Stronger Than I Am - Pt. 1

“Things around here haven’t changed much It’s all pretty much the same stuff day after day The only thing that keeps me goin’ Seems to be our baby girl I’m trying to raise She’s my life my morning angel Always seems to find the rainbow after the rain Lately she’s so busy growin’ I don’t even think she knows you’ve gone away

Chorus

She finally learned to say good bye She’s sleepin’ through the night She don’t wake up cryin’ And she’s walkin’ on her own She don’t need no on holdin’ to her hand And I hate to admit she’s stronger than I am

She ain’t crackin’ under pressure First one step then another she goes along If she falls and skins her knee She cries awhile then smiles at me and just goes on So many things she can teach me Full of life and so completely innocent She still says she loves her daddy Goes on just like nothin’ happened Forgives and forgets

Repeat Chorus

She’s just like her old man Stronger than I am

(Stronger Than I Am By Lee Ann Womack)

*The year 2006*

I stood looking at our beautiful baby girl. Andria was now 3 and had my dirty blonde hair, her daddy’s deep brown eyes and his smile. She had the eyes of my one true love, the only man I ever loved and would ever love. I could remember the last time I’d seen him happy and healthy like it was yesterday. It was just a little over two years ago. Our little Andria, short for Alexandria Nicole, was almost a year old.

*Flashback* *June of 2004*

“Come to Daddy Andria. Come on come tell Daddy bye bye.” Aj said bending down so he was leave with Andria. Andria shakily walked to him. She only had to walk about 2 feet but she had only been walking for about two days. So she still needed somebody to hold her hand most of the time. “Yay good girl!” Aj exclaimed when she got there and fell into his arms hugging him. He picked her up, twirling her in slow circles while she giggled. I had to giggle at them just a little. He stopped and held her close to him smiling at me. He had a gorgeous smile, it was one that could melt my heart every time. I smiled at him and he walked over to me. “Go play Andria.” He said sitting her on the ground. She quickly fell to her hands and knees and crawled over to her toys. “We make beautiful children.” He whispered with a smile.

“Yes we do.” I agreed smiling back.

“I promise I’ll be home by 11.” He stated pulling me into his arms.

“Ok.” I stated. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He smiled and kissed me. He stood there holding me in his arms for a couple minutes like he always did. He let go and walked over to Andria and picked her up. “Give Daddy a kiss goodbye.” He said. She leaned over and gave him a big slobbery kiss on the cheek. “Thanks baby.” He laughed wiping the slobber of his face. He walked back over to me and handed her to me.

“Can you tell Daddy bye Andria?” I asked. She had started talking a little the last few moths and could say things like ‘mama, dada, bye, hi, eat and drink.”

“Bye Dada.” She said waving her little hand. We both giggled at her a little and smiled.

“I’ll see ya tonight Chloe, I love you.” He said and pecked me on the lips.

“Love you too Alex.” I smiled. He smiled and turned around walking to the car. “Wave to Daddy Andria.” I told her. She lifted her little hand and we both waved at Aj. He smiled and waved back as he pulled out of the driveway. Andria and I stood there waving till he was out of site then we went back in.

*End Flashback*

If I’d have known that was the last time I’d see him healthy and acting like himself I’d have never of let him leave. I wouldn’t of let him out of my arms. I was lucky enough to get to say good-bye to him atleast. I got the call about 10:30 telling me what had happened.

*Flashback*

It was 10:30 and I had just gotten Andria to sleep when the phone rang. She had been really fussy and whining for Aj.

“Hello.” I answered.

“Chloe, it’s Brian.”

“Hey Bri! What’s up?”

“Chloe sweets, are you sitting down?”

“What happened Brian?” I worriedly asked and sat down.

“Aj was on his way home and he, he got hit by a drunk driver. You need to get here, now.”

“What hospital?” I asked. He quickly told me what hospital and we hung up.

“Hey Chloe I’m here! Where are you?” I heard Bj Nick’s little sister yell.

“Oh god Bj you have amazing timing. Stay here with Andria I have to go to the hospital.” I stated grabbing my keys and purse.

“Why? What Happened?” She asked worried.

