https://www.angelfire.com/art/letters/moreletters.html
writegirl@altavista.com
A-man,
Your brain flew right out of The University of Chicago and landed on the shores of Lake Superior one summer day, just minutes before the Fourth of July.
There I sat on a big boulder all pathetic, confused and alone. You called me joyous. How could you see that in me? I thought my joy had been swallowed up, evaporated in the sun, scalded out onto the surface of this rock.
I told you about the radiation paintings I was going to do. We talked about it. I asked if it had color. You laughed and said YES! Radiation is color. Color is radiation.
I suggested, trying to understand:do you mean the sun sends radiation to us, which is light, which allows us to see the color?
You told me about wondrous things...dust particles, refraction, infrared. Then you ended by saying...some would say that the LIGHT is God.
I could feel your mind scuffle, arm-wrestling with science or God, you the physicist. You told me every detail about a special mass you had attended two days before we met, the way the it felt, a vespers service as the sun faded into the horizon, first glowing into the saintly stained-glass windows, then bouncing off all of the gold on the walls. Bits of songs sung in Latin, the wonderment that dug deep into your soul, your happiness that such a grand cathedral would be filled brim-brock on a lovely summer day.
How I envy you. A man, a person, someone who has found TWO things to believe in, even if you must make a choice. I have none. Empty and wondering. One thing, anything, would put me in a stupor. I want to glow with joy.
Thank you for stepping into my life.
FutureGirl