Tom: Yes I am.

Blood Fever

Tom: I tried to stop her, but she got very hostile and bit me.

Chakotay: She bit you?

Tom: And she seemed to be enjoying it...in a Klingon kind of way.

Tom: If I remember my Klingon customs, biting someone on the face means... B'Elanna: I know what it means!

B'Elanna: I've picked up your scent, Tom. I've tasted your blood.

Tom: No...no, I'm your friend. And I have to watch out for you when your judgement's been impaired. If you let these instincts take over now, you'll hate yourself, and me too, for taking advantage of you. I won't do that.

Tom: Are you telling me that I'm impossible to resist?

B'Elanna: I wouldn't go that far!

B'Elanna: You've never been hard to get, Tom.

Tom: Well, I'm making an exception. I can't let you do this.

B'Elanna: Oh, but you wish you could. All those invitations to dinner, and on the holodeck, the way you would stare at me when you thought I wasn't looking and get jealous when I'm with someone else. You can't tell me you're not interested in me.

Tom: You're right, I can't.

B'Elanna: Then don't push me away!

Tom: Oh, believe me, I'd like to. But I know this isn't really you. You've made it clear that you're not interested. And I have to accept that's how you feel, even now.

B'Elanna: No, it isn't. I...I was just afraid to admit it. You see, Ive wanted this for so long. Just let it happen.

Tom: I hope someday you'll say that to me one day and mean it.

Tom: B'Elanna, I know this a pretty bizarre situation, probably not what either one of us had in mind, but it's too late to worry about that now.

B'Elanna: Tom...

Tom: What?

B'Elanna: Be quiet.

Tom: So, is this the part where you throw heavy objects at me?

B'Elanna: Maybe later...

B'Elanna: Well, what are you doing?

Tom: Enjoying myself?

B'Elanna: Then show it!

Vorik: I declare Koonun-kali-fay.

Tuvok: The ritual challenge. He intends to fight to win his mate.

Tom: You want a fight, you've got one!

B'Elanna: I am not your mate!

Vorik: We shall soon decide that!

B'Elanna: If anyone is going to smash your arrogant little face in, I will! I take your challenge myself!

Tom: Yeah, I know. You're afraid that your big, scary Klingon side might have been showing. Well, I saw it up close. And you know, it wasn't so terrible. In fact, I wouldn't mind seeing it again someday.

B'Elanna: Careful what you wish for, Lieutenant.

Real Life

Tom: A beautiful woman should never have to eat alone. What are you reading?

B'Elanna: It's nothing important.

Tom: Women Warriors at the River of Blood?

B'Elanna: It's just...escapist reading.

Tom: "Rorg turned his fierce eye upon her. M'Nea felt her heart begin to quicken even as her hand went to her dagger. She had intended to plunge it into his throat, but something about him made her hesitate..." B'Elanna, is this a Klingon romance novel?

B'Elanna: Klingons do have what you may call a romantic side. It's a bit more vigorous than most.

Tom: I think I'll read it. Maybe it'll give me some ideas on how to make your heart quicken.

B'Elanna: It's not a technical manual, Tom.

Tom: That depends on what you mean by 'technical'.

B'Elanna: To an engineer it means 'specializing in particular systems'.

Tom: I think that definition works.

B'Elanna: Well, I can't promise I won't put a dagger in your throat.

Distant Origin

Tom: I'll bet you it's an anodyne relay

B'Elanna: No way, plasma conduit.

Tom: Relay. I'm telling you, I checked the conduit network.

B'Elanna: My point exactly. You're not an engineer.

Tom: I'll bet you.

B'Elanna: Name it.

Gegen: Male and female interacting. Let's observe.

Tom: Well?

B'Elanna: Well...go ahead and gloat.

Tom: Anodyne relays. Who would have guessed?

B'Elanna: Just a shot in the dark.

Tom: And it hit the bull's eye. Tonight you pay up. Holodeck two. Klingon martial arts program. No getting out of it this time.

Sidekick: Courting behavior?

Gegen: Exactly. Note how the female through her feigned antagonism encourages the male in his attempt to mate.

