Please note that all standard disclaimers apply.
Escape From Death
by Walter Streigle
Han Solo whirled around with the Gamorrean Guard's ax and hit Fett
square on the jetpack sending him flying into the Sarlacc. "Damn it!" he
yelled as he was swallowed whole by the beast. He landed in a puddle of
stomach acid.
"Ohh! I really need this now!" he said sarcastically. He sat against
the side of the beast's stomach where it was least likely that he would
have somebody falling on him.
If I use my blaster it would just rumble around and cause a cave-in
killing us all. I could try my jetpack. He pressed the button to
turn it on. It sparked, fizzled out and died. "Damn!!"
Just then, a lightsaber fell down and conked on his helmet. This was
like no lightsaber he had ever seen before. Instead of being a single
blade, there were two. One was on the right, the other on the left. It
must have been unearthed as the beast had been moving around.
He ignited it and started to twirl it. A plan was forming in his brain.
"If I can get to the Sarlacc's head, I can destroy his brain and he'll
die instantly," Fett thought allowed.
He looked above him and saw the evil beast's teeth. If it is
possible to use my left wrist-grappling hook to hook one of his teeth, I
can pull myself to the same level as his brain.
Knowing that he would only get one shot at this he shot the hook. It
seemed as though it had fallen short. He looked down with despair and
then back up with so much hope in his masked eyes, he did not recognize
himself. The hook began to climb again. Farther and farther. It looped
around the tooth.
Fett pulled himself up the rope. He got perfectly even with the brain
and thrust one side of the lightsaber in. With a shriek, the Sarlacc
squirmed about and suddenly Fett noticed he had been projected across
the desert and was sitting in a pile of sand only feet away from the
dead Sarlacc.
He began to wander back to Jabba's Palace when he saw a skiff that had
gone down. He rushed over to it and found that it was Jabba's. He rushed
inside to see if there were any survivors.
He walked around the main recreation room of the skiff to see who was
there. Under a pile of twisted metal, he saw the slug-like figure of
Jabba the Hutt. His fat was leaking everywhere.
Boba Fett exited the skiff after fixing his jetpack. He had decided
that he would take credit for this kill. He had proof, Jabba's right eye,
and who would doubt him.
He turned on his jetpack and flew back to Mos Eisley. Walking into the
spaceport, he noticed his mechanic taking apart the hyperdrive. "Hey,
boss. I got you the new hyper-engine you wanted. I'm installing it now.
Your ship'll be ready in about twenty minutes.
Fett walked away and went over to the Cantina. He sat down and listened
to the band play. Suddenly Sy Snootles walked over to him and said, "Hey
how'd it go with Jabba."
"Ahh, yes. Jabba is dead. I killed him and blew up the skiff."
"Alright," she said excitedly, "I was really beginning to fear for my
life over there. So, I get off in an hour, wanna go catch a concert.
The Jedi Rockers are in town."
"Sorry babe no can do. I'm setting up a meeting with Kajoo the Hutt
soon as I get outa' here. I'll really be making some cash off of
this.
Fett ordered a blue drink from the bar and drank it through a straw.
He was beginning to think of the other bounty hunters. He would be
forced to endure much shame if any of them ever found out that he was so
down on his luck he was going to be taking credit for another person's
kill. So what if a non-hunting Jedi had been the true culprit that
choreographed the entire stunt and it was a female political figure that
killed him. Fett knew that didn't matter. He was breaking the first rule
of bounty hunting.
He didn't even realize that 20 minutes had passed. The mechanic came in
and said, "Boss, the SLAVE II is ready to go!"
"I'll be along in a couple of minutes to board her," he said as he
finished his drink. He walked to his ship and got aboard. Fett had the
course set before he even sat in the chair of the cockpit.
When he reached his destination, there was a Hutt waiting there for
him. Fett showed him the eyeball and took the money he had been
promised.
The End
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