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Second Chance: Heero Yuy

by Chiisai Kitsune No Shi

	Many people long for a second chance on life, a chance to 
go back and relive their life, to better themselves.  But what if 
a person was given this chance, only to be eternally haunted by 
the dark memories of the old life?  Would they be able to repent 
themselves?  Or go slowly insaneby their ever-knawing conscious?  

	Every where he looked, every time his mind wandered, he 
saw the small child.  The little girl, laughing, and holding out a
small yellow flower.  And every time, he watched as the fire 
consumed her whole, her anguish printed clearly across her face, 
but she never called out.  Always silent, an angel of suffering.  
Always bringing back horrible night mares of that night, years 
ago...
	
        "Wake up!" Kitsune said sharply, hitting him in the head 
with her math book.  Heero looked up, and glared angrily at her.
	"What do you want!" he growled, but then found himself 
looking up at the teacher.  The teacher slapped the ruler down on 
the desk soundly.
	"Mr. Yuy, if you find you cannot show any interest in the 
class now, perhaps you could find interest in the class after school!"
the math teacher, Ms. Mugoi, snapped angrily.  Heero just nodded,
and sat up.  Kitsune began giggling after the teacher was out of
hearing distance.
	"Dude, I tried warning you!  Maybe next time I'll let her 
hit you in the head!" Kitsune said, giggling again.  Heero glared 
at her again.
	"Maybe you should shut up!" Heero spat.  The bell rang, 
and the class hurried to get out of the school and begin enjoying 
the evening.
	Heero, not bothering to wait for Kitsune, went directly to
his locker.  Though he had been attending the school for the past 
two years, he still had no friends.  Not beyond Kitsune and Shibo.
And, rarely, if ever, did he enjoy their company.  He preferred to
be alone, where he could sort out his thoughts, and untangle the 
tapestry of his past.  To try and put it behind him.  For, before
he had come to the school, and mingled with people, he had seen
the heavens and hells of the human race.  The deepest kept secrets,
which was driving even him slowly insane.
	"Ding dong, the which is dead!  All the little people.... 
all the little people.... all the little people jumped on her head? 
Hey, you know the rest of the words, Heero?" Shibo asked,
slamming the locker door shut for Heero.  Heero glared at Shibo,
and stalked past him on the way to the computer lab. "Take that as a
no!" Shibo yelled at his retreating form.
	"Told ya.  He is hella pissed." Kitsune said, bumping Shibo 
into a nearby locker.  Shibo glared at her, but Kitsune merely
grinned at him, and started walking after Heero.
	"Yeah.  I wonder why, he only had to put up with you all 
day." Shibo said, ramming her into the wall as they turned the
corner.  Kitsune glared back at him, and contemplated revenge.
	"That's not true.  I only see him during fourth.  He has to 
put up with you during English!" Kisube pointed out, ducking as 
a football went whistling overhead.  Shibo grinned, and waved his 
hands for the football to be tossed to him.  No one noticed, but
Kitsune took her chance, and rammed him into a water fountain.
Shibo winced, but avoided showing his pain.  Kisube began
laughing out loud, and several nearby people gave her odd glances,
but she was used to it.
	"That hurt!  You idiot, I should kill you for that!  Hey, get 
away from me!" Shibo yelled as Kitsune began another run to ram 
him into a nearby row of lockers.  People began to back out of the
 way of the two, like Moses parting the sea.
	"What, can't handle pain!" Kitsune smiled, triumphant.  But,
 as the two began walking onward to the computer lab, the people 
began to dissipate as school busses left, and cars drove away.
  Soon, there were only a few scattered handfuls of people in the
 hallway, waiting for parents to come and get them.
	"Dude, we'd better get to the computer lab.  Heero's going to
 wonder what happened to us." Shibo said, hefting his bag and
 starting toward the computer room.  Kitsune smothered another
 giggle, and followed.
	"For some crazy reason, I don't think he really cares."
 Kitsune said under her breath, and ran to catch up with Shibo.
	"So, you two finally decided to come." Heero said, not
 looking up from the computer monitor.