Sidekick: Uh, there's no sign of vassal dilation in their skin.

Gegen: Obviously they never evolved in that ability. Which would explain their reliance on crude, verbal interplay.

Tom: I'll see you tonight. BYOB.

B'Elanna: BYOB?

Tom: Bring Your Own Batleth.

Displaced

B'Elanna: I have tried this and now I am finished. Got it?

Tom: Look, if you don't like the program, that's fine. But why do you always have to get so hostile?

B'Elanna: I am not hostile!!.

Torres: I'm forthright. I speak my mind. That's very different from being hostile.

Kim: Very different.

Torres: You don't think I'm hostile, do you?

Kim: Uh... no?

Torres: And if someone were to say I was hostile, they'd be way off base, right?

Kim: Oh, absolutely.

Torres: Then how come you look like you're afraid for your life?

Paris: I would have thought all that hot Klingon blood would have kept you warm.

Torres: Shows how much you know about Klingons. They have much less tolerance for the cold than Humans do.

Paris: Really? I thought that was Cardassians.

Torres: No, they just complain about it more.

Tom: On your feet now, Torres. That's an order!

B'Elanna: You can't order me, we're the same rank!

Tom: I'm a bridge officer, and I have seniority.

B'Elanna: Yeah, by about two days!

B'Elanna: Things were pretty chilly there for awhile.

Tom: I guess they were.

B'Elanna: Feels good to be warm again.

Tom: Yeah, sure does.

Worst Case Scenario

B'Elanna: Do you make it a habit of walking into other peoples private holodeck programs?

Tom: Well, it's not like I caught you dancing the rumba with a naked Bolian.

B'Elanna: There is room in every good story for a little bit of passion.

Tom: You know, I think you may be on to something. We could add a steamy love scene between the Maquis engineer and the Starfleet conn officer.

B'Elanna: Oh, that's realistic.

Day of Honor

B'Elanna: Let me access your controls.

Tom: I thought you'd never ask.

Tom: Why is it we have to be beamed into space in environmental suits before I can initiate first contact procedures?

B'Elanna: Why is it that if we're alone for more than 30 seconds, you start thinking about contact?

Tom: Ah, that's not fair. The other day in engineering, I must have gone four minutes before I started thinking about it.

B'Elanna: I never would have made it to the third year. If I hadn't dropped out, they would have asked me to leave.

Tom: I wish I'd known you then.

B'Elanna: You'd have hated me.

Tom: I can't imagine a time I wouldn't have found you fascinating.

Tom: There's something I've been meaning to ask you.

B'Elanna: Well, now's the time.

Tom: When we first met, you didn't have a very high opinion of me.

B'Elanna: That's putting it mildly. I thought you were an arrogant, self-absorbed pig.

Tom: Do you think I've changed?

B'Elanna: A lot. Now you're a stubborn, domineering pig...I'm just kidding. There I go again, just pushing you away. You were right about me. It's what I do...push people away.

Tom: Well, it's a surefire way of not getting hurt.

B'Elanna: There's something I have to say.

Tom: Me too. I'm glad the last thing I see is you.

B'Elanna: I have to tell you something...I have to tell you the truth.

Tom: The truth about what?

B'Elanna: I love you...Say something.

Tom: You picked a great time to tell me.

Revulsion

B'Elanna: Does this mean that you're too tired to meet later...in my quarters?

Tom: Are you sure your heart can take it?

Doctor: I'm detecting elevated hormone levels. If you two don't take it easy, I'll have to declare a medical emergency.

Scientific Method

Torres: I must be completely paranoid about getting caught in a compromising position.

Paris: Kind of exciting, isn't it?

B'Elanna: All right, then we're agreed. Just be a little more careful in public and we don't say anything to anybody.

Tom: At least for now.

B'Elanna: Now? Sounds like you see a future in this.

Tom: I would never be so presumptuous.

B'Elanna: Smooth recovery, Lieutenant.

Tom: I thought so.

B'Elanna: It was nice you could get the night off.

Tom: "Nice" had nothing to do with it. I switched shifts with Ensign Wildman, which means tomorrow I'll pull a double shift on the bridge and with the Doc.

