Bob was lonely late one Saturday. The deli had been closed for the night and his girlfriend, Egg the Orange had gone back to the produce department. He sighed. "What a lonely life I lead." he thought.
Suddenly, there was a knock on his freezer door. "Who could that be?" Bob wondered. Slowly he opened the door. And there was MacDude, the Goat Cheese!! Bob was so happy to see MacDude some of that little black stuff that's in salami flew off him as he jumped up and down. Once Bob had settled down, MacDude asked "So, Bob, are ya busy?" Bob, not wanting to seem too desperate, said "Well, hmm......nope. I had to cancel my plans for tonight. Yeah.." "Great!" replyed MacDude, "Then you can come and help us out a little can't you?" Bob was very excited and said "SURE!! But, uh, what are you doing?" "Well," responded MacDude, "I'll tell you if, you promise not to tell anyone!" Bob was about to go into a mad frenzy!! He was just a salami and as we all know, they love secrets! "Tell me, tell me tell me!!!!" Bob shouted. "Okay. Chill." said the goat cheese. "We're starting a band. We're calling ourselves the 7th Deli and we need someone to do vocals and guitar. You can play the guitar can't you?"
Now, Bob wasn't exactly the world's best guitar player but, he thought, I can learn.... "Sure." said Bob. " I can play the guitar like Beethoven played the piano." It was a lie but, hey, he was just a salami.....
"Awesome dude!" exclaimed MacDude. "Let's get rolling!!"
And off they went to the dairy aisle.............
Bob was fascinated with the vast array of meats and cheeses down this aisle. It was so much more than he'd ever seen locked up in the freezer. He was stupefied. The salami and goat cheese soon arrived where they were headed. The Milk. Bob and MacDude jumped up in the milk case and MacDude introduced Bob to the rest of the 7th Deli.
There was the drummer, Hellman the Mayo. The bassist, Don Juan the Pecan. And last but certainly not least, there was Olive the Loaf. He was the piper. (Betcha didn't know that Olive Loaves make awesome pipers....)
Bob picked up his guitar and the 7th Deli had their first real jam session. They were awesome! Foodstuffs came from as far away as the lobster tank to hear them. They had truly struck gold with this combination!!
All their fun was cut short when the grocer's son came in to make himself a sandwich. With pecans for dessert. And all that was left of the 7th Deli after that night was a droopy little chunk of salami, rotting in the corner of the deli case. And the entire store mourned the loss of Olive, Don Juan, Hellman, and MacDude, that loveable old goat cheese. But they eventually got over it or were sold. And new deli bands were formed. The most famous being led by Bob's grand-nephew, Tony the Tomato. He was the lead singer for a wee little band called The Rolling Sandwichs.
Got a Bob Story request? Then E-mail it to me dude!!
Look! Look at my counter!! See? Okay you can stop looking now. Go away. Shoo!!
