CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

 

 

 

 

 

 

            The next morning brought the sun, shining down on the city. Yoko sat on the window seat, enjoying it and her tea. She thought about the night before and all that had happened. She never liked sharing her husband with anyone but was tolerant of the other Beatles. He usually took her everywhere he could, but on occasions such as this he would prefer to be alone with his mates. She knew for now she’d have to share him more and because of the reasons behind it , she thought it ok. She hoped Paul would be alright down the line. Right now he needed so much care. She got up and made them some tea, filling Paul’s only half way, just as John instructed. She went to get them up, if they were going to the morgue she needed to cut Paul’s hair and get him to shave. She put Paul’s down and noticed his eyes watching her curiously as she spiked his tea. 

 

 

 

His head hurt and his body shook as he got up, thanking Yoko and took the mug. The mug had cooled with the added liquid and he was able to drain it quickly.  He lay back waiting for his body to stop shaking.

 

 

John had gotten up and started sipping his tea and eating the toast with the jam she had brought in. Paul feeling steadier declined the food for another drink with his tea.

 

 

“Last one mate, you have to be sober enough to do this. We can stop by your house and grab some clothes , after you shave and stuff.”

 

 

Yoko looked concerned at her husband.

“Are you sure you are able to do this?”

 

 

He took her hand and smiled lovingly at her.

“Yeah, my head feels better today. Still hurts but he needs us, he can’t do it. He can’t even make a decision. I’m not letting him go alone.”

 

The end of the sentence he stated quite adamantly. Yoko knew with his tone that nothing would change his mind.

 

John took a shower and got ready while Yoko tried to cut Paul’s hair so it didn’t look so long and wild. He shaved and dressed , waiting silently on the couch for John.

He didn’t want to do this . He sat with a mournful look on his face dreading the next few hours. All he wanted to do was go home and get pissed.

 

 

They got to his house and opened the door. They all walked in as Paul looked around. Part of him thought Sandy would be there and give him hell for staying out all night. He cringed at the thought of the tirade she would have when she saw him and then remembered why they were there; the she was dead. He had to go to that blasted morgue.

 

 

He traipsed up the stairs, not wanting to go in the bedroom and see anything that belonged to Sandy. He packed and changed as fast as he could to get out of the room that gave him the chills. There was no getting around it as he saw reminders of her spread around. His fears spoke loudly to him. She lived here, took care of the house, took care of him, told him what to do and she wasn’t coming home. A mixture of emotions came to the surface as he looked around. Fear- what would he do with out her to care for him and let him know what he should do? Then the anger rose; how could she have done this to him, how could he have let her? It boiled and took over. He picked up a picture of them on their wedding day and flung it as hard as he could against the wall. It was one his brother Mike had sent them, beautifully set in an old frame. He thought of his family for the first time in awhile and wondered how they would take this. He didn’t want to face telling them and he didn’t want them to see him like this. That was one of the reasons he rarely spoke to them anymore, letting Sandy take control of another part of his life by talking to them for him. She had convince him they would get all over him about his changing and that she was happy if he was happy, he didn’t have to do anything; she had promised him. He went over to the dresser , pulling open the draw hard . He tore through it franticly looking. He knew it was in there and then he found it. His flask, she had given him and a small bottle that was unopened. He carefully filled it and stuck it in the pocket of his sports jacket. There was a little left so he drank it greedily and then threw it as hard as he could against the wall to join the picture. He watched the fragments of glass and liquid slid down with satisfaction. Picking up his bag, he headed downstairs to John and Yoko, full of dread at what waited for him.

 

 

 

They heard the noise of crashing glass a few times and John had to hold Yoko back from going up there.

 

 

“Part of the exorcism luv.” He assured her.

 

They watched him as he slowly walked down the stairs. Ringo had taken Martha for awhile so Paul knew she was ok. All that was left was to go and get it over with. They left and he looked back briefly as they got into the car.

