Drollery  

by Madame Estrella

"Hello?"  Angela answered groggily, picking up the phone on the third ring.

"Hey sweet thing, what's shakin'?"

"You woke me up for this?  Who the hell is this?"  She asked, huffing.

"It's the man of your dreams, baby."

"Santa Claus?  When are you going to bring me that Barbie?"

"This aint Santa Claus.  I could be your Merry Maker, though."

Angela hung up the phone and looked down at the Biology text she'd fallen asleep in.  She got up and walked over to the mirror and saw that she'd slept on her green highlighter as well.  She washed her face in the sink and sat back down on the bed.  The phone rang again.

"Hello?"  She said, more alert this time.

"No woman hangs up on the Love Machine like that!"

"Try me."  She said before slamming the phone back down.  She turned on the radio and looked at the book again.  She was angry now.  She picked it up in her hands and slammed it shut.  She opened and slammed it twice more before sending it sailing across the room.  The phone rang a third time.

"What's the matter, asshole?  Are you too ugly to get a date?"  She shouted.

"Angela?  This is mom."

"Oh, God!  Mom, I'm so sorry!  It's just that this guy has been prank calling me."

"Really?  Well, can you do something about it?"

"Not really.  I can scream in his ear and hope to deafen the creep."

"Well, I was calling to see if you were coming home this weekend."

"Sure, I wouldn't miss it for the world!"  Her little sister was in a school play on Saturday.

"That's great, sweetheart.  Just give me a call when you leave so I know when to expect you."

"Ok, I love you mom.  Bye!"

"Bye, dear."

She hung up the phone and walked over to the counter to grab a bag of potato chips.  She was sure that this class had caused her to gain ten pounds.  The phone rang again and she let it go a couple of times before picking it up.

"Hello?"  She said.

"Hey, what's up?  Is Jamal there?"

"Jamal?  No, I'm afraid you've got the wrong number."

"Oh, sorry."

She hung up the phone, turned off the radio and turned on the television.  She started watching that Scream movie and nearly jumped when the phone rang again.

"Hello?"  She asked.

"Hi, I think you look awesome in your underwear."

Angela made a fist and hit her seat.  She'd wasted her best line on her mother and now this jerk was calling her back.

"Well, sugar, I'll tell you what.  Maybe I'll show it to you if you come down right now and knock four times on my door."

She chuckled to herself as she hung the phone up.  This was just some idiot who'd picked her number out of thin air and kept calling her because he got a rise out of her.  She then heard someone knock on the door of her dorm room four times.  The phone rang again.  She cautiously answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby!  I'm here!"  She heard a couple of people scream outside her door.  She looked out through the peep hole and saw a bunch of guys standing there holding a cordless phone up and laughing.

She reached down and clicked the phone line out of its wall outlet.  She'd let voice mail pick up for the rest of the night.  She walked over and opened her door.

"Yes?  You boys want something?"  She asked the guys from down the hall.

"Yeah, we thought that maybe you'd be interested in playing cards or something?"

"Okay."  Angela said walking out and locking her door.