Update on Dad Topic: People/Family stories I’m just running on fumes today. The stress of the last few weeks has caught up with me and now my brain is teetering between going comatose into sleep or exploding. Avoiding the subject or just giving brief accounts has been my tactic when people ask about how my dad or family is doing after moving my dad into a nursing home. Well, it’s not working, so I’ll try the more ‘out there, whine away’ approach and just get this over with.
First of all, when I say ‘nursing home’, I don’t mean a place with normally aging, but feeble people. I am talking about the alzheimer’s, dementia ward…..the secure, locked down ward. Most of the people there are in the advanced stages of dementia, so it’s kind of crazy and ‘interesting’. The second day I went to visit though, I got to know some of the other residents better, as well as the aids and nurses. I just have to remember that these people are just like my dad….normal people, who lived wonderful lives, but their minds have betrayed them and become diseased. Slowly they become this other person….a stranger really, who comes to take their place in your loved one. You catch glimpses of the real person in there at times, but usually there is a confused, uncooperative, sometimes agitated and aggressive person who masquerades as your dad….
The obsessive, paranoid, sometimes aggressive side won out and we could no longer care for my dad at home. I mentioned this once at an online message board and a few of the responses were quite condescending and clearly unsympathetic toward putting anyone in a nursing home. So I stopped telling people unless they asked or mentioned that they had gone through this themselves. In a way, it is a very private decision, but you feel the need to be understood, for people to know that you’ve done all you could but that it is a desperate situation that there is no other solution for. I don’t feel like I can share some of the most telling details in order to protect my family’s privacy. Some of the things my mom has told me about my dad’s behavior, I simply cannot share. So maybe if you’re tempted to think less of people because of decisions like this, maybe you could put on compassion and look at the individuals involved and not just at the situation of nursing homes in general.
****I just had to put this out there because I want to be understood. And if you cannot understand without having the private, traumatic details, then I can’t help you. I’m not trying to be ugly about this, but from the response I got that one time I shared, I’m just covering the bases in case it’s out there, ready to strike again.**** =)
My sister went with my mom and I to check my dad in on Monday afternoon. We took him to his hallway to talk to a nurse while my mom filled out paperwork. It is a Christian care center and the staff there is really understanding, gentle and compassionate. In the past 3 weeks, my dad’s condition has gone downhill almost with each passing day….his physical condition as well as mentally. So by the time we were ready to check in, he was not having any good days mentally. We think he is stressed out too, because we’ve been trying to prepare him for moving. In his lucid moments, he understood and though he wasn’t excited about it, he knew it was time….he knew his illness is getting way too advanced for my 80 year old mom to handle. We got his things settled into his room. I also put up a picture of my dad and one of my mom in their younger, stronger days, so that the staff there will see who he once was. We sat visiting with him in the general sitting area. The 3 men who are there tend to congregate by the door to the outside area in an alcove with a few tables, the women sit together in the main room chatting at the tables. I would say about 99 percent of them are sweet, content and seem at home there. One or two of them are a little mouthy and complain.
There are a few of the aids that I got to know a little better the 2 days I was there. One of them loves to get the residents singing. She bends down and in a low, slow voice begins, “Swwwinnnnnng looooooow, sweeeeeet chaaaaariot, “ and the residents all start joining in. It was very sweet! Although they are declining in life, they remember the hymns and enjoy singing. She did this several times and then turned off the jazz music that was playing and put on a CD of hymns. Suddenly the blank stares turned to sentimental looks and their mouths began following along with the words….and tears welled up in my eyes and trickled down my cheek. I think my dad will get to that point where he feels at home there and enjoys the moments like that during the day.
When we left, he didn’t argue or ask to go with us. He did keep asking how long he would be there. I could only answer him honestly, “Dad, you live here now. You are too sick for mom to take care of you at home.” And he nods and momentarily understands…yes, he does feel sick….and weak. He is discouraged but is trying to have a good attitude, I can tell. He seems very disoriented when we come to see him, but he gradually…usually after a meal….gets to feeling better and talks. It doesn’t usually make a lot of sense, but he does talk and talk. One day he thought he was there to sing for these people and kept apologizing to them all because he just didn’t think he could do it. He knows who we are, but not at all moments.