 

 

Paul’s face held no emotion as they headed into the morgue. He kept feeling at his pocket, making sure his flask was still there. The security of it helped him as they walked in.

 

 

The doctor looked up. He had expected them and made arrangements for the floor to be clear, to give them privacy. He led them to the slab and pulled Sandy’s out. He pulled the cover down , making her visible. Paul stood frozen in place as he looked at her lifeless grey body.

 

John pulled him away and nodded for it to be closed.

 

The doctor came up to them after closing it.

“Mr. McCartney is this your wife?” the doctor asked.

 

 

He nodded slowly , his face only showing slightly what he felt. He leaned against the wall, not able to stand on his own.

 

The doctor went to him and spoke in a low voice. No matter how many times he did this, the family’s always got to him.

“I need you to sign a few papers. One stating she is indeed your wife and one for the arrangements. Where do you want her taken for the burial? “ He asked.

 

 

Paul looked down at the floor and then back to the doctor as he spoke.

“Her mother….St. Mary’s…….bury her there with the Parker name.”

He spoke with no emotion.

 

The doctor gave him the paperwork. He signed what he had to not bothering or caring to read it. When they were done he started to leave. The doctor called him back.

 

“Mr. McCartney? Did you know your wife was 6 weeks pregnant?”

 

Paul looked at him stunned , then slammed out the door. He was glad the halls were empty as he ran down them. He found a corner to hide behind. He turned towards the wall and rested his head against the cold tile. The coldness felt so good against his skin and he again wished his heart to be so cold. He sighed and dry heaved with the sickness of the knowledge he had just found out. This time she was really pregnant, he thought as he coughed from the acid in his throat. He turned around , leaning his back against the wall, he slid a bit so he was leaning his shoulder blades against it. He frantically felt for his flask and took it out. He chugged it down as fast as he could needing it and needing to steady himself.

 

 

That’s how John found him. He watched Paul drown from what was in the flask.

“So you’re taken to a flask now have you?”

 

 

He watched as Paul took it from his lips. He didn’t need a lecture now , he didn’t know what he needed, but that he knew for sure.

 

“Piss off Lennon!” He said annoyed and then drank more of the flask.

 

 

John came closer, he didn’t take what Paul said personally.

“You have a right to be angry Paul, at least you showing something. Don’t be soft just let it out.”

 

 

He leaned on the wall next to Paul. He grabbed the flask and took a swig. He needed that. What news; to find out she was really pregnant. Her plan, although it back fired , had obviously been on schedule. He gave the flask back to Paul. He didn’t want him more upset if that were possible and knew he needed it . He was finally showing some anger maybe even rage that had been trapped in side of him , John thought. He was suddenly aware that Yoko was standing there looking at the two men.

 

 

Suddenly, like a spring , Paul jumped up and ran to find an exit. He could no longer be there. The disinfectant smell was making him sick. He felt the walls closing in on him and he was suffocating. He ran faster, hitting into carts filled with things , tipping a few over as he went. His pace grew faster, more urgent; he had to get out of this place his brain yelled! He saw a door and pushed through it. It led to a cold room. He saw parts of bodies taken out for autopsies and saw a fetus in a jar; his stomach lurched forward. He backed up bumping into the doctor who was coming back in.

“Hey! You shouldn’t be in here.” The doctor said and then he recognized him.

 

It was too late Paul was back out the door. He was running faster bumping into doctors, nurses he didn’t know what they were all he saw were the blur of uniforms. Tears came down his face as the anxiety over took him, he couldn’t out run it. He stopped for a minute and finished off his flask, then pushed it back in his pocket. He was frantic, following the green cement walls for a way out.   He found a door to the outside and slammed through it.

 

 

John looked to see Paul take off. He shot a look at Yoko.

 

“Go to the car, I have to get him!” He said as he took off.

 

 

John ran down the corridor , turning his head in every direction for a sight of Paul.

