My Poems
These have been added on December 30, 2000. NARF NARF! =)
* * *
Written December 8, 2000
*UNTIL IF*©
If you hear my calling
Answer my cries
If you hear my screaming
Comfort my heart
If you hear the echoes
Yell back a reply
If you hear my pleading
Beg me to hear
If you sense my suffering
Hold me in your arms
If you feel my tear drops falling
Wipe them away forever
If you hear my heart breaking
Give it back with your love
If you hear me falling
Grab me before I land
If you understand me
You must find a way
If you see me in the dark
Light my way
If you know I'm lost
Guide me through
If you hear my voice inside
Hold on, don't let us disappear
Until you hear my cries
You'll love her still
Until you sense my pain
You'll hold her, push away her fears
Until you understand me
You'll never know I exist
Until you love me
I'll never smile one sunshine ray again
Written December 8, 2000
If you read this, know that it goes in a circle..when you get to the end, go back and read the top of it and you'll understand what I mean...
*STILL*©
Without an answer
I'm still left to search
Without a love
I'm still left to hold my head down
Without a kiss
I'm still left with an empty heart
Without a hand to hold
I'm still left holding onto myself
Without a prayer
I'm still left with no answer
Do you see it? It's probably the shortest poem I've ever written but do you see the cycle I was talking about??
Written December 15, 2000
*DREAMS*©
I want to run
I want to hide
I want to fly away
I want to bury my soul
I want to cover my heart
I want to drown
I want to scream out all my pain
I need you to run, too
I need you to seek me from my hiding place
I need you to fly away with me
I need you to bury my soul within yours
I need you to hold my heart
I need you to give me air to keep me from drowning
I need you to hear my screams of pain
I demand you to find a way
To run by my side
Letting me lean on you
I demand you to save me from the sea
Don't let me drown
But let me drown in your soul
I demand that you hear me
To control my screams
Erase the pain
I dream of running to you
I dream of hiding in you
I dream of flying away with you
I dream of burying my soul within yours
I dream of you loving my heart
I dream of you saving me from drowning alone
I dream of you hearing my painful screams
Dreams only last a little while
Before I have to run and hide
All by myself
Left alone with my dreams screaming my pain
Started on December 15 and finished on December 18, 2000
*MOONLIGHT*©
I lay down in my bed again
Another day passed
One more day alone
One more time to grieve my pain
Reaching deep inside for the right question to ask
Reaching out beyond for an answer to grasp
I turn over on my side
Trying to block out the sounds
Needing to blot out the world
If I close my eyes hard enough
Will the future come into focus?
Maybe I'll be surrounded with enough darkness
I toss and turn all night
Can't seem to slip from it all
Constantly reminded
I stare out the window for another time
Trying to capture the moon in my heart
And to hold the stars in my eyes
The peaceful sounds of the night
Always come back to haunt me
To laugh in my face
To smile as tears pour from inside
Maybe if I hold onto tomorrow
Everything will make sense
But, maybe tomorrow is worse than today
I take one last glance of the moon
I know I'm living with my death wish
And when I die
I want to be with my wish
To be buried with it
So I can live in peace
Alone with my wish
Finally, to be by your side
Written December 19, 2000
*POEMS*©
I write another poem
Create more words on paper
I scratch out a possibility
Write out a new thought
The pen scratches against the paper
Bringing out a blue stream of words
Sometimes they're black
Or purple, maybe even green
How about the dreaded pink?
Once more I become lost in the ocean of my world
A time to lay out my feelings
To outline my life with a red border on the left and right side
I can get a hold on myself
With just one poem on a paper
30 lines of constant babble
But, they're my babbles
My world
My heart
A part of me
One no one could ever have
In my world of poems, no one exists
Except for who I want to be there
A pause
A moment of silence
Time to think
What should I write next?
They don't always rhyme
It's more often than not that the words don't agree
But, they are mine
Mine to create
Or mine to annhiliate
Maybe no one understands
Sometimes they bring tears to someone's eye
Or a smile on their lips
Anything to know they like it
Or hate it
But, hate them or love them
They are mine
They are me
And I am them
Another poem finished
Another thought complete
All Poems by ©Christi Bickart
Please do not copy.
Thank you and have a good day/night=)
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