Colin had been gazing at her from the safety of the merch table for weeks, from behind the stacks of T-shirts, peering soulfully, hoping she'd look his way. But alas, her heart was Dank's and she had no way to know his betrayal was moments away. Dank told her after the concert in Michigan, that things "weren't working out" and that he "didn't have room in his life for her anymore." Shelley was VERY distraught, slapped Dank with a frond, and ran off to cry. How was she going to survive in Michigan? After all she'd done for Dank, and now THIS! She felt betrayed and very hurt. Colin found her sobbing in a corner of the abandoned stage, and comforted her.
"I love you," he said, and carried her to the truck. "Michigan is a wonderful state. And so few palms. You'll shine like the little star you are. Why travel the venues with the shabby crew of Seventh Deli? We can build a little shack here on the shores of Lake Urbansewage, and live happily forever." Shelley was overwhelmed. She hadn't known that Colin loved her so. She sniffled a little, then shrugged, and agreed to stay with Colin.
They had a quiet little ceremony in a tiny chapel just a mile down the road. It was clearly a match made in palm tree heaven. Shelley never looked healthier, and Colin finally got that somewhat terrorized expression off his face. (The one he had gotten in the harrying job of being Bob's right-hand-man. After the glitter incident in the Beer Commune, Colin had been forced into therapy for his post-traumatic stress syndrome. He had been taking Prozac, but now that he had Shelley, he didn't need it anymore!)
He and Shelley lived on Lake Urbansewage for the rest of their lives. They had three fern-children, who went on to go to Harvard and become lawyers, who promptly sued Dank for abandonment.
THE END
By the Acoylte of Bobness, Laura with the tiniest smidge of help from Nogling
Note from the High Holy Goddess of Bobishness: Maybe I can think up a decent author's note once I stop giggling!! LOL!! It's hilarious!! You just have to have my visual. Oh gods...*grin*
In Bob We Trust,
~Lids!~
RUNAWAY!!
