Motherhood: A chance to die Topic: Holidays/Vacations
Fellow lady blogger, Barbara, at Stray Thoughts had such a wonderful entry for Mother's Day that I am borrowing part of it. She has posted parts of letters written by famous missionaries to their mothers. Go over to Stray Thoughts to read letters by Jim Elliot and Hudson Taylor to their mothers.
What I wanted to post today are letters written by Amy Carmichael and her mother. One of the hardest things I can think of would be to give your child to the Lord in service to Him. Most often, it means they will live far away and we may not see them as much as our hearts desire.
My parents gave me willingly to the Lord when I felt that call at age 16, not knowing that I would live most of my adult life far away. Now that my own daughters are entering young womanhood, I realize what a huge sacrifice that was, and I hope I can open my hand, die to my own desires and say,
"Take her, dear Lord — Thou wilt take the most loving care of her, use her in Thy service and for Thy glory now and where Thou pleasest, for Christ’s sake." ~Catherine Jane Carmichael~
From Amy to her mother:
My Precious Mother,
Have you given your child unreservedly to the Lord for whatever He wills?…
Oh may He strengthen you to say “Yes” to Him if He asks something which costs.
Darling Mother, for a long time as you know the thought of those dying in the dark — 50,000 of them every day, while we at home live in the midst of blazing light — has been very present with me, and the longing to go to them, and tell them of Jesus, has been strong upon me. ..
But home claims seemed to say “Stay”, and I thought it was His Will; it was perhaps til yesterday. I can’t explain it, but lately the need seems to have come closer, and I wrote down a few days ago…why I am not going.
1. Your need of me, my Mother. 2. The great loneliness it would mean to my dear second Father. 3. The thought that by staying I might make it easier for others to go if He called. 4. My not being strong.
But in His sight are these four things worth staying from those poor heathen for? You have given me three-quarters up as it is. My dear old Fatherie is the Lord’s wholly, he would not let me kept out just for him. The other two things surely I could trust about. Still, they seemed to say “Stay”.
Yesterday suddenly the impulse came to have a good talk with my dear Fatherie…and after it I went to my own room and just asked the Lord what it all meant, what did He wish me to do, and, Mother, as clearly as I ever heard you speak, I heard Him say, “GO YE.”
I never heard it just so plainly before.; I cannot be mistaken, for I know He spoke. He says “Go”, I cannot stay.
Mother, I feel as if I had been stabbing someone I loved. It is Friday now, I could not finish this yesterday, and through all the keen sharp pain which has come since Wednesday, the certainty that it was His voice…has never wavered; though all my heart has shrunk from what it means…the certainty is there…nothing but that sure word, His word, could make it possible to do it, for until he spoke, and I answered, “Yes, Lord”, I never knew what it would cost.
These are the verses He gave me…”If any man will come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.” “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it, and whosoever will lose his life for My sake shall find it.” “He that loveth father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me.”
“To obey is better than sacrifice.”
Many difficulties have risen in my mind, they seem very great, the “crooked places” seem very crooked, but it seems to me that all He asks is that we should take the one step He shows us, and in simplest, most practical trust leave all results to Him.
Mother, I know that very few of our friends will think I am right. Those who don’t know the Shepherd’s Voice themselves will be quite sure I am very wrong and mistaken, but He has said, “Walk before Me, and be thou perfect.” He knows, and He won’t let me disnonour Him by making a mistake and following my own fancy instead of Him. If it is so, He will show it to me, but if it is His Will, I must do it. There isn’t much of gladness in this letter, I’m afraid, but I don’t feel anything except sore at the pain this must bring to my loved ones.
Good-bye, my Mother. May He come very near to you and strengthen and comfort you.
Your Own Amy
P.S. Some of these things may cross your mind as they have mine.
