Here in Arizona, due to the absurd policies of our barefoot legislators and our insane Governess, the state government is facing an over one and one half billion dollar budget deficit. And how does 'Big Red' plan to address this challenge? Cut the budget by 4%! 4%, that number is fairly close to the rate of inflation folks. This incident points out, once again, exactly how friggin' large our Arizona government has become. They can 'cut' a mere 4% and save $1,500,000,000? Jeeze Louise! that multiplies out to state budget of over $37 billion! That means that this bunch of cereal-brains down at the Capitol with Captain Crunch as their leader sucks off $37 billion dollars earned by private citizens and corporations. But that is not my point today. My point today is that, well consider this: Mrs. Wonderful, due to the never ending consolidations in the corporate world, will lose her job the end of this month. What percent cut in spending do you imagine the Wonderful household will face this December? A hell of a lot more than 4% I can tell you. But when the government comes up thousands of millions of dollars short they cut the budget by minuscule amounts. And know that, while our politicians ponder which programs might be cut, there are thousands of protestors down at the Capitol, from 'tuition paying' college students to homeless advocates, protesting any cuts in their programs. That is why your Mr. Wonderful warns you again and again, "No matter how good it looks, never, ever, ever, ever, vote for any government proposal that calls for any increase in taxes." Because, any tax increase will be permanently cemented onto the unconscionably large tax burden currently crushing us. Cemented on with virtually no hope of ever being chiseled off. 11/07/2001: Rabid Diamondback Fans Celebrate World Series Win !

Wednesday, the downtown streets of Phoenix hosted 400,000 Arizona Diamondback fans for their World Series Parade and B.O.B. worship session. It is really great that the four year old Arizona Diamondbacks kicked the asses of the arrogant New York Yankees, but is it worth a day's wages? Is it worth a kid missing a day of school to prostate himself before his idols? (Hell, when I was in grade school and trying to die of asthma, I missed the day we learned 8 times 7 equals 56. Because of that, I'm still using 7 x 7 = 49 + 7 = 56.) Of course, in today's Arizona schools all a pupil would be missing is the half-awake viewing of a Ted Turner produced videotape explaining why socialist F.D.R. was the greatest President ever (while the teacher snuck out to have a smoke or gulp a Paxil pill) or learning that 'homophobes' are hindering the lifestyles of queers or how Amnesty International has Sheriff Joe Arpiao on their 'Most Wanted' list. So missing school is probably a good thing for these micro-minds of mush. But adults? An adult actually taking the day off of work, forfeiting a hundred or several hundred dollars in pay, merely to get the chance to see a pro-ball player whisk by on a fire engine, or later, listen in rapt adulation to a Diamondback member sputter about how good they feel about victory? And how much they appreciate the support of the fans at $38 a pop? I've never been able to figure out the mind set of these sports fanatics. What is the draw? Do you imagine these ball players care about the fans enough not to strike at the drop of a $24 baseball cap for even more money and privileges? Hell, standing in my guard shack, squinting to witness the action on the 9" television screen, I too was happy for a few seconds after Gonzo slapped his game winning blooper. But how quickly I was snapped back into reality as I realized that in 2001 I was earning less money per hour than I did in 1970! Facing reality is most likely what these sports fanatics are avoiding by concentrating on these ball-based celebrities and worshiping these mere mortals who can simply play a single game exceptionally well. These fans focus in on sports and the successes of their teams, because, whether they be $300 an hour lawyers or uh, er, $9.00 an hour security officers, they have no successes or joy to celebrate in their own miserable lives. And the odd part is, if only they would put 30% as much effort into their own existence, both on economic and personal levels, as they do into hero worship, statistic memorization and beer guzzling, their futures would be so much brighter and happier. 10/31/2001: Protecting the Largest Nuclear Facility in the World

Finally, yesterday, Big Red, Governess of the soon to be bankrupt State of Arizona, announced she had dispatched Arizona National Guard troops to protect the Palo Verde Nuclear Power generating station 50 miles west of Phoenix. They've also established a 10 mile radius 'no-fly zone' that aircraft must avoid. Of course, flying at 600 mph, a passenger airliner could span the 52,800 foot distance, in a scant 60 seconds . . . I read in the 10-20/21-2001 Financial Times that France, a nation that derives 75% of its power from cracking the atom, weeks ago took a much more vigorous approach. They dispatched regular army troops and equipment to protect the 750 acre Le Hauge nuclear reprocessing plant armed with 2,250 mph (3,629 kph) anti-aircraft missiles to be used against any aircraft that wander too close to the facilities. Also they have put ten of their Mirage F-1 aircraft, which can be airborne in a mere two minutes, on 24 hour alert. Sacre bleu! 10/09/2001: Threats of Terrorism at Sky Harbor Prompt No Changes!