Sometimes he struggles between real and imaginary. Two weeks ago, I was visiting him at their home and he was telling me about traveling. It was kind of jumbled up and confused sounding story, but he went on and on telling me that he had had 2 very nice trips recently to China, Japan, Australia. He told me a few details and I wondered if he was delusional. So I tried to distract him and said, “Do you remember the trips you used to take us on?” And before I could mention some of the places, he interrupted and seemed put off with me. He said, “I know, I know…but those were REAL trips. I’m talking about the trips I take in my mind….imaginary trips.”
Dementia is a wild ride. I don’t claim to understand much of it and it is very humiliating and scary to lose your mind…I have seen that first hand with my dad.
I’m sure I’ll give updates from time to time, but I don’t want to grind this into the ground each day. I want to move on now to somewhat of a normal existence again. Having the quiet time to write this out and express some of how things are going will help me to be able to do that…I hope.
Admitting Day Topic: People/Family stories If you drop by today, please pray for my family. We are admitting my father into a full time nursing care facility today. I can't imagine the emotions that will go through us today, not to even mention my dads emotions.
More later, but I wanted to get this up so you could pray....God works through prayer and I appreciate it.
Global Day of Prayer, 2006 Topic: Prayer Today is the Global Day of Prayer.(Here is their Purpose and statement of faith.) It is Pentecost, the feast of first fruits….and now a celebration of the day that God sent His Holy Spirit to indwell every believer.
Our church had a very special service. We read parts of the following prayer, which was put together by the organizers of this day of prayer. In between the readings and responses, we sang prayers, we celebrated the baptism of several new believers (hearing the testimony of one of our youth who was being baptized), we had a chorus of 8 different languages spoken in our congregation saying the Lord’s Prayer in their language all together (a picture of what happened on the first Christian Pentecost), we shared communion and we prayed for each other.
*Almighty God – Father, Son and Holy Spirit As a united worldwide body of believers, we are gathered today To honor and glorify Your Name. We bow before Your throne of grace And acknowledge that You are the Creator of heaven and earth. You have existed through all eternity and in You all things hold together. There is no one like You, holy and righteous in all Your ways. We submit to Your authority and sovereignty as the King of the universe And pray with one voice to enthrone You in our hearts And to honor You before the world.
Congregation: Lord God, You alone are worthy Of our praise and adoration. We worship You.
*Our Father in heaven, Thank You for loving the world so greatly That You gave Your only Son, Jesus Christ, To die on the cross for our sins, so that we could be reconciled to You. Thank You for giving us the right to call You Father, Because of our faith in Jesus Christ as our Savior. Nothing, not even principalities and powers, Is able to separate us from Your love which you demonstrated in Your Son, Jesus Christ.
Congregation:Thank You Father, for adopting us into Your family. We now cry, Abba Father!
*Lord Jesus Christ, You alone are worthy to open the scrolls of history, For You were slain and have redeemed us to the Father by Your blood. Thank You for interceding for us as our High Priest. As we stand before You from many tribes and nations, we confess that You are Head of the Church and Lord of every created thing in heaven and on earth. Come and draw followers to serve Your from every tribe and language. May these become Your inheritance in all the earth. Let Your kingdom be established in every nation of the world, So that governments will rule with righteousness and justice. May Your gospel be made known to every person on earth. May Your blessing bring transformation among every people. And may Your Name be great, from the rising of the sun to its setting.
Congregation: Jesus Christ, You are the Savior of the world and the Lord of all.
