Charlotte Briggs stared at her reflection in the mirror, her already pale skin translucent. Silent tears streamed down her face and the misery she felt showed plainly in her eyes. Everyone kept telling her she should be happy, that she'd caught the Season's most highly regarded bachelor, but she couldn't be happy. Not when her heart was breaking in two. Charlotte had never meant to catch the eyes of Lord James Grant, let alone his heart. Her own love belonged to another but knew he didn't return her love, and so had resigned herself to never marry.
Unfortunately her beauty, combined with her sweet nature, had served the opposite. And so now she sat in her room after having been given in marriage to Lord Grant earlier that day. He had asked Charlotte's father for permission to marry and his request was happily granted, much to the dismay of Charlotte herself. It's not that Lord Grant was cruel or unhandsome. Quite the contrary, he was very handsome, charming, rich, and had been the target of every Mama's aim. It's rather ironic that the he should want the one lady that didn't want his attentions. But it was all too late now, the announcement would be printed soon and invitations sent out. Charlotte wiped away her tears and took a deep breath. If she couldn't change her fate then she might as well accept it and make the most of it. She blew out her candle and spent the night in a restless sleep.
During the next few weeks Charlotte divided her time between her fiancé, dress fittings, and other wedding preparations. In fact, so much time was spent on these task that she felt like she hadn't one moment's peace to herself any longer. And so one morning she rose early and dressed before the rest of the household to take a walk. As she stepped outside and took a deep breath, she felt all the last weeks stress melt away.
Not wanting to chance passing up her fiancé even at this early hour, Charlotte turned in the opposite direction from his town house. It wasn't long before she realized she was being followed, the footsteps echoing her own on the road. At first she was startled and a bit nervous wondering whom else could be out at this early hour and why they would be following her. Then she was annoyed. She had come out for some time away from the stress of the last few weeks and now someone was following her. Probably her fiancé… Charlotte turned around quickly, with a frown on her face, ready to give a good tongue lashing to whoever it was.
She gasped at the sight before her, certain she was dreaming. "N-Nathan…I mean, Mr. Warner!" she took a hesitant step toward the only man who would ever hold her heart. "What are you doing here?"
Nathan Warner gave her a strained smile as he walked closer. "Miss Charlotte, it is good to see you again. You look lovely as always." He tentatively took her hand in his and lifted it to his lips. As he straightened, his took in her pale complexion and strained expression. "Are you well?"
"I…I, yes I am well, thank you." Her eyes darted nervously around her. If she didn't leave his presence soon she was certain the tears would start again. To see him once again and know that now it was completely impossible to have him. She took a shuddering breath, "Are you in town on business?"
"Of a sort, Miss Briggs…" Nathan was cut off by the sound of approaching footsteps. He turned just in time to see a distinguished, middle-aged gentleman, his face set in grim lines.
Nathan glanced back at Charlotte, whose eyes had widened in recognition. She quickly shook off Nathan's hand on hers and stepped around him. "My Lord, what do you do out so early this morn?"
James glanced from one person to the other, suspicion burning in his eyes. "Charlotte. I had come to see you this morning and found that you had already left. I thought maybe you had come this way since I did not pass you in the other direction."
"I had just been walking when I came across an old friend of mine. Lord Grant may I introduce Mr. Warner." Charlotte's voice shook with nervousness, and the two gentlemen bowed stiffly to each other. She smiled weakly and asked, "Would you like to join us for breakfast this morning, Mr. Warner?"
"Ah, no, I have some business to attend to Miss Briggs, but thank you. Good day to you both." With that Nathan continued down the street.
Charlotte stared after him with a wistful expression before heaving a big sigh. She turned back to Lord Grant with a tremulous smile on her face, not quite able to hide her sadness. "Shall we go back, my Lord, or shall we walk for a while more?"
James regarded her for several moments, wondering who Mr. Warner was and just how good of a friend he was to Charlotte. "Let us head back. I am sure the others will be waiting on us for breakfast by now." He offered his arm, which she took gratefully as she now had a headache.
They walked on in an uncomfortable silence, James's mind filled with questions. Halfway to the townhouse, he finally spoke. "You and Mr. Warner are good friends. How long have you known each other, if I may ask?"
Charlotte glanced over at him to read his expression, but it was completely blank. "Mr. Warner and I have known each other most our lives, sir. His own parents live but five miles from us and often times visited."
"Mmm, and is Mr. Warner married?"
"I do not believe so. The last time I saw him, I thought he had found a lady, but I never heard anything of it. I only know that he has been to the continent these past two years." She glanced at her fiancé once again but still his face gave nothing away. They were now approaching her townhouse and she sighed with relief.
Lord Grant stopped walking, staring blankly ahead of him. Charlotte regarded him curiously for a few moments before asking, "Are you well, sir?"
He smiled a bit and looked at her, "Yes, I am, but I have one more question to ask of you, Charlotte. And do be honest with me."