	"What, were you going to come looking for us." Kitsune
 said, sitting down at a chair, and, looking over Heero's shoulder,
 watching the program code go scrolling down the screen. "Stop!"
 She shouted, making both Heero and Shibo look back at her.
	"What's wrong, your brain fry!" Shibo cracked, trying to
 kick her chair, but she was to far away.
	"Ah, screw you Shibo.  Dude, look at that screw up, fifth
 line down.  You didn't adjust the VAR for the new figures.  You're
 reading off a direct character, not a VAR code." Kitsune pointed
 out, and Heero looked back to the monitor, and with a few quick
 strokes of the keyboard, he fixed the minute error.
	"That would explain why the arrow doesn't respond on level 
twelve, but not the armor on level 23." Heero said out loud to
 himself.  He had been surprised the first time Kitsune had pointed
 out errors in his programming, with the screen flashing by so fast,
 but it no longer phased him.  Her eye was quicker than his mind.
	"Dude, you deleted the armor code to put in place a read key
 function for the force field." Kitsune said, clicking PgDwn, and 
showing him, in the mangled forest of code, the exact line of the
 force field. "See, no armor code.  It won't read from the other levels
 because there's no map connection."
	"She got you good!" Shibo began laughing at Heero, but was
 silenced with a glare from Heero. "Spoil sport." he whispered under
 his breath, and went back to his program.
	"Yeah, but you left out the VAR key entirely!" Kitsune said,
 grinning over Shibo's shoulder.  Shibo turned red, and took a swing
 at Kitsune, but missed as she wheeled her chair out of range.
	"Cheater!" Shibo shouted, getting up and chasing her.
	"Get away from me!  Get away!" Kitsune shouted, wheeling
 toward Heero.  Heero stood up, and put out his arm, blocking
 Shibo from Kitsune.
	"Quit it." Heero said simply, not sitting down.  Kitsune
 began to giggle, and make faces at Shibo, but Shibo merely put his
 nose in the air, and walked back to his computer terminal.
	"Thanks a bunch, Heero.  You're my hero!" Kitsune said,
 bursting out laughing.  Heero merely glared at her, and sat back
 down again.  The smile fell from Kitsune's face.
	"People shouldn't run around in a computer room.
  Something could break." Heero said, not looking away from his
 monitor.  Kitsune looked at him for a second, then turned back to
 her computer.
	Within minutes, the three friends were absorbed in their
 three computer projects, not watching the time on the clock go
 spinning by.  But the clock didn't freeze for them, and the red
 light matched five, and the three still hadn't looked up.  But the
 lights were beginning to turn out automatically, and soon the three
 were left in darkness.  
	"Dude!  Where's the lights!" Kitsune shrieked when the
 darkness fell.  
	"Um... maybe they flew away?  Hey, it's already five!" Shibo
 shouted in surprise.  Heero, not seen in the dark, merely nodded his
 head.
	"Well, my parents are going to freak!  I told them I'd be
 home by 5!" Kitsune said frantically, collecting scraps of paper and
 disks into her bag-pack.  Heero and Shibo began doing likewise,
 though Shibo finally thought to turn the lights back on.
	"Hey, see you guys tomorrow.  I gotta book, I need to be
 home in five minutes!" Shibo shouted, and left the classroom.
	"Shibo, wait!  Give me a ride!" Kitsune shouted at him, but
 Shibo merely waved and kept running.  She sighed, and slung the
 pack over her shoulder, and started out the door.
	"I'll give you a ride." Heero said, walking up beside her.
  Kitsune stared at him as if he had gone nuts, but shrugged her
 shoulders.
	"Okay.  But my parents are so going to kill me!" Kitsune
 groaned, looking at her watch once more.  It was five thirty.  Heero
 nodded, but said nothing, and Kitsune decided not to pry. "This
 your car?  Looks like it went through a mixer before it went
 through the grinder!" Kitsune said, starting to laugh and the beat
 up four wheeled thing.  Heero glared at her, and she shut up.
	"Where is your house?" Heero asked, starting the car and
 letting the engine warm up.  Kitsune shivered as a blast of frigid air
 came out of the heater vent.  