*Father of mercy and grace We acknowledge that we have sinned and that our world is gripped by the power of sin. Our hearts are grieved by injustice, hatred, anger and violence. We are shamed by the oppression, racism and bloodshed in our land. We weep because of the loss of innocent life in war and terrorism, abortion, persecution and senseless murders. Our hearts are broken by every rejection of Christ as Lord and Savior. As we stand before You, we know that Your gaze beholds all things. Our homes are broken by selfishness and immortality. Our lives are polluted by greed, idolatry and sexual sin. Our churches are divided by rebellious pride. All the sins that we may find in our world, You have found among Your people. We have grieved Your heart and brought shame to Your Name. We approach Your throne of grace in this hour of need. We ask for Your mercy and Your help to repent sincerely.
Congregation: God of mercy, pour out Your grace. Forgive our sins. Heal our land.
*Spirit of the living God, we confess that we can do nothing apart from You. Living God, on this Pentecost, pour out Your Spirit upon all flesh. Empower the Church to be transformed into the image of Jesus Christ. Release Your power to bring healing to the sick, freedom to the possessed, comfort to those who mourn and release for those who are oppressed. Come and melt the hearts of people to love again. Answer the call of the homeless, the hungry, the helpless and the dying. Enfold orphans, widows and the elderly in Your arms. Display Your mercy and provide for our needs. Give us wisdom and insight in every sphere of life so that we will find solutions to the complex problems of the world. Help us to use the resources of the earth for the well-being of all. Pour Your love into our hearts and fill us with compassion and let the power of the Holy Spirit characterize our lives.
Congregation: Holy Spirit, we need Your comfort and guidance. Come and transform our hearts.
*Lord Jesus Christ, because You were dead, but are now risen; and because the Father has given You a Name above all names, You will defeat all powers of evil. You have declared that the gates of hell will not prevail against Your Church. We pray for deliverance from demonic oppression. We pray for the tearing down of the strongholds and ideologies that hinder and resist the spreading of the knowledge of God. We resist the plan of the enemy to keep nations in darkness and pray that Your will remove the veil that covers the peoples. We ask for open doors so that the gospel can enter every nation. Restrain the evil that promotes violence and death. Break the hold of slavery, tyranny and disease. Fill us with courage to preach Your word fearlessly and faithfully. Give us a spirit of intercession to cry out on behalf of the lost.
Congregation: Almighty God, deliver us from evil and the evil one.
*King of Glory, come to the nations of the world. You have promised long ago that You would come to restore all things. We welcome You to finish Your work in our cities, our peoples and our nations. We now lift our voices in unison with believers from across the face of the earth – from Africa, from the Middle East, from North and South America, from Asia, from Europe, from Australia, and from the Pacific Islands – together we cry:
Congregation: Lift up your heads, O you gates! Be lifted up ancient doors so that the King of glory may come in!
As Your deeds increase throughout the earth, and as Your blessings abound to all the nations, they will seek You, asking, “Who is this King of Glory?” Together we will answer:
Congregation: He is the Lord Almighty! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord!
Come fill the earth with Your glory as the waters cover the sea. The Spirit and the Bride say:
Congregation: Amen! Come Lord Jesus!
Now is the season of blessing….reaching out and watching God bless our communities and nations through us as we’ve prepared to be His instruments.
Read about how the Dallas area is preparing for The 90 days of blessing. And I encourage you to look for the ways that God wants you to be a blessing to your neighborhood, community, city and nation. Think of one thing….and do it for God’s glory, because He loves your community….and you are His hands and feet…..
Constant prayer, day 10 Topic: Prayer Today's emphasis for the Ten Days of Constant Prayer is God's blessing.
For the promised blessing of Christ among all people.
For His Church: *For Christians to live with expectancy for the ancient promise of blessing to be fulfilled, seeing transformation of their communities and countries. *For churches to work together in unity, co-working with God to change lives, cities and nations.
For our world: *For the righteousness and justice of God to transform the ways of commerce and politics, cleansing whole societies from the curse of corruption. *For the peace of Christ's kingdon to change the way cities and nations are governed. *For the joy of Christ's life to flourish throughout every people group on earth!
***I am particularly interested in this way of praying for God's blessing, as I went to a mini conference on it back in April. In 2 weeks, Charles and I are going to a prayer conference where this same speaker will be teaching again. I will report on it after we go.
