Topic: God things
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It is a very strange experience to go back to a place you've known and were intimately involved in after you've been away for a period of time. Things were different....a little bit forced, a little bit uncomfortable, a little bit weird. I guess we have incorporated into this new church pretty well, because now, to be around the former church people, it doesn't feel right. We felt a little like outsiders....not intentional on anyone's part...it's just the way it happens in the ministry. God grows you away from the people you had known, lived with, ministered to...and grows you into the new congregation.
Not that I felt uncomfortable around my old friends, I still felt loved and we enjoyed seeing everyone. But I can't get away from that feeling of strangeness.....that we didn't belong anymore. It hurt and will continue to hurt for a while. I"m sure some of them felt the sting too...of old friendships and ministry being pulled away....the familiar and comfortable become survival mode until things settled in again.
There was just not enough time to visit, to hug or to understand again. It was not a long wedding and we had to leave just before the reception began. We had to get home to rest before our Sunday services the next morning.
It was sad to leave and to realize...that is not our home anymore. God has been working to grow our hearts and connections here. That is a good thing. But I miss the old thing too.....
....maybe I always will.