He pushed open doors looking in and not seeing him. Christ his head hurt and he held tight to his side, but that wouldn’t stop him from his mission.  He saw some toppled carts and followed in that direction. He saw a few orderlies and doctors, hearing them complain about a man running wildly into them. He was like a blood hound hot on the trail. He saw a door swinging ahead of him and knew that would be where he would find him.

 

 

 

He swung through the door looking around. He leaned against the wall for a minute to catch his breath and see where Paul was. He saw they were in the alley in the back of the hospital where all the garbage was. He saw Paul , knelt over, hands on his knees panting. John ran up to him and took the same stance still trying to catch his breath and try to stop the pain in his head and body.

 

 

“What…. are ya….. doin Macca?” John said between pants.

 

 

Paul straightened up and leaned against the wall. His chest burned as he heaved in air and his heart felt like it would burst through his chest. All he could do at the moment was shake his head no.  He wiped the sweat off his face and swallowed hard , feeling the anxiety still flowing through his body. He looked over at John and saw the pain he was in. He watched as John’s breathing return to normal and he straightened up, also leaning again the hard brick wall.

 

“Dunno.” He finally said as his breathing also returned to normal.

 

He ran his hand nervously threw his hair and then looked at John, as he bit his lip.

 

“Dunno? Christ ya went off your trolly, ya nearly killt me and you say ya dunno?” John questioned as he looked over at him.

 

 

 

“I had to get out of there.” He simply stated.

 

 

“Why?” John had a steady gaze on Paul. He didn’t want to have to do this again.

 

 

“I got ta go home.” He looked down as he said it. He knew John wouldn’t let him go back to his house. He waited and then again took off again down the alley.

 

 

John was waiting for this. He quickly moved and jumped him , pushing them both into the wall. He held on to Paul, pushing him against the bricks.

 

“Yer not going anywhere. You haven’t made a decision in months and all of a sudden ya want ta go home? “ He shook his head in angry disbelief and tightened his grip. His head clouded a bit from the excitement and he willed it to stop not wanting to loose Paul.

“Ya can’t just walk through the streets Paul. What about the fans and the press? Did ya think they’d just up and go away did ya?”

 

 

Paul pushed against John and John pushed his whole body against Paul. His body was stuck to Paul pushing in hard and holding him against the brick wall.

 

“I told ya ….yer not goin anywhere. “ he said through gritted teeth.

“They’ll be at your door they will the press and the fans. You don’t want to do this and you shouldn’t be alone.” John ran a hand through his friend’s hair, bringing his palm to the back of Paul’s head and then pushed it onto his shoulder. He had seen the tears welling up in his eyes. His face betrayed him, there was no more mask to cover up the depression and loss he felt.

 

 

Paul heard what John said as he felt his body being pinned up against the wall. The short lived rage went out as he felt John push his head onto his shoulder. He lay there in defeat.

“No press , no fans, no P.R. , No baby, no Sandy……” he sighed heavily; the last  part he whisper so softly John could hardly hear. “no …..me.”

 

 

“It’s gonna come Paulie . Yer gonna pull out of this, I promise you that.” He said as he continued to hold Paul’s head against his shoulder.

“Chin up Lad, We’ll make it. Now let’s go before Yoko goes stark raven.”

 

Paul lifted his head up, looked into John’s eyes and nodded. “Ta “ He said in a soft voice.

 

John was in bad shape and he needed to get back to the car. He prayed he could hold out long enough to get there. John slowly left off of him as Paul had surrendered. His head felt dizzy, the throbbing was explosive. He fell back against Paul, no longer able to stand.

 

 

Paul held him up, saw his face etched with pain and realize what happened. He pushed everything aside and automatically helped him walk. He let John lean against him, his weight became Paul’s.  He didn’t know where they were or where the car was as he searched for it.

 

 

John let Paul drag him along, shifting his weight on to him. The doctor had said rest and here he had just run a marathon and had gotten a little rough. He felt it and all he wanted was a pill and his bed.

 

 

 

Yoko saw them coming out of the alley and had Les drive around to them. She opened the door and they both helped him in. He laid his aching head against her as she told Les to drive them home.