Today is the last day of the Ten Days of Constant Prayer. Our church is doing a 24 hour prayer 'marathon' with people praying around the clock from sundown on Friday evening til sundown on Saturday evening. Tomorrow is Pentecost, originally a Jewish holy day designed to give to God the first 'fruits' of the first harvest of produce. Today, as Chrisitans, we can see how God also produced on that first Pentecost after Jesus died and rose again, the first harvest of Christians worldwide. He sent the Holy Spirit to indwell all who give their lives to Him. The Holy Spirit prompted the disciples to preach the good news of Jesus to those who were gathered in Jerusalem for Pentecost, bringing their first fruits. Each of these people groups heard the message in their own language and God reaped a powerful harvest of believers from all over the known world, who then went back to further spread the gospel.
Tomorrow, you can check out all that is happening with the Global Day of Prayer U.S. and all of the world.
Our church is studying/using the guide for the Ten Days of Constant Prayer in preparation for Pentecost Sunday, which is in 2 days!
Today's prayer emphasis:
For Christ to bring substantial healing.
In His Church: *That God would move amoung the sick around the world to bring physical healing. Acts 5:14-16 *That Christians would act withpersistet compassion to work for the eradication of diseases. *For Christians to be engaged in providing basic health care where needs are great.
In the world: *For the END of HIV/AIDS in OUR generation. (wouldn't that be awesome? Our God IS an awesome God...please pray about this horrific epidemic) At this time 250,000 young people are infected every month. *For basic health care for the most needy of our world. Over 30,000 children worldwide die daily from preventable diseases!
I am praying specifically today for some people I know in our church and community with serious illnesses...and for my father, who is suffering greatly with dementia. I think the ultimate healing for him would be to go to be with the Lord....and I would never say that lightly.
Constant Prayer, Day 8 Topic: Prayer Today in the prayer guide for the 10 Days of Constant Prayer before Pentecost Sunday, we are encouraged to pray for the glory of Jesus.
For Christ's glory to be revealed in the courage of His people.
For His Church: *For those who come up against oppostion because of the name of Jesus....that they would display the gentle, bold character of Jesus. (Acts 4:13) *For Christians who suffer for Christ's name to be strong in joy and faith. *That God will be glorified by His great deeds in those places where He has been opposed. (Acts 4:21)
For Our World: *For our leaders and governments to be blessed. *That some government leaders who are opposing Christ would be blessed with wisdom and be found "not fighting against God." (Acts 5:39)
Stow it Topic: People/Family stories I am so unorganized, and such a procrastinator, it is really a problem for me. When I can't get motivated to get something done, but it is important enough for me to keep, I stow it.
I started stowing my childrens' keepsakes long ago, when my oldest (who is 18) was in kindergarten. She brought home the cutest, dearest things.....handprints, essays with pictures, polaroid photos on special days, awards, and crafts. My refrigerator door was overloaded with cute stuff. I had a pile of things on my dresser that stayed there for a year or more, not knowing what to do with it. One day, I decided I would just take a paper grocery sack and load all of the cute stuff I couldn't throw away into it and keep it on my closet shelf. Then each time she or one of the other girls (who eventually had their own sacks) would bring home something dear or cute or historical in some way to their small lives, I would slip it into the sack. These sacks are folded, as to not take up so much space. Keeping them folded also protects these cute artifacts from dust...mostly. So at the end of my closet shelf, through 2 moves so far, there sits the sacks.
We take them down once in a while to wander through them. I did this the other day. I actually found the sacks in a box that had not yet been unpacked from our recent move and I took them to my closet. But before I put them up there, I had to go through them. I actually was just going to go through Emma's sack, because I have LOST her immunization records and she needs them to go to high school this Fall. (I did not find them and I am hoping this will not be too much of a problem....????) So I went through Emma's sack. Her little blankie (the 'gee gee') was in there and she saw it and carried it around the rest of the day. I found it once again back in the sack at the end of the day....she said it didn't smell the same anymore. lol
I don't know what I will do with the sacks once they are grown and I don't have cute things to put in there anymore. I have never done anything with these things....no scrapbook, no pretty box or preservation of any kind. But the sacks have become a sort of artifact in themselves and we like them now just the way they are.....brittle as they may be.
