Disclaimers: Are funny. That's why we write them. *BG* These characters resemble two women that we know. But there's also where it ends. Thus this is called an Uber. The characters are very much mine (mineminemine and only miiine!) and are really nice once you get up close and personal with them. This is my first attempt at an uber in english, so I'm nervous! The uber is set in Stockholm, so every single street and shop is for real.
Love: Gay, lesbian, partner. Did you feel second thoughts running through your head now, you should probably leave. You should get yourself a set of gay friends, as well. It's really cool to have an open mind when it comes to accepting love and it's different forms... I mean; how stupid (but fun) wouldn't it be to type "AAAAAaaaagh! Heterosexuals exist in this uber! It's true!!! Run!" as a disclaimer, for example?
Sex: -But we hardly know each other!!! ;) -Insinuations and such, yes, but not sex yet. I'm a modest person who can't write sex scenes that makes people squirm, blush and swallow! But I'll try, someday...
Humor: I can't write anything that's thouroughly serious, so it's in there somewhere.
Violence: That would be an imagined fistfight with a wall in the story's second part.
Grammatics: I'm swedish and am not a hundred percent familiar with the english vocabulary and grammar. I'll just do my best and will try to translate this into understandable english, though. I'm struggling with the language and want to learn more. That's why I'll try to write in english now... I hope you can read it anyway! ...heheheh...and just to have fun I (of course) made tall, dark n' gorgeous' better half swedish, if you don't mind?
Consumed during this writing session: Well. I was kind of broke when I wrote this...so I drank water, chocolate milk and chewed some gum. That's all.
/J
Time to Say Goodbye
Part one: Prologue
Slam. The door shut close behind the familiar tall visitor whom, as usual, was a little late. That was ok, her hostess did not mind. She wasn't going anywhere. Rushed steps, steady and strong, walked towards the bed and came to a sudden halt. Colorful curses fell from the visitor's lips while she searched her backpack for the little rectangular box. She could not believe she had actually managed to cram all those things into it. Another curse, and then a triumphant, yet muffled, 'aha' was mouthed. The sound of plastic wrapping being torn from something with corners broke through the silence. The only steady sound environment in the room was silence softly mingled with the tactful and calm beeps coming from the med tech machinery that cluttered the wall beside the bed.
The tall visitor moved the chair aside and bent forward to kiss the still cheek of the short, silent form and let the sweetness of it linger for a while before she pulled her head back with a pained expression mingled with relief. She let her fingers trace a pattern, sliding tenderly and carefully up an exposed arm. A smile tugged the corners of her mouth as a longing glimmer misted the clear, blue eyes. Too soon. The fingers got hold of some strands of golden hair that stubbornly fell in the little blonde's eyes. Her tall companion tucked it behind her ear and couldn't resist to give her another kiss on the cheek and this time also a little peck closer to the soft lips. The tubes and medical equipment were in the way for any sweeter expressions of love. A white, big smile and then a low chuckle. "Jag vet." I know. Yes, she knew. Even if the silent form never replied anything. The tall woman reached back for the chair and pulled it to her. She sat down.
Beeeep. Beeeep."I brought you a deck of cards, sweetheart. I guess I just wanted to make sure you had something to do...to pass the time with."
"It's stupid, I know." Long fingers travelled through thick black hair.
Damn! Time always seem to shake me out of place. I could've sworn Nat's nose crinkled and that she was giving me that trademark tease look of hers. I wonder what she would comment that with? A smile. Anything that would tempt me to gather you in my arms and tickle you senseless til you yell 'I give up! I give up! Truce, ok?' And then you'd probably launch yourself at me and chase me around the apartment...and hours later we would find ourselves wrapped up in blankets eating icecream in the living room. Hehehe..yeah. 'Til you decided that I'd look good wearing that cold, sticky stuff and...
The deck of cards was thrown in the table drawer. Thank god those suckers had wheels! She put her hand on the flat, cold surface and pushed it aside. In it's place, the tall woman moved in closer with her chair. She blinked and searched for signs of movement in the small blonde's face. Her eyes denied her the hope her thoughts had ignited through memory. She sighed and caught a small hand in both her own. She frowned and bit her lower lip, consumed by the memories that rushed through her mind, soul, body and heart. A squeeze; movement against stillness. A half choked voice about to break.
"Jag saknar dig." I miss you. Hey, that's the understatement of the year; ain't it, Summers? You miss her so much it hurts. "Jag saknar dig så det skär i bröstet." Silence.
Beeeep. Beeeep.