 

 Paul sat and watched them; John would be alright and that’s all that mattered to him at that moment. He’d go to the flat , like John wanted and maybe after a day or so go home.

 

John rested and slept on and off for the next day. Yoko knew he shouldn’t have gone with Paul. George or Ringo could have gone. He was stubborn and his love for his friend had gotten in the way. She gave Paul the guest room, where he vegetated; drinking, smoking and watching the television. He didn’t come out to wash or eat. Only when he used the loo did she see him. She wondered what was going on with him. She had told George and Ringo to wait a day before they came by; explaining what had happened and how bad John had felt.

 

 

 

The next day the story broke wider, telling the world that it was Paul McCartney’s wife that had been killed and all she had done. Someone had even paid and got the story about her being pregnant when she was shot. Paul read the paper; it made him more depressed and when Yoko and John were asleep he left for his home. He hoped it was late enough, that no one would be there. He had the taxi drop him a block away and saw the circus his home had become. He went behind some houses and clumsily jumped the fence in to his garden. Once there he snuck into his own house. He kept the lights off, using the television to see. He grabbed a bottle, his smokes and sat on the couch, drowning it all out, escaping from the world.

 

 

 

Apple put out a full statement in all the papers. The story was told and Paul looked like the victim he was. Nobody knew the intimate details or how bad he was. The story also told of the other three Beatles and that John was feeling much better. The press hounded Apple for a press conference with Paul and the other three. Derrick kept holding them off. He knew that eventually they would have to come forward, but he told the three he would hold them at bay as long as possible.

 

 

That next day Paul held up in his house not answering the phone. He chained the door so no one could come in and he could be alone. Everything that had happened plagued his mind as he rattled around the house. He tried to drink the pain away and it wasn’t working. He looked at himself in the hall mirror. Where was he? Who was starring back at him? He still didn’t know and that drove him crazy as he took his fist and smashed the mirror. Shards of glass lay shining on the floor. He knelt down to them and picked one up. He watched as the light reflected off of it and then caught a small glimpse of himself.

He was still kneeling down in his old jeans and tore up tee shirt as he looked at the arm that didn’t hold the fragment of glass. He squeezed his fist making the veins pop out and he started to think. “No one would know if I ended this pain.” He touched the sharp point of the glass to his arm, pricking himself . He felt the pain and it was a good feeling.

“The pain could just end and she could just go away. All the memories, all the sacrifices, the loneliness, the loss of music and the loss of my soul could be all gone.  Wouldn’t matter and just to feel the pain on the outside would be a blessing.”

 

He watched himself as if he were watching someone else. The hand with the glass slowly ripped into his skin. He felt it! He watched the blood pool up and then run down his arm. He felt something open up inside him as he cut himself again. He stopped half way through it realizing he didn’t want this, just the pain to come out. What came out was a rage so strong he couldn’t control himself.

 

He jumped up and dropped the piece of glass as the blood dripped to the floor. He marched out to the shed and got a shovel and a large rubbish can. His fury raged as he brought them in to the house . He took the shovel and started smashing all of Sandy things he could find. The sweat dripped off of him making his shirt wet as he ran around the house busting, smashing and destroying anything of hers he could. His heart was racing and his blood pumping as he went on his rampage. Next, he took the large can up to the bedroom. There he threw all her clothes and belongs into it. When he was done he dragged it down the stair and threw it out the back door. It crashed on the ground spewing some of the contents on the grass. Finally, he grabbed a bottle and went to the music room. He collapsed to the floor, tired and satisfied. He opened the bottle, lit a cigarette and then looked down at his arm. The bleeding had stopped and an anger scar formed. He shrugged it off, got his guitar and started another bout of drinking.

 

 

 

 

 

John had been scared when he found Paul had left. He felt better so much more like his old self. He paced the floor as he called George and Ringo to tell them Paul had left and was alone for the past day in a half. He told them to come by , they were going to Paul’s.

