You've Been In Guard Too Long If...

• All your equipment has names.
• You can tell which flag is the cursed flag that no one can catch.
• You buy everday clothing from guard catalogs.
• You have your own seat on the band/guard bus and actually does have your name on it.
• You spin things you shouldn't. Like rakes, brooms, and tree branches.
• You've made yourself a mini-flag out of a pencil and a small scrap of cloth.
• You actually use that homemade mini-flag.
• You understand guard only humor.
• You have enemies in other bands or guards.
• You understand and relate to all of the above items.