	"Um, the north street off of Maine.  You know what I'm
 talking about?" Kitsune asked, looking over at him.  Heero just
 nodded his head in acknowledgment. "Good, because I'm going to
 be deep fried as it is.  Dude, by tomorrow it's going to be snowing."
 Kitsune said, looking out the car window, and readjusting the
 black gloves on her hands.  Heero merely nodded again, and turned
 onto Maine. "Okay, take a left here.  Yeah, that house right up
 there, the bluish one."
	As Heero pulled up in front of the house, the car stalled and
 died.  Kitsune giggled, but stopped as she saw her father come
 charging out the front door.  The door slammed behind him, but
 Heero didn't notice, he was trying to restart the engine, without
 much luck.
	"Young lady!  You had better have a good explanation for
 being home so late on a school night!" Kitsubes father started
 shouting.  Kitsune got out of the car, and closed the door behind
 her.
	"Thanks for the ride.  See you tomorrow, kay!" Kitsune
 winked at him, and looked back up at her father. "Dad, the time
 just slipped away.  I have homework, so move!" Kitsune shouted
 back.
	"Yeah, but you have plenty of time to do it now!  You're
 grounded!  No more computer lab and high jinks after school!
  Come straight home, and not another word!" the father yelled, and
 Kitsune let out a small whimper.  And, as Heero looked up from
 trying to get the car started, he saw the same note of anguish in her
 eyes, the same expression, as the tiny little girl had carried
 into her grave.  Heero decided he couldn't face watching that again
 without acting, without trying to stop it, without trying to fix what
 he had done.
	"Sir, it's my fault.  I asked her to stay late to help with my
 program.  Otherwise I would never had gotten it fixed." Heero said,
 stepping out of the car and trying to smile, but the smile failed
 miserably.  The father glared at him, then back at Kitsune.
	"So maybe you should think more responsibly next time,
 young man!  Kitsune, inside, now!" the father shouted.  Kitsune
 shook her head no, but Heero saw a tear trickle out of the corner.
	"Sir, please.  It was all my fault.  I am sorry, I even drove
 her home afterwards." Heero said, pleading as well as him stone
 voice could.
	"Yeah, Dad.  I was just helping a friend.  From the way
 you're reacting, you'd think the world was ending!" Kitsune
 shouted, slightly boosted by Heero's help.
	"No more out of you!  You're grounded!" the father shouted
 at her.  Kitsune burst into tears, and ran crying into the house,
 leaving Heero and the father glaring at each other.  Heero, seeing
 no sense of staying any longer, turned around and got back into his
 car.  The father turned around as well, and headed back into the
 house.
	As Heero drove to his home, he wondered silently why he
 had tried defending Kitsune.  He knew that all people must face
 their own battles, but that look in her eyes.  The way her twinkling
lights had dulled and gone out, haunted him.  Like little ghosts,
 telling him that he had done wrong, he had only made the situation
 worse.
	As he pulled the car up to his own dark, deserted house, he
 watched as the automatic timer turned lights on and off at will.
  But no shadows of people ever marred the scene.  His parents had
 gone traveling for the winter, and he wouldn't see them again for
 another month, maybe more.  But he was getting used to it.  They
 traveled so much, left him alone for so long, that having them
 home was the odd thing, not having them gone.  He looked down
 at his hands, which had gone numb from the biting cold, and
 looked back up at the empty house.  He sighed silently, and got out
 of the car, walking up the stairs.  There was no mail to grab, his
 parents rarely mailed him postcards anymore.  They had stopped
 caring, as had he.  
	As Heero opened the door, he saw something move out of
 the corner of his eye.
	"Hello?" Heero asked the lighted hallway.  Nothing
 answered.  Heero just sighed, and locked the door behind him.
  When he walked into the kitchen, turning on the light, he saw
 something move again, rushing out the other door.  
	"Who is there." Heero said into the lit living room.  The
 lights went out, but he turned them back on.  
	And there, curled up in a hovering little ball on the sofa,
 was a white puppy.  Heero looked at the puppy for a second, and
 walked over to it.  It jumped at him, but it was so small that it
 merely bounced off his chest, landing on the floor with a thump.		