I do a similar thing with recipes that I collect from magazines and friends. I have an accordian file folder that I neatly labeled one day....one amazingly organizational day....but I don't always have time to file the recipes. So I slip the recipes that are new into a pocket in the back of the accordian file and keep them there, waiting to be filed...which I do about once a year.
Both of these stow away ideas keep me from having piles of things everywhere. And I know right where to find all the recipes I've cut out over the year, instead of losing them.
Constant Prayer, Day 7 Topic: Prayer Today is day seven of the 10 Days of Constant Prayer for our communities. Today the emphasis is praying for the nations to hear the voice of God.
This includes: *The gospel preached in every language. *The Bible translated into more languages. Currently there are 3,000 known people groups without Scripture in their own language. *Churches to be planted around the world, in every culture/language group. *That many (Acts 2:39) would call on the name of the Lord and be saved. (Acts 2:21)
I forgot to copy down yesterday's prayer emphasis, but you can still pray for this very important one:
Day 6 The Coming Generation:
*For marriages and homes to be strengthened in Christ. *For children and youth to become devoted to following Christ early in life and to serve Him with extreme devotion! *That young leaders will be recognized and released to lead the church to grow in multiplying ways. (Acts 6:3-7)
Global prayer Topic: Prayer
I meant to write about this over a week ago. But my mind went into neutral with the busyness that surrounded my week last week and the thought that my dad would be placed in a nursing care facility, I thought by today. As of this morning, that is not a possibility...problems with the insurance approval and beds available. I have to snap out of this fog, I've decided. So I 'm just going to start putting some things out on here that I've been pushing aside, as to not to have to think.
We are in the middle of the 10 days of constant prayer. Read about it to find out more. Very simply, this is patterned after what happened at that first Christian Pentecost in the book of Acts. Jesus ascended into Heaven, leaving them with a promise of the Holy Spirit. For 10 days they were together, praying continually, until the day of Pentecost when they received the Holy Spirit. Then for 90 days they reached out to their community and thousands understood their message, were saved and the church grew and spread. So for 10 days, currently we are on day 6, we are encouraged to pray in groups, alone, fast and they have a prayer guide on their sight to guide you. Then this Sunday is the Global DAY of prayer, all believers who are participating, praying in one accord for God to work in their communities. Then for 90 days, churches are to reach out to the community, to be a blessing to them and watch God work.
I think it is a wonderfully organized effort. I have not heard much of it except through our church. I hope they continue to grow and do this each year so that more churches can participate and a more concerted effort will be in place. I can't wait to see what God will do through these that are praying. I have slacked this week through my own numbness due to my little life struggles. But I am committing right now to start in....day 6 though it may be....and join the effort. I will hopefully be able to post some more resources for this prayer effort later today. Right now I am being urgently summoned to get my 16 year old daughter to work!
Day by Day Topic: God things Day by Day Words: Kar-o-lina W. San-dell-Berg, 1865 trans-lat-ed from Swed-ish to Eng-lish by An-drew L. Skoog (1856-1934). Music: “Blott en Dag,” Os-kar Ahn-felt, 1872 Listen here
Day by day, and with each passing moment, Strength I find, to meet my trials here; Trusting in my Father’s wise bestowment, I’ve no cause for worry or for fear. He Whose heart is kind beyond all measure Gives unto each day what He deems best— Lovingly, its part of pain and pleasure, Mingling toil with peace and rest.
Every day, the Lord Himself is near me With a special mercy for each hour; All my cares He fain would bear, and cheer me, He Whose Name is Counselor and Power; The protection of His child and treasure Is a charge that on Himself He laid; “As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,” This the pledge to me He made.
Help me then in every tribulation So to trust Thy promises, O Lord, That I lose not faith’s sweet consolation Offered me within Thy holy Word. Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting, Ever to take, as from a father’s hand, One by one, the days, the moments fleeting, Till I reach the promised land.
