The
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December 2008
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Graffiti or Death
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 Here we see evidence why Third-Worlders, i.e., 'Illegal Aliens' cannot exist side by side with those citizens of the civilized world. And the proof is this graffiti, thirty feet above a busy freeway that is under construction. Some moron, or morons, decided it was so important, at risk or life and limb, to tag this cement-transport bridge spanning the southbound I-17, adorning it with a Krylon crayon ending with an inscription that most Arizona has no idea of what it is about.
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December 2008
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Early Christmas
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Your Mr. Wonderful got an early Christmas present the other day. An EXPIRED REGISTRATION WARNING NOTICE from our ADOT Motor Vehicle Division, stuck to the windshield of the mighty eight-year old 100,000 plus-miled Hyundai.
For those of you not living in Arizona, you might wonder, "How much can it be? $10, $20 or $40?" In Arizona, how about more like $98? Never mind that I'm wearing out my donut-spare tire because I picked up two nails, and the crooks at Discount Tire are going to refuse to patch it ("It's got a heat-ring!") and force me to purchase two new tires, after the "check engine" light popped on (meaning it fails the required emissions test) I got no worries.
 In any case, in Arizona, your auto 'registration' is simply another tax. The state does absolutely nothing about the registration, no safety inspections, no mechanical inspections and the emissions test (which amounts to a cantankerous, 40 to 75 IQed employee at the privately contracted emissions station plugging a PC into your car's computer) is paid for with funds out of the registration fee.
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December 2008
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D.C. Vampire
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Sometimes incredible things happen where a couple of pictures alone can tell the whole story.
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December 2008
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What Red Light?
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(below yellow dot) When Phoenix cops are late for their meet at the donut shop, they simply turn on the reds and blues and run through the stop lights citizens must halt at.
Just kidding. Phoenix-Arizona cops are a working bunch in my neighborhood. Because my neighborhood is a gawdawful dangerous place and these guys risk their lives on a daily basis.
They drive Tahoe-SUV's because the Illegal Aliens rarely commit crimes in groups of less than three. That would be "tres" en Español.
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December 2008
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No Ego
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Here I caught another Snottsdale, Arizona egomaniac parked at an expensive restaurant at Kierland Commons. How do I know he's and egomaniac?
Like I've always said, "Driving an H2 Hummer is the same as saying 'I'm an asshole' without moving your lips."
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December 2008
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White UFO
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Here I caught another UFO. You can see the edges of the saucer and that they appear to be drawn in, but that isn't the case, as I never lie, unless it would make for a good story. Or for less taxes. Or avoid a divorce (too late for that). It is amazingly hard to get a clear and focused photo of these guys. This one I captured near Scottsdale Road & Greenway Boulevard in Scottsdale, Arizona.
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December 2008
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47 Chebby
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When my blood brother's and I, attending Cortez High School (alma mater of Alice Cooper) became of driving age in the late 1960s, we all went out and bought cars like this one (only not quite so pristine) that were manufactured before we were born.
Mine was a 1950 Desoto that I purchased for $100 cash and then installed the seatbelts myself. We could confidently drive clapped out cars like these because at high school auto shop Misters Bartee and Knoodle taught us how. In addition to the seat belts, I also replaced a king-pin in the front suspension and a piston in the ultra-high horsepower flathead six.
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December 2008
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Falling
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Amongst a profound silence from the cry-babies, gasoline prices keep dropping. As a matter of fact, this photo taken December 9th, in Surprise*, Arizona is already out-dated as today's price is even lower.
( * For all the Illegal Aliens living out there,
it should be re-named "sorpresa.")
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December 2008
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Cold Lady
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Yes, when you throw your St.Pauli Girl into the freezer for a quick chill, and then forget about it for a few days, by golly, it comes out as frozen and cold as my ex-wife.
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December 2008
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The Culprit
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Living in such a high class neighborhood it is rare that I don't see Phoenix police with lights blazing, either during my drive to work or the drive home to my hovel.
Here we see a culprit cornered at the Circle K that is within drunken-crawling distance of my abode. I've got to start carrying my gun ...
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December 2008
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Black Helo
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Having lived through the Vietnam War (1964-1975) every time I hear the distinctive 'whop', 'whop', 'whop' of a single-bladed Huey helicopter I am immediately flooded with flashbacks. Of Vietnam War movies.
Here you can see the side door open on this Huey with personnel aiming the highly secret sonic brain-wave modifier at your Mr.Wonderful. By the way, I have a feeling this helicopter was in such a
rush, they didn't have time to paint it black.
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November 2008
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Guilty
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 I'm sure you've heard the inane radio commercial (PSA) where the one teen attempts to make the other feel shame for leaving her stereo on when she left the room instead of turning it off, 'saving energy'. Rather, she left it playing a Hannah Montana song no one over the age of twelve or IQ of 12 has ever heard.
The powers that be are trying to make our children feel guilty for wasting electricity (and probably personally causing the death of yet another cuddly baby-seal-munching polar bear) when they burn energy carelessly and without ceasing like my 10pm Thursday night photo demonstrates.
It's not about energy folks, but it is about power. Power over your fellow man.
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November 2008
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Dolt
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Apparently this driver didn't understand what CHANGE President-Elect Obama promised.
 With $4+ gasoline promised by the Messiah-born-in-Kenya , how long do you imagine this dummy could continue to fill up the pride of his life, this half-decade old Navigator?
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November 2008
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Wishing
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Wouldn't take a call to a 'California Psychic' to guess what this driver is "wishin" about...