"You should be outside." Heero said, picking the runt up by
 the scruff of the neck and walking toward the front door.  He set the
 puppy on the welcome mat, and pushed it away from the house.
  The puppy looked up at him sorrowfully, and whimpering to be let
 back in.  
	"Go home.  You don't belong here." Heero said, pushing the
 dog further away with his foot.  But, after a few minutes, Heero
 realized that the dog didn't have anywhere else to go.  He looked
 at the eyes, the sad and begging eyes, and felt memories washing
 over him once more.  Heero shook his head, and picked up the
 small bundle, carrying it back inside.
	The dog, once inside, began to whimper again, dashing
 back and forth from the kitchen to Heero, always with the same
 pleading look in its eyes.  At first, Heero just brushed the dog
 away, trying to do his math homework, but after a while, he
 realized that the puppy must be hungry.  He reluctantly got up, and
 walked to the kitchen.
	"There is nothing here for you to eat." Heero said to the dog,
 looking down.  The dog looked up, and walked slowly out of the
 kitchen.  Heero closed the cupboard, and walked back into the
 living room.  
	The clock struck nine.  Heero looked up, but not really in
 surprise, and looked down at the dog.  It had fallen asleep at his
 foot, and Heero did not really want to move it.  But he was tired,
 and he did not really care about the puppy, so with a slight jerk of
 his foot, the puppy was rolled off his foot, and soundly onto the
 floor.  The puppy looked up indignantly, but made no move to
 retaliate.
	"You stay here.  Or go home.  I must sleep." Heero said, and
 without further ado, he left the room.  The tiny dog merely followed
 him into his room, and snuggled on top of the covers of Heero's
 bed.  Heero brushed him off harshly while putting on his pajamas,
 and once more while trying to climb into bed.
	"No, you aren't to come into my room.  Sleep on the coach."
 Heero said, picking up the puppy, and putting him in the hallway.
  The puppy merely looked up at him, and curled up where it was.
  Heero made no move to stop him. 
	Slowly the seconds ticked on, and sleep began to descend
 upon Heero, bringing to him once more the dreams of a long
 distant past, and night mares of a too painful memory....
        
	The little girl, wearing an overlarge yellow sunbonnet, held
 the slightly wilted yellow flower out to Heero.  And with a laugh,
 Heero accepted the bloom from the small child.  Her dog, Yurusu,
 pulled on the leash, signaling that it was time for the rest of the
 walk to begin, they had been in the same place to long.  Heero
 thanked her, and gestured for her to continue on, that her dog was
 waiting.
	But, as she continued on, she turned around and shouted at
 Heero.
	"Why is it you are here?  Not many people like this place, it
 is too dark for them!" 
	"Because I wish to bring back the light to this place.  And to
 show people that the light has come, so that they might come!"
 Heero shouted back, without knowing why.
	"You are an important person, then!  My hope goes with
 you!" the little girl yelled back to Heero, and continued on her
 walk.  Heero smiled and waved at her, continuing on his way,
 looking back to make sure no one was watching.  
	That night, as the people slept, he pressed the small trigger,
 and watched as the military base was engulfed in a ball of flame.
  But nothing went as it was supposed to.  The building around it
 were not supposed to be harmed, but the flame was large, seeming
 to take a life of its own.  
	And, as Heero watched in horror, people ran from the
 building, screaming in fear and pain.  In vain, he looked around,
 searching for the little girl.  But she was no where to be seen.  She
 hadnot come out of any of the buildings, she was still in one of
 them, slowly burning.  But Heero heard a small cry, like that of a
 faint dove, calling from one of the burning apartments.
	Without thinking of what he was doing, Heero rushed into
 the building to save her.  But he was foolish, and had not thought
 of what it was like in the burning inferno.  Pieces of ceiling,
 dripping flame, came crashing in on him, trying to make him part
 of the ruin.  But Heero continued on, calling out in the smoke,
 calling out for the small little girl.
	A dog, the small puppy, let out a brief howl, signaling to
 Heero to where they were.  Heero, crashing through the remnants of
 a door, crashed into the burning room.  But, as he opened his eyes,
 he saw that it was too late, the inferno was already there.   A piece
 of ceiling crashed down in front of Heero, preventing him from
 coming any closer to her.
