This is Mr. Taint, your #1 taint-man!

OH MY GOD!!! DOUBLE THE ROCK!!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!!

This here is Billiam, our Taint Records "man-on-the-run".
We send Billiam out on the road in a van that we bought him
to go out and see different rock bands all the time!!!
He sometimes comes back and tells us who's good and who's not,
but usually, he just sits in the van and drinks beer all day outside
in the K-Mart parking lot. Way to go Billiam!!!!

...And this is Josh. We're still not exactly sure what Josh
does yet, but those little voices inside me tell me that they
don't know what he does either.

Now this is a picture!!! Here is Kevin talking some things over
with his new girlfriend, Bambi, over drinks and dinner.
No, silly, of course I'm not talking about HER, I'm talking about the
cardboard cut-out!!!! She's not much of a talker, but boy do those
hands work fast!!! At getting me more beer!!!! HA HA HA!!!

Here is ultra-rock-star Keith signing an autograph for one of his
many, many very young fans. Keith is such a big star, in fact,
that he signs autographs for people that don't even ask for them,
as you can see in the picture above, where Keith is signing
some kid's biology notebook that he accidentally dropped on the ground.