Yesterday, some jerk attempting to board a plane at Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport Terminal Four sprinted off at Olympic speed after being 'detained' for an individual going-over by the metal detecting wand. Of course, he was never located and the terminal was closed for business, at a loss of likely hundreds of thousands of dollars, for a total of four hours while police with canine units searched the vacated hallways and moving walkways of the immense facility. Why ANYONE singled out for a wand search is not closely watched and put in a situation to be easily and quickly detained, should attempted escape appear probable, is incomprehensible to me. Am I alone in thinking that after losing four $50 million airliners, hundreds of passenger's lives and then the twin engined passenger jets themselves causing the napalm-like death of six thousand individuals with damages soaring into the billions of dollars that airport security would actually become credible? Would become viable? Would become effective? Just days ago the effing airline industry was weeks away from going bust without an emergency pay out from the taxpayers via the greased palms of Washington politicians. And yet, a scant less-than thirty days after the WTC tragedy, airport security continues to be about as effective as Al Gore with an eye-dropper battling flash flood! Now these kerosene-sniffing airline executives who once believed they held an unbreakable straggle hold on how the public travels are insisting the taxpayers, one more time, handle the security they should be providing, via the stationing of National Guard troops at the airport. If these m####r f#####g idiots, imbeciles and greedy SOB airline company bastards had approached airport security even at the level of the rattiest Las Vegas downtown gambling hall and drinkeria, our nation would not be facing the situation it is today. For years I've watched these doddering fools or morbidly obese beings manning airport checkpoints managing to barely stay awake between cigarette breaks only by concentrating on what they would do when they finally won the Powerball. Couldn't anyone foresee that the security these check points provided was sooner or later bound to be breached by evil entities evidencing the tiniest speck of initiative? 10/08/2001: Summer Ends, Life Goes On

Kee-Riste! I never thought summer would end. As my regular readers realize, this August 1st, I began my first paid-by-the-hour job in thirty one years and it was largely outside. Damn! What a summer. I could not believe that when I was in grade school I used to frolic with my friends, playing Army, in the humidity-laden green and growing cotton field bordering my home in that same type of August heat. Last night being the first night in a long while where Mrs. Wonderful had the windows open, I believe the back of summer has finally been broken. And we will soon relish in delight as our electricity bills drop by over 60%. We're coming into the renowned Winters that have made Arizona the population magnet that it is. (Apparently all those artificial hips are ferrous based, eh?) Working in the security biz, I'm seeing the very wealthy with two (or more) homes trickling back to their Summer-vacant Scottsdale domiciles. Along those lines, last night I reached into the vehicle of a former Arizona state official to shake his hand.From the copilot seat, leaning forward and reaching out his arm, he found himself restrained by the shoulder harness and uttered a Freudian slip of monumental proportions when he explained, "This seat belt is imprisoning me!" Putting things in perspective, this gentleman of gentlemen was hounded out of office and accused of a practice that virtually every real estate investor considers a tradition. And today, the State of Arizona rather than enjoying the bounty of hundreds of millions in the bank created by his true leadership, is instead being crushed by the over one billion dollar deficit engineered by the current PR and private plane prone administration. And to top it off, that murdering S.O.B. and Hell's Angel sycophant, California Democrat, Gary Condit, is still in Congress and now appointed to overseeing our protection! On a lighter note, late last evening I was startled by a huge owl as it flew off into the residential desert I chaperon. Slowing pumping its pillow-cased sized wings it soon disappeared into the self imposed darkness hovering over this part of our suburban Sonoran wilderness. Not long after, the phone rang with the trembling voice on the other end quietly inquiring about a recently missing rat-sized Shih-Tzu breed of dog. Hmmm. 10/03/2001: Hate Crime Insanity Should Cease !

All I could do is shake my head when the Arizona state office of 'Hate Crimes' (or whatever the hell it is called) ugently announced that now all Arizonan's must be more aware of 'Hate Crimes' than ever. What have they termed the smashing of two airliners into the World Trade Center? Were those termed 'Hate Crimes'? And does anyone think that the asinine category of a 'Hate Crime' - with its added penalties - has deterred one single criminal act? The latest victim of a hate crime in Arizona was a gentle man from India who wore a turban. He was openly murdered by a dolt who imagined Muslim's sported turbans! A man who believed all Muslims were American-killers. At this moment, when we need all the resources available, I believe it is time to rescind the ridiculous penalties these 'Bias-Crime' laws impose. These statutes, which inhibit no criminals, and often times make criminals of the innocent, were solely designed to allow our federal government to step-in and prosecute and witch hunt certain individuals whom the states have neither the evidence or the resources to pursue. It is time to erase all hate-crime legislation and expose it for what it is: A failed attempt to provide extra, un-Constitutional protections to certain classes of people residing in these United States.

06/15/2001: Arson Suspect Indicted by Arizona Feds !
	This afternoon Mark Sands was indicted and arrested for the Phoenix Mountain Arson Preserve Fires. (Your Mr. Wonderful, when he was in much better shape, used to mountain bike on Trail 101 which winds its way through the Phoenix Mountain Preserve. So I was more cognizant of the area being arsoned than most Phoenician's.) The assistant U.S. attorney prosecuting Mr. Sands on 22 separate counts will be Tom Hannis who oversaw the Federal Grand Jury I was appointed to for eighteen months. This indictment has given me an excuse to post a rare photo of me (in my most excellent Hawaiian shirt) and attorney Tom Hannis.

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