	"Nozomi!" Heero screamed, but the little girl just looked at
 him.	The fire was spreading out from her like a pair of angels
 wings.  But no angelic blessing was emanating from these, for only
 death came from the burning plight of the fire.  The little girl made
 no move to try to save herself.  She merely stood there, her eyes
 opened wide in anguish, tears running down her face. 
	As Heero stood there in horror, the small puppy whimpering
 at his side, the little began to speak.  But no words came, for they
 were eaten alive by the fire, but Heero heard them echo through out
 his mind, with the smoky voice of the flames.
	"You are impor...." with that dying gasp, the flames roared
 up around her, cutting off her life before she could finish her word.
	"Nozmoi!" Heero cried in anguish, but it was too late, she
 was already dead.  He looked down at the tiny white puppy, and
 watched as it struggled to breathe in the clouds of smoke that
 was billowing around them. "No, I should have been in that fire,
 not her!  Why did she have to die!" Heero started crying, pounding
 his fist on the ground.....
        
	Heero sat up with a start, tasting the salt of his tears in his
 mouth.  At first he just sat up in his bed, drenched in memories and
 sweat.  Then he noticed an odd lump next to him, moving.  He
 picked it up, and saw that the puppy had climbed back up onto his
 bed.  He glared at it, then noticed a strip of fabric tied around his
 neck.  He hadn't remembered it from before, and in the pale moon
 light, he bent and looked at it.  There was, in nasty scrawling, a
 word written.  And, as Heero sounded it out, more tears began to
 well up inside his chest.
	"Yurusu......." Heero looked at the small white puppy, and at
 its name tag, the same name the little smoke choked puppy had had
 so long ago.  He started to cry once more.  It was too much for him,
 the pain was too fresh for him to handle.  All he could do was sit
 there, curled up in a ball on the bed, and begin to cry.  But, as he
 began to cry harder, he heard a voice at the foot of his bed.
	And there, standing at the foot of his bed, outlined in the
 faint moonlight, was the little girl, dressed in her pale yellow sun
 dress.  She giggled, and held out a wilted yellow flower.
	"You are silly!" the little girl said, her voice like the faint
 breath of summer.
	"But you...!  You're dead!  I watched you die, I killed you."
 Heero said sullenly, wondering if he was dead.
	"Silly!  You didn't kill me!  Here, have a flower!" the little
 girl handed Heero the small yellow flower.  Heero took it in his
 hands, and looked at it with sorrow.
	"No, you don't exist." Heero said, holding the flower in a
 stony grip.
	"Don't worry, I forgive you!" the little girl said with a cock
 of her head and a giggle, and faded into the night.
	"Nazomi!" Heero screamed, but it was too late.  She had left,
 leaving Heero alone in the room with only his dreams for comfort.

	"Beep..... Beep..... Beep.... Beep..." the alarm clock stopped
 its annoying buzz as Heero hit the switch.  He looked around him,
 shivering in the cold of the morning, wondering for a second why
 he was lying curled up on his bed without the covers.  But in a
 seconds blink, the entire dream, and events of the night before,
 came back to him.  He shook his head, sure that it was just a
 nightmare.  But clutched in his hand was the wilted yellow flower,
 its petals beginning to turn brown.  
	"Oh god.  No, please, let this all be a dream..." Heero
 moaned out loud to himself, closing his eyes.  But when he opened
 them, the flower was still there.  Resting gently in the palm of his
 hand, as light as an angels feather, but there none the less.
	"No... no!" Heero cried, but it was of no avail, the flower
 existed, nothing he could do could stop that.  The alarm clock went
 off again, he only had ten minutes to get to school.  He looked at
 the flower once more, and got out of bed.
	"None of this happened... She's dead.  Gone.  She doesn't
 exist any longer!" Heero shouted at himself, pounding his fist into
 the kitchen counter and throwing a mug of coffee at the wall,
 watching the steaming drink slowly run downwards.  But it solved
 nothing, and only led to him being more angry.  But it was then
 Heero remembered the puppy, and noticed that he hadn't seen it
 all morning.  But he had no time to look for the small dog, school
 would be starting soon, and being late always attracted unneeded
 attention to himself.