A sigh, and soft lips kissing digits. Another squeeze, followed by fingertips tracing the lines in a small hand's palm. Joey swallowed, her mouth suddenly gone dry and a chill made it's way down her spine. Nat's life line broke off after three centimeters and then it continued a bit further down. A small panic arched it's claws in Joey's soul and she had to breath deep and slow to mentally gather herself. Stupid. Those new age ramblings that Karin used to do was just not for real. She never was a real ambassador for the occult, new age, whatever anyway! She was just fun to talk to; a good friend. A friend Joey had a feeling she would consult and talk to more often someday. Karin read far too much trash and was so full of shit with her 'I know this' and 'I've heard that', but nobody could ever complain about her loyalty to her friends. She was the kind of person that let go of what she had in her hands when any friend needed her. Maybe that's why Nat made friends with her in high school. Was it, sweetheart?, Joey thought and kissed the relaxed knuckles. Not a single twitch.
"Du vet...I just thought about that one time in november '98 when we were sitting in the kitchen with Karin. Do you remember that evening? It was getting colder and darker outside like it always gets to be that time of the year... Yeah, I know, I know; you like autumn. Remember, you said that the darkness is soothing, since there's really no danger lurking in it. Only silence and safety. Nothing can harm you in your bed at night except for tall, dark americans, right?" Joey laughed and got an alive glimmer in her blue eyes, while trying to remember. "But the most important thing with darkness, you said; is that is enables us to light it up. With candles and love that makes all those fears and uncertainties go away."
She moved closer to Nat, as her rich alto softened.
"You were that light for me. Whenever I was down and low you walked into the room and made it warm; made it's black and white coldness disappear into whirls of bright colours... I don't know how else to describe it. Just those raised blonde eyebrows and that questioning look with care in it could make my day, you know? Well. It's only fair that I tell you about how you still can do that. I know that babbling usually is reserved for you, but since I'm the only one talking nowadays, I might as well talk for us both, huh? Well... -where was I?" She looked at Nat with that little pause of hesitation the younger woman always had before Joey filled her in on what topic she was discussing.
The silence and beeps came back to greet her in answer to her pause. She sighed and caressed Nat's cheek. "Wake up, sleepyhead! I made pancakes, just the way you like 'em. Hey! HEY! Cut i- Ooow!!!"
"I want breakfast in bed..." , a low growl rumbling inside a chest and green eyes dark with desire.
"Humpf! I should put up a sign right here; 'Do not feed the swede!' ", a snort.
"Jooeyyy...are you really that hungry?...", smooth movements across the bed.
"Yeah! Hurry, bef- oh, yeeeezzzzz...I love when you do that..."
"I guess you won't help me out with this, huh? It's ok. Sooner or later, I'll have to manage myself." She smiled.
"-As if I didn't already; I remember that argument about the Post it-notes on the fridge door. You just had to systemize them, didn't you? You knew I was allergic to that intense, neon-Barbie-pink colour! It makes me want to puke! But I must admit that it worked. I only wish that I had systemized your sock hiding places. I could never figure out how those socks ended up under the couch or in the damn freezer!" Joey laughed and kissed Nat's temple. "You slob! But those were the early days..."
Beeeep. Beeeep.
"Now I remember! You, me and Karin was discussing former lifes and the current ones. She said that our actions in the former lifes come back to bite us in the ass when we least expect it. And since we all are modern people, we can't relate to why we end up in significant situations that in reality are similar to those that happened in the past. There are wrongs that we have committed that needs to be made right again, as well as rights that are the direct reaction to a wrong undiscovered. I don't even think she breathed one time during that nonsense lecture of hers. That was before the red went to our heads. That was a fine wine indeed..." The tall woman paused while watching the soft features of her life partner.
"...anyway; I thought about that palm reading stuff she did when you laughed and laughed... Heh. I shouldn't have made that joke, she looked pissed. But my not-so-sober me just revelled in the feeling of being able to make you laugh. Almost too busy watching your smile instead of listening. She traced your lines, in the palm, and told you about them...making her little predictions. The usual things; fame, fortune, kids... and then she just... stopped. She stopped and was so serious and didn't say anything more. I remember you asking about 'the long and prospering life' and her strained smile, followed by a quick 'hundreds and thousands of years'; that phrase we always exchanged, you and I..."
"I just traced your life line and... it just felt eerie. Like deja vu or something... I don't know. Just... eerie."
The door opened and a nurse stepped inside. Joey recognised her as Annika. The sixty-years-or-so old woman smiled at the tall american and walked towards her. If it had not been for Annika, Joey never would leave Nat's side. The kind nurse with the grey hair and greybrown eyes handled her partner with such love and care that Joey had come to admire her. But nevertheless a controlled feeling of sadness sweeped through her whenever she watched the older woman check that everything was allright. It was such a bitter irony that Nat in her gone self finally had gotten the mother she deserved. Annika would talk to her when Joey wasn't there, or when she was late. Annika made her bed in the mornings, she saw to it that the TV set was on and that Nat's appearance always was tip top. The extra efforts the old woman went through to make Nat's and Joey's life easier, came from genuine care. Sometimes Annika would even bring her grandkids to the hospital to read stories from their picture books. They would read to Nat and point things in the pictures, explaining them in the way children do. Joey swallowed the lump in her throat just before a hand was gently placed on her shoulder.
