One day, Dank and the rest of 7th Deli were "chillin'" at Bob's house, and Dank was, as usual, being picked on miserably. Bob was teasing him about being too attached to "that palm tree." Dank was cying into Shelley's fronds and Melvin had this evil look in his eye, kinda like "Bob-if-you-don't-stop-it-I'm-gonna-go-Tarzan-on-you!" Velvetta was egging Bob on because Shelley was always getting tangled up in his pipes and Velvetta was trying desperatly to get back in Bob's good graces ever since he got cool hair.
Well, Dank finally got up and left, taking Shelley with him. He and Shelley took a walk down the street (which was hard, all things considered) and Dank started thinking. (which was also hard for him!)
Dank was the only other blonde lad, except Bob, and following his twisted fiddler's logic, he thought that if he wasn't blonde, maybe Bob wouldn't pick on him! Inspired, Dank and Shelley ran to the Dollar Tree for some hair dye!
Once inside the Dollar Tree, Dank wandered past rows and rows of cheap plastic crap and imitation Naugahide to the bottles of hair dye. There was every color in the rainbow, even the technicolor rainbow! Dank couldn't decide what color he wanted his hair to be, and he was about to sit down on the floor and have a conniption when he heard a whisper from Shelley's fronds.
"Blue..." it whispered. Dank, who was even more superstious than Bob, got very scared. "Dye it blue....dark blue....to match your Yankee pants..." Now, Dank was very proud of his Yankee pants and thought that whatever had posessed Shelley (Amangalhotep perhaps?) was pretty darn smart. So he bought the hair dye, went out into the back alley and dyed his hair blue.
"Beautiful!" Shelley whispered. Dank was quite proud of his blue hair and went back to Bob's house.
Well, Bob and Co. were quite, ah, tickled by Dank's blue hair and proceeded to laugh hysterically for several hours. Dank, miserable again, sobbed into Shelley's fronds for the rest of the day.
