Chapter 7

Memories

After dinner, they had all arrived back at their houses at nine o'clock. Coreene had decided to stay with Brandon so Cassandra went over to the guys' house. Mercedes went into the kitchen and started to put the dishes, that were rapidly piling up in the sink, in the dishwasher, and Nicole and Jonathan went into the living room to watch television.

"Do you guys need any help?" Cassandra said to Mercedes and Brian, who had now started helping with the dishes.

"Oh, no," said Mercedes. "You look tired. Why don't you go up to bed?"

"You sure?"

"Yeah," said Brian. "We'll be okay."

Cassandra quickly smiled at them and ran upstairs to Nick's room.

A little while later, Mercedes stopped Brian in the kitchen. "I'm going to go to bed, Honey," Mercedes said to Brian.

"Okay," Brian said. "I'll be up in a while." He gave her a quick kiss and she ran upstairs.

Nick, Isabella and A.J. were sitting in the kitchen watching Brian finish the dishes, with the exception that Isabella and A.J. were locked in a kiss. "You know what?" Nick said to Isabella.

"What?" Isabella asked, thoroughly uninterested.

"I want to go into one of Mercedes dreams."

"Knock yourself out," A.J. said, going back to Isabella.

"I've always wanted to go inside her thoughts."

"They may be pretty calm," Isabella said. "Especially compared to Cassandra's."

"Oh, right," Nick said, and ran after Mercedes.

Laying in Nick's bed, buried deeply underneath the covers, Cassandra couldn't get the events of the night out of her head. Then what Brandon, or who she had thought was Brandon, had said about the fire. No one had known what they had said to each other that night, or about the gash on her head or the sparks in his eyes or how she had covered his eyes with his shirt. When she finally drifted off a little, she kept having little flashbacks of that night.

"Cassandra, turn around," Nick requested. Confused, Cassandra slowly turned around. He gently pressed his entire hand to the back of her head, and then pulled away. He looked at his hand and it was covered and dripping in blood. "You have a huge gash in the back of your head."

"I must have gotten in when I hit my head on the floor."

"It looks really bad."

"Don't worry about it."

"No, I will. It is streaming blood. How do you feel?"

"Well, I know it's hot in here, but I have this sudden chill like it is freezing in here."

"You must be losing too much blood." Nick bit his lip, then took his shirt off. "Lay down."

"Nick, I don't think this is the best time for that-"

"You know what I mean. And you call me the smart ass."

"What? What did I hear you say?"

"Nothing. Just lay down." Nick bunched up his shirt in a pillow shape and let Cassandra lay down on it. "Now I'm no doctor, but that should help a little."

"It should," she agreed.

"Good. Are you comfortable?"

"If you want to put it that way."

"All right, try to rest. I know it's hard, but try. I'll try to look for the door I asked the workers to put in if they could and they said they would try." He kissed her lips softly then began to feel his way around the basement.

"Be careful," she said.

"I will." All of a sudden, Nick found a string to the basement lights. "I think I found us some real light."

"Nick, no-" Nick pulled the string before Cassandra could carry through with her sentence. As soon as he pulled the string, sparks went flying and the light bulb blew up. Cassandra could hear the glass trickle to the ground with a crisp sound. She heard Nick yell, not in terror, but in pain. "Nick? Nick, are you okay?"

"My eyes!" he yelled.

"Stay there, I'm coming."

"Oh it hurts Cassandra!"

Cassandra shifted uneasily in her sleep. After that flashback was over, it melted into another horrific memory.

"Nick, we are really not going to live, are we?" Cassandra asked.

"No," Nick said. "May I touch you one last time?"

"Of course. You needn't ask."

Nick brushed his fingers through Cassandra's hair a few times. Then his hands fell gently to her face. She closed her eyes and swallowed back tears, as his hands softly ran over her eyes, down the sides of her face, and then brushed her lips. He pulled her face close to his and gave her a short, passionate kiss. Nick smiled. "A.J. was right. You don't appreciate things half as much as you do after you have lost them."