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November 2008
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Shovel
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All of us guys played with the yellow bulldozers and construction equipment toys when we were kids*. Maybe that's why I'm so entranced as I travel I-17 north of Phoenix, Arizona and see all the grown-up versions of the same yellow construction toys. Only problem is, when am I going to grow up?
* (My parents couldn't afford them, so as a pre-teen, I had to occasionally take a nickel and hot-wire a tractor left at a nearby construction site and drive it around awhile.)
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November 2008
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Or Else
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Would you like to guess which Presidential candidate the driver of this Sienna Van voted for?
Remember "it" starts with harmlessly insane bumper stickers like this. It ends with armed government agents showing up at your door taking what you should have shared previously. Think I'm exaggerating? Try not paying your federal or state income taxes and see what happens.
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November 2008
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Alaskan Handout
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Here's a person who's obviously on welfare and moved to Arizona to escape the brutal Alaska winters...why else would she vote for Obama...especially since she was your typical white trash blubber-armed white trash?
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November 2008
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Pull Over
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In case you didn't think that the big trucks got pulled over for driving like idiots, well they do. Here is one on the west bound State Route 74, being pulled over by one of Sheriff Joe's finest.
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November 2008
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Balloons
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In preparation for the coming recession, your Mr.Wonderful has taken a second job of selling balloons to the Illegal Aliens. You can confirm it is MW because he is wearing the same long sleeved shirt he's been wearing for the past five years.
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November 2008
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Satan's Bus
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Am I the only one who sees this? Does this look like a Christian bus to you? Would you paint a church bus black and then put flames on it?
So that's why I call this vehicle, "Satan's Bus", because it looks like it's driving straight to hell.
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November 2008
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Night Light
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When's the best time to work on street lights, at night of course.
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November 2008
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Classy Apartments
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Sometimes it is fairly easy to discover that you live in a less than first class complex.
Another clue is when many of your neighbors use bicycles as their sole mode of transportation.
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October 2008
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What the Hell?
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 I'm not really sure what this guy is trying to say. I'm fairly sure though, that he needs to be institutionalized.
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October 2008
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Easy Being Green
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There are few classes of workers who are more alcoholic, more stupid, more inconsiderate than security guards and they are known as painters.
Photographic proof why you shouldn't tailgate a painter's truck.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Double Teamed
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As I've mentioned before, when the temperatures cool down in Phoenix, Arizona, we start seeing the bums come out. It's odd that they are supposedly destitute, but yet they can travel around the country as if they are campaigning for federal office.
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Note: If Obama wins, these guys, obviously part of the 40% of citizens who pay no income taxes, will be receiving a 'tax refund' carved out of your paycheck.
Won't you enjoy working two jobs to make ends meet so that the Obama administration can use your blood, sweat and tears to cut these bums a check?
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October 2008
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What?
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Sometimes when I was driving home from work in the morning I just wasn't sure what I was seeing.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Wagon Looking to Crash...Again
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On the AM radio, every morning, I hear about 30 accidents on the byways and highways around the Valley of the Sun. I'm simply wondering if vehicles like this, commonly driven by Illegal Aliens, are causing many of the accidents. If the outside of the car looks like this, what kind of shape do you think the brakes, the tires and the suspension are in?
We know the car doesn't have legal registration, emission certificate, or auto insurance, or the driver a legal Arizona Driver's License, so why should we expect it to be able to avoid causing accidents?
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Tallest Tiki
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I guess these are called 'Tikis' and here is the tallest tiki seen outside of Easter Island.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Fatal
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Once again, another apparently fatal accident on Cave Creek Road. I'd be willing to bet, that since Cave Creek is motorcycle row, that another motorcyclist, who knew about as much about riding a bike as I do about derivatives, ended his life tonight.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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51 A-Hole
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Going westbound on the Loop 101 Thursday, October 9th, I got onto the exit southbound to the 51. The anal port in this Ford Excursion (with a temporary paper license) tail-gated me the whole length of the construction-narrowed exit. Once on the 51 southbound, still being tail-gated, I changed to a slower lane. This moron-idiot-a-hole then spend off down the freeway at over 75 MPH in a 55 MPH construction zone only to exit at Bell Road a few miles later.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Low Down
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 Now, this is one low-riding truck. Obviously a work in progress. When the owner drives it, it actually jacks itself up a few inches so it doesn't throw more sparks than Sarah Palin walking into a Planned Parenthood center.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Scissors Open Beer
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Here you can see me taking a pair of scissors and snapping the top off of a delicious bottle of Pete's Wicked Strawberry Blonde beer.
After about eighteen bottles of this marvelous concoction any woman you see will look like the lady on the label.
Do not try this at home, kiddies.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Here, Hear!
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Think about it. How do you 'honk' at a deaf kid who runs out into the street?
At one of my gated communities we had a deaf and dumb (I'm sure there is some PC appropriate term) family living there, and when they had their parties, they were totally silent. As a joke I always felt like calling in a noise complaint to 911.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Bullet Proof
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As Phoenix, Arizona moves further into the 21st Century, predictions Mr.Wonderful made years ago come true. (Another prediction is, that in the not too far future, the door to your favorite Starbucks or McDonald's or Safeway will not open unless you insert a card or some sort of biometric device to first prove you are trustworthy.)
When my local Wells Fargo remodeled, they installed these floor-to-ceiling bullet-proof panels. With the 'banking crisis', one wonders if they are to keep us citizens from causing violence attempting to access our own money, rather than to keep the area's massive Illegal Alien population from making withdrawals using machine-pistols.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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October 2008
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Cop Bus Stop
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Here's something you don't see everyday: a police SUV pulling over a city bus.
Wonder-link to photo only:
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