"Hur är det, Joey?" As usual, Joey's mind translated the words without any doubts. It was funny really, how easy it seemed to have gotten over the years. She remembered how hard it had been to learn the language, especially the pronounciation. "The thing with swedish Joey, is that it's one of the natural musical languages. Most words has a singing sway to it... like 'dig'. Dig is pronounced 'dei', but softer...no; not flat. Almost sing it... There you go! Now let's deal with å, ä and ö, ok?" Joey just sighed. She'd never learn to speak that damn language without an accent.
"She's fine, Annika. She breathes steady and slow. Just the way we want her to..." Blue eyes met doubting greybrown ones. Annika shook her head and the grip on Joey's shoulder grew more firm.
"I know how Nat's doing, Joey. How are you doing?" The nurse's voice was quiet, but serious enough for the younger woman to hear.
"Same old same old. You ok? And the grandkids?" Joey shrugged, turned her eyes back to the bed and continued to watch Nat.
"Niklas and Daniella are just fine. Niklas enjoys the daycare center and Daniella's happy with her third year in school. She's learning how to divide in the maths now. You know, with that new lying chair they use to count that sort of numbers... I don't pretend to get it and she just scolds me and whine 'but graaaaandmaaaaa' every time I say that the lying chair just isn't the proper way to use. I still do the staircase when I do division. She just asks me very polite to accept the new ways of society. They do grow up fast." She bent forward and patted Joeys shoulder, while handing the taller woman a cup with smoke rising from it's edge. "Here. I brought you some coffee."
"Tack." Joey took the cup and gave the nurse a grateful nod in return. She raised it to her lips and almost got her toungue burned. "YOW! Man, this stuff is lethal! It's too hot! Don't tell me; it's corridor coffee?"
Annika nodded. "Yes, I hate to deliver it to you, but the cafeteria is closed and doctor Endell is talking to his night team in the staff room, so I couldn't get it anywhere else."
"It's that late?" Joey looked surprised. Where did the time fly? "I'd better get going then. I promised mom I'd give her a call if it wasn't far too late. She's flying in sometime next week for a short visit. She'll stay a week or two. She hasn't decided yet. Ah, and I have to pick up Emma from Johansson too. She's likely to be asleep... I hate to wake her up, but I need to get her home so I can keep an eye on her. With the puppies and all..." She kissed Nat's temple and murmured sweet words to her silent life partner. "I'll be back tomorrow, Nat. I love you. Beat Annika in poker from me, ok?" One more kiss and time to go.
She stood to pull on her jacket, but found that she never had taken it off. She smiled embarrassed and gathered Annika for a heartfelt bear hug. The nurse rubbed her shoulder and patted her back. I wonder why straight women always do that? Joey chuckled and pulled herself out of the hug. She searched for her backpack, found it and looked up. Annika inspected her and nodded.
"There, there. You look good. Go get your dog and call your mom and we'll see you tomorrow."
"You're so nice to her, Annika. Thank you... from the bottom of my heart. It means a lot to us that you care for her." The tall, dark and grinning woman winked at the nurse and walked to the door. "See ya tomorrow, Annika! Maybe a little later than usual. Emma's got a hot date with the vet that could go a bit over time, unless he doesn't bribe her with a treat... labs! You know the drill. Take care, you hear? And say hello to Niklas and Daniella from me!" With those words the visitor stepped out. As the door closed her footsteps faded into the corridor and a vague 'ping' could be heard from the elevator as it's doors opened.
Annika turned to see the still form of a blonde little woman whose person was as enchanting in sleep as in life. The old woman walked to the bed and shook her head as she found the table wheeled out of it's way. She wheeled it back and shot a glance in the drawer. The cards had slided and one of them had turned it's upper side to her. A joker. Annika sighed and closed the drawer. She tucked the small woman in and stroke the blonde hair. Such a waste. She should have the rest of her life ahead of her. She's so young... They're both so young. And darn it; -it isn't fair! The nurse's sigh was heavy, as well as her steps, when she turned out the few lights, stepped out and closed the door carefully behind her.
Beeeep. Beeeep.
In a black room a still form awaited tomorrow. She couldn't see. She couldn't hear. And she was not going anywhere. But she was safe in the darkness. So safe and awaiting the daylight.