What about leaving my God-given Father who does seem to need me a little? Cannot I trust Him to care for him? If He tells me to leave him, He won’t let him suffer. Clara Bradshaw met Hudson Taylor once, and he prayed, “Show this child of thine what blessing she is keeping from her own father” — by staying when He had called her.
If I stayed, might I not keep those dearest to me from God’s richest blessing? But this is a very hard bit to think of, I can hardly face it steadily yet.
“Health” you will think of. He won’t let that hinder if He has said, “Go”. Then as to the money — I don’t see clearly, but I believe He will show us about that. If He does not, I will take it that that means “stay”, for He could not mean me to let you suffer wrongly. But I think soon the boys will be able to help.
To Amy from her mother, Catherine:
My Own Precious Child, He Who hath led will lead All through the wilderness, He Who hath fed will surely feed… He Who hath heard thy cry Will never close His ear, He Who hath marked Thy faintest sigh Will not forget thy tear. He loveth always, faileth never, So rest on Him today — for ever.
Yes, dearest Amy, He has lent you to me all these years. He only knows what a strength, comfort and joy you have been to me. In sorrow He made you my staff and solace, in loneliness my more than child companion, and in gladness my bright and merry-hearted sympathizer. So, darling, when He asks you now to go away from within my reach, can I say nay? No, no, Amy, He is yours — you are His — to take you where He pleases and to use you as He pleases. I can trust you to Him, and I do — and I thank Him for letting you hear His voice as you have done. I shall not speak of your dear loving letter or my feelings. How weak we are. But He knows our frame, and remembers. “Go ye” — my heart echoes. “Oh send forth Thy light and Thy truth, let them lead me — let them bring me into Thy holy hill and to Thy tabernacles”, met my eye as I opened my Bible — do you see what the holy hill and tabernacles meant to me in this connection? I never saw it before — and then in the next page comes, “Therefore God has blessed thee for ever.” All day He has helped me, and my heart unfailingly says, “Go ye.” He only knows what this means and will mean to me — to you — to us all. I dare not think — but His grace is sufficient, Amy. Let us keep our eye on Him — and then no wave will swamp us — and He will bear us up in His arms. Oh, isn’t is strange we are not more cheerfully willing followers — to think of His wonderful everlasting love to us, and how little He ever asks in return. Amy, darling, today I got a moment’s glimpse of it all, and how small this life seemed. When we are dying, how very little will it seem that He has asked us to give up for Him. So, my precious Child, I give you back into His loving arms, saying from the depths of my being, “Take her, dear Lord — Thou wilt take the most loving care of her, use her in Thy service and for Thy glory now and where Thou pleasest, for Christ’s sake. Amen.”
For dear Mr. Wilson I feel so much, perhaps more than for myself, but God has his happiness in His keeping. He cannot and will not make a mistake. All other points are minor and must wait — the one thought has been enough today. One step is all that I am equal to — all else will be clear. “The Lord is mt Shepherd, I shall not want.” “Goodness and mercy shall follow me” — and those who trust — “all the days of my life”, and we shall all gather from the north, south, east and west in His home above, and will cast our crowns at His feet, saying “Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power and riches and wisdom and strength and honour and glory and blessing.” Til then may we each one be found faithful.
Ever my darling child’s loving Mother.
For days, it seems to me now, the Lord has been preparing the way, Amy, for your letter.
From Amy Carmichael of Dohnavur by Frank Houghton
You can read more about Amy Carmichael’s mother here
Territorial turtle's tendency toward terrorizing tats cats Topic: Humor/memes
Here is a video for your Saturday viewing. You just have to watch it to believe it.....a high speed guard turtle. Look at his chomping action when there is a shot of the turtle coming directly toward the camera.
Wordless Wednesday: A path less traveled Topic: Photo entries
Thank you all for the nice comments about this photo. Since many of you asked about where it is, here is the explanation. We were staying in Creede, Colorado and one day took a dirt road that turned off the 2 lane highway. It went up the mountain (we were down on that road that runs along the valley below in the pic). Then at the top of the mountain, there was a hiking trail that took off over the top, so we went walking. This is where the trail lead. And that is the Rio Grande river running through the valley too. The headwaters for the Rio Grande are in these mountains.