"You will never lose me Nick, never!" Cassandra felt her tears began to flow down her face. "Never."

"Listen, will you do me a favor?" he asked.

"Anything for you my darling dear."

"Block out the sound of everything burning and try to hear the music we heard in our heads that day on the boat." He paused. "Do you hear it?"

"Yes, yes, I hear it. It's so beautiful."

"May I have this dance?"

"Yes."

Nick grabbed Cassandra in his arms. Cassandra began to cry softly on his shoulder. "I'm glad that I can hold you now because I know our time has come. So you will die in my arms tonight. I'll be there for you, I swear to you. Anytime you want me, anytime you need me, I'll be there. I want you to want me for all that I am."

"I feel the same."

"I swear that I would and will do anything for my queen."

"Nick, I love you. I can't live or die without you. Please, God help us."

"I'm here for you Cassandra. It will be quick and easy."

"Why us Nick? Why us?"

"I don't know."

"What did we do?" Cassandra asked and began to cry even harder.

"Shh, stay calm, my Cassia. At least we are together."

"Nick, I wish you hadn't come after me when I fell down the stairs."

"Why?"

"Because maybe you could have gotten away from this horrible death."

"I would never, and will never leave you alone. If I had to live life without you, that would surely be a horrible death."

"You are too good to me," Cassandra said as they continued to dance to their soundless music.

"No," he said. "If anyone is too good to the other, it would be that you are too good to me."

"Nick, thank you."

"For what? I made you come down here and I got you trapped down here. It's all my fault. I should thank you. I mean, you risked your life to find me over here and you trusted me when I said that nothing would happen. I'm so sorry I've let you down."

"God no. You haven't let me down at all! Don't ever think that. I forgive you, if you forgive me?"

"Forgive you for what?"

"Anything and everything. I walked out on you, and ran away from you, and you still put up with me."

"I forgive you," he said.

"And I forgive you," she said.

"You know, you are a pretty good dancer," he said abruptly.

"Nick, I love you," Cassandra said. She gave Nick one last long, and desiring kiss.

"I love you, too. I must be the luckiest man alive. Cassandra....."

"Nick....."

"Nick!" Cassandra screamed and snapped up. She wiped her face and her forehead that was covered with tears and a cold sweat. Her breathing was short and catchy and she was afraid to close her eyes. All of a sudden, she heard that voice again.

Cassandra, please wake up!

She shook the voice out of her head. She got up out of the bed and walked slowly down the stairs, holding tightly to the banister. She was almost about to turn into the kitchen when she saw the television on in the living room. She went into the living room and saw Brian watching a re-run of The Monkees. The light from the screen stung her eyes a little. "Brian?" she said softly and sleepily.

"Oh hey, Cass," he said. "I didn't wake you up did I?"

"Oh, no. I woke myself up. Where's Mercedes?"

"She went to sleep a while ago. Here, have a seat," he said and patted the couch. She sat down next to him and pulled the blanket down from the top of the couch and bundled herself into a little ball. "Cold?"

"Actually, yes. Hey, what time is it?"

Brian looked down at his watch. "It's quarter till one, in the morning."

Cassandra groaned. "Couldn't sleep, huh?" she asked him.

"I dunno. Just not tired, I guess. What about you?"

"I was having some awful nightmares. So vivid."

"What about?" he asked curious.

"The night that I thought both Nick and I were going to die in that fire. I had two flashbacks, and every line was the same. Nothing changed. The fire was in the same place, he said the same sweet things, I cried the same tears."

"That's terrible."

"Yeah, and a lot of thoughts just keep running through my mind and they won't leave me alone."

"About Nick, huh?"

"Well, yeah, basically," she confessed. "And A.J. and my sister."

"Me, too. I guess I can attribute that to my insomnia!"