 

 

When he hung up the phone rang again. He grabbed it quickly thinking it may be Paul.

 

“Paul?”

 

 

“No, Cynthia.”

 

 

“Oh Christ Cyn, I’m sorry I’ve been so worried about Paul and I haven’t been up to snuff, I forgot to call ya. “ He said quickly as he realized his mistake.

 

 

“I read it in the papers. Is it true? Did she really do that? Is he alright?” She rattled off the questions that hung heavy on her mind.

 

“Unfortunately, Bloody Hell Cyn I didn’t want you to find out that way. She did a lot more then the papers even know. Paul is in a bad state, he’s not alright.” His voice dropped at the end of the sentence wondering how Paul was by himself.

 

 

“How bad is he?” She needed to know.

 

 

He sighed into the phone. “He is despondent at times, drinking excessively , but he has been doing that for awhile now. The cow even encouraged it. She could control him better that way. He’s lost Cyn, not the same Paul we have known and certainly not the Paul you were with this past summer. “

 

 

“John ….Oh God….I’ll pack Julian up and come home straight away.” She told him, with worry in her voice.

 

 

“No, Cyn don’t , not yet . You wouldn’t recognize him. He’s lost and He scares me the way he is. “ He admitted to her.

 

 

“Why did you call me Paul and sound so urgent about it?”

 

“He snuck out of here after reading all that shite in the Papers. I suppose he went back to his flat. I saw a picture of it in today’s mail and it’s a circus parading around there.”

 

 

“I want to come home. I need to see him, be there for him.” She begged.

 

 

“No, the lads and me we’re goin there today. Wait a week at least, so we can see how he is. I really don’t want you to pull Julian out of school either . I wish it could wait til the winter holiday.” He told her with concern.

 

 

“I can’t wait that long . I was never planning on staying on here and mum could get him in school by her. John….I need to see him.” She pleaded.

 

 

“Alright then do as you need. Just promise me you’ll at least wait til the end of the week so as we can go by there and see what’s up.”

 

 

“Right, I’ll call you with the details. Where should I call here or Paul’s?” she asked.

 

“Paul’s I’m not leaving that stupid nit again. In his state I don’t know what he’ll do or what he’s done. I wanted to try weaning him off the booze, so as he could get a clearer head.” He explained.

 

 

“I’ll ring you there tomorrow. Is that alright?”

 

 

“Yeah fine….I’ll send Les to pick you up then. I have to ring off the lads are here and Cyn?.....I am truly sorry you found out this way. “

 

 

“I understand John really. Now go to him . I’ll ring you soon.” With that she hung up the phone.

 

 

He listened to the tone for a minute before coming back to reality and hanging it up.

Then he walked to the door to let George and Ringo in.

 

 

“John you still haven’t heard from him?” Ringo asked.

 

 

“No, just got off the phone with Cyn. Can you believe I forgot to tell her? She read it in the blasted Papers. “ he sighed as he watched them walk in.

 

 

“It’s a real zoo over there. We passed it coming over here. They’ll never give us peace going in.” George reported.

 

 

“Then we will do as we did in our younger days.” John grinned at them. The thought of out smarting the press thrilled him.

 

They both looked confused at him.

 

“Remember how we would sneak into the stores and nick fags and things we couldn’t buy?” John’s smile got wickeder at remembering how they were as kids.

 

 

“Yeah, I remember you telling me bout that. But how are we going to sneak by all those bleeding reports and gatebirds?” Ringo inquired.

 

 

George started to smile along with John , he knew what they were going to do and the old thrill came back to him.

“Sneak in the back way eh?”

 

 

“That’s right Georgie. We’ll go in from the back and they will never suspect it.”

 

Ringo caught on fast . He didn’t know the three of them at that time, but he sure could picture it. Paul would have probably been the one to distract the proprietor , whilst John would fall back nicking thing, filling his pockets and George he would just slide in the back way and nick what John didn’t. He laughed out loud at the thought of the three.