Hanging by a thread Topic: People/Family stories
I went with my husband this morning to make 2 hospital visits. We did end up making 2 visits, but one was not in the original plan. While doing an errand this morning, we found out that one of our high school girls from church was in a car accident about an hour earlier on her way to school. She turned left onto a busy street and was T-boned on the driver's side of her car. With no seat belt on, she is so, so, so blessed to have only a chipped vertebrae in her neck and a hip fracture. She was hit just behind the driver's seat, ejected out her open window and onto the on-coming car, rolling off into the street. Our all consuming thought was: she is the same age as our daughter, who drives to school and turns onto a very busy street every morning. Thank you, gracious Lord, that she is alive. It could have easily been a very different kind of visit we had to make.
For the rest of my life, I will remember the look on her mother's face when we came into the emergency room. She had obviously been crying her eyes out, had just stepped out of bed and into her car to rush to the hospital, waking up to that dreadful phone call...."Your daughter has been in an accident....."
In all seriousness, I think having driving teenagers immediately transforms a luke-warm prayer life into an active, fervent one.
Kelly will be fine after a few months of recuperating. She is in a lot of pain (please pray for her), but is making jokes with her sister and telling her mom about the laundry she left in the washing machine. She also asked her to see if she can reschedule the test she was supposed to have taken this morning at school. My daughters and the other youth from church we have talked to are very sobered by it all.
It is amazing how fragile our lives are. We all hang by a thread between inhabiting these earthly bodies and standing in the presence of God. We are sobered for good reason. Every day we all pull out into traffic, every day we are a heartbeat away from eternity.
Kinda makes you want to close this computer and go hug your kids, doesn't it?
G'night....and God bless you and yours. Hold them near and dear!
Sunday night hockey Topic: Photo entries
I spent a long time today trying to find and apply the codes for thumbnail links to images. But I found it! And it's easy...you'll probably be seeing a lot more of it here, since it doesn't take up my disk space. If you want the code, just hollar at me....uh, or comment or email. =)
Here is what my 2 teenagers and my husband have been doing the past 2 months of Sunday nights. Just click on the little image to see the larger one.
This is our youth room. It is a huge room that they made over to be a hockey rink. Each team has a t-shirt design and banner on the wall. Their goalie masks decorate the end walls too. The bumper walls along the sides are covered with carpeting and the spectators sit on them to watch....or some chickens like me peek in from the doorways to avoid the little rubber balls that come flying.
Very cool logo! It stands for Revolution, the name of our youth ministry.
When Josh (youth pastor) has a game to play, my husband fills in as referree. Isn't he cute? =) The toilet paper decor all around the room is from the current TP wars that the youth group plays on Wednesday nights. ;)
Each game begins with a devotion by one of the youth and a prayer huddle.
To change the world.... Topic: People/Family stories Today I was reading the blog of a person who is upset with the injustices of our world (no arguement....there are many)...and our country in particular. So what is our response? Can we make a difference or would it be a futile attempt, like a trying to count the sand on a beach or trying to drink the ocean?
How would you change the world if it were up to you.....in a realistic or attainable way?
I hate to tell you my answer....because I do not think it is possible. I know how it ends....or should I say how it really starts to Begin for us. I've read the Book.
It's encouraging to know that some Day the striving against evil will be over, but for now we live here on planet Earth. And it is not a pretty sight as far as justice and truth. And I am no crusader for world change or lobbyist for justice.
Here is what I left as a comment on that blog:
Oh my....erm, I'm sorry? ;) I'm not really mocking you, I just never know what to say when you rant. =)
Praying for you and your finals and stuff!! I love you.....and although the world is not an example of human compassion and it is so very hard to think about how change could ever happen, YOU can be (compassionate) and I know you will make a huge difference in numerous lives over the course of yours. And that is GREATNESS chicky."