Cassandra laughed and leaned her head down on his shoulder, and yawned again. "I'm glad that you're my best friend."

"Me, too. I guess now that Nick's gone, I gotta look after you." He sighed sarcastically.

"Hey! It's not that bad!" She looked up to his face and their eyes caught, and locked.

When Nick opened his eyes, he realized that he was standing in the middle of a carnival. It was day time and the sunlight reflected heavily off of the ferris wheel in the distance. Something shiny caught his eye. He looked down and gasped. He was dressed in a bright pink ballerina uniform and in his right hand, he held a silver wand. "Oh my God," Nick said to himself. Just then, he heard a loud voice shouting orders. He looked up to see Brian dressed in an army uniform carrying a large, orange squirt gun and a cigar hanging out of his mouth.

Brian pointed to Nick. "You!" he shouted. "With the pink leotard on! Stand up straight!"

Nick did as he was told and stared straight at Brian. "Brian?"

"That's General Brian to you, sissy boy!"

"Brian, Sweetie!" Nick heard Mercedes calling. "Who are you calling a sissy boy?" Mercedes walked up to Brian and looped her arm through his. She was dressed in a long, green, mid-1800's gown and she was tearing apart a bag of cotton candy. "I said, who are you calling a sissy boy?"

"I'm calling this here pink guy a sissy boy," Brian answered and pointed at Nick.

"Honey," Mercedes protested, "that's Cynthia! Not a boy, Cynthia!"

"Now, Sweetie," Brian said. "You know very well that he ain't Cynthia! This is Floyd!"

"Floyd?" Mercedes said. "Honestly Brian! Sometimes you just-"

"Oh don't start! Don't you start! This here spandex boy needs to know not to cross the Delaware River in pink!"

"But you did, Honey."

"So? That was different. I'm not a sissy!"

"Who says?"

"Now wait a minute-"

"Hold it!" Nick interrupted. "Both of you! If you two don't shut up, I'm...I'm-" He looked down at his wand. "I'm gonna zap you!"

"Oh look, Honey," Brian said. "Isn't that cute? Tinkerbell's gonna zap us!"

"I'm warning you-"

Brian aimed his gun at Nick and shot him with a stream of water.

"Oh I'm wounded," Nick said sarcastically.

"You won't be laughing if your spandex shrinks."

Nick turned and ran. "Isabella!" he yelled. "Get me out of here!" Nick turned around to see Brian, a giraffe, a monkey, and an army of safety pins running after him. "Isabella!"

"Get the sissy boy!" they chanted.

"Oh boy-" Nick closed his eyes.

When Nick opened his eyes, he was sitting in a chair on the opposite end of Mercedes' room. "Oh my God," Nick said. "Never again!"

Brian moved his eyes from Cassandra's. "I dunno how Nick did it," Brian said seriously.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that Nick was always unstable enough as it was and meeting you made him grow up."

"Only a little."

"Actually, a lot. I'd never seen him act so mature! He kept a lot of his feelings bottled up inside because he didn't want to hurt you by exposing them."

"Really? But there were times when he did just break down. But only in private. You have to admit that he had his immature moments!"

"Oh God yes! Of course!"

Cassandra sighed. "Of course," she repeated earnestly. "I just miss him, that's all."

"And I don't? I've known him since he was ten!"

"This has got to be pretty hard on you, too."

"It is. Our relationship was as tight as yours. Well, except, um, well, you know-"

"Yes Brian. I know. I get it."

"Well I'm just glad that I didn't lose you, too."

Cassandra yawned again and crouched up closer to Brian. "Me, too. I guess. You know what?"

"What?"

"I grew up with two sisters, one I just found out about, and as much as I loved them, I always wished for an older brother. And that's where you come in. I love you like you're the brother I never had."

"I love you, too, like the sister I never had." Brian turned back to the television and when he looked back, Cassandra was asleep on his shoulder. He smiled softly and turned back to the television.