	Heero's car was slow in warming up, but Heero didn't care.
  The cold no longer bothered him.  He had become too used to the
 chilling feeling that had inhabited his heart as long as he could
 remember.  As he pulled into the school parking lot, the heater still
 hadn't turned on, and his fingers had a slight blue tint to them, but
 Heero did not notice, or care.  To him, his life was not worthy of
 caring about.
	"Yo!  Heero!  Que pasa mi amigo!" Shibo shouted at his
 friend across the hallway, but Heero did not deem to reply. "Fine,
 be that way!"
	"Shut up, you're going to be late!" Kitsune yelled at both of
 them, rushing by and ducking into a nearby classroom.  Shibo
 ignored Kitsune's advice, and stopped at the drinking fountain.
  And, as Heero was sitting down in the classroom, and the bell was
 ringing, he saw Shibo go running by the door, late once more.
	"Stupid idiot." Heero said under his breath, but in the silent
 class, the words echoed up to the teacher.
	"So, Mr. Yuy, you wish to add something to this
 conversation?" the teacher, Mr. Rekishi, asked gruffly.  Heero
 made no immediate move to reply. "Since you seem to be at a loss
 for words, how about you allow me to do the talking!"
	"Hn" Heero said, lowering his head to look at the book once
 more.
	Half an hour later, while the class was busy looking up the
 history of one dead person or another, one of the girls started
 shrieking.
	"It's snowing!  It's snowing!" the girl shouted, making Heero
 look up and glare at her.  But the entire class was blocking his
 vision, in a hurry to watch the fluffy white flakes float down.
	"Class!  Class, get back to your seats!" Mr. Rekishi yelled,
 with no avail.  Once starting the uproar, there was no stopping it.
  Soon, Mr. Rekishi gave up even pretending to get the class's 
 attention, and let himself be mystified by the snow.
	"Attention school.  Due to the sudden snow storm, class's
 will be canceled for the rest of the day.  You are now free to go
 home.  Thank you, and be safe." the staticy intercom voice was
 suddenly overwhelmed by the cheers of an unruly high school, all
 students competing to get out first.  Heero sitting at his desk,
 making sure he had all his homework, when someone tapped him
 on the shoulder.  He looked behind him, and Kitsune was smiling
 meekly.
	"I wanted to thank you for..... thank you for sticking up for
 me yesterday.  I guess I should also apologize for my father.  He's
 usually a jack ass, but you got to see him at his best." Kitsune said,
 trying to wipe a grin off her face, but to no real avail.
	"Hn." Heero said, standing up.
	"Most people usually run in fear, so thanks for not acting
 like a wimp." Kitsune said, giggling with the thought of Heero
 acting like a wimp.  It was not something that she could imagine
 he could even do. "Dude, aren't you going to say anything!?"
	"No." Heero said simply, walking out the door and down the
 hallway.  There was no one else to be seem, except for a few
 teachers.
        When they reached the door outside, Kitsune groaned, looking
 out at the white wonderland, and the slushy street.  The busses
 were nowhere in sight, having already left with their loads.  Heero
 didn't even bother to glance at her as she stopped, he merely
 continued on toward his car.
	"Heero!" Kitsune called, running up behind him and tugging
 on his bag.  Heero turned around suddenly, glaring angrily at her.
  Kitsune smiled apologetically.
	"Could I get a ride home? Please!" she pleaded, shivering as
 a draft of snow was blown by suddenly.  Heero didn't even flinch.
	"Hn." Heero replied.  Kitsune took that for a yes, and began
 to follow him.
	"Slow down!" Kitsune complained, tugging on his bag once
 more.  But this time, maybe because of the cold, maybe because of
 something else, Heero's bag slipped to the ground with a clatter.
 "Sorry about that.  Didn't mean to!" she giggled, smiling
 apologetically.
