My Poems
Added July 31, 2000
* * *
Written July 28, 2000
*AM I?*©
Am I trying to find
Something that doesn't exist?
Am I believing in something
That could never be?
Am I loving someone
That will never love me back?
Am I needing someone
That needs not to know me?
Am I crying over a love
That will never love me back?
Am I waiting for a moment
That will never come?
Am I loving the future
When I should be hating it?
Am I longing for a life
That will never be lived?
Am I hiding from the truth
While it lives in me?
Am I listening to the lies
That I tell myself?
Am I foolish
To dream?
Am I wishing on a star
That isn't for wishing?
Am I listening for an answer
That will never be told?
Am I living this life
When I shouldn't be?
Written July 31, 2000
*I'M TIRED*©
I'm tired of loving and losing
I'm tired of giving out my heart
And having it beaten beyond repair
I'm tired of the pain that takes my life
Every time that I love
I'm tired of saying 'I love you'
And getting 'I don't need you' back
I'm tired of trusting in someone
And something
And being disappointed
And again left with nothing but pain and tears
I'm tired of giving it my all
Because now I have nothing
No all to give
I'm tired
So very tired
I'm tired of looking on to better days
Because days only get worse
I'm tired of saying 'always'
When it really always meant 'never'
I'm tired of searching for an answer
That will always remain a question
I'm tired of trusting
When all I get back is a broken heart
And tears of blood
Maybe I'm just tired of living
Because life brings about too much heartbreak
That makes me tired
So tired
Written July 31, 2000
*LISTEN*©
Listen to me now
Hear my words
That I cry every night
Open not only your ears
But the heart that lies in you
Believe the things that I have to say
That I must say
I can't make you see
But pray with me
So that you'll understand
Seek out my voice
This wasn't my choice
But everything happens for a reason
At least I try to believe that
Please tell me that you will not turn me away
Tell me that there will come a day
No more lies, please
I can't take them anymore
For all my life I've listened to lies
That lived within me
Listen to everything I have to say
To the last word and last breath
Before you make a decision
A decision that will affect my life
To my dying day that could be today or tomorrow
Or in 80 years
Take my heart with yours
And tell me what I need to hear
Because another heartbreak
Will make me break
And make me lie forever in the dark
All Poems by ©Christi Bickart
Please do not copy.
Thank you and have a good day/night=)
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