both split and I looked back at the book store (it was 1:00 PM at this time) where I found my friend, Adrian.  At this point, The NODOZ was taking its effect on me where I was awake but my body really wanted me to rest.  While with him, we talking about a few things concerning the club and some personal issues then we split, him going to the mall while drove to Juan's, but not before giving back Adrian's anime stash with him.

It must have been like 1:30 PM when I arrived  at Juan's. only to find his arse on the bed. =P. First thing I did... Pull out the bed underneath his and lay down on that. It was great talking to Juan about a couple of things that concern us really. Then i dozed off at some point, only to find myself waking up at like 3:30 PM. It was really weird to try and sleep at this point. The NoDoz must have made my body feel hotter than usual and it was kinda hard to focus really hard on playing KoF.  There were some good games on that game though.  I ended up leaving Juan's house at like 6:00 PM right after resting up more.  It sure does feel good at his house for some reason btw... The air conditioning feels good. 

I believe i arrived home at 6:30 PM to find my baby nephew there on the kitchen with my mom. He is being his usual self, curious, being a baby, you know those things. Newayz, i started to get some left over dim sum when my sis and my brother in law arrived. My bro in law had a cast on after spraining his leg before so it was cool to see him walking again, though it was also entertaining to see him limp.  After I was done eating and watching my bro in law play with my nephew, i went upstairs to try and take a nap for a bit. Somehow I went downstairs at like 7:00 while by sis and hubbie were about to leave. It was at this point that they went back inside the house and played the freakin Karaoke >-<... well my sister anyways. There is nothing better than listening to off key singing i tells ya, though she is actually not too bad. I also had a small converstaion with my bro in law about NoDoz. anywayz, I got really tired at this point so I went upstairs at like 8:00 PM about and went to sleep. 

At this point, I woke back up at like 12:00 midnight, which is where you find me at this point, typing this huge arse rant.  At this point, I believe the NoDoz wore off and the amount of sleep i got throughout the day was enough for the night that i missed.... let see.... 20 in the CC, 10 at Jays, over 2 1/2 hrs at juans, and a little more than 4 hours at home... i got  around 7 hrs of sleep. That is the bare minumin a person should sleep so yeah I got enough. I am really tired at this point though and i have work today at like 3:00 PM. I really want to sleep at this point but internet is freakin evil. And i guess when the NoDoz wears off, it hits you HARD!!. thats the after affects that i am feeling at this point. Whew this is a funny feeling =P Newayz. i am done with this rant. I guess ill start this another =) . 

Told you i was in a typing mood.

(Ended 1:43 PM)

Friday, August 8, 2003 (3:38 PM)

Mood: Unsure

Duty: Sometimes there are those days when you just want to act serious the whole time through.  I feel that I  want that that kind of day later. I don't feel like dealing with whatever BS that is there.  Kinda just do what I have to do and that's it.  Somehow it feels like I am more interested in fulfilling my duties before I feel like doing anything else. This is one reason why I am more interested in finishing this website rather then really going out and having fun.  It's kinda like knowing that I have to do homework without the burden of getting a grade. Rather, this is for my own satisfaction so I have the feeling of actually doing something that I can call my very own.

Trading the Old for the New:  Hell I have grown and met many people in my life. It is college that I have met many of the friends that I have today.  As it goes, things change over time.  One thing I feel bad about is that I hang a lot of time with my evil friends at my college however as time goes on, I spend less and less time with my old friends.   Could it be that I am separating from my old life?  Then again, I wasn't necessarily happy in the past.  Back then I had few friends, longed to make more, but was too shy or afraid to go up to them.  Then there are the experiences that I would like to just shun from ma life but I can't because that is how life goes.  In any case, that life had me feeling rather lonely and empty.

Then comes my life when I slowly start to drift away from old friends and start to make new ones.  It is funny because these new friends gave me the sense of who I really am now.  And also, in contrast to what I felt from my old life, I had a sense of belonging in a group of crazy people. I guess this is a satisfying feeling more or less.  From these group of friends I met my really close friends that I wouldn't mind staying up all night with just talking about whatever is on our minds.  When you find something like that, it, at least to me, gives me a strong sense of comfort that people actually do care about me.  Nothing is more blissful then feeling like you belong. (Yeah I know I sound soft, but you know, ridicule me for it and I wouldn't mind kickin yer ass.)

However, there is then the problem of keeping friends from my old life.  So much has changed since then and I find myself drifting away from it, and i do have a sense of guilt. If there was a way to merge my old life with my new life so easily, I would try to make it that way.  But for right now, it seems impossible.  At the very least, I can find comfort that at least from my old life, my few good old still acknowledge my existence.  I guess nothing can really get any better than it is at this moment. At least for right now I am well. As long as I can be with people from my old life from time to time, I can happily live with what is now my usual gang.  In a sense then, I can, in my own devious way of thinking, see this as my new life.

