Title: Continued Passage

Author: Kiva

Feedback: Appreciated, at kiva31@yahoo.com 

Rating: G

Pairing: Sam/Janet, Pre-Slash.

Category: Angst, a lil' H/C I suppose and some friendship.

Season/Spoilers: Set just after Rites of Passage, so spoilers for that, and just about anything before that, especially anything concerning Cassie.

Synopsis: A moment of understanding after the trauma of the episode.

Notes: Really just a distraction from a longer Sam/Janet fic, this might actually set up the start of the relationship that will be the center of that story (provided I ever finish the bloody thing.) Dedicated to those on the TF list that encouraged me to even think about taking time out from my usual J/D fics to write some Sam/Jan...you know who you are!

And thank you *so* much to Majel for the wonderful Beta - completed brilliantly when she wasn't well! 

 Warnings: Erm...insomnia bites? 

Disclaimer: The characters of Stargate SG1 are not mine, nor do I lay any claims on them. This is for entertainment purposes only, and done in the hopes of shutting the damn plot bunnies up.

Licking her dry lips and stretching her arms high over her head, Samantha Carter let out as sigh as she joined her hands together, tugging until the joints popped. Letting her arms go in a controlled drop, she rubbed her tired eyes, checking out her watch. She was surprised to see the lateness of the hour, her attention obviously so distracted that she hadn't even realized that it was now the very early hours of the morning.

Knowing that now that all of the drama surrounding Nirti's infiltration of the SGC had ceased, she should get some sleep, Sam decided to do exactly that. It was far too late for her to drive home safely now -- her eyes were already feeling sticky and full of sand -- so she decided to bunk out in her assigned quarters, and proceeded to close her lab for the night.

Walking down the near-empty corridors, sparing a nod or a twitch of the lips for the few personnel she encountered, Sam was brought up short suddenly as she passed the commissary. It appeared dark through the small glass windows, situated high on the door itself, but she could still see that the room was not empty, a figure sitting slumped at one of the tables. Though the person had her back to Sam, she instantly recognized Janet Fraiser.

Biting her lower lip, Sam debated whether or not to join her. A part of her wanted to push through those double doors, and offer comfort to her friend, something probably sorely needed since the events of the last couple of days. Another part of her, however, knew that sometimes, people just wanted to be alone.

Finally, the former won, and she carefully entered the room.

"Janet?"

The doctor looked up, her head turning around until she saw Sam, one hand swiping her eyes quickly as she cleared her throat. "Oh, hey," she greeted, her voice sounding slightly hoarse, as if she'd been crying, Sam realized. Coupled with the faint track marks down her flushed cheeks, Sam guessed that was exactly what she'd been doing. "Uh...what are you doing up?" she asked next.

Sam walked over to her, pulling out a seat and settling down opposite her position. "I could ask you the same thing," she tried to smile. The attempt failed almost before it had even begun, as she looked closely and saw the tiredness reflected back at her from her friend's face. "I thought that you'd be getting some well-deserved sleep now that Cassie is almost all better."

Janet shrugged, placing the mug she held clasped between her hands down, her movements exaggeratedly careful as she thought over her answer. "I don't know, I just - I couldn't sleep."

Sam scooted forward on her chair until she was perched on the very edge, her arms on top of the table, allowing the limbs to take most of her weight as she leaned forward, hands folded together. "Why not?"

Janet licked her upper lip, a gesture Sam knew to mean that the other woman was uncertain. "I - can't stop thinking," she said finally. "I admit, that when Cassie first came in to my care, I was...scared. Afraid that - I wouldn't be what she needed. Worried, that she would never take to me, you know." She paused a moment, the kind expression Sam wore gently urging her on. "And...I was frightened that I wouldn't be a good enough mother."

Her mouth quirked briefly, one shoulder lifting again in an almost-shrug. "But it worked out. Soon, I couldn't imagine a day without her. None of us could," she added, referring to the members of SG1. "However...I still worried," she admitted. Her voice began to shake a little now, the emotion getting harder to suppress. "Other things, you know. Things your parents would warn you about growing up. Like...how she would be when she came in to contact with Earth based illnesses, how they would react with her alien physiology." She stopped as she noticed the slight smile on Sam's face, replaying her words in her mind. "Okay, granted that wasn't quite what my parents were afraid of, but...just the idea of my child getting sick. Or even that she would have an accident the first time she started crossing the road without me. Boys," she smiled slightly. "Her friends, the crowds she would run with, the parties she would go to. Drugs, alcohol, things like that."

Sam could see when her eyes began to glisten with moisture, Janet battling the tremor in her voice now, as she continued speaking. "I never - I mean, I knew that one day we might lose the battle with the Goa'uld...and that it wouldn't be just her in danger, but the whole world. But - to almost lose her like this." Her voice hardened as her face set. "To have to rely on that *bitch,*" she practically spat, startling Sam slightly with the sudden use of language. "The one who made her sick in the first place, who destroyed her whole world, to make her better again -" She stopped, biting back the anger as she bathed her lip again, her movement a quick swipe of pink. Her gaze centered, aimed directly at Sam. "I'm afraid that she'll get sick again. And I won't be able to help her. No one will, because we let that monster go." Her breath stuttered suddenly, and Sam knew that as the anger faded, she was fighting tears once more.

Unfortunately, she couldn't give Janet the 100% reassurance that she wanted. The scientist in her, a part that she sometimes almost hated, forced her to admit to herself, that they hadn't even known that Cassandra was going to fall sick in the first place, her illness thanks to Nirti's genetic manipulation of her people. If the Goa'uld had been able to plant one surprise like that in her genetic make up, then who knew what else lurked beneath the surface. Hopefully, the tools that she had used to cure the fever caused by the Hak'Taur experiment, had managed to correct any other little 'bugs' waiting to be set off, but there was no way to be sure.

All that she could do right now, was be there. For Janet as well as Cassie. She reached out then, resting one hand over Janet's, still wrapped around the drink she'd had when Sam came in. The doctor took the covered hand from the mug it cradled, turning it over and returning the grip. She looked up finally, her eyes finding Sam's.

They sat there for what felt like hours, though Janet knew that it was only a few minutes at the most. Although they were simply staring at each other, Janet felt several things being said, all without words. So, she in turn tried to answer them all, unsure that she had succeeded, until Sam broke out in to a wide smile.

"Sam?" she whispered.

The smile faded slowly, until only the corners of the blonde's mouth were quirked. "Let's go check on Cassie, Janet," she suggested. "Then I'll drive you home."

Standing with her friend, their hands still loosely linked, Janet nodded.

The End.

Back to Sam and Janet.