I free fall in oblivion, lost footing and now I am infinite. My emotions black when you told me, but didn't tell me. It hurts me and I cough. It exploded in my chest, became inferno, became cinder. Now I look at my reflection, there is my disgust. A double-fisted motion, and the mirror is shattered. Attention directed to the blade decorating my arms in red tint. To later run my fingers across the graphs lining my skin in remembrance. Grip the shard and thrust it into my neck, I fall. Breathe shallow, I'm living in shades of gray as it slips away from me. You'll turn away from me even now. Know I am unsettled only when I return to haunt. To need what isn't there, to break and beat myself. When I can't control my fate, and you pulled the trigger on my reality. Stuttering thinking, bleeding open, it rushes away from me, my demons wail and compromise my sanity. Slumped in a corner, ready to exist only in memory. Evidence never lacked, just overlooked, you take me for granted. My hands can't stop this now, progression to far. Never able to deflect the blows. The worst is never over, all signs were showing. I boil over and am lost. Chased in mass and bludgeoned. The jokes on me right? Why concern yourself when I deserve to die. I see everyday what could have been, what I'm not worth, what I'm not deserving. I'm tired, they've all rejected me. I drop my hands to my side and realize my situation, I choose to end. To much I can't let go of, to much that hurts me. I need my finality, I need what I can't have and won't have me. Why have you forsaken me?
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