“Aj got hit by a drunk driver.” I stated. “Oh god, go! I’ll stay here with her and if you want her there call.” She said. I nodded and went out the door. 5 minutes later I was at the hospital. I ran into the waiting room and found Brian, LeighAnne, Kristin, Kevin, Nick, his wife Lori, Howie, and his wife Carrie. Brian ran up to me and pulled me into his arms and I cried on his shoulder. I had known Brian for most of my life. He was 9 and I was 6 when we first met.

“Do you know anything yet?” I asked through my tears.

“Not yet.” He answered. We pulled away and I took a seat between him and Nick. Nick put his arm around me and held me.

“Did anybody call Denise?” I asked.

“Yea I called her.” Kevin said I nodded my head and sat there waiting.

“Denise!” I shouted when she walked into the waiting room.

“Chloe sweetheart!” She said pulling me into her arms. “Have you heard anything?”

“No.” I stated as the tears started running down my cheeks again.

“Hey it’s ok he’ll be fine. My son’s a strong man.” She stated tears running down her cheeks too. We pulled away and I wiped the tears from my eyes and gave her a small smile. “Why don’t we sit down?” She suggested. I nodded my head and took my seat between Nick and Brian and she sat down beside Kevin. We all sat there for about 10 minutes when the doctor finally came in. We jumped up knowing he was Aj’s doctor since we were the only one’s in the waiting room.

“Are you all here with Mr. McLean?” He asked.

“Yes.” We all answered.

“Ok, I’m Dr. Mark Sanders I was the one who worked on Mr. McLean. He is in emergency surgery right now. Who in here is family?” He asked.

“I’m his mother.” Denise stated stepping forward.

“I’m his wife.” I said also stepping forward.

“Ok if you two could please follow me I’ll tell you the condition of Mr. McLean.” He stated. Denise started to follow him but I objected.

“No! What ever you have to say you can say in front of Aj’s best friends.” I said.

“Well why don’t you all take a seat then.” He stated we all sat down and he began telling us what had happened. “Aj was in a head on collision. He was going about 60 and the guy that hit him was going about 60 too. We think that the guy that hit him was going about 70 when he seen your husband and slowed down. The air bag deployed and he was wearing a seatbelt those are the only two things that kept him from dying on the scene. He has a broken collarbone from being pressed up against the seat belt so hard when they crashed. His right leg is broken in three spots and so we have to put pins in it so it’ll grow back together straight. That’s one of the things they’re doing in surgery. He also has a couple broken ribs from the impact. One of the ribs punctured his left lung. They’re trying to fix that in surgery also. He has a lot of internal bleeding and has lost a lot of blood. I can’t tell you much more till after he gets out of surgery.” The doctor told us. We were all in tears by the time he finished. “I’ll leave you all alone and I’m going to go up to surgery. I’ll come back down after he’s out and tell you how it went, but first are there any questions?” He asked.

“How long should the surgery take?” Howie asked.

“We don’t know. Were not exactly sure the extent of his injuries.” Dr. Sanders said.

“What happened to the other guy?” Denise asked. I could tell there was anger in her voice.

“He died at the scene.” He replied. Denise shook her head I could tell she was glad. I had to admit so was I.

“Is that all the questions?” He asked. Everybody but me nodded. Dr. Sanders was about to go out the door but I stopped him.

“Dr. Sanders?” I stated. He turned back around and looked at me.

“Yes?” He asked.

“What are his chances?” I asked. I had gone through a couple years a med. school so I knew some stuff.

“95 over 5 percent.” He stated sadly.

“Thank you.” I stated my voice cracking from the tears. He turned around and left.

“Chloe tell me 95 percent is the chance he has for living. Please tell me those are happy tears because he has a good chance of living.” Denise begged me with tears streaming down her face.

“I’m sorry Denise I can’t do that. He only has a 5% chance of living.” I cried. Denise and I hugged each other. We were all upset and angry but I was scared. I may have been 24 but how was I supposed to raise Andria by my self. Aj was supposed to be there for her for years to come. To see her graduate, to walk her down the aisle and by the way it looked he wouldn’t get to see her 2nd birthday.

Part 2

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