A lot of you know I'm talking about my daughter's blog. She is a social work major and is constantly (!) confronted with all manner of societal injustice and she is processing it. It is the kind of blog post that she will probably erase tomorrow, but I hope she doesn't. It's true. And it is informative...and hopefully it will be inspiring to many to put on our compassion and parade it around. We CAN make a difference in many, many lives. We should never give up. We should stay informed and righteously angry and actively pursuing justice in our nation.
But here is my thought (my realistic, practical and attainable thought)...... it is in the day to day contact we have with real live people that will make the greatest impact. I may not have the opportunity to change the world, but I do have countless opportunities every day to show compassion, mercy, grace...oh and don't forget "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control."
Tonight I was at Walmart doing some shopping. Why is it that they always have a gazillion checkout stations, but only a few open at any given time? Even when there are 5-6 customers with baskets loaded with groceries waiting and waiting? Whoops, sidetracked...here we go back again: The checkout girl in charge of our lane looked nervous and frustrated. The woman 2 people ahead of me had scads of little children's clothing and each piece had to be scanned. Some were on sale and she had to type in the special numbers. It took FOR EVER....and I said so to my daughter Emma, as we stood in line, examining all the new chewing gum flavors.
I made eye contact with the checker one time and I think I was either sighing visibly or rolling my eyes, because it was conveyed to her that I was annoyed. It showed in her face....it gave her discouragement....what a gift. That second of eye contact did something to my heart though....it softened, it pulled me into check. She was doing her best to keep things moving, she was embarrassed and sorry. I suddenly felt like a real jerk (for good reason), dropped my glance, and gave myself a little talking to. I determined I would show this girl some compassion and let her know it was okay and that she was doing just fine. (and all this was before reading that blog post.....gotta be a God thing)
Next in line was a quiet but aggrivated woman. She showed her frustration very passively, yet as clearly as if she had said it verbally. There was mome confusion and frustration for the checker when a gift card the woman was trying to use was not going through on the computer and a manager had to be called over. Her face got beet red. She looked at the woman and said she was so sorry it was taking so long. To which the woman only responded with silence....very loud silence. She looked at me and appologized. So I seized my opportunity and smiled at her....genuinely this time...and said it was okay. It's funny how deciding and taking action to show compassion actually stirs it in your spirit, and it did. I wanted to help her in some way or take her on break and buy her a coke or at least give her a hug...when a few minutes before I was rolling my eyes at her.
My order went through quickly and she beat me to the "have a wonderful evening" part. I think she meant it. I think just a smile and friendly countenance did wonders for her spirit, as well as mine. And I thought to myself on the way out....why can't I do that for more people I run across every day? It would really encourage people and I feel better too. Face it, when you act like a jerk, you feel like one too. When you act compassionate, you become compassionate.
It's kind of along the 'pay it forward' idea. Show kindness, have some compassion and understanding.
It goes a long way in today's fast paced, agressive, cold world. People are craving it.
Warm afternoons Topic: People/Family stories This afternoon's temperature: 97?. Time spent standing out on the playground watching children play: 1 1/2 hours. It was a good day though (didn't have to blow my whistle once), after a rough one yesterday. My temporary crown fell off yesterday while I was at work, then I had a run in with one of the kids, who I had to do a 'write up' on and then talk with a parent....not fun, very stressful. I was bummed.