Cook/freeze once, then stir in all month INTRO: OK, I'm giving in and joining the Works for me Wednesday craze over at Rocks in My Dryer. At first, I wasn't sure I could offer a helpful hint EVERY week because I don't think I am all that inspiring around the house. However, my first tip will be to make a list on your Stickie Notes with all the hints you can think of, one to be used each week. Now I have a list of a dozen or so ideas to work with each Wednesday.
REAL POST: I love to shop at warehouse stores. I have a Sam's Club card and just this past week, my mom registered us for a Costco card as well! Choices, choices..... And I love to have a well-stocked freezer and pantry. In years past, I would bring home a bulk purchase of ground beef and divide it up, wrap it in foil and label it GB. But for the past few years, I've been doing something ingenious, which I cannot take the credit for. I wish I could remember where I read it, but it's so simple and a real time saver.
When I get my beef home, I usually set aside 2 pounds for a meatloaf, which gets assembled quickly and put into the freezer all ready to pop in the oven. Then I use a huge skillet and cook the rest of the beef (usually 4-6 pounds left after making a meatloaf). I cook it well, then drain off the grease. THEN, to make it even more degreased, rinse the cooked beef in a colander under hot water to remove even more fat. Cool your meat and slip it into large ziplok bags. Lay the bags as flat as you can in the freezer so the meat is in as thin a layer as possible, not in a big lump. Now you can break off as much meat as you need all month to make short work of preparing taco meat, chili, spaghetti sauce, soup or stuffed peppers.
Saves work in the kitchen on days when you don't have a lot of time to spend cooking....and that's often around here!
PS: Here is a bonus picture I found while searching for a graphic for this post. I would make the smashed taters into sheep though and not ghosts. Although they are hilarious! It is too cute not to share!
Italian Meat Pie Topic: Crickl's Recipes The Old Fashioned Pie Auction was a success today. People in the church made pies to auction off to rasie funds for our youth mission trip this summer. They had around 70 pies and made about $5700!! Awesome, huh? A group of our high school youth will be going to Gulf Port, Mississippi to help repair rooves on houses damaged by hurricane Katrina.
I made a really cool Italian Meat Pie I found on allrecipes.com. Here is their recipe. I did not use all the different kinds of meats, but only used Italian sausage. This is a really good recipe and it was pretty easy. I made it in a 10 inch spring form pan. Don't worry if a little egg mixture leaks out while putting the top crust on. It all cooks and looks great too.
The texture and taste are kind of like a quiche with a top crust. Very savory and yummy!
This Is My Father's World Topic: God things
We sang this in church today. It is one of my favorite hymns. I just love nature and being outside. It always draws me to thoughts of God. Psalm 19 talks about this too.....
This Is My Father's World Text: Maltbie D. Babcock Music: Trad. English melody; adapt. by Franklin L. Sheppard
This is my Father's world, and to my listening ears all nature sings, and round me rings the music of the spheres. This is my Father's world: I rest me in the thought of rocks and trees, of skies and seas; his hand the wonders wrought.
This is my Father's world, the birds their carols raise, the morning light, the lily white, declare their maker's praise. This is my Father's world: he shines in all that's fair; in the rustling grass I hear him pass; he speaks to me everywhere.
This is my Father's world. O let me ne'er forget that though the wrong seems oft so strong, God is the ruler yet. This is my Father's world: why should my heart be sad? The Lord is King; let the heavens ring! God reigns; let the earth be glad!
I'm cookin' Topic: Crickl's Recipes I was really in the mood to cook today. It helps get me in the mood when I know company is coming to dinner, and we had some friends from Williams coming.
I put some country beef ribs in the crockpot all day (which is too long because they fell completely apart!), Charles cooked chicken on the grill, I doctored up some canned baked beans, green beans, baked mac and cheese, and buttermilk cornbread.
Tomorrow I have to bake 2 pies for a pie auction fund raiser for youth camp. I'll let you know how that goes.