"W-Well of course," she stuttered, surprised by his grave tone. "What is it you wish to know?"
He didn't answer immediately but gazed at her with a sort of sad expression on his face. "Charlotte, I knew when I asked for you in marriage that you did not love me. No, do not protest, I am not blind. But I knew you were kind, sweet, and easy to converse with; everything I had been looking for in a wife. I thought that maybe one day you would learn to love me." Charlotte was now very confused and couldn't think of how to answer. But James hadn't finished. His smile was ironic when he continued. "But when I came upon you this morning and witnessed how you looked at that other gentleman, I knew that you loved another…"
This time Charlotte did protest, "No, sir…we…"
"You do not have to deny it. It was written clearly on your face. But I must ask you a few questions and think before you answer. If that gentleman were free to marry you, would you give up our engagement to do so? And secondly, if he were not free, could you find it in your heart to love me? I see I've shocked you, but I must know. I do not want a miserable wife that will hate me in the years to come, nor do I want to end up hating her as well. Think on it, Charlotte, and I shall return tonight to receive your answer. Until then, adieu." Lord Grant bowed and left a dazed Charlotte standing in front of her home.
Upon entering the house, Charlotte went straight up to her room to lie down and think over what James had said. He had been more than kind to her and she couldn't understand it. How could a man be so considerate after just finding out his fiancée loved another? There was no sense to it. But her mind soon turned from Lord Grant to Nathan. The last time she had seen Nathan was the most painful memory of her life.
It had been her first Season in London and Nathan had been there as well. Charlotte had loved him for years but hadn't let on because he had never shown his feelings in regard to her beyond friendship. She figured with time he might come to love her and so had been patient, undemanding. But on the night of her friend, Melissa Harrison's coming out ball, Charlotte was to learn differently.Nathan had asked Charlotte before they arrived to save two dances for him and she had flushed with pleasure. Halfway through the ball, when Charlotte finally escaped from the dance floor, she went in search of Nathan to claim her promised dances with him. Unable to find him inside, she went in search of him outside. It wasn't unusual for both of them to escape these social gatherings for some peace and quiet.
It was a clear night and the Harrison's garden smelled of foliage and rain from earlier that day. Too busy enjoying the beautiful night, Charlotte almost didn't notice the couples standing at the edge of the garden, locked in an embrace. She blushed and turned to leave but then she recognized whom the gentleman was. She couldn't prevent the choked sob that escaped and alerted them to her presence. Melissa smirked when she realized who it was, while Nathan wore a pained expression. Charlotte seemed rooted to the spot, but when Nathan spoke her name, she fled from the Garden as fast as she could. Finding her parents inside, Charlotte claimed to feel ill suddenly and requested to be taken home. She hadn't seen Nathan before she left the ball, and refused to see him during the next few days as well, still claiming to be ill. A week later she received a letter from Nathan, but still hurt, had tossed it into the fire and had not heard from him since.
The only information she had of Nathan after that was from his parents during their visits or in their letters to her parents. She had never heard of an engagement or marriage between Nathan and Melissa but she had never forgotten that night when she realized he didn't love her.
Charlotte lay on her bed weeping over the past and dreading the future. She eventually cried herself to sleep, thoroughly exhausted and emotionally drained.
"Charlotte. Charlotte dear, wake up." Mrs. Briggs shook her daughter lightly and brushed her hair back from her face. "Are you feeling better, darling?"
"Mmm, what time is it?" Charlotte squinted against the light coming in from her windows. Since her bedroom faced west it had to be evening. How long had she slept?
"It is just after six, and I thought you might be hungry. I can have something brought up for you if you'd like." Mrs. Briggs expression was full of concern. She knew something had been bothering her daughter of late, but with all the wedding preparations, she hadn't had time to talk with her privately.
"No, I am not really hungry…" her stomach chose that instant to make its protestation known. Charlotte grinned. "OK, so I am a little hungry."
"Come on then. Cook prepared a wonderful dinner that you missed earlier, I am sure some of it is still left over." They both headed down to the dining room, and Mrs. Briggs sent for a servant to fetch some food. "Oh, I almost forgot. Lord Grant came over earlier to speak with you, but when he learned you had fallen asleep he said he would return tomorrow morning." Frowning, she asked, "Is everything all right, dear? He seemed quite distracted."
What little appetite she had moments before disappeared as her stomach tightened. "Yes, mama, everything is fine. I am sure he just wanted to speak of our wedding or some such thing."
"Hmm, well you know if you need to talk I am always willing to listen."
"Thanks mama." Charlotte whispered hoarsely, once again on the verge of tears. Luckily the servant came in at that moment to serve her food. She ate very little but did admit to feeling better now that she had. "I'm still rather tired, I think I'm going to retire for the evening."
"Alright, Char, get some rest and you'll feel better tomorrow." Mrs. Briggs smiled to her daughter and kissed her cheek. "I have some more news for you. Guess who has returned from the continent?" Charlotte's smile froze, but her mother continued. "Nathan Warner! Do you believe it? Why it's been years since we last saw him. I have invited him and his parents over tomorrow as well. I hope you don't mind darling."