Because of the heat lately (which is here to stay now and will only get worse in Phoenix), we walk around the playground misting kids with garden spray bottles. Well, I should say, we mist some of the children. For others, we set the bottle on the long, streaming setting and pummel them. It's fun because they do not have spray bottles and we do. >=) If they had spray bottles too, it would not be fun. (and I hope they never get a hold of one while I'm out there)
We have the same kind of bottles for cleaning in the room....but they have different labels. The bottles for cleaning say: BLEACH in huge letters. The bottles for spraying kids say: CHILDREN. When we broke out the spray bottles on Wednesday, the kids kept asking, "Are those the bleach bottles?" It was so tempting to look at the bottle after spraying them in the face and gasp, "OH NO......it's BLEACH!!" heehee
But I didn't! A few of the older ones tried to scare us though, by yelling, as if they were in pain, after we squirted them in the face. =) I am humbled (quite well) by the fact that the middle school kids have the same sense of humor as I do.....*ahem*
Heard on the playground today.... Topic: Humor/memes I've been working, doing after school care at a local school here for about a month. Today I was out on the playground helping some kindergarten boys with their paper airplanes. I didn't know how to fold them and they were waiting for one of the other teachers to come out. So we were shootin' the breeze, chatting, when one of them looks up at me suddenly, as if a thought had just occurred to him,
"Are you a grown up?" he said.
"Yes, I am" I smirked....
"You're not a teenager?" said the other one.
"Nope, but I'm the mom of 3 teenagers."
They about fell off of their bench with amazement.
It's time Topic: God things
On Sunday, my husband was preaching and said the church's goal should be......to be utterly at the disposal of God, consumed, taken over by God's Spirit, so that all men may know Him.
"The time has come," he said. "The kingdom of God is near. Repent and believe the good news!" Mark 1:15
The time has come people....do you believe it?
Or are you weighed down by every day things, like I have been?
I have seen some who are consumed and utterly at the disposal of God. It is a powerful thing to be consumed by freedom like that. We tend to think we are free if we can do what WE want to do. True freedom is in being able to give your life away....to die to yourself....to be totally at the disposal of the God who is waiting to make you who He created you to be. Doing what we want to do is bondage to selfishness and vain striving.
We get to see people like that at least once a month in our church. The ministry we sponsor called Set Free was in our services Sunday and it is always amazing, uplifting and inspiring to see these men. They once were consumed with addictions or hatred and now are utterly consumed by God's Spirit. They have such a love for each other as I've not seen in a long, long time. It makes the hearts of our church more tender the more they are around these men. Maybe some day we will actually get it....
This life is not about us....it's about God. His kingdom is near.... as my friend Joann says,
"Man up!" (have some integrity, follow through) let's do this thing....
On conferences and company Topic: Crickl's Recipes
It's been a fly by week for me. Things to blog about go through my head during the day but when I sit down here to write, nuttin....
We had our denomination's state women's conference today and last night, so it was a good couple of days. Mary Kassian was the main speaker and is a really great Bible teacher. I was a little comfuddled this year about the schedule of the conference. It was changed all around, so I only go to go to 3 break out sessions, instead of 5. This morning I went to a lovely breakfast for the state pastor's wives, then to one on party ideas, and finally to one on writing. I don't know what I wanted or will use from that class on writing, but I am tucking it away for future reference and gathered some good ideas.
I wish I could have stayed for the last main session, but I had things at home to catch up on. We have company coming tomorrow, so I stopped by the store. When I walked in the door, the smell of floor cleaner in the air put a smile on my face and as I looked around at my clean house, I felt a heavy load release from my shoulders. My husband and kids had the house all ready for company. All I have to do is cook.
I got a brisket from Smart and Final which I will put in the electric roaster in the morning with some Claude's Texas Brisket Marinade over it. (it makes it taste like it was cooked in a wood smoker) And I'm making a salad, oven roasted zucchini, mashed potato casserole, rolls and a pomegrante/cranberry coffee cake (from Smart and Final) with fruit salad for dessert.
Oven roasted Zucchini Here is my 'how-to', but it is not a precise recipe. Wash zucchini squash and cut off the ends. Slice in diagonal chunks or slice lengthwise. Cut an onion (your choice, I use a sweet onion) into wedges. In large bowl, toss squash and onions with enough olive oil to coat, but not enough to leave a puddle in the bowl. Dump it all onto a baking sheet (or baking stone if you have one) and sprinkle with kosher salt or sea salt, grated parmessan cheese and coarse ground black pepper. Bake at 450 for 20 minutes, then stir and bake another 5 minutes.