 

“You think it’s laughable do you?” John raised his eyebrow.

 

“We did it y know. “ George said trying to convince Ringo.

 

 

“I never doubted it. Just funny is all to think of it.”

 

 

“Well lads what are we waiting for?” John grabbed his coat and headed for the door , followed by the other two Beatles. Yes, they would sneak in and get to Paul . He only hoped Paul hadn’t gotten to himself and cringed at the thought as he told Yoko he was going and locked the door.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                                                CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

 

 

 

 

The paparazzi came in droves , trying to get the hottest story of the year. Every reporter pushed their way in to get the story first. They waited with cameras and recorders, for Paul to show up. The gatebirds and other fans hung around the front gate. They chanted for him, they had seen some life in the house and knew he somehow snuck by them and got home.

 

 

 

John , George and Ringo got out of the car a block away. They hopped the fence to a neighbor’s house. Once in the back they jumped over each fence towards his house, like children. When they finally got to Paul’s they could see the can lying on the ground with Sandy’s things pouring out of it.

 

 

“Well at least he got her stuff out.” Ringo smiled at them.

 

 

“Yeah, did something anyroad. Hey how we getting in then ? The back door is probably locked.” George asked and looked to John for the answer.

 

 

John smiled at him.” Well mate. Paul’s always told me how the gatebirds crawl in his bathroom window. Sooooo.” He looked up at the window above them.

 

 

“Whose goin in then?” Ringo asked .

 

 

John’s smile wickedly; he looked up to the window and then gave George a look that said it all.

 

“Me?  Why me?” George shook his head not wanting to climb up there.

 

“My dear Hari….You are lanky and the thinnest, you’ll fit nicely.” Again John gave him a wicked smile and raised eyebrows.

 

 

“Hey a lot of fans and me wife like me lanky figure….. They think it’s sexy.” He said defending himself at first and then joking with the end of the sentence.

 

 

He knew John was right . He would fit in better then they would. He just didn’t like the thought.

 

 

“Leg up son. “ John cupped his hands to give George a boost.

 

 

“I dunno, what if I break something?” George hesitated.

 

 

“Yeah won’t, now get up with ya.” John was growing impatient, if he could do it himself he would. He knew George was the only one who could get through the window and nodded up to it, again cupping his hands.

 

 

“Hurry on account of getting to Paul.” Ringo said in a hurried tone.

 

 

George nodded, putting his foot in to John’s waiting hands; he was boosted up, but couldn’t quite reach the window.

“Eh, I can’t quite reach.” He yelled down.

 

 

“Put yer foot on me shoulder and lift yer self up then.” John yelled back.

 

George placed his foot on John’s shoulder trying to steady himself. Once he did he put his weight on his shoulder and pulled his other leg up. Ringo tried to hold his legs in place, hoping he wouldn’t fall. With both feet on John’s shoulders he could see through the window. He banged it open with the palm of one hand while holding the ledge with the other.

 

 

“Hurry up you nit! You’re bloody heavy.” John yelled up to him, with a grunt.

 

George looked down at him. “But I’m lanky and all that…” He teased as the window opened and he slowly lifted himself through it.

 

 

The relief of pressure made John feel light as he and Ringo watched George monkey through the window and into the bath.

 

 

George looked around as he slid in. His hands grabbed the toilet and he pulled the rest of him in. He put his feet on the floor and slowly push him self up right. He slipped on something , catching the sink counter so he wouldn’t fall. He looked down to see a tube of lipstick. The room was in shambles , all of Sandy’s things were smashed or laying around the floor and counter. He scratched his head as he looked and then continued out into the hall. Everywhere he looked things were broken and as he walked down the stairs he saw blood. Concern rose inside him; followed by fear as he looked around and saw the disarray. He walked through to the kitchen, not seeing Paul anywhere. The door was unlocked so John and Ringo could enter.

 

 

Their faces fell as they too saw the wreck in the house. Walking around to try and find Paul they spotted the broken mirror, with the blood around the glass.