"…No, no I do not mind."
"Good, I am sure you will be glad to see him as well. You two were always close when you were younger."
"Yes…" Charlotte hesitated.
"Oh goodness, here I am blabbing off your ear when you are tired. Off to bed with you, don't want you coming down sick. Good night, darling."
Charlotte trembled the whole way to her room. How was she to survive a day in the company of her fiancé and the man she loved? Her headache returned full force as she readied for bed.
The next day found Charlotte in the library, staring gloomily into the flames of the fire. She still hadn't figured out what she was going to do. Being around Nathan made her entire being ache with yearning. And she didn't know what she was going to tell James…how could she answer those questions honestly? If she did, what would he do? Maybe she could love him in time, but with Nathan near at hand…
Suddenly the library door was opened. Ames bowed and announced the arrival of Mr. Warner, before closing the door behind him, leaving Nathan alone with Charlotte. They stared at each other in silence for what seemed like hours. Then he strode further into the room, his expression pensive. "I hope you are well, Miss Charlotte."
"Yes, I am. Thank you, Mr. Warner," None of the nervousness she felt came through in her voice, and for that Charlotte was grateful. "And how are you this morn?"
"I am well…I am sorry to burst in on you like this but I had to speak with you."
Charlotte's eyebrows raised in inquiry. "Certainly, have a seat please."
"Oh, yes, thank you." Nathan sat across from her in another chair and fiddled with his hat for a few moments. He glanced around the room like he had never seen it before when in fact it had been like a second home to him when he was younger.
His nervousness made Charlotte even more so as the silence stretched. Finally, he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "I heard about your engagement to Lord Grant… My congratulations."
"Thank you."
"Um, I…it's just that." He glanced away, and then stood up abruptly. "Charlotte, you cannot marry him!"
She blinked at his vehemence. "What do you mean?"
"Lord Grant. You cannot marry him, Charlotte. I know you do not love him! I should never have left for the continent. I thought I would have time to come back and…but that doesn't matter." Nathan now stood in front of her. "What matters is that I love you, Charlotte. I always have! You cannot marry him. Marry me instead."
Where Charlotte had been stunned a moment ago, she was now thoroughly dazed. A strangled sound made it's way past her throat and she stood swiftly, walking across the room. Tears flowed down her face as she sobbed into her hands.
Nathan came to stand in front of her. "Char…please do not cry. I am sorry, I never meant to upset you."
Charlotte cried even harder as Nathan put his arms awkwardly around her trying to offer comfort. He whispered softly to her until she had calmed down. She stepped back quickly, embarrassed at her outburst. "I am sorry, Nathan. I did not mean to cry all over you."
"You have nothing to apologize for. I should be the one apologizing. I had hoped you loved me as well, I always thought you had, but I guess I was mistaken. Of course you love your fiancé, I was being completely selfish and…"
"But I do," Charlotte laid her hand on his arm and just as quickly removed it. "Love you, that is. But I thought you did not love me…when I saw you with Melissa two years ago, I thought…"
Nathan swore loudly, "She never meant anything to me! She had asked me to meet her out there because she had something to tell me. When you came upon us, she had just thrown herself at me. I swear Charlotte I never meant to hurt you…I had planned on asking you to marry me that night. And when you ran away, and then wouldn't speak to me. I sent you a letter trying to explain but when you didn't answer, I thought for sure you hated me. I left hoping that maybe when I came back you might listen, that we might start over…" He sighed heavily. "Then my parents told me of your engagement and I came as soon as I could…"
The mention of her upcoming marriage was like a slap in the face. She had been moments away from launching herself in Nathan's arms when he had mentioned Lord Grant. "Oh my, Nathan, what am I suppose to do? I cannot just break my engagement, Papa would be so angry and it would cause such a scandal…" Charlotte trailed off as the subject of their conversation walked in. The color drained from her face. "L-Lord Grant…"
James Grant looked from one face to another, noticing both of their pale faces. He grimaced mentally but outwardly his face showed no emotion. "Mr. Warner. Miss Briggs, I take it you've made your decision then."
"I, um, I don't…"
"No, do not upset yourself. I told you yesterday to answer me honestly, and I can see now that if we did marry you would be miserable." James gave a strained smile. "I have only myself to blame for falling in love with a woman that could not love me in return. I shall break the engagement and wish the best to both of you. Good day, Mr. Warner, Miss Briggs." The library door shut quietly behind him. The two occupants inside stood in wonder at what just happened, unwilling to believe that their dreams had just been handed to them on a silver platter.
Nathan grinned suddenly, "Charlotte…will you marry me?"
Blushing prettily, hardly able to contain her happiness, she answered with a heart felt "YES!" Then she did step into Nathan's embrace, kissing him with all the love she had.
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