Mashed Potato Casserole Cook enough potatoes for your family or company, then mash, using half a stick of butter and a little bit of milk. (go easy on the milk) Add salt and pepper to taste. Then add a half a block (4 oz) of cream cheese, about 1/4 cup of pureed onion (slice fresh onion and put in food processor or blender for a few seconds...you may need to add a few drops of water to get a good puree), and enough sour cream to make it the right consistency....good and creamy. You can make this ahead of time and put it in the refrigerator or freeze an extra casserole of it for another day. You can also top it with Durkee French Fried Onions. Bake for about 30 minutes at 350.
Oh and ps to MJ....please send me your new email address! crickandchas@yahoo.com
New fangled things Topic: Humor/memes
I got this video clip over at Amy's blog, With Purpose. It is hilarious and it makes me dread teaching my mom how to use a new laptop. She is threatening planning on getting one in the Fall, but has never used a computer....ever...before. *oiy with the poodles already!*
This poor monk is learning to use a new invention, the 'book', after only using scrolls. Watch it:
The A-list Topic: Blogging To the 20 people who read my blog each day.....5 of whom come here as the result of googling topics that I have on my blog....you may or may not be surprised to know the I am an A-lister bloglebrity. (Bloglebrity=blog+celebrity)
Heehee...the criteria for being a celebrity blogger is based solely on how many blogs link to yours. And since I joined several blog rolls, my blog is linked on a lot of different womens' and Christian blogs who are on those same blog rolls. Oh well....a little "pink bling" as Iris, at Sing My Heart called it is good for a girl's soul. =) So I went to Kneda's blog to find out how my blog was rated. Here is my rating:
***The Very High Authority Group [A-List Bloggers] (500 or more blogs linking in the last 6 months) In the final group we see what might be considered the blogging elite. This group, which represents more than 4,000 blogs, exhibits a radical shift in post frequency as well as blog age. Bloggers of this type have been at it longer – a year and a half on average – and post nearly twice a day, an increase in posting volume of over 100% from the previous group. Many of the blogs in this category, in fact, are about as old as Technorati and we’ve grown up together. Some of these are full-fledge professional enterprises that post many, many times per day and behave increasingly like our friends in the mainstream media. As has been widely reported, the impact of these bloggers on our cultures and democracies is increasingly dramatic.***
I might begin to get a big head if it weren't for my actual sitemeter counts that show my faithful 15. ;)
Friday's Feast #139 Topic: Humor/memes Appetizer When you were a child, which crayon color was your favorite? We didn't have very interesting color names in the ...er, generation I grew up in....but Sky blue was pretty cool. Burnt orange was thought provoking, but not a very useful color.
Soup On a scale of 1 to 10 (with 10 being highest), how likely would you be to change jobs if it required you to move? I like changes, but we just made a huge one, so I'm not quite ready for that again! Besides, interstate negotiating of playground monitor jobs is a little silly to think about.
Yep, I began a job at a local school here helping with an after school program...your basic playground monitor really.
Salad Take all the numbers in your birthday and your phone number and add them up, one by one. What’s the total? 67, unless you're calling long distance, then add one. Is this how you find your 'sleep number'?
Main Course Have you ever “re-gifted” anything? If so, what was it and who did you pass it on to? Almost every knick knack I've ever received has been regifted and passed on. And if you know me, you may have received one. heehee
Dessert Name something you need from the store. Are you going? Please....if you're going by Sam's Club, pick me up some Naked Juice=Blue Machine, a bag of gala apples and a big barrel of sourdough pretzels....oh, and Emma's pictures from the film processing department and her new contacts from optical. Thanks!