The One:  I really don't know how to feel about finding my very own other person.  Some of my friends say that having my very own girlfriend is gonna make my life so much better than it is right now.  Does that mean I have to look for that one person right at that moment? While my friends give me a lot of good feelings anyway, there is still that obsession of finding that someone that will be by your side. It also helps for it to be a girl.  It does suck to long for that special someone from time to time that you feel lonely and feeling like killin yourself.  What keeps me going though, my duties, my sense of living, and also a hope that someday that person will come.  The last one is a stupid reason to me but you know, it keeps me going.  If and when that person does show up, I hope that at that time i will be ready to give it my all to keep her for my very own. (not in a hardcore possessive way)

Monday, August 1, 2003 (3:03PM)

Mood: *sigh*

I got the Job: Just so you people know. I got the job. Its too bad it is a temporary job. I am going to start this tuesday. I am not exactly sure what I am going to do, however.

Drunkness: On Saturday, several of my friends and I celebrated Jay's b-day.  He is 21 now. That means alcohol, which means getting wasted.  That day, I seemed to drink the most I have ever drunken at this point. Lets see.... I drank 4 Coronas,  5 shots of Vodka, and I think 4-5 shots of Jim Bean. I also drank a little bit of Jays special creation of Red Bull, something schnobs, and ...one of those hard liquors. It surprisingly tastes pretty good.  I tell you, I got quite drunk that night =). Thankfully I didn't get a hangover the next morning.

Website making:  Looking back at my site, I realized that there are so many freaking stupid mistakes here and there. Broken linkies, that sort of thing. Also the way the site was made didn't seem to fit me. This is why I felt on redoing the site layout. At this point, I am actually growing quite fond of this format. Now it is just a matter of redoing this site, which i can imagine is going to take some time.

Monday, July 28, 2003 (5:02 PM)

Mood: A bit relived but also a bit worried.

Pictures shown:  I finally got some pictures posted on this site.  I had some trouble a few days ago about the format  but now I got something simple. I am glad to have worked on this site a bit more =)

Interview tomorrow: Tomorrow I have an interview at my college for work at the student store. I really hope I get this job.  Its been a whole summer and I hadn't worked this whole time and it is rather irritating getting pushed to get a job.  Now this is my best opportunity to get it. God I hope I hope this job. *prays*

Saturday, July 26, 2003 (2:05 PM)

Mood: A bit overwhelmed

Website is evil: This is the 3rd day that I have been working on this website. looking at everything I have so far, I cannot help but feel that this is going to be a lot of work ahead of me. Also some things here and there aren't exactly working at the moment. (there is supposed to be a picture on the upper right hand corner for goodness sake.)  Anyways, I cant wait till I actually get the main jist of this site done. I do have a few plans  like put a dark red design on the background, change the title design, and put a character in this cell.  I guess I will have to take my time. *sigh*

Friday, July 25, 2003 (2:57 PM)

Mood: Enlightened

Abbreviated names: NAI. Its perfect for a title for my website. I stumbled upon it when I was thinking about how my title for my site would look like. I then realized that N (Numakie), A (Anaki) and I (Inc.)  make the japanese word Nai, which to my understanding is the plain form to turn a sentence into a negative. I know it is just a coincidence but it is PERFECT for my website. hehe I am happy. Now it is just how to design my logo for my site. 

Thursday, July 24, 2003 (4:12 P.M)

Titles: It is about time that I got my title down for my own website. I swear it has been bothersome trying to get something to get my website going.  It is my thinking that the title of the website can mean everything to the start of the whole deal and the main problem is trying to figure out what can explain the way I  feel, think, etc.. I do feel myself that I am a person who is crazy at times but there are those times which I want to feel serious. Then there is the issue of explaining both of those sides of which make me. Then came this idea. I have 2 names that repeatedly keep ringing in my head, Numakie, which I came to represent me, and Anaki, my female character creation. My serious/happy/demanding side comes from my Numakie. My light hearted, creative, strange side comes from my Anaki. From what I can see at this point, it is combining 2 parts of a person into 1 person and creating a unity, thus the Inc or Incorperated, or the uniting of many into one body.  This idea combined with the fact that i wanted to make up some silly name gave me the idea of combining both names Numakie and Anaki, and creating the weird name NumAnakInc.  I am at most Satisfied with the result and I hope that this helps me out in the future in at least my website.

Now: Right now though, i am keeping myself busy with trying to make up this website.  I am following the idea of K.I.S.S. (Keeping It Simple Stupid).  Once I am happy with that, I know that I will have time to improve on it in the future.

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