B'Elanna: Well, I appreciate the sacrifice. Tell me about the wine.

Tom: K'tarian merlot, 2282. You might want to let it breathe first.

B'Elanna: We've got all night to let it breathe.

B'Elanna: Sometimes it's nice to be the chief engineer.

Tom: Try the salad, chief.

B'Elanna: Mmm, this is really delicious.

Tom: Thanks, I replicated it myself.

B'Elanna: Mmm, you're too good for me.

B'Elanna: We have been a little out of control lately.

Tom: Do you think we really were?

B'Elanna: What?

Tom: Out of control. Those aliens could have just been messing around with our hormones, just to see what would happen.

B'Elanna: You're right, they could have. And we don't know how long they were on board. They could have been tampering with us for months.

Tom: Well, when you think about it, you did have a pretty abrupt change of heart a couple of weeks ago. What made realize that you love me all of a sudden?

B'Elanna: Just a feeling...So our whole relationship might be based on some alien experiment.

Tom: You never know.

B'Elanna: Well, I think that explains it.

Tom: I guess we should just call it off then.

B'Elanna: I think so.

Tom: Thank god we found out in time...

B'Elanna: Thank god...

Tom: I don't know about you, but I'm curious to see how this "experiment" turns out...

Gravity

Tom: When I first met her she wouldn't even look at me. But she warmed up after, oh...Three years.

Doctor: The longest flirtation in Starfleet history.

Tom: No kidding

Noss: She sounds...fascinating.

Tom: I just hope I see her again.

Noss: You must really ... bot yah jouton

Doctor: 'Love her very much'

Tom: Yeah.

Juggernaut

Tom: Take it from me--getting B'Elanna to control her temper is like convincing a Ferengi to leave his estate to charity.

Tom: B'Elanna...Aren't you forgetting something?

B'Elanna: I don't think so.

Tom: Well...Uh, a 'good-bye' would be nice? 'So long,' 'see you soon'--something along those lines.

B'Elanna: I didn't want to risk it.

Tom: Risk what?

B'Elanna: Starting an argument.

Tom: Ha! Argument? Us? So, I hear it's been a short fuse kind of day.

B'Elanna: About this long.

Tom: Nothing you can't handle.

B'Elanna: If you think so.

Tom: I know so.

B'Elanna: I suppose it's always going to be like this. Me against the galaxy.

Tom: Well, the galaxy doesn't stand a chance.

Tom: Now...Promise me that you're going to be careful over there. No stopping to have fun.

B'Elanna: Fun? On a Malon freighter?

Someone To Watch Over Me

B'Elanna: How the hell do you know when we're having intimate relations?!?

Seven: There is no one on Deck Nine, Section 12 who doesn't know when you're having intimate relations.

Vis~A~Vis

Torres: So this is where you've been hiding? A garage?

Paris: It's more than just a garage! This is a monument to hundreds and hundreds of hours... that I probably should have spent with you.

Torres: 'Probably'?

Paris: Definitely.

Torres: It's a lovely garage, Tom--but I still don't understand why you brought me here.

Paris: Consider it a symbolic gesture. It's my less than subtle attempt to.... let you in.

Torres: I see. To make it clear that I mean almost as much to you as a... cam-a-ro.

Paris: It's a Mint Condition! Nineteen-Sixty-Nine!.. Cuh-mare-oh. And yes...you mean a lot more to me.

Equinox

Tom: 'B.L.T.'?

B'Elanna: 'Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato'--it was a nickname.

Tom: Nickname?

B'Elanna: My initials.

Tom: Oh...How romantic.

B'Elanna: We broke up over ten years ago. No need to go to red alert.

Tom: How about yellow alert?

B'Elanna: You're cute when you're jealous.

Tom: Who's jealous?

Max: I'm not the p'tak I used to be. Let me prove it to you.

B'Elanna: Look, Max...don't get me wrong. It's good to see you again, but--ten years...

Max: Tom Paris.

B'Elanna: Tom Paris.

Max: You could do worse.

Quotes from Course: Oblivion will be up in a spot all by themselves in the upcoming 'P/T Wedding Page'.

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