 

 

“Shite” was all John could say , feeling a chill run up his spine.

 

 

They raced up stairs opening doors to every room and not finding Paul. The master bedroom looked the worst, things that hadn’t made the can and garden, lay in broken or ripped up piles across the floor. Still there was no sign of Paul.

 

 

“Where do ya think he is?” Ringo spoke sounding as alarmed as the rest of them.

 

 

John bit his lip then looked out the door to the third floor stairs.

 

“The music room; come ead.” He didn’t even finish the sentence before he was charging at the stairs. Banging up them the two crashed into John as he stopped at the door to open it.

 

 

The door to the room opened to the smell of cigarettes, booze and grass. There against the couch was Paul. Guitar across his lap, bottle by his side and an over flowing ashtray on the floor, Paul slowly looked up at them. His eyes droopy, ragged clothes with dried blood on them and his head to heavy to hold up lay slightly down.

 

 

John noticed the ugly red scars on his arm. He was glad that Paul was still with them; he knew by those scars that he had thought of leaving them. It scarred him and he felt better now that they were there to take care of him. He stood with Ringo , starring down at a very drunk Paul.

 

 

George knelt down to him.

“Paul …..you alright?” He waited for a response, his face etched with worry.

 

 

“It…dunnit play…. no more.” He said drunkenly.

 

 

George placed one knee to the floor to support his weight. He took the guitar and balanced it on his other knee.

“Needs a bit of tuning.” He tuned it and started to play a soft melody as the others watched on.

 

“See it plays Paul .” He carefully put it down on the couch.

 

They watched Paul’s head sink into his chest as he passed out.

 

“Right then let’s get him up and to bed.” John stated , taking charge.

 

 

They lifted him up with much difficulty, John on one side George the other. Ringo went over and opened the door as wide as he could.

“Yer not gonna fit , the three of yous . The door and stairs are to narrow.”

 

 

John accessed the situation. He looked to George.

“Let em go Geo.”

 

 

George released the full weight on to John . He pulled Paul up and threw him over his shoulder.

“Christ I know ya lost weight but yer still dead heavy.”

 

 

“He’s just dead weight Johnny.” Ringo chuckled.

 

 

John struggled through the door and down the stairs. He carefully took one step at a time readjusting Paul’s weight. When he finally made it down the stairs , he took him to one of the guest rooms that were left untouched. Throwing him on the bed, the weight was lifted off of him for a second time in the past hour. He felt lighter again and leaned up to the wall catching his breath.

 

 

Ringo covered him as he slept. Then they slowly filed out the door unsure of what to do next.

 

 

 

 

They walked in the kitchen stepping over the mess. Ringo put the kettle on and George sat down lighting a cigarette for him and the others. They took it gratefully. John walked over to the phone.

 

 

“We need to get this cleaned up. I’m gonna call Yoko, have her pack a bag and come by. I’m not leaving him alone. “ John again scanned over the wreckage as he picked up the phone.

“Hullo mother.” He pulled the cord into the other room , talking softly so he wouldn’t be heard.

 

“John…..Is everything alright?” she queried.

 

 

“We got in and found him dead pissed he was. He’s sleepin it off. The whole house is a pile of rubbish. Seems he did take out some anger after all. He went sparce; tore up the place quite nicely, we’re gonna have to clean it up. I’m staying for the duration so why don’t you pack us up a bag and have Les bring you by.’

 

 

 

“What about the crowds?”

 

 

“Just have Les drive in and park as close to the back as you can. Go in the back way .”

 

 

“I’ll be there soon. I guess I’ll help clean the place up.”

 

 

“That would be gear. Oh and mother do hurry , you know how I hate to be with out you for to long,”

 

 

“I will.” She hung up the phone and thought about what she was walking into . She didn’t feel like fighting off the press and fans. She certainly didn’t feel like cleaning up this mess that John had been talking about. She sighed and packed up their bags. She loved him and would do anything for him , so clean the house she would.