	A snow ball went whizzing by, but Heero paid no attention
 to it, more absorbed in making sure his bag was okay.  A second
 snow ball, another spare thrown from a nearby snow fight,
 slammed into Heero's head.  Heero didn't bother to brush away the
 ice, watching instead the snow ball break apart as it hit the ground,
 exposing the ice and rock mixture.  
	But as Heero looked down, he saw a tiny yellow flower
 imbedded within the ice, silently reminding him of the little girl
 once more.  He reached down slowly, picking it up, and watching
 it shake with his hand.
	"Dude, that was some bean, you all right?" Kitsune asked,
 shaking Heero. "Dude, your head is bleeding!" she said, watching
 some red drops fall to the ground, blooming outward like a
 crimson flower in a bed of crystal.  But Heero didn't seem to hear
 her, or even notice that she was there. "Heero, you all right?"
	Heero looked up slowly, still holding the yellow flower.  He
 looked down as he heard a small scuffling of the puppy next to
 him.  The same white puppy, ash staining its coat, but no dirt
 appeared where the tiny dog whined in the snow.
	"Heero!  What are you staring at!  There is nothing there!
  Heero!  Heero!" Kitsune shouted, shaking Heero.  But as Heero
 looked up at her, directly in her eyes, Kitsune could see nothing in
 them.  Nothing but cold, lifeless, empty pools of cobalt blue.  But
 then Heero's expression turned to that of pure terror.  It was then
 Kitsune shuddered, backing away from Heero slowly.  
	Heero looked on with fright as he saw the little girl appear
 again, the flames surrounding her once more.  And once more,
 Heero found there was nothing he could do.  The smoke was
 clouding around him, trying to kill him, but letting him watch in
 terror as she was burned alive.
	"You..... were......" she mouthed, letting the flames speak for
 her.
	"Nozomi!  It was my fault!  None of that should have
 happened.......!  It was all my fault!" Heero cried, dropping to the
 snowy ground, tears running down his face.  But the little girl
 didn't go away, she just stood there, unable to escape the flames.
 Suffering in eternal agony and anguish.  And Heero could do
 nothing but sit there, weeping."Heero?  Heero!" Kitsune said as she
 watched Heero collapse to the ground, sobbing in misery.  But no
 matter what she did, he wouldn't wake up. "You asses!" she called
 to the other students in the midst of the snow ball fight, "Call
 911!!" she creamed, making them look up suddenly.  One of them
 grabbed their bag pack, and pulled out a cell phone. 
	"Nozomi...." Heero cried once more, reaching out at
 nothingness with a clenched fist.
	Ten minutes later, when the ambulance arrived and placed
 the nearly unconscious Heero onto a stretcher, Kitsune stopped
 them.  The med. looked down at her, wondering what was
 wrong.
	"Can I help you?" the med. asked Kitsune, wondering why
 she was staring at him oddly.
	"Please, what's wrong with him?" Kitsune asked, watching
 as tears rolled down Heero's face.
	"Depends.  What happened?" the med. asked back.  Kitsune
 shook her head, and looked over at the snow where Heero had
 fallen.
	"A snow ball just hit him in the head.  And he started
 calling out Nozomi.  Please, is there anything I can do!" Kitsune
 said pleadingly, looking back at her friend as they strapped him
 down.
	"Hey, Fred!  Come here!  Kid's got a death grip on
 something!" the other med. called out.  The med. Kitsune was
 talking to, Fred, rushed over to help pry open Heero's left hand.
	Inside, they found a dog collar inscribed Yurusu, and a
 faded yellow flower.  The med. handed them to Kitsune, looking at
 them curiously.
	"Just keep a hold of these for your friend here.  Don't think
 he'd want to lose them.  Come on, Cal, let's pack!" Fred shouted,
 and the driver started up the engine as Fred closed the doors,
 leaving Kitsune to watch the ambulance speed away.
	Inside the ambulance, Heero was unaware of his
 surroundings, conscious of only the suffering little girl, and the
 flame spreading around her.....

	Maybe one start in life is all we get, all we should get.  To
 have more, to be able to remember the same horrible mistakes for
 two life times, is too much.  It could drive even the strongest
 person slowly, and painfully, insane.