 

 

 

 

 

Later that night, after hours of clean up the house was livable once again. All of Sandy’s presence was gone. John simply said they deloused it of Sandy just as if they were exterminators. They sat in the living room exhausted, sitting around watching the television. George and Ringo had made their phone calls home, explaining they were staying the night and would be home sometime tomorrow. The phone rang loudly and no one wanted to get up to answer it. Finally, George did thinking it might be Pattie since she said she’d call later to see how things were going.

 

 

“Hullo?”

 

“George?” came a familiar voice.

 

 

“Mike is that you mate?”

 

 

“Yeah, I been ringing this bleedin phone since the story broke in the papers about Sandy. Dad’s worried sick and so are the aunties. How’s our kid? He ok?”

 

 

“Naww he aint. I reckon he’s fightin his demons. “

 

 

“Cor , George we’ve been trying to talk to him the last few months but Sandy always makes some excuse that he can’t come to the phone. I haven’t talked to my brother since the wedding.”

 

 

“Right , the witch took him over the edge she did.”

 

 

“Where is he? Can I talk with him?”

 

 

“A he’s sleepin it off. Been rather heavy with the bottle lately and since all this, even worse.”

 

 

“John there?”

 

 

“Hold on a sec I’ll get him.” George put the phone down and went into the living room.

 

“Johnny it’s Mike . He wants a word.”

 

 

John gave George a quizzical look.

 

 

“Paul’s brother.” George told him.

 

 

“Right.” John got up and went into the kitchen .

 

 

“Well if it isn’t Michael McCartney as I live and breath.” John chirped into the phone.

 

 

“And the famous Lennon I presume .” they chuckled a little before Mike went into the seriousness of the situation.

“George told me about our boy there. Bad as all that is he?”

 

 

“Far worse I suspect. Yoko and me we’re gonna stay with him. He needs to get off the sauce. Quite frankly Mike you wouldn’t know him. He’s lost himself. A right sad bastard he is. We’re gonna work on him though.”

 

 

“I’m leaving first thing in the morning to come down. Dad wants to come but I’m not going to let him see Paul like this. I’m not going to let on either just how bad he is.”

 

 

 

“Good, it wouldn’t do him any to know how bad things are. Mike, he isn’t the Paulie you know right now. Just remember that coming in.”

 

 

“I will….and John ta for looking out for him and tell the rest ta also. I’ll be there early afternoon. “

 

 

“Right, then we’ll see you.”

 

 

Mike hung up the phone and sat down on the bed. He looked up as Ro walked over to him. She sat down on the bed next to him.

 

“Did you talk to him?” She asked noticing his down heart demeanor.

 

“No, I spoke with George and John they’re with him and I suppose Ritch as well. They tell me my big brother isn’t doing well at all. I knew something was up when she wouldn’t let any of us talk to him. We’ve always been close you know that. Even with all the rows we’ve had, it’s just being brothers. I should have gone to him, helped him.” He hung his head shamefully.

 

 

She rubbed his back, soothing his downheartedness.

“You couldn’t have known Mike. Know of us did. We were starting to suspect but she was a good liar. “

 

 

He shook his head in agreement.

“I’m going to him Ro. I need to be there for him and Dad can’t know how bad he is. I’m leaving before he can argue about coming along.”

 

 

“I agree , you go to him , take what time you need to help him. I’ll talk to dad and tell him you’ve gone . “ she assured him.

 

 

 

He looked up at his loving wife and was glad for her understanding and comfort. The whole family loved her. Paul had told him many a time how lucky he was and not to mess it up.

 

“I love you .” she whispered to him.

 

“I love you too. Ta Ro for understanding.”

 

 

He leaned over and kissed her. Yes, he was a lucky man. He only wished Paul had been so lucky. He wished now more then ever that Paul had married Cynthia instead. She would have been perfect for him in everyway. He only hoped he could help bring his brother back from